I Alone Am Immortal: My Rebirth and Leisurely Cultivation

Chapter 309 Whoever gets close first loses
"Why are you telling me this now?"

Jiang Yingzhu sighed again, but she still had to do her homework.

He looked so pitiful that Li Yan wanted to give him first place.

But after thinking about it, I decided to give up.

Doesn't that mean he's going to suffer?

Li Yan simply wanted to experience the beauty of youth on campus, not the pain.

Homework and tutoring are both sources of suffering.

However, for some students, there is also pressure from their parents.

"So, what do you think? I'll take you out for fun in July."

“No problem,” Jiang Yingzhu said, followed closely by Mengmeng. Li Yan had already expressed his opinion earlier.

After the two-day holiday for the college entrance examination, just as Jiang Yingzhu had expected, classes were held on Saturday and Sunday after Friday.

In addition, there are evening self-study sessions.

After half a day of feeling awkward, Jiang Yingzhu quickly adjusted.

Li Yan observed that Mei Mengqian was actually reluctant to attend classes on weekends, but she hid it very well.

After all, weekends have long been a time for fun.

This has become a subconscious rule.

Li Yan stroked his chin, as if he had finally found the reason behind the many calls for a two-day weekend in his previous life?

He shook his head, glanced at the biology teacher who was giving a lecture, and then turned his attention to Yang Xiong.

Zhu Gelin was passing notes to Yang Xiong.

"You haven't done anything yet? I've already given you the money. Fraud is illegal; a thousand yuan is enough to warrant a criminal case!"

"Don't worry, I've already investigated and found out." Zhu Gelin reassured Yang Xiong, glancing at Liang Xueyi in the front row.

“I have already investigated Liang Xueyi’s situation. Her reputation in your class is not good because of you, so if I approach her, I have a good chance of succeeding.”

"Then why aren't you getting closer!" Yang Xiong urged.

"No, whoever gets close first loses."

"?"

"In a game between men and women, if you make the first move, you lose the initiative. I have to wait for the other person to come to me first."

Upon seeing this response, Yang Xiong turned and glared at Zhu Gelin.

"You're kidding me! What if she doesn't contact you for three years? Call the police!"

"No, no, no! Let me finish what I have to say." Zhu Gelin said anxiously, "I've checked. Liang Xueyi likes people with high scores and good grades. She uses them to improve her weaknesses."

"If I improve my grades, I can attract her to me just like you did back then."

"so."

"So the opportunity comes during the final exams. After the exams, we'll change seats, and I need to cram for the exams during that time."

The two were talking rather loudly, and biology teacher Li Junlong frowned, his gaze falling on Zhu Gelin.

"Zhu Gelin, you answer this question: the location of the spasm junction ___."

"bed."

Zhu Gelin realized something was wrong as soon as he finished speaking, but it was too late.

The laughter that erupted from all directions completely drowned out his words of correction.

"Hahaha, I'm dying of laughter! What the hell is this bed?!"

"Couldn't it be a sink, bro?"

"It's a bit perverted, but I like trams."

Li Junlong was amused, but then his face darkened slightly when he heard several boys making lewd jokes.

But you can't show it yet, because if you do, it means he understands.

So here's the question: how did Guang Weizheng's teacher understand it?
"Stand back!"

Li Junlong established his authority by using Zhu Gelin, while Yang Xiong was utterly disheartened.

No way, with that kind of intelligence, you think you can attract people with grades?
Li Junlong quickly skipped the question and continued the lecture.

He nodded as he looked at the students in his class who had perked up.

But suddenly, he noticed that in the classroom where the sound had subsided, he could faintly hear geese calling.

Li Junlong frowned again, and as he listened to the approaching voice, he scolded:
"Quiet down and listen to the lesson! What's going on? Why is someone imitating a goose?! Is this how you teach biology?!"

As he spoke, Li Junlong had already spotted Chen Chenchen, who was sitting in the first row of the middle group right below his podium.

At this moment, Chen Chenchen was covering her mouth, her shoulders trembling, while Wu Wuwu, who sat next to her, was covering her forehead, and Ling Ningshan looked on with curiosity.

"Chen Chenchen, why are you imitating a goose's quack!"

When Li Junlong asked such a serious question, Chen Chenchen stopped covering her mouth and let out a laugh that sounded like a goose's quack.

"Goose, goose, goose, goose~~~~~~~"

"Teacher, I didn't mean to. I have a low threshold for laughter and I couldn't help it. Hehehe, teacher, you're so funny. Zhu Gelin is funny too."

In the past, when she couldn't help but laugh during class, she would eat the dried bitter melon she brought with her. The bitterness in her mouth would make her not want to laugh anymore.

But who knew that the school was having extra classes and they ran out of dried bitter melon, and she hadn't had time to go back and get more.

And she had almost held back just now, but who knew Li Junlong was saying someone was imitating a goose's call somewhere.

She found it funny to think that she sounded like a goose.

Considering this is a biology class, it's not wrong for her to use the biology name, which makes it even funnier!

She couldn't help but feel even more complacent when she thought about how the biology teacher would use chicken language and the students would respond in the form of various animals.

"Cough cough cough, hee hee hee, teacher, I really didn't mean it, you're so funny."

After being called funny twice in a row, and with the female student's surreal laughter still ringing in his ears, Li Junlong's face turned completely black.

"Stand outside!"

Ten minutes later, the honking of geese outside grew louder, and could be heard throughout the entire corridor.

