I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

This is something I really think. I've never received a thank you for helping others before, so... I think it's important to say this more often.

"Hmm...what happened all of a sudden?"

"Haven't I already thanked you once? But that's nothing. Appreciation should be reciprocated with concrete actions."

Okay, okay, I already know this.

"Then I want the same treatment as Rin-chan—and I'll make my own demands when the time comes."

...Wait, why is Yehui starting to act like this too...

"Hey, could you please not imitate me..."

"I'm just borrowing your ideas. And I do need Sheji's help with something..."

"Well, whatever you want."

"Don't be angry—" "Angry? I'm not."

“…”

In a sense, this scene is probably quite unforgettable to me.

More than just data

Please don't argue for me - in this situation, I really have the urge to persuade you like this.

But of course, such words cannot be said out loud.

Although, from a certain perspective, this argument was indeed caused by me, but if I tried to stop them like this, I'd definitely be looked down upon... maybe even called a disgusting person. And thinking that way would be a bit too narcissistic. So... ignoring these two people is probably the best option. Anyway, given Yehui's personality, he wouldn't be angry about what Rinquanchuan said.

We were quite similar in this respect. We both knew that Miss Lin was just a person who had a bad mouth, but she was a good girl at heart.

Let's keep some distance so that the two of them can talk for a while.

Thinking of this, I quickened my pace a little.

To be honest, there are quite a few things that need to be investigated.

Besides figuring out what happened at my school a few years ago, I also need to investigate Yao Qiong. I don't have any clues about the keywords I should look for yet, but it's just an experiment. If I find anything, it could save me a lot of trouble.

But there is one thing that makes people concerned.

It’s not that I’m worried that nothing can be found out about this matter, but...what should I do if everything comes to light but I have no ability to change the status quo?

There is no reason, I just had this thought for no reason... Maybe it was because I thought about what happened before and realized that I couldn't help anyone.

Even though I try hard to make that girl who doesn't know what is normal and can't sleep become able to clearly distinguish what is normal and fall asleep peacefully every night as she wishes...but this is still my own idea after all, and the facts will not change according to my ideas.

There are many obstacles to accomplishing something. This is probably because countless factors are needed to trigger an event. This is clearly explained in history classes. Whenever a major event occurs, the social context is always discussed first, followed by an analysis of the triggering factors. This is enough to prove that phenomena that attract attention don't just appear out of thin air, but gradually develop from some unnoticed period of time.

"...wanting to sleep but not being able to...what's that feeling like?"

If you haven't experienced it, you naturally can't understand it.

Even though she sometimes didn't want to sleep, she would find herself drifting off to sleep the next day, almost late. Even on her days off, when she had the nerve to stay up late, she would often play games to get through the night...but that wasn't the case with her.

He had no favorite games, and wasn't interested in his phone. How did he manage to get through a full night without sleeping? Did he read? Or did he just lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about insignificant things... or perhaps, just staring out the window at the pitch-black scene?

I can't imagine it, but there's no reason to ask him about it. If it were me, I certainly wouldn't want to talk about something that makes me feel so lonely.

“Are you experiencing insomnia right now?”

Ye Hui's question suddenly came from behind him. What? Did someone hear me talking to myself again?

"No wonder you fall asleep so often in class... Turns out you have insomnia - are you sure it's not because of playing mobile games?" Rinquanchuan also made his own guess.

"Well...it's not me who's having trouble sleeping." But they'll inevitably ask who's suffering from it, so I've already thought of someone. "It's my mom...She's been so stressed out at work lately, it seems, that she can't sleep at night without even a little noise. So my dad's been sent to sleep on the sofa in the living room."

Even though it's completely untrue, I could have made up this excuse and made it sound like the truth. I'm sorry, Mother, for saying bad things about you behind your back... Does that even count as bad words...

"It turns out that there was something wrong with Auntie's health... Is her condition improving now?"

"Is that so... Then it's better to see a doctor as soon as possible. You can come to me if you need anything."

Oh, good. Looks like both of them are convinced.

By the way, what did Lin Quanchuan mean when he said that I could go to her if I needed anything... Could she even arrange a doctor for me?

“It’s much better now…”

Well, let's leave this topic at that for now. If this gets brought up in front of Mother someday... then she might end up making things difficult for me.

Episode 4: More Than Just Data

"It'll close in about an hour..." Ye Hui noticed the library's opening hours. "Isn't it possible to finish checking everything in this amount of time?"

"...Well, I can't say for sure." That being said, I also felt that time was running out. "If it really doesn't work out, we can do it another day."

"I don't come here very often." Lin Quanchuan seemed not to care about our conversation and continued talking about his own things. "Because I don't really like borrowing books. It doesn't feel good to borrow and then return them."

"That's right..."

I don't think it's a big deal. If she really liked the book, she could have kept it and paid the fine for losing it... Someone like her wouldn't care about that kind of small amount. But this kind of behavior is definitely not something we should encourage.

