Did you masturbate today Commander?

Did you masturbate today Commander?

Author: An uncle who wants to create a fairy tale

Summary:

This is a very slow-paced work. I hope you can calm down and read it. I will try my best to describe the cute side of cats.

This is a story about a cat admiral, and a group of ignorant ship girls who are trying hard to pursue a child. Please look forward to the cat fun of this work with warm eyes.

PS: I really want to have a cat, but I can’t have one at home, so I can only write about the type of cat I want to have in this way. This is a fantasy that doesn’t exist_(:з」∠)_

Chapter 1 A historically rich beginning

The ocean is always an indispensable part of a planet with life, but not every planet with life is so peaceful. At least now there is war in the ocean of this planet.

This planet was supposed to be dominated by humans, but since some time ago, a group called "Siren" appeared from the other side of the sea, just like the Sirens in mythology. Whenever they appear, they are always accompanied by overwhelming lightning storms, and then a group of extremely oppressive black fleets. This black fleet not only has weapons that far exceed modern technology, but also has a force that humans cannot resist at this stage. No one knows where this Siren fleet came from, and no one knows why it attacked humans.

The reason seems to no longer be important, because the "war" has begun. At the beginning of the war, humans were no match for the Sirens. The battle between humans and Sirens really cannot be called a war at all. The so-called war is an act based on the fact that the strength between each other is not far apart. However, the difference in strength between humans and Sirens is not even on a few levels. It can only be said to be a one-sided massacre.

Faced with a war situation that is losing ground step by step, humans are gradually losing control of the sea. If the situation continues in this way, humans will completely lose the sea and be blocked inland, waiting for extinction.

But just when humans were at a loss, a "miracle" happened. As if the sea had listened to humans' prayers, life that inherited the name of the past battleships was born from the sea. This wonderful life form appeared in front of the world in the form of a female, as if it had gathered all the beauty in the world in one body. At least that beauty is absolutely beyond the reach of ordinary humans. These incredible girls operated incomprehensible "ship suits" and stopped on the sea, fighting off the Sirens who were defeating humans step by step.

Here, humans finally saw a glimmer of hope and raised the banner of resistance against the Sirens. Humans and the girls called "Kanmusume" formed a common front "Azur Lane" and launched an unprecedented counterattack. Humans regained control of the sea from the Sirens step by step.

From the moment the ship girl was born in this world, history officially opened a new chapter. Starting from this year, the Gregorian calendar was transformed into the Azure calendar. Whether it was this world or mankind, everything began to change in a new direction, and the story begins here.

Time came to the 56th year of the Azure Calendar, and time suddenly jumped to fifty-six years later. After fifty-six years, the world's structure had undergone earth-shaking changes. The messy national barriers in the old calendar had long been broken, becoming a unified federation. Humans had no choice but to do so. Only by uniting could they regain their living space from the Sirens.

Despite many problems, humanity has indeed achieved unity, shaking hands and moving forward regardless of country, skin color, or religion. The first twenty years of the Azure Calendar were the dark period before dawn and the most brutal struggle. In this war, humans will die and ship girls will sink. During the twenty years of struggle in this dark period, Azure Lane has indeed gradually regained control of the sea, even if it is not all, it is enough.

The next thirty-six years were the dawn period. Although there were still disputes of varying sizes in various oceans around the world, the goal of peace was indeed achieved.

Faced with the joint counterattack by humans and ship girls, the Siren strangely did not increase their combat power, nor did they pursue the victory. After Azur Lane gradually regained control of the sea, it seemed to maintain a certain "balance point". On the basis of this "balance point", the Siren would not further regain the sea control that was taken away by Azur Lane, but would not allow Azur Lane to further increase its sea control. Therefore, the two sides fought each other for thirty-six years in this delicate "balance point".

During these long fifty-six years, the world has changed a lot, and this change can be said to be in all aspects. New things born from the sea include not only ship girls, but also a group of very strange... or perhaps it should be said to be "wonderful" yellow chickens. According to the self-description of this group of yellow chickens that resemble a group of yellow chickens, it seems that they call themselves "barbarian chickens". What's more peculiar is that they have extremely strong technical capabilities. From ship equipment repairs and adjustments that humans are helpless to do, to various building constructions, nothing can be difficult for this group of yellow chickens. Humans have tried to use the yellow chickens, but they have been rejected without exception. They have stated that they will only serve the ship girls.

Humans had no choice but to compromise, and during the war years there was an extreme shortage of technicians and craftsmen. The appearance of the barbarians greatly alleviated this shortcoming.

