Who would study psychology if they didn't have some kind of problem?

Chapter 441 Erikson's Theory of Personality Development
"It's the same at night. I want to sleep alone too. But whenever I bring it up, she gets very upset. Seeing her like that makes me feel bad too..."

After saying this, the visitor briefly immersed himself in his emotions for a few seconds.

But then it suddenly breaks free, as if to defend something, declare something, or explain something.

“But Teacher Nan, my mother really had a tough time. She didn’t have much education and didn’t have much of her own opinion. In those days, she got divorced and raised me alone. You could even say that she cut herself out of social life for my sake.”

“I’ve always felt sorry for her, which is why I didn’t want to leave her when I was in college, and I’m still taking care of her now.”

The visitor raised her voice slightly: "She's not a bad mother. She's never hit me, almost never said anything harsh to me, never said anything about favoring boys over girls, and never said I had to pay for her or anything like that. I know she came to Beidu because she was worried about me and wanted to take care of me..."

"So, sometimes I think..."

Her voice trailed off again: "Teacher Nan, were my... negative feelings towards my mother too 'unfilial'?"

Is this way of thinking really reasonable?

"Is it really... possible?"

……

It is reasonable and feasible.

Nan Zhuren thought to himself.

However, he didn't offer any immediate support, which is a waste of his level of "support" in this situation.

Anyone who has read about a million words of psychology-related books and even novels should be able to tell what the visitor is thinking right now.

This is a cognitive issue.

So, how should we intervene in this visitor's cognitive problems?
Nan Zhuren straightened his posture.

Different visitors require different approaches.

Although Lin Xi in front of me used some regressive language in the story I just told that was not appropriate for her age, I still felt a sense of "regression".

However, objectively speaking, the other party was a highly educated and knowledgeable visitor.

Nan Zhuren prefers this type of visitor.

When faced with visitors who have a certain level of knowledge, Nan Zhuren can provide analysis and viewpoints directly, without resorting to roundabout ways to express himself in a way that the other party can understand.

He can even communicate with the other party directly using specific psychological theories.

Nan Zhuren's pupils were slightly unfocused for a moment. With the boost of the "flow state," he completed the arrangement and combination of the client's information in less than two seconds, while simultaneously planning the phased goals of the consultation in his mind.

He glanced at the wall clock without making it obvious.

A lot of time has passed.

Today's task is to help visitors clarify their current problems, accept their emotions, and provide them with the motivation to change themselves.

Even if it's a success.

We can't rush it. After all, while highly educated people can grasp knowledge quickly, they also have a fairly solid understanding system of their own.

We must make an impact, but we cannot make too much of a rush at once.

To avoid it crashing completely.

Fortunately, the visitor in front of me was only in his thirties and had come to seek help on his own initiative.

You can start by introducing something new, new knowledge, and gradually let it seep in, allowing her to absorb it and change.

This client is only here for their first consultation, and it's uncertain whether this can develop into a long-term case.

Although Nan Zhuren was confident that she could keep the client, treating each consultation as if it were the last, and ensuring a complete consultation experience, is an important professional concept that a counselor needs to have.

...I made up my mind.

Nan Zhuren found the most suitable theoretical foundation for current application in his own reserves.

Seeing that the visitor had let down their guard, their eyes revealed a yearning that was no longer concealed by any avoidance or defense.

Nan Zhuren organized her thoughts: "Teacher Lin, before seeking help from psychological counseling, did you try to learn some relevant psychological knowledge on your own?"

Sure enough, the visitor nodded: "Yes... A little earlier, I was thinking about whether I could relax by reading or something."

This is the first reaction typical of groups that excel at self-learning.

"But most of the things I found were things like hypnosis and meditation, all superstitious stuff."

The visitor frowned: "Then there are some motivational quotes or unrealistic, grandiose statements... that's why I came to seek counseling."

Yes, that's a common tactic used online to deceive people with psychological themes.

Hypnosis and meditation are not mystical—but Nan Zhuren certainly wouldn't argue with his clients about this at this time.

Looking into the visitor's eyes, Nan Zhuren asked, "Have you ever read Erikson's 'Eight Stages of Personality Development'?"

"The Eight Stages of Personality Development Theory?" The visitor looked confused.

Then he shook his head.

Erik Homburger Erikson is one of the leading figures in psychoanalysis.

He was deeply influenced by Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis, and made many innovations based on Freud's theories, the most well-known of which is the "Theory of Personality Development." Because this theory divides a person's personality development into eight stages, it is also called the "Eight Stages of Personality Development Theory."

In this theory, Erikson believed that a person's life goes through eight specific developmental stages, each with a pair of major psychological conflicts that need to be overcome. Individuals need to achieve a balance between these conflicts and develop specific "fundamental qualities" or "virtues" in order to successfully enter the next stage.

Successfully resolving a crisis can lead to a healthy personality and positive qualities in an individual; however, failure to resolve a crisis may result in maladaptive behavior and negative outcomes, affecting subsequent life development.

The stages are divided according to age.

The first stage is infancy. During this stage, individuals need to overcome 'doubt' to gain 'trust', and need to confirm the reliability of the world and the dependability of their loved ones. If this trust issue cannot be resolved, the individual will suffer from extreme insecurity in future development and will often be trapped in fear and anxiety.

The second stage is childhood. During this stage, individuals need to acquire autonomy, overcome shyness, and learn independence and self-control. If this willpower is not developed during this stage, future development will often lead to over-reliance on others and frequent self-doubt.

The third stage is the preschool period. During this stage, individuals need to gain initiative, be able to explore independently, set goals for themselves, and learn to take responsibility. Failure at this stage may lead to a fear of trying new things and exploring in the future.

The fourth stage is the school-age period. During this stage, individuals need to develop a sense of diligence, gaining a sense of accomplishment and improved abilities through work and study. Failure may lead to persistent feelings of inferiority and incompetence later in life.

Nan Zhuren explained to the visitors one by one.

"Let's leave aside the process of these four stages for now. Your main problem lies in the fifth stage—"

Lin Xi swallowed hard and looked at Nan Zhuren.

"The fifth stage, adolescence, is roughly between the ages of 12 and 18. During this stage, individuals need to acquire what is known as 'self-identity,' clarify their 'roles,' and begin to have general plans for the future. If successful, they can obtain a clear and stable self-identity."

The counselor and the client looked at each other: "And if we fail—the most typical problems are role confusion and feeling lost."

(P.S.: Be sure to read the notes in the "Author's Note" section when looking at the images.)
　Due to space limitations, it is not possible to explain each of the eight stages in detail. Instead, I have created a simple Word document and presented screenshots as images for interested readers.

　　However, the images are quite simple; readers who are really interested can search for them online.

　　[Note 1: Due to translation issues, there may be slight differences in naming conventions across different versions in online resources.]

　　[Note 2: Due to social development, the age at which people enter each stage has changed. For example, children who start learning early will enter school age earlier, and precocious children will enter puberty earlier.]

　　[Note 3: Same as Note 2, since this theory was proposed in the last century and is based on an American context, it should be used for reference only and not regarded as gospel.]

　　This article will only elaborate on the content related to [adolescence].

　　
　
(End of this chapter)