Oh no! I've been kept as a pet by a stray killer whale!

At this moment, the chat room was filled with laughter.

The tense atmosphere of survival vanished the moment Jiang Che was thrown ashore like trash.

[Hahahaha! What did I just see? A trapeze artist?]

This orca understands physics! That parabolic trajectory would make Archimedes weep!

[Anchor: My imagined landing is a hero's return. Orca: Here you go! I'll throw you out!]

Dear customer, your package has been delivered. Please check it. If you are not satisfied, please do not leave a negative review, otherwise we will pursue you relentlessly.

[Don't be so toxic! This is definitely true love! Didn't you guys see that orca's tail sway just now? It used the tip of its tail to support the streamer as it was sent out. If it had filmed directly, the streamer would be a pile of minced meat by now.]

[It's so heartwarming... I laughed and then cried. Even though their movements were a bit rough, they genuinely wanted to get the streamer ashore.]

[Followed! This livestream is amazing! It's not just about survival, it's a hilarious cross-species daily life!]

Amidst a screen full of "hahahaha" and gift effects, the live stream's popularity soared once again.

On the beach, Jiang Che's test had only just begun.

Logging in is just the first step.

The real challenge is how to survive without water or food, while also caring for this group of stubborn, multi-ton giant babies.

"Uh...ha...ha..."

Jiang Che used both hands and feet, like a sea turtle that had just crawled out of its shell and hadn't yet adapted to gravity, as he awkwardly crawled from the wet shallows to the dry, higher ground.

With each step I took, my muscles protested with aches and pains.

Especially after just experiencing that "human cannonball" landing, although no bones were broken, soft tissue contusions were definitely inevitable.

But he dared not stop.

Although this is a tropical island, the hypothermia caused by prolonged immersion in seawater has not completely subsided.

He had to dry himself off as quickly as possible and get away from the high tide line.

Finally, after climbing out about ten meters and confirming that the seawater was temporarily out of his reach, Jiang Che's taut string snapped completely.

Whether it's finding fresh water, setting up shelters, or that live-streaming drone still flying in the sky...

Fuck it.

All I want to do right now is lie down.

Jiang Che didn't even have the strength to turn over; he simply collapsed onto the scorching sand in a "spread-eagle" position.

Close your eyes.

Sunlight streamed through my eyelids, bringing a warm, reddish glow.

The sand on his back felt like a giant hot compress, continuously delivering heat to his cold spine. That long-lost sense of security made him feel intensely dizzy and sleepy almost instantly.

Alive.

These two words have never felt so profound yet so beautiful.

The exhaustion from surviving the ordeal overwhelmed him like a tidal wave. He felt like a salted fish being roasted in the sun, shriveled but at least not afraid of being eaten.

"Just let me...sleep for a while..."

Jiang Che murmured to himself, "Even five minutes would be fine..."

However, life is always full of "surprises".

Especially when you get entangled with a group of "street hustlers" who don't understand social distancing and rest time.

Just as Jiang Che was entering a dazed state, and was about to let out his first snore, a noisy, sharp, and penetrating sound came from the nearby seaside.

"grumble--!!"

"Gagaga!!"

"puff--!"

That was the high-frequency pulse sound unique to whales and dolphins, mixed with the sound of their huge tail fins slapping the water.

very noisy.

It's like a construction crew is drilling into the wall downstairs from your house, and they're drilling with five drills at the same time.

Jiang Che frowned and painfully covered his ears with his hands, trying to block out the noise.

But that damned system translation function directly affects the brain's nerves.

The next second, the noise automatically transformed into crystal clear "Northeast Group Chat," forcibly drilling into his mind.

"Hey? Bro! Why isn't this thing moving?"

The first to speak was still that overly curious brat, "Yingying Monster".

Its innermost thoughts were filled with worry and doubt:

"Wasn't it all high and mighty in the air just now? How come it's all crippled as soon as it landed? Did it use too much force during that 'soft landing' and break it into pieces?"

"Nonsense!"

Big Fatty immediately retorted in his booming voice, a forced toughness tinged with guilt:

"That was a professional throw! The mechanics were perfect! How could it possibly break? It must be... it's... charging up! Yeah, even land monkeys need to sunbathe to charge up!"

"But husband..." the gentle "wife" orca interjected, her tone tinged with disdain, "The way he's lying there is so ugly, like a dried-out starfish. And look, he's not moving at all, is he dead? If he's dead, it won't be fun. How about... we eat him while he's still warm?"

"Wait!" the mischievous child cried out. "I haven't poked you even once! I haven't even been tickled yet! You can't die! Pet, get up!"

"Quiet down, everyone!"

Finally, it was the grandmother who made the final decision.

Its voice remained steady, but carried an undeniable air of authority:

"Based on my observations back then, bipedal creatures, though fragile, have decent regenerative abilities. He's probably just being lazy now and trying to renege on his debt."

bilk?

Upon hearing those two words, the chubby guy, who had initially felt a little guilty, instantly flew into a rage.

"What?! You're going back on your word?!"

Big Fatty angrily rolled over in the shallow water, stirring up a wave.

"I went through all that trouble to pull him out of the deep sea, then drove dozens of nautical miles on the highway to bring him back. I was exhausted! And here he is, lying down at my doorstep, pretending to be dead? And refusing to pay the technician?"

"This is so lacking in humanitarian spirit!"

"No! We can't spoil him! We have to make him start doing business!"

Jiang Che, lying on the beach: "..."

He was actually already awake.

I was woken up by that shout.

Hearing these guys describe him as a "customer who refuses to pay," he felt like a million alpacas were stampeding through his mind.

Guys!

I am a human being! I am a carbon-based life form!

I survived a shipwreck, drifting, hunger, dehydration, and your deadly "orca roller coaster." It's a medical miracle that I'm still alive!

Would it kill you to let me rest for a bit?!

Jiang Che closed his eyes tightly, determined to play dead to the very end.

He bet these guys wouldn't make it ashore; he figured if he ignored them, they'd get bored and leave on their own.

But he clearly underestimated the street urchins' persistence and their obsession with "scratching."

"Hey! Still not moving?"