Compared to the Manju that can appear anywhere, another equally puzzling existence is the Command Cat. This thing is different from the Manju, it needs to be fished out before it appears, but it has to be said that the existence of the Command Cat is really a big help. At least as long as there are Manju and the Command Cat in the port area, a lot of troubles can be avoided.

For humans, both the Barbarian and the Command Cat are extremely puzzling existences. Many scientists have even conducted research on this, but in the end they all gave up without exception and attributed them to the same unscientific "miracle" as the KanColle.

As history evolved into the relatively peaceful next thirty-six years, humans, who had finally entered a relatively peaceful era, finally had time to think about more issues.

It is well known that wherever there is life and intelligence, there will inevitably be conflicts. During the relatively peaceful 36 years that followed, conflicts between humans and ship girls also arose.

The power to protect mankind must be in their own hands. Since they are the inheritance of the name of the battleships from the past, the ship girls must naturally obey humans. The ship girls believe that humans just need to be protected by themselves and not think about other messy things all day long.

Although the existence of KanColle is a beautiful life born out of all the beautiful fantasies, they do have the emotions that humans should have. There are innocent and brilliant people in their group, and naturally there are also individuals with strong opinions.

This contradiction has become increasingly greater in peacetime, especially in the past six years, and has almost reached its peak. Nowadays, there are not many ship girls willing to look for their own commanders. These ship girls who are more willing to believe in themselves have gathered in Alaska to form the largest port area.

The port area is divided into five major camps: White Eagle, Royal, Iron Blood, Sakura Empire, and Eastern Glory. The number of ship girls included is so large that even the human side has to bow down.

As the main fighting force in the counterattack against the Sirens, the group of ship girls now belongs to the privileged class in human society. No matter which ship girl comes out, she will definitely receive the highest level of hospitality and pursuit.

Chapter 2: The Human Camp at the Beginning of Hell

When facing ship girls, humans can only compromise, otherwise they will not be able to face the attack of the Siren fleet on their own. So sometimes, even if the ship girls kill people, the party being held accountable is likely to be humans, because every ship girl is kind, and to force these girls to kill people, there must be something fishy on the human side.

Despite this, there will still be countless humans who want to become commanders through the Naval Academy, and then "grab" a ship girl to rise to the top.

With the development of peacetime, some young people began to gradually forget the horrors of the war era and re-display the evil nature of human beings, pursuing beautiful ship girls for power and desire.

But these beautiful girls born from the sea seem to have an intuitive ability to see through people's hearts, and they don't look favorably upon those commanders who want to "save" them with bad intentions. It is precisely because of this that the conflicts and rifts between humans and ship girls are getting bigger and bigger.

As for the Alaska port area, which has the largest group of ship girls, humans have never given up sending commanders there to maintain the relationship between the two sides, but without exception, all of them were forced to leave by the ship girls using various methods. Even so, humans still keep sending commanders there.

The time was in the 56th year of the Azure Calendar, and the location was in the office of the Federal Navy Governor's Marshal's Office. In a simple yet extremely serious office, a middle-aged man with a serious face sat at the desk, his hands crossed and his chin supported, making a standard commander's posture. In fact, his identity was indeed the commander-in-chief of the entire Federal Navy.

There are many titles for him, including commander-in-chief, governor-general, marshal, chief, etc., but he was able to climb to the highest position in the authority at only about 50 years old. Don't think it was because of backdoors and luck, he relied on hard power. Moreover, if his life experience was written into a biography, it would be a perfect template for a winner in life. If reality was a novel, this commander-in-chief would definitely be the male protagonist.

His life experience cannot be described as wonderful. Born in the early days of the Dark Ages of the Azure Calendar, he shook hands with the earliest ship girls. The commanders in the later period of the Azure Calendar basically commanded operations in the rear, but the commanders in the dark age were on the front line killing the enemies together with the ship girls. It can be said that the soldiers who opened up living space for mankind in the past were all tough guys, and the commanders in today's peacetime era cannot be compared with them at all.

In addition, people call him "Emperor of Europe". Yes, this guy is very European. How European is he? He is so European that he has retained the most number of commanders among the current ship girls. That's why he is a perfect male protagonist template. For this reason, he has been attacked many times by commanders who call themselves "non-Europeans".

This legendary commander is from Donghuang. Although he is still in his prime middle age, his temples are gray, making him a handsome middle-aged marshal. This legendary commander is named "Wang Zhenhuang", a very imposing name.

