I am the emotional sustenance of your deceased

There is moonlight tonight, I can go home and sleep well.

Ch163. What else can I live for?

"..."

When Su Shi opened her eyes, she found herself falling off the bed.

There was a puddle of water on the floor, which was her tears and sweat gathered together to form a pool of stagnant water.

The gray-blue eyes stared blankly at the wall in front of her. If you look closely, you will find that Nagasaki Motoyo's pupils have lost the ability to focus.

Her mind is now full of Chitose Noshiro.

Chitose…

【Thousand years old.】

【Chitose! 】

Chitose!

So painful, so uncomfortable...

Su Shi's body was shaking constantly, and he curled up into a ball like a small watermelon worm.

Now she not only has to bear the pain of a mother losing her child, but Su Shi also has to bear the sorrow of a child losing his mother... losing two mothers.

Her mother Chitose was gone, and it was all her fault, Nagasaki Suyo.

Her baby girl was gone too...and it was still her fault.

"It's all my fault, it's all my fault, it's all my fault... Ahhhhh... Someone come and scold me."

My brain is trembling! It's so painful, I really want to end my life.

Su Shi doesn't know why he is still alive.

Through the reflection of light, Su Shi saw his own face in the pool of water on the ground.

"Europe…"

It was so disgusting that she threw up immediately, but due to the stomach cramps she only coughed up some saliva.

So disgusting... That face makes me sick just by looking at it... So scary...

"So high and mighty...so disgusting, ah...what else can I live for?"

Suffering from the pain caused by the interweaving of two memories, Su Shi wanted to get up, walk to the terrace and jump down, but except for her fingers, all other parts of her body were protesting.

Her limbs were so stiff, and the coldness of the floor was far beyond her imagination.

The daughter died, and the mother died too...

It would have been fine if he had only had one of the dreams, but after both dreams ended, the super-doubled pain tortured Su Shi so much that he wanted to go crazy.

She has nothing left, haha, nothing left...

What made Su Shi want to cry the most was that the self in the dream was at least a thousand years old.

She had once possessed a thousand years! She had definitely possessed it!

I've hugged, acted coquettishly, and kissed...

But in reality!

In reality...

"I... have nothing... It's not fair... It's so unfair..."

Why should she bear the memory of herself having lived a thousand years when she has never lived a thousand years in reality?

It’s so unfair…

Why didn’t I have a 60-year-old mother who accompanied me during junior high school, and why didn’t I hug my little 60-year-old mother after she became an adult?

That's not fair! She clearly hasn't passed! Why?

why!

Why show her this?

She wanted to cry, but Su Shi's voice had already become hoarse from crying while she was dreaming.

She twisted and struggled on the floor like a maggot, and finally managed to get up with the help of the corner of the wall.

Pressing half of her face against the wall, Nagasaki Suyo forced herself to cool down her brain with the cool touch.

【I want to die, I want to die, I want to die, I want to die...】

Having possessed Chitose... having possessed Chitose twice, Nagasaki Suyo has completely understood what "love" is!

What Chitose gives to herself is called [love]!

That's the home she wants!

As for Crychic? Toyokawa Shoko?

Compared to these two extremely burning memories...what does that memory count for?

It's so sad that only the phantoms in dreams have given me that kind of pure love that is like a dream.

"Puchi, hahahahahaha… No! No, no!"

at least!

"At least I, Nagasaki Suyo... have experienced this feeling in my dreams..."

Now I think many people have never even had this kind of dream...

Won!

Already won!

Me! Woohoo…

She kept brainwashing herself to prevent herself from really becoming a trapeze artist. However, Su Shi's legs were still weak, so much so that she had to kneel down every few steps.

It was so embarrassing... But when she thought that the person in such an embarrassing situation was her, the arrogant bad mother and bad daughter... Su Shi felt surprisingly better.

Her long brown hair was soaked with sweat, and it felt like it took Su Shi an endless amount of time to walk down the stairs step by step.

"Xiao Sui...Xiao Sui..."

I envy myself in my dreams. Why is there no age in reality? Why is there no...

"and many more!"

Who says there is no Nodai Chitose in reality?

Didn’t they just pass each other on the street that day?

In reality, he is old!

In reality, he is old!