A series of low laughs echoed in the classroom. Li Junlong, with a dark expression, invited Chen Chenchen back in and made her stand at the back facing the wall.

In the row, Ling Ningshan asked Wu Wuwu curiously.

"Does Chenchen always laugh this much?" "Yes, she has a very low threshold for laughter, and sometimes she'll laugh for no reason."

Wu Wuwu nodded, "When we first started living in the dormitory, she would sometimes burst out laughing for no reason in the middle of the night, especially when she went to the toilet, it was terrifying."

"It got much better after I explained it to them."

Ling Ningshan nodded thoughtfully.

"Now that you mention it, I've seen her suddenly act like this before, which is kind of funny."

Wu Wuwu's lips twitched slightly. "That's right, she usually keeps dried bitter melon on hand to weigh it down."

She gave a thumbs-up, her face full of admiration and respect, "Chenchen is very hardworking!"

“Suffering is bad,” Li Yan interjected from behind, “If you like suffering, you’ll have endless suffering.”

Upon hearing this, the group felt that what he said made sense, but when applied to Chen Chenchen, it became inexplicably funny.

Saturday is for making up Wednesday's classes. After a biology class full of literary elements, it's time for the formal Chinese class.

After the break, Li Ping stood on the podium and his first words were...

"I heard that a classmate in our class recited 'goose, goose, goose' for half an hour last class. Stand up and let me listen."

Chen Chenchen stood up, her face slightly flushed, and lowered her head.

"Chen Chenchen, it's you carrying the goose on your back."

"Teacher, I can't help it."

"Then why do you think the biology teacher is being funny?"

Chen Chenchen lowered her head and glanced at Li Ping's expression. "I just thought of some funny things and thought he was funny, so I didn't realize I was saying it out loud."

"Okay, watch your words from now on. When you're in class, you should act like you're in class. If you want to laugh, try to hold it in."

Chen Chenchen nodded, then glanced at Li Ping and noticed that he was only slightly taller than her when he stood on the platform. She estimated that he would be about the same height as her when he came down.

She burst out laughing, probably because her true nature had been unleashed and she no longer suppressed it.

"Teacher, you're so short."

"Fuck!"

Wu Wuwu lay on the table. She knew that her best friend had laughed several times because of Li Ping's height, but she had always suppressed it with bitter melon.

I didn't expect that Xiao would choose it this time, and even say it out loud.

Wu Wuwu could no longer imagine what her best friend would face.

Gan Tiantian, sitting next to her, was very surprised.

"No, is she really that brave?"

Even if some things are true, it's wrong of you to say them out loud.

Sure enough, Li Ping dragged Chen Chenchen out with a dark face and criticized her for all her exam scores.

"Laugh, laugh, laugh! With a score like this, anyone who didn't know better would think a gorilla from a tree came down to do it!"

The reprimands echoed through the door into the classroom, and the students immediately fell silent, feeling the reprimands as if they were being scolded, and dared not make any small movements.

Not long after, Chen Chenchen came in with red eyes.

Li Ping got tired of writing and went back to his office, seemingly to have some tea.

"It seems Li Ping and Bitter Gourd are on the same level," Li Yan said.

"Stop gloating, class monitor." Wu Wuwu said as she turned around, then took the opportunity to pat her friend on the shoulder.

"Chenchen, why don't you call your mom at noon and ask her to bring some dried bitter melon over?"

"This is the only way." Chen Chenchen didn't expect that she would lose control in less than half a day.

"If only there were a way to make the jokes more funny."

Upon hearing this, Chen Xiyuan, who was sitting nearby, looked over and said:

"A low threshold for laughter is essentially a high sensitivity to superficial jokes, so you need to improve your sensitivity."

"Read more books, observe life, learn to speak with humor, and broaden your horizons. Then, ordinary jokes won't be worth laughing at."

"That makes a lot of sense." Chen Chenchen nodded, looked at Chen Xiyuan, and suddenly smiled.

The sudden laugh caught Chen Xiyuan off guard and startled him, and then he heard a sound.

"Thank you, Zhizhixing!"

Chen Xiyuan's face darkened immediately. He turned around and began to work hard on his practice problems.

"Zhuzhu, your sense of humor is definitely not as high as mine!"

Jiang Yingzhu felt a poke in her back, and then she heard Yu Bing's childish voice.

"Tch, anyone can brag."

"I'm a professional, nothing can make me laugh," Jiang Yingzhu said coldly.

"Do you know why people die wherever Conan goes?" Li Yan suddenly asked.

"Why?" Jiang Yingzhu and the other girls around her looked on.

"Because he is a little boy."

Upon hearing this, the group paused for a moment. Mei Mengqian pursed her lips, and then Yu Qingya burst out laughing.

"Class monitor, this is just too hellish."

Yu Bing and Jiang Yingzhu also realized what was happening and burst into laughter at the same time.

The next moment, Li Yan pointed at them.

"They're even, so there's no need for you to compare them; they're all the same."

"No, I just couldn't help it. If you tell me another one, I definitely won't laugh," Yu Bing said.

"That's right, you attacked me from behind."

So Li Yan told two more stories, and this time, prepared, neither of them laughed.

"It's alright, smiles accumulate over time, let's see who can hold back."

Suddenly, Gan Tiantian, who was in the front row, turned around and said:
"Li Yan, stop teasing them, Chen Chenchen is about to lose it."

"Oh wow, the eldest and second eldest got into a fight and killed the third eldest?!"

(End of this chapter)