I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

Because he was wearing headphones, the guy's voice at me was unusually loud. However, feeling embarrassed about this situation didn't seem to be any use. Looking at it from another perspective, such a naive guy was quite rare these days.

"Well, whatever you think is appropriate." At this time, there seems to be no other option except to respond with a smile.

"Um..." She took it off and asked me nervously, "Can we try a few more?"

"...certainly."

I'm not a picky person, and I'll buy anything I like if I have the money, but if she's interested, it wouldn't be a big deal if she tried a few more. After all, there are quite a few models available, but they're mostly over-ear models.

But putting that aside for now, accompanying a girl shopping in a store is something that can be boasted about. Of course, apart from Ye Hui, who already knows a little about it, it would be best if this matter was kept secret from Lin Quanchuan. So, having something to brag about but not being able to easily let others know is more of a misfortune than a blessing.

Of course, this wasn't her fault. It was just that my situation wasn't going well... It's wrong to blame others for my own mistakes.

"Well, I've chosen it."

With a slightly boastful look, she held up the headphones she bought and shook them in front of me.

"Oh, not bad."

As expected, I chose the earmuff style. Although it is a bit inconvenient to use it while lying sideways in bed, it is still suitable for use on the street in this kind of weather.

"My family gave me a lot of money today and told me to buy whatever I like. I thought I wouldn't spend it, but now it seems I was wrong."

"...Well." After all, people's shopping desires are inherently strange.

I responded softly and helped her open the door.

"If I hadn't met you, I wouldn't have had the experience I have today."

"Ah." I've had this thought for a long time. Whether I'm recalling personal experiences, reading novels, or watching anime, a story isn't just about one person. It's the encounters of two, three, or even many people that create the stories we call them.

And your life may change because of it.

"You are right..."

In fact, before she even realized it, the story between her and me was already going on. In fact, if we had never met, not only would she not have the experience she has today, but my life would also have no intersection with hers.

"If you don't meet someone, nothing will happen."

"I mean, everything that happened to me when I met you seemed to be good."

"That's not a very good assertion." I stepped onto the street and thought for a moment after hearing this. "But if you think it's a good thing, then I won't refute it."

Even those people I met didn't have a good ending... No, that wasn't the end, it was just that their intersection with me ended in a not-so-good way. Their stories continued, but I was no longer a part of them, nor was I qualified to be a bystander.

Well, let’s not think about that now.

"Okay, now that you've bought what you wanted... I'll take you somewhere else to look."

What is discussed in Chapter 34

Then let me think about what I have noticed.

"I suddenly thought of a question."

Walking down the street with Yao Qiong, holding the doll, he asked the question he wanted to confirm in a casual tone.

"Hmm? What's the problem? Is it about me?"

Generally speaking, people's natural reaction is to ask what the problem is. It seems that this applies to her as well... If even this can't open up a conversation... I might have to think of something else to talk about.

"About you, of course."

"Oh, so the question-and-answer session is still going on?" She suddenly brought up something I'd completely forgotten. I have to admit, she's quite capable of paying attention, even when she shouldn't be.

"Ah... well, sort of."

I don't really want to reveal too much about myself, especially to a girl. After all, I didn't reveal that much to Yehui and Linquanchuan. But this guy... after all, is different from everyone I know, so this kind of communication is not unacceptable.

"Hmm... I don't seem to remember the order. I'll start with you then."

This seems quite refreshing...but I don't feel happy at all.

"Okay... Actually, what I want to ask is, you didn't go to any entertainment facilities when you were a child. Like an amusement park or something."

Even though I was always under strict academic pressure, my parents would still occasionally take me to the amusement park. Now, even if my parents wanted to take me on a trip, I wouldn't leave the house.

"...I don't think I've had such an experience. After all, my parents passed away a long time ago...and I only have very few memories of what happened before."

"...Ah, sorry."

"Why are you apologizing? It's not your fault."

"Well... because I mentioned it, you recalled the relevant memories... I feel a little uneasy, but I can't relieve my anxiety, so I want to apologize."

"Hmm... Actually, you don't need to answer in such detail." After a moment's pause, she finally responded, "Ah, did you take that as my question again?"

"Isn't that what you want to ask?" I asked back in pretended surprise.

"I do want to ask... but it's not what I want to ask the most. And if I ask that, I always feel... like I'm being cheated."

Actually it is.

"Oh, never mind. If that's the case, then just continue asking questions." She didn't seem to be planning to go back on her word.

"Oh, then I'll continue asking questions."

It's a bit shameful to try to avoid answering questions about myself in this way, but I have no choice. And after all, all this is for her sake... Why do I have to be so indirect?

"Well, feel free to ask."

Maybe he just wanted to keep her in this state, and then investigate what happened to her before she realized it.

"The following topic may be difficult for you to answer... If you don't want to talk about it, you don't have to respond. Of course, this is already considered as my question, and you can continue to ask questions I want to clarify."

...Just a little bit, let's test it with a straight shot.

"It's okay. I'll answer any question, even if it's about my past. It's been so long... Even if no one brings it up, nothing will change. I'd rather someone ask, so that those memories don't become blurred with the passage of time."

"..."

Rather than mentioning something, what people fear most is perhaps forgetting it.

"So... since you're living with your adoptive parents now, does that mean they took you in immediately after your parents passed away?"

After I said this, I felt my heart beating incredibly fast. It was like confessing my feelings to a girl I'd never met before... because I wasn't sure if I should ask this question, nor did I know what her answer would be.