"Let's go upstairs and ask if any of the old news is still preserved..."

It feels a bit strange to still call news that's been out for so many years "news." But most people don't think there's anything wrong with it.

"I'm still very curious about what you want to find out..."

"It will become clear then—"

. . . . . . .

Should I say it's not surprising or something... It's obviously a very practical place, but because it's so easy to search online, there are hardly any people looking for anything here.

Fortunately, the reception staff did not seem to be slacking off.

"What information do you want to inquire about?"

"...Ah, let me think..."

The receptionist was actually quite pretty. I took a moment to assess her, so I could barely keep up with her conversation.

"It was about four or five years ago...on the local news."

I wonder how many of the people she sees are looking for similar news. In my opinion, the number of people who come here specifically to investigate is definitely small.

"That was news from four and five years ago, right?"

"Yeah...yes." Because I can't remember exactly in which grade of junior high school this happened...it wasn't the third year anyway.

"What are the keywords?"

"Ah..." I glanced at Lin Quanchuan and Ye Hui beside me. Because they were nearby, I didn't want to make the key words too clear. "Then... junior high school, safe..."

After something like that happened, it's only natural to remind middle school students to be careful. In that situation, the newspapers probably only covered this much...

"Junior high school and safety, right?"

She confirmed again.

"Uh...wait, one more...missing."

When I said this, she looked puzzled. But in the end, she said nothing... because that wasn't her area of ​​responsibility.

"...Okay, wait a moment."

“…”

If I'm lucky, there will be about 40 or 50 similar news items. After all, this kind of thing happens almost every year... It's already like this in just one city, let alone how many cities are in this country.

"Four years ago, there were thirty-seven items, and five years ago, there were twenty-eight items... Do we need to continue screening?"

"...then...add women."

I thought about it and added something.

"Okay. Please wait a moment—"

"Wait, Sheji...what on earth are you investigating?"

Ye Hui's question suddenly appeared in my ears.

But she didn't ask me directly... Instead, she leaned over and whispered in my ear. This was quite unpredictable and difficult for me to handle.

"Um... nothing..."

My ears are a little itchy...

"Is that so... I thought..." It seemed that she really noticed something.

“…It’s okay…”

I wanted to say something to comfort her...but it seemed like there was nothing I could say.

"The results are in. There were 22 results from four years ago, and 24 from five years ago... Do I need to add more keywords?"

"no need."

The result still didn't reduce much... In other words, most of the people who got into trouble were girls...

Please print them all out for me.

"Okay... there's a fee for this," she said, pointing me in a direction. "Please handle it over there."

.........

Introducing adolescent scum into the school system is a foolish and misguided decision. However, the school doesn't screen out these scumbags... Because of compulsory education, dropping out and taking a leave of absence are virtually nonexistent in junior high. Coupled with the policy of reducing sentencing for minors... these scumbags feel protected, free to act with confidence and unfettered, following their own impulses.

It turns out that education is completely ineffective for scum.

"..."

And some things... even if they exist, people will still choose to turn a blind eye. No matter how many cases have occurred, the waves they stirred up will never last more than two weeks... The "messengers of justice" who were originally filled with righteous indignation will gradually disappear, and those who truly want to change the injustice will still be isolated and helpless.

“…”

Are these things unchangeable...just because they've always been that way, so there's no way to change them, and no need to change them?

“…”

In the past two years... just here, so many people have lost their lives for one reason... What if I remove those keywords... how many are there? Of course, this is only the number reported... There are also many more that are maliciously concealed and unknown...

"Too much..."

Since I was looking through the printed news, in the eyes of Rinquanchuan and Yehui, I was just complaining about the amount of news.

But what I thought... was much more than that.

"I'm done reading." I just flipped through two pages and suddenly closed the news I had sorted out. "It's getting late. I'd better take it home and read it slowly."

"Eh? Does that mean we don't need your help?" Rinquanchuan looked a little unhappy. It seemed like I had dragged her here but didn't let her do anything... I felt really sorry for wasting both of their time.

"I won't be using it today...that's all. I'm enough on my own...I'll come back to check on other things on my day off, so I'll trouble you again then."

Struggle and struggle and struggle

Patience is truly an incredible thing.

"Is there really no need for our help?"

"Sorry to bother you all this time... The information you actually got was less than I expected."

I should be angry right now. However, when facing Ye Hui's question, I still managed to show an expression as if nothing had happened.

"That being said, you've already troubled us. So you still have to help us."

"...Didn't I say there would be a next time?"

No matter how angry you are, you shouldn't inflict your negative emotions on people who have nothing to do with you. That being said, there are times when you can't control your emotions... Anger is often considered a sin because it can lead people to act rashly and do things they wouldn't normally do.

"What do you mean there will be a next time? Are you lying about this?"

"of course not..."

From my current experience, it's difficult to define the concept of rationality. However, self-control is undoubtedly closely related to it. However, compared to the rather rigid concept of rationality, I find self-control, with its added personal touch, more relevant to me.