But now the marshal is also worried about the tense relationship between humans and ship girls. He would rather go to the front line and fight the Sirens himself than face the trouble of this internal strife. His temples have turned white because of worrying about this, but he has to face it even if it is troublesome, because he is the highest person in charge.

In addition to him, there was another young adjutant in this office. The young man with glasses and a cold face was obviously a secretary. He was also Wang Zhenhuang's right-hand man, Edward Dovit. This blond and cold-faced young man was not only a secretary, but also an active commander, but he was not as brilliant as the governor in front of him.

He placed a personnel file on Wang Zhenhuang's desk and reported to him, "Governor, Commander Li Mingyuan has formally submitted his resignation from the port area. With him included, we can't even last a month."

Wang Zhenhuang frowned deeply after taking a look at the personnel file in front of him. "I didn't expect that even Li Mingyuan couldn't hold on. This boy is already the top talent in the Naval Academy in the past five years. Even so, he still can't be favored by those ship girls in the Alaska port area?"

Edward's face remained cold as he continued to state the profound questions about humans and shipgirls, as if it had nothing to do with him: "Now it seems to be true. Governor, who will you choose to go to that port next? You must know that the port has become a well-deserved "devil's den" in the eyes of the active commanders, and none of them are willing to go there to take office."

It's still relatively good now. In the early days, commanders of varying quality were sent to take office. The idiot who was blinded by beauty was directly blown to pieces by the bad-tempered big sister, and not even ashes were left. The commanders who were sent there later were harassed by all kinds of difficulties and resigned voluntarily. Now, no matter who is chosen, they will find all kinds of reasons and excuses to refuse.

“Ah~~~~~”

After hearing the secretary's statement, the legendary commander couldn't help but grab his pale head and let out a low groan. This port area with the largest number of ship girls became his most distressing problem.

Finally, he grabbed the stack of personnel information and threw it to the sky, shouting in despair: "I've sent all kinds of handsome guys to "Donghuang Foul Words", but none of these women like them. Who else can I send?!"

His sudden self-abandonment broke his serious personality and revealed the side of a stupid middle-aged uncle. It's not that he had never thought about taking part in the battle himself. In fact, he had already done so, but was rejected in a shameful way and couldn't even get into the port gate.

In response to his sudden self-destruction, Edward pushed his glasses up and stressed, "Governor, please don't add to my workload. And...if you're done complaining, please immediately decide on the next person to take over."

"cut!"

Hearing that his urging was totally ignored, Wang Zhenhuang sat back in his seat in displeasure: "No need to bring the information of the active commanders. I won't send them over. Those women won't buy it anyway."

Hearing this, Edward frowned: "So you're giving up? That's the largest port area in KanColle. If we leave it alone, I'm afraid there will be more and more disagreements and problems."

No one knew what he was planning. Wang Zhenhuang smiled thoughtfully and said, "Who said I left it alone? I just didn't send an active commander over there."

This made Edward even more confused: "If you don't send active commanders, are you going to send retired commanders? Although those ship girls will respect retired commanders, those old men have stubborn tempers, and most of them are receiving treatment in nursing homes for PTSD. Letting them go will only make the situation worse."

Chapter 3: The Navy’s savior, Meowaku, makes his grand appearance!

As if he had expected the other party to ask such a question, Wang Zhenhuang showed a very annoying smile: "What nonsense are you talking about? Isn't there another candidate?"

That arrogant look really made people want to throw him out of the window, but Edward's cold face remained unchanged: "Governor, please don't play dumb. There is no suitable candidate among the active or retired commanders. You can't possibly want to look for a candidate from the non-commander group, right?"

Wang Zhenhuang picked up the telephone on his desk, dialed a number and said, "Tell Comrade Wang Lele to report to the Governor's Office now."

When he read out the name "Wang Lele", Edward's cold face finally broke, and he showed an expression of "Is this guy really a devil?"

He showed a rare expression of shock and loudly rebuked him: "Are you crazy? Or do you not know how dangerous those ship girls are? You actually sent Lele over there. If you don't want to raise the child anymore, just tell me. I am willing to take over the custody of the child."

From the word "that child" he said, we can roughly know that the person who will be called over might be a child.

Wang Zhenhuang put down the receiver and expressed his disdain for his words: "You still want custody of the child? You know that the stupid fathers who want custody of the child can line up from the Governor's Office to the port area. Even if you want to fight for it, it won't be your turn."