After a brief moment of ecstasy comes endless sorrow.

Su Shi found that he seemed completely...unqualified to approach Qiansui.

What is she? A scumbag daughter who didn't even see her mother for the last time during her rebellious phase? Or a bad mother who was irresponsible and didn't raise her daughter, so busy with work that she left her daughter homeless for a long time?

She... who is she...

The Chitose Noshiro she met by chance that day looked only about the same age as her, but her feelings for her were beyond her imagination.

That girl is not only her mother, but also her daughter!

Who understands! Who can understand Su Shi’s inner conflict…

Nagasaki Suyo felt like she was going crazy if she continued thinking about it, especially when she thought about how Chitose was so dedicated and responsible when she was her mother, and how Chitose was so well-behaved and sensible when she was her daughter and never caused any trouble...

Such a comparison is simply a testament to the inferiority of each other.

"What a failure... Why am I so hateful... Wuwuwuwu..."

Su Shi now understands that she didn't cherish the opportunity every time... The second dream was the last chance God gave her, but she still couldn't grasp it.

She felt so uncomfortable, especially since Su Shi, who had cried until she had no strength left, still wanted to eat something.

So after opening the refrigerator door, Nagasaki Suye's pretty face, which had been able to remain calm, suddenly became ferocious.

"Why wasn't that bowl of ginseng chicken soup in the refrigerator thrown away?"

Ginseng chicken soup... uh...

“Wuwuwuwu…”

Don’t make me remember it!

The memories of her mother taking her to drink ginseng chicken soup when she was young, and her breaking her promise not to take Xiao Sui to drink ginseng chicken soup... and her standing up her mother and not going home to drink ginseng chicken soup, and her spilling the ginseng chicken soup when she took Xiao Sui to the hospital... all burst out at this moment.

Su Shi almost couldn't breathe, her heart was about to explode, and her head was a mess...

“No… No… I…”

Su Shi felt that he needed to go to a confined space to calm down, like...

Her eyes turned to the large wardrobe not far away. It was made of wood and very sturdy.

[Mom, the only places I want to cry are in the closet and in my mother's arms!]

Qiansui's voice still lingers in Su Shi's ears.

She bit her lips until they were almost bleeding, and staggered towards the closet with her stiff and numb body.

She wanted to cry her heart out right now...but there was no mother here to give her a hug.

So, I can only go to the closet...

"Wow, wow, wow...what else can I live for..."

Ch164. Takamatsu Touma suffers from insomnia again

"Xiao Sui, why are you hiding from me?"

"Hmm? Where is this… Is this the same dream as last time?"

Noshiro Chitose opened his eyes in a daze and swallowed subconsciously, but was strangled by someone in an instant.

woo-

The feeling of suffocation is so strong, this dream doesn't seem fake.

Chitose glanced around, only a small white light above his head was struggling to shine. Outside the circle of light was a pitch-black darkness.

And the person who was strangling him...her face was also hidden in the darkness, and only her white hands could be seen clearly by Qiansui.

Wait! That sound?

"Xiao Sushi? Is that you? Xiao Sushi, why are you doing this to me?"

Now that he knew it was a dream, Chitose no longer felt any nervousness.

She even tried to be cute by tilting her head.

In the darkness, Nagasaki Suyo's ferocious face suddenly approached Chitose, but Noshiro Chitose was not afraid at all.

She even thought that the other person looked quite interesting now.

"Xiao Sui...you are not allowed to leave me...no, no, no...now I have locked you in here...you finally belong to me!"

"Yes, yes, I belong only to you."

Chitose Noshiro yawned slightly out of boredom. She felt that her behavior of falling asleep in a dream was very stupid and foolish.

"Why are you treating me so perfunctorily...why!"

"Just giving you a perfunctory treatment?" Qiansui's tone was extremely surprised, as if he had heard something unbelievable. "I didn't give you a perfunctory treatment. You're accusing me so unfairly... so you don't love me anymore? Sushi, you disappoint me so much."

"I…"

The tables have turned! Now it's Su Shi's turn to be speechless!

When Qiansui blinked again, the bad Su Shi who had strangled him had been tied up on a wooden chair, while Qiansui himself was standing in front of him, looking down at him condescendingly.