"That's not the case... I've already mentioned this, right? My parents died at different times... I was with my mother until after her funeral... That's when my memories became hazy, and my father died in an accident."

"Accident...? What accident? Can you tell me?"

I care a lot about this.

"Of course you can. But now it's my turn to ask questions." She was actually giving me a hint with a calm expression.

"what..."

I seem to have forgotten about this in my haste. Well, that's right, haste makes waste... While she's asking, I should think about what to ask next to get more information.

"And just now, Sheji, you asked two questions in a row, so I'll ask two too."

"How can I..."

"Now the third one. Um, you just..."

"No, no, no, that doesn't count." I quickly stopped Yao Qiong from asking all the questions one by one, "Two is two, just ask quickly."

I was careless after all... I actually felt like I was about to be outmaneuvered. It seems this guy isn't just a fool.

"Hehe~ I think I've learned this trick too."

She stuck out her pink tongue slightly and looked at me smugly, even though I was almost tricked by her.

"..." It seems that she is not really stupid.

Well, it's best not to learn this skill from me, or you'll become as unpopular as me... Speaking of which, I learned cheating pretty quickly. Sure enough, I'm putting a lot of effort into things I shouldn't be paying attention to.

"Then I'll start asking the first question."

"That doesn't need to be reiterated."

She must be showing off.

"Hmm... What was Shaji's life like as a child?"

“…”

I have to admit, this question is way too greedy. There's just so much information about childhood and life... Even if we start from elementary school and start junior high, that's six years. Not to mention all the things we experienced in between... I was just trying to figure out how to get as much information as possible with just one question... and then, the answer to the question came right out.

Just ask her like this...

“…That’s a really hard question…”

Of course, I wouldn't tell her all about my childhood experiences like a casual chat. In other words, I would just give her a brief summary and a vague answer.

"Just a part of it..."

She seemed to realize her own greed, so she quickly added.

"Actually, I just want to know what kind of experiences my peers had when they were my age... After all, I can't remember what I did back then... But maybe after hearing about your experience, I'll think of something..."

"That's it..."

Now that she said that...

"Then I have a lot to say." I took a deep breath, calmed myself down, and said to her, "If you don't have patience, feel free to interrupt me."

"...Don't worry, I will listen carefully."

It would be good if we do it this way

What kind of person am I, and what kind of life do I lead? This is a question I've pondered for a long time, and I have different judgments about myself at different stages of my life.

Though different, they were the real me—as it should be. Yet, I had a vague feeling that what I thought was the past wasn't actually "real." In other words, due to the limitations of my own cognitive and memory abilities at different stages, recounting every detail of the past was impossible. Furthermore, someone else might remember something completely different.

"When I was a kid..."

But even so, I just need to tell her what I think the past was like. After all, she doesn't want to hear any specific information. From what I understand, she probably just wants to hear stories, stories about me.

"Hmm, when should we start... Well, let's start in elementary school."

Constantly recalling my previous memories, I began to convert them into words and tell them to Yao Qiong beside me.

I don't think I've ever actively spoken these words to anyone. As someone who, in the eyes of others, lives a relatively normal life, the things I've experienced must have been quite dull and uninteresting. And it's not limited to others; even I view myself this way... The events I've experienced almost always share similarities with others. And if others have experienced them, then they can't really be called stories.

To be honest, I can only use normal things to evaluate it. But for her, the so-called normal is not a specific concept, and what she is interested in must be the fairly normal experiences I have had.

So, even though I've realized my past wasn't all that ordinary, I can still fulfill her wish. Troubles should be left to one's own devices.

"...When I was little, I not only loved games, but I also really enjoyed the animations on TV..."

Well, no matter what the past was like, let me immerse myself briefly in memories that are hard to tell whether they are real or imaginary.

Chapter 35: It's fine if it goes on like this

It is impossible to comment on what people will do when they are bored unless the situation is correct.

If it were me, if I knew that there was a biting cold wind howling outside the window, I would never step out of the house unless there was a special situation such as going to school.

Yet, there were people walking the streets and enjoying the rides, braving the freezing cold. While there were fewer people than in other seasons, there were still others besides us... I couldn't imagine there were other people in the world experiencing the same thing as Yao Qiong.

So I can roughly confirm that they are too idle at home, so they choose to increase the turnover of the facility in this kind of weather.

Well, of course. In other people's eyes, we're probably just as boring as them...

At this point, I couldn't help but glance at the person beside me. Incidentally, I was still in the middle of my narration, and she didn't seem to be paying attention to the distance we were taking. It seemed as if she was imagining what I was saying... Well, I have to say, this felt pretty good. There weren't many people who would listen to me quietly...

Although Ye Hui would listen to whatever I said, bringing up such trivial matters with her... well, I was still too embarrassed to bring it up. Perhaps it was because Yao Qiong and I weren't familiar enough that I could talk to her about myself so casually... and I could try to understand her with a normal heart.

"Don't you think time flies?"

When we were near the gate of the amusement park, I slowly stopped, and she also stopped with some doubts.

"Time? What time do you mean..."

“Is this the second question?”

"Well...Auntie...I guess so."

"Well...it's nothing, actually. As the name suggests, time knows no categories. Before I knew it, I'd already graduated from junior high to high school, and now I've become someone else's senior...but I still feel like I haven't taken the first step yet."

The time I was just standing there was already pushed far into the future by life. Whether I wanted to or not, this is how life is.