Edward no longer wanted to argue with him about this trivial matter. Before that, he had to make one thing clear. He no longer cared about etiquette, stepped forward and pressed hard on the desk with both hands, and asked loudly, "Stop talking nonsense here. Do you have the heart to throw such a good child into that devil's den? Or did I not think of reporting that those commanders who resigned more or less suffered from mental illness because of this? You actually let such a lovely child go to such a dangerous place. Do you really have no conscience?"

After all, this is a serious matter, Wang Zhenhuang had to explain seriously: "It is precisely because of that child that I decided to choose that child after careful consideration. You should also know that the child is a special existence, especially for the group of ship girls. You should know that the child was almost kidnapped by the ship girl on the road, and finally asked the army's spy chief to bring the child back."

That's right, it may be a little hard to believe, but the comrade Wang Lele they mentioned was almost abducted by a certain ship girl, and almost succeeded. If he hadn't had no experience in abduction, that spy chief might not have been brought back. Poor spy chief was finally sent to the ICU for rescue by the violent ship girl, and has begun to live an early retirement life.

It was also because of this incident that they realized that this child seemed to have an inexplicable attraction to the existence of the Ship Girl as an individual, so they had to arrange for Wang Lele to work in a place far away from the Ship Girl.

At the same time, there is another interesting piece of gossip, that is, as the abduction failed and the ship girls could not find their targets, they began to post various missing person notices on the ship girls. As a result, Wang Lele’s existence became a rumor similar to an urban legend.

Edward was unable to accept the statement and tried to defend himself: "But Comrade Wang Lele is still a child. It is too early for him to face all this. Why don't we..."

"Edward Dovitt!!!"

Suddenly, Wang Zhenhuang let out a deafening roar and reprimanded him with a serious look: "Face the current situation. The conflict between the navy and the ship girls has reached its highest point in the past few years. We can no longer hesitate. You already know very well that the child is the last, but most suitable candidate. Moreover, the child will grow up one day and leave his nest, so stop making these unrealistic excuses."

After being reprimanded, Edward still had to force himself to calm down, even though he still couldn't accept it. "I'm sorry, I lost my temper just now, but please forgive me for saying one more thing, can you really let that child go alone? Without any help, the port area cannot be operated at all."

When it comes to this matter, Wang Zhenhuang has already made arrangements: "You don't have to worry about this matter. I have already contacted Donghuang. They will at least give me a favor as a fellow villager and provide a little help to Comrade Wang Lele."

knock knock!

Just as Edward was about to say something, there was a knock on the office door. The protagonist finally arrived. Wang Zhenhuang immediately perked up and shouted, "Come in."

Click.

The wooden door was opened, and everyone saw a muscular man with a resolute face, but he was not Comrade Wang Lele. He was only responsible for escorting and opening the door. The real protagonist had to look down.

An incredible creature with two heads and a body is strolling by, wearing a miniature pure white navy uniform and a miniature navy hat on its head, but the most eye-catching thing is the cat tail behind its hips and the black cat ears on its head. To describe it in two words, it is cute; to describe it in three words, it is very cute; to describe it in four words, it is extremely cute; to describe it in one sentence, it is a cute creature that came out of a patriotic country and grew up eating cuteness.

This cute creature is obviously not a human being. It seems to be commanding cats, but it is definitely not a creature that commands cats. It is such a cute creature, but it has to pretend to be very serious as it moves forward, as if even the sound of its footsteps has a special "puff" sound effect.

"Comrade Wang Lele, report to the Governor-General, meow!"

With her two-headed body, she saluted to Wang Zhenhuang, and even had her own habit of speaking at the end of her voice. If there were any female staff here, they would definitely pick up this child and rub him hard. There was no way to resist this kind of cuteness.

Talking about Wang Lele's origin is really ridiculous, because this child was rescued by Wang Zhenhuang five years ago. Yes, he was "rescued" back, just like rescuing a command cat.

Even though it sounds ridiculous, it is indeed the truth. When he saw the child lying in the cat box and staring at him, he never thought that he would bring the child back and have the custody under his name. He even gave the child the name Wang Lele.

Looking back now, perhaps the luckiest thing I have ever done in my life is to "rescue" this child.

Looking at the child's bright eyes, Wang Zhenhuang couldn't help but sigh as a father. Recalling every detail of the past five years with the child, it would be a lie to say that he was reluctant and not worried, but he had to harden his heart to do this.

He asked Wang Lele a routine question: "Comrade Wang Lele, I have a very important task for you now. Are you willing to accept it?"

