I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

Imbalance and nothingness

"People always say that people flaunt what they lack. Actually, I don't really agree with this statement, because only when you actually possess something do you have the capital to show off. People who say this are probably just trying to cover up their envy."

After a brief silence, I was looked at with a somewhat timid gaze.

"I always feel... a bit like you, Xiaoyu."

"...Well."

This is the truth. Even if you don't want to admit it, you can't escape the fact... Finding all kinds of excuses is just to cover up your own incompetence.

"But these are no big deal to me."

"......"

"Look, there are so many people in this world. How could there not be someone stronger than you? And the emotions that arise from such people, whether it's envy or jealousy... are perfectly normal, and even quite precious."

"...precious? Why do you say that?"

Jealousy of others...

"This also means that you're not willing to accept this, right? When you see someone who's superior, it's normal to want to surpass them, right? So there's no need to hide such feelings."

Is there no need to hide...

"But what can I do..."

Even if I didn't hide my inner self, what could I possibly do? I had absolutely no special qualities, no special abilities. Even if I wanted to become a bird soaring in the sky, I was still nothing more than a creeping insect on the ground.

"I'm not good at anything at all."

Even if he claims to be good at a game, he still loses to others. He can't be called a "high-level player" at all, let alone a legend like "".

"Even...even the games..."

I lowered my head.

Was it because of shame... or some other reason... Anyway, my gaze slowly shifted away from her face and looked at the floor made of red and blue plastic blocks beside her.

"Cough cough!"

Before I could finish my words, she suddenly started coughing. The deliberate sound piqued my curiosity, and I stopped what I was about to say.

"If you really can't find any answers..."

I could feel her moving closer to me.

"How about asking the leader of the Cooperation Club for a favor? The helpful leader wouldn't mind helping you find a skill you're good at."

"......"

Is she serious?

Chapter 27: Imbalance and Nothingness

When people eat, they never think about why they eat, just as few people care why they are alive.

There's a saying that goes, "get used to it," and it's a perfect description of this phenomenon. When something happens too often, people can't help but get used to it. But what about the opposite?

The reason why people find something new is because something new suddenly appears in the things they are used to. In fact, it is not because the new thing is so good, but because we are already used to the things in front of us, so we naturally tend to approach new things instinctively.

"I know she's not annoying." I responded to Ye Jin's words.

This kind of thing is taken for granted. Normally, when I mention it, I can still pick up the meat slices and spread them flat on the hot iron plate.

"Even if you meet a stranger on the street and greet you with a smile under normal circumstances, even if you don't respond and just walk past him out of caution, you won't have the urge to beat him up."

"...What kind of example is this? It seems real."

Perhaps because the description was too specific, Ye Jin began to doubt the authenticity of the story.

"Are you talking about the incident where you mistook someone for someone on the street?"

"No. How could I possibly find time to look at passersby while I'm walking down the street?"

Generally speaking, it's just distraction.

"Oh, I forgot you usually don't leave the house, sorry~"

No apology at all.

"Well..." I didn't care. "What I mean is, gentleness is like a smile. When you show it to others indiscriminately, even if no one really cares, no one will dislike the person who shows gentleness."

If I explain it this way, she might understand.

"That makes some sense." Ye Jin nodded. "In other words, since girls don't mind confessions and rings, you can use them to date multiple men, right?"

"I didn't say that."

This guy is really good at misinterpretation.

"But what you just said was completely...how should I put it?" Her attention was drawn to the meat slices halfway through her words.

"...In that case, let's eat first."

I picked up the roasted meat and put it in her bowl, and she ate it without any hesitation, without even saying thank you.

"No...hmm...why are you sucking~"

She couldn't wait to continue the conversation before she even swallowed the food in her mouth.

"Can you swallow your food before you talk?"

Looking at her like this, I always feel like I skipped the infancy and raised a daughter directly. This little girl in front of me is not at all worry-free.

"In my opinion, making someone feel gentle is much more complicated than just smiling at them, and the degree of importance is certainly different." She stretched out her finger and placed one of the chopsticks on it. "If you insist on comparing the two... I think there will be an imbalance."

