I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

"Hey, what are you doing? Hurry up and catch up!" When she realized that I was not following her, she stopped suddenly and looked back at me, her golden hair fluttering as if reflecting the light projected from the sky.

"We've already wasted a lot of time! Hurry up!"

“..........!”

I always feel a strong sense of familiarity, but it's like there's a thin layer of paper between us, and I still can't recall what I've always cared about.

Strange, has she ever given me this feeling before...

"Well...that's it."

I sighed and habitually put my hand to my hair, wanting to scratch it, but it felt uncomfortably warm. It seemed like black hair absorbed heat... As I thought about this, I noticed that Ayano had blonde hair.

If I touch her head to confirm, will she think I'm crazy?

"Well... forget it."

I gave up this sudden thought. If what she just said was true, I might have started to care about her.

"How is this possible?"

Mumbling to myself, I rode out into the sunlight once again.

...How much longer will we have to advance in this weather?

Are you sure you're not stalling?

How much longer will we have to keep going in this weather?

On that still windless afternoon, he was still walking on the country path and couldn't help but wonder if he wouldn't have had to work so hard if he hadn't agreed to accompany him.

However, there are no ifs in the world. Even though he felt extremely tired and bored, he still followed the figure in front of him, just because of the previous agreement. At this moment, he suddenly noticed that the surroundings began to appear, which he had never seen before.

The boredom was slightly alleviated. He didn't know why he suddenly had this feeling.

"By the way, do you like history?"

The guy in front suddenly turned around and asked. Although it was unclear why he suddenly asked this question, he still responded according to his own situation.

"I wouldn't say I like it, but I don't hate it either."

For him, it was enough to memorize what was in the textbook to pass the exam, and he didn't need to care about other aspects at all. And even if he cared, the teacher wouldn't say much. Guys at that age were like that, they didn't like to say anything more.

"That's too vague... I don't really like that statement."

"...But I've always been like this."

"Haven't you noticed? People generally respond to a lot of things with words like 'almost' or 'so-so'. However, in my opinion, these words are just covering up facts that they don't want to accept. They are just deceiving themselves."

Another soliloquy. He thought with a slight annoyance, but still didn't offer a rebuttal... perhaps because he didn't know how to refute it.

"Are you saying... am I lying to myself?"

The dissatisfaction was clearly evident in his tone.

"...You didn't say anything like that just now. Judging from your tone, I think you really don't understand." He laughed. "You seem to be like this all the time."

There was that smile again.

It didn't look uncomfortable, rather it was a rather endearing expression. Yet, to him, there was something indescribably subtle about it... perhaps that smile wasn't genuine. He made a haphazard judgment.

"What about you? Are you interested in history?"

Her gaze turned to him.

"Who knows..."

"....Hello..."

A worthless answer. It shouldn't even be considered an answer.

"Ah, if you're asking me if I like history, then I can tell you that I do. However, what's in the textbooks doesn't represent real history... Ah, that's hard to understand, isn't it?"

"...This isn't that hard to understand anymore."

I simply don't understand it at all, he thought silently.

"And I'm going to check it out now... Maybe you and I will know in due time."

"Hmm? Clear...clear about what?"

After leaving behind words that sounded like a suspense, the guy in front of him quickened his pace.

Episode 6

"...Are you sure this is the location marked on the map?"

If I get a positive answer, then I will start to doubt whether there really is such a thing as coincidence in the world.

"Of course not."

He actually admitted it so readily... I was surprised by how straightforward he was. And if it wasn't a map mark, then why did they come to a place like this... Speaking of which, it's a rather tricky place.

"Didn't you say you wanted to go on a date with me? So what's wrong with coming here?" She looked at me nonchalantly. "Summer vacation is still long, so there's no need to rush to see everything in one day, right?"

"...Having said that, when did I ever say I wanted to go out with you?" It's not impossible, but I would never say it so directly.

"That's what you mean. I understand without you having to tell me."

"...What the hell is going on..."

Don't take my intentions for granted...

"You're too talkative. You're really not like a man." She said with a frown.

"...I rarely talk at all, okay?"

"Okay, okay, take the camera out of my backpack." She pointed to the two backpacks behind me, one of which was hers.

"...Now? Do we have to record a place like this? This isn't even a marked location. Is it really necessary to record it?"

I was full of doubts and hesitated whether to follow her words.

"I have my own plans, so don't doubt it and just take it out quickly."

The voice sounded unquestionable.

“…”

.............

What exactly went wrong?

Holding the camera in my left hand, I followed her and filmed, while at the same time wiping the sweat from my forehead with my right hand.