Chapter 4: The Navy Red Deer Who Eats the Date Pill

When Wang Lele heard that he was going to be assigned an important task, his eyes lit up immediately and he shouted, "I will definitely complete the task, meow!"

Without any hesitation, the lovely child immediately replied in the Donghuang-style military manner.

Originally, Wang Zhenhuang wanted to ask the other party about his willingness, but seeing how excited he was, he felt that he could completely ignore it. But the problem was that the other party had no idea how dangerous this mission was.

In the end, he couldn't get over his own conscience, so he added a "restriction" to this mission: "Don't be happy too soon. This mission is extremely difficult. If you don't get the recognition of a camp within a month, you will be sent back immediately."

"I will try my best to become friends with everyone, meow. I love making friends the most!"

Hearing this, Wang Lele patted his chest with a proud and confident look on his face. He was not bragging, he seemed to have a natural affinity with the group of barbarian cats and command cats. No matter where the barbarian cats and command cats came from, they could all play with him.

Because of this, as long as Wang Lele stays, even in purely human residences, you can see Manju and command cats everywhere. You must know that this group of wonderful creatures only serve the ship girls, but now they get along with Wang Lele very friendly, which raises more questions. What kind of existence is Wang Lele, the unique command cat?

It’s not like there were no scientists who proposed to dissect the child before, but they were all rejected by Wang Zhenhuang. Fortunately, it was Wang Zhenhuang who rescued the child, otherwise, ordinary people would not have been able to save the child.

Unfortunately, at this moment, little Wang Lele didn’t know that the group of ship girls were not as easy to get along with as Manchu and the command cat.

Looking at the child's still optimistic smile, Wang Zhenhuang felt that his "conscience" was already aching, but he had to do it: "Comrade Wang Lele, I know that it may be a bit shameless to say this, but I still hope to ask you as a human being to become a bridge between us humans and the ship girls."

The innocent child did not quite understand the overly complicated matter, but still responded seriously: "Oh! Leave it to me! I will try my best to become friends with everyone and play with them."

What a good child! If possible, I really don't want this child to face those dangerous ship girls. Wang Zhenhuang stood up and paid the highest courtesy to this child: "Comrade Wang Lele, no matter what the result is, our entire navy is your solid backing, so even if you suddenly don't want to continue the mission, we will welcome you back!"

Not only him, but Edward next to him also paid him the highest courtesy. Only they knew how dangerous this journey was, but they actually gave such a dangerous task to a simple and lovely child. As adults, they felt really guilty.

They will never make excuses for their incompetence, the only thing they can do is to give their commitments.

Wang Lele, who didn't know much, felt the serious atmosphere and immediately learned to do the naval salute, but he looked very cute when he did it.

"Then my child, let's go now. I have arranged everything for you."

Unexpectedly, they had to set off so soon. Wang Zhenhuang had no choice but to do this because he was afraid that if he looked at them for one more moment, he would not be able to help but cancel the mission. After all, as a father, he couldn't bear to let his children face a group of cruel women.

Edward opened the door for him. Outside the door stood rows of yellow chickens and command cats. These cute creatures seemed to know where Lele was going next and saluted him in unison, as if they were seeing off a warrior who was about to go on a long journey. Not only the barbaric chickens and command cats, but also a group of young commanders who knew of Lele's mission stood in a row to salute him.

As Wang Lele walked away, he also said goodbye to everyone: "Everyone, I'm going to be away for a while, and I'll be back soon to play with you all, meow."

Everyone watched as this adorable child disappeared at the end of the corridor. Until this moment, one of the Sakura Empire commanders who was seeing him off finally couldn't hold back his tears. "Wuwuwuwuwuwuwu, no!!! I really can't accept letting such a cute and sensible child go to that "devil's den". I should stop that child! No! I must stop him now!!!"

"You idiot! Wake up!"

"That's right! You're not the only one who wants to cry!"

"This is the Governor-General's order! Don't make things more complicated!"

"Another one is crazy! Pull him down!"

………………

Amid the commotion, Wang Zhenhuang and Edward looked at the extremely funny yet extremely real scene before them, but they were not surprised at all, because Wang Lele's popularity in the Governor's Mansion was really extraordinary.

After a long while, Edward spoke: "Governor, please forgive me for asking one more question. Your decision will make those commanders very unhappy."

Wang Zhenhuang's eyes revealed a hint of determination: "If you have any dissatisfaction, just keep it to yourself. If anyone has "withdrawal symptoms", lock them up in a small dark room until they calm down."