I initially didn't want to respond to her seemingly naive way of explaining things, but because she was demonstrating her so-called "unbalance," she deliberately placed the fulcrum slightly to the left of the center of the chopsticks. As soon as she finished speaking, the chopsticks on her fingers fell to the ground.

"what..."

"hehe."

"Please ask the waiter to bring another pair of chopsticks," she suggested.

"...Okay." I was about to stand up and call for help.

So why do we have to demonstrate it like that?

"Add a plate of meat too," she suggested again.

"Hey!"

. . . . . . .

"Ahem, anyway, imbalance..."

Just like turning the pages of a book or switching cameras, she completely ignored what had just happened and continued with her unfinished words.

"Come again..."

"In my opinion, the importance of making others feel gentle is like greeting each other between family members, but for people who have no previous connection, it is undoubtedly similar to kissing."

"...It's not that serious."

"No, no, brother, you can tell from the fact that you haven't played enough games... I mean, galgames, you haven't played enough." She immediately acted like an expert, which made me suspect that she had actually studied White Album.

"I admit that, but why would you play that?"

How should I put it...experiencing love in a game feels a bit pitiful.

"Ah, that's not important."

Is this considered avoidance?

"..."

"In short, the male protagonists in these games are almost always gentle, and this attitude can inadvertently attract the female protagonist, thus increasing their favorability." She sighed, "Although there are certain differences between reality and games, for example, you're not as handsome as the male protagonist, you don't speak as nicely as others, and you don't have any friends, so asking you to work there always seems unlikely..."

"Please stop the personal attacks."

I didn't want to lose my temper while we were eating.

"But games, as a form of art, are of course derived from real life. So if you're too gentle with others, especially the opposite sex, and you don't have any thoughts, it's not good for either of you."

"..."

Of course I know about this kind of thing. And it's precisely because this kind of thing happened to me that I chose to do this... I want to give up all those troublesome things before I figure it out.

“Sizzle—”

The meat slices being roasted under high temperature still emit an eye-catching sound and aroma.

“…Let’s not talk about this…”

I know what I want to do.

"Let's eat first."

So I ended the topic first.

..............

"Please don't joke."

Regarding Tongyou's proposal, I felt like she had just come up with it, with no plan or feasibility at all. So even if she said it seriously, it seemed like a joke to me.

"I'm not kidding. Since you can't find the answer on your own, maybe I can help you."

"You're not kidding! How can you be sure you can help me?" Suddenly, I felt... inexplicably excited. My body tilted slightly, as if any more stimulation would cause me to stand up suddenly.

"Then you're not sure I can't help you, right?"

She didn't react to my attitude.

"...You're just messing around, right?"

"It's like this, do you have any other plans?"

"...no plans."

This question left me speechless.

"Since you don't have any, then just accompany me and mess around~"

"How is that possible! You said it yourself that it was nonsense."

What the hell is going on... She suddenly showed this attitude. It's like she's deliberately trying to piss me off.

"What if we find it because of this?"

"It's impossible!"

"That's because you haven't even thought about it before. You've just been denying yourself. In fact, you haven't even tried."

"......"

"...What if we can't find it?"

For some reason, even though I had no room to object, my heart resisted this suggestion.

"You can't find it by yourself anyway, so one more person won't matter, right?" She laughed, seemingly unconcerned. "But if I do find my target, you'll also benefit. That's a guaranteed win, right?"

"..."

"I beg to differ...I'm going back."

Want to escape.

I was terrified by the sudden surge of emotion within me. Perhaps if I escaped from here... I could slowly recover.

Thinking of this, I stood up suddenly.

"Hey, wait a minute! I haven't finished what I'm saying yet!"

Seeing this, she tried to stop me, but I didn't know what method she had in mind for stopping someone. Anyway, my left hand was grabbed, and then a joint twisted, forcing me to turn towards her.

“It hurts, it hurts, it hurts—what are you doing!”

This time I was really angry.

"It's strange."

After letting go of my hand, the distance between me and her was very close, almost face to face.

"It obviously won't do you any harm, so why don't you agree to it?" She said as she moved closer to me, and I couldn't help but take a step back.