Is the problem with me, Lingcan, or the world I live in? I have never heard of a date where the man uses a handheld camera to record the woman's every move. I have only heard of one similar incident, that of stalking and secretly filming.

Now, to others, I look like a stalker who's been exposed to everyone. I don't even admit that I'm dating.

"Well..."

The camera suddenly shook because a passerby bumped my shoulder while I was daydreaming. Even in the summer, the amusement park's attendance doesn't decrease much... It seems that people in this city really don't have many entertainment venues.

"Oh, sorry..."

Anyway, apologize first.

“It’s okay, it’s okay…”

"Hey! Sheji, what are you doing? Hurry up and catch up!"

The camera suddenly turned from various faces, and finally found the target that was filmed at the beginning but then lost for a long time for some reason...a blonde girl named Lingcan. Now she was waving her hands and shouting towards this side. This action aroused the curiosity of people outside the camera. The picture that originally did not include many irrelevant people suddenly showed many passers-by looking towards this side.

"Uh..."

I closed the camera for the moment.

"...Okay, okay, stop running around."

In order to avoid being noticed by everyone, I had to quickly walk up to her and tap her head gently.

"It's obviously you who didn't keep up."

She retorted somewhat dissatisfiedly.

"...There's video evidence. You just walked in and then disappeared from view with the crowd in the blink of an eye. Are you an elementary school student who has never been to an amusement park?"

"Well, forget it this time. Next time, you must make sure the camera captures me properly." It seemed like he was trying to change the subject in a rude way. Although I saw through it, I decided not to expose it.

"Okay...I understand."

I said as I turned on the camera again, bringing her face onto the screen.

It's really hard to take good photos in this kind of sunlight. Plus, with people staring at me curiously, even the thickest skinned person would still feel uncomfortable... What kind of date is this?

"Follow me closely."

As she spoke, she took my right hand, and the soft and delicate touch was instantly reflected in my hand.

"..."

However, the camera didn't capture the scene of them holding hands. It's better not to keep this scene... For some reason, I focused the camera on her face, which was not far from me.

"Look, your palms are sweaty."

“Because the weather is hot~”

After her smooth blonde hair fluttered, a bright smile appeared in front of me and the camera.

For some reason... the thought "It's great to be able to take this picture" suddenly occurred to me.

..............

I take that thought back.

I was about to put down my camera and sit outside the attraction, quietly watching the others having fun. However, the words "Entrants, please find your own vehicles..." that had just echoed in my ears made it clear that escaping was impossible.

"Hey, Sheji, you have to take a good picture of me."

Lingcan gave instructions while gripping the bumper car steering wheel tightly.

"There's no way we can get a good shot under these circumstances, right?"

Holding the edge tightly with my right hand, I nervously retorted, "What on earth are you thinking? Someone who doesn't know would think we're doing an outdoor live broadcast."

"Oh, that sounds interesting."

"It's not funny at all." Who wants to see a weird-looking guy yelling and screaming in a very contrived way?

"Let's get started!"

"Hey, wait a minute..."

Then the picture began to shake violently.

. . . .

"Hmm... That guy's expression is pretty cool. I really want to know what he was thinking. Wow, he looks so nervous, isn't he? Hey, Shaji, take a look, this is from the footage you filmed~"

Sitting on a bench, watching the video she had just recorded on a small screen, Lingcan excitedly patted my back as I sat next to her, and urged me to watch it with her.

"Ah good..."

I was so focused on keeping my left hand from dropping the camera that I had no time to think about what I was actually recording. And thinking back to that time, Lingcan didn't seem to be worried about his camera falling to the ground and being smashed by other cars due to his acceleration, and he continued to rush around recklessly.

"...Just have fun..."

This is what I'm saying from the bottom of my heart. For me, what I'm doing now isn't what I want to do, so naturally, I can't say I'm happy or sad. However, if just being with her makes her happy, then so be it... At least until she gets her summer homework, I'll keep messing around with her.

"...But, he said he'd take a picture of you, but he gave the camera to someone else. This photographer seems a bit incompetent." I scratched my cheek. "But think about it, I'm sitting right next to you. I can't get a good shot from that angle, right? It's such a shame."

"There's nothing to regret, as long as I can record it." After playing, she handed the camera to me again and stood up neatly. "Next, I'll trouble you to take a good picture of it~"

“…Okay, okay…”

He sighed helplessly, then stood up right after her.

"So, where to go next?"

"let me see..."

She said as she pulled out the plan of the playground.