I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

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"..."

"I've already said it, right? Yehui, you didn't do anything wrong."

. . . . . . .

She is too kind after all.

After thinking for a long time, this is the only conclusion I can come to.

For me, this is something I find difficult to understand... Why should I feel pity for such people? Seeing them disappear one by one, and never having any contact with them again, should be something worth being happy about.

However...

"......"

She doesn't look happy. What is she worried about? Obviously, I want to see her smile more often.

"Ah, it's so cold..."

What am I thinking...why would I have such...such cowardly thoughts as that guy's.

"Ahh, what a hassle..."

It's been almost two hours since school was over, and I haven't returned home yet. I'm just standing on a completely unfamiliar street, quietly enduring the cold wind.

There is naturally a reason for doing this.

"Ah sneeze——!"

Finally, the body sends a signal that it needs calories.

If you need to keep warm, a scarf alone seems far from enough. However, I don't like to look bulky, so I'm wearing a little light.

I thought I could resolve this sooner rather than later... but I didn't expect anyone besides me would be hanging out at this hour. Well, on second thought, it makes sense. After all, those guys don't usually have much to do, so it's understandable that they'd be hanging out.

If it's a waste of my time, then forget it. Just treat that guy as the scum of the future society. It doesn't really have anything to do with me...

It's just that he appeared where he shouldn't have been, and affected the wrong people. If that's the judgment, then it's a real mistake to me.

“Tread—” “Tread—”

The sound of footsteps suddenly appeared in my ears.

"Finally... I'm freezing to death."

If I continue like this, not only will I not be able to help her, I might even fall ill in the end.

Well, anyway, now is not the time to think about these things.

“It’s so cold today…”

Mumbling to myself, I walked from the dark corner to the streetlight. And just like that, I met that figure under the streetlight.

"The weather changes really don't make sense...right?"

I could see the figure's face clearly under the street light, and it looked exactly like the person I was looking for.

"...? What, are you talking to me?"

"...What else?"

"...Neuropathy."

He didn't seem to want to pay any attention to me and pushed me aside rudely and prepared to leave.

"Well, speaking of -- and --, I suppose you both know each other, right?"

After reporting the names of the two people, he indeed stopped.

Finally...it starts again.

睨诘

When will I be able to stop...

Even if I wrap the scarf tightly, I still can't feel any warmth. After all, clothes have no temperature, and it is impossible for them to generate heat on their own. The warmth that can be felt actually comes from oneself.

Influencing and changing everything around us is what humans have always done. Perhaps this also means that humans can only rely on themselves.

"Pah."

"Um...."

It felt like something had fallen on my head.

"..."

With the help of the street lamp, I could clearly see the object that I was holding in my hand.

I thought it was a dying autumn insect, but it turned out to be just a dead leaf blown by the wind. I have to say, I was really shocked at the time... When faced with the unknown, people really associate it with the things they fear.

"Withering...falling..."

For plants, if they have to separate a part of their body due to the arrival of autumn, will they feel resistance or... pain?

Humans are not plants, so they naturally don’t know.

But because plants have no way or method to communicate with humans, it is impossible for humans to understand them... In this case, of course they will pretend to understand and respond with "How can plants have feelings?" or "Of course not."

This is what is called arrogance, the arrogance of regarding oneself as the master of all things. As I've already mentioned, I don't dislike this...and the reason I don't dislike it is because I myself enjoy exercising this kind of "arrogance."

If I were to explain it more specifically...it would be "the right to arbitrarily judge other people's way of life."

Ah, trouble.

Although he clearly dislikes being restricted, he constantly seeks to change others' minds according to his own will... whether it's through violence or words, as long as he can influence others to act in accordance with his will. Ultimately, however, he still follows the law of the jungle.

Is it right to presumptuously decide how others live?

I don't know.

But I know that what I am doing now is not wrong.

"..."

Just like dead branches and fallen leaves that are no longer needed, giving up is necessary... Perhaps this is the only point of understanding that that guy and I have in common.

Hmm...it seems there are still subtle differences.

Chapter 12: Glancing

"...A lot of people have quit the painting club recently."

"Oh... Really?"

I didn't expect that even Lin Yi noticed this. This means that many people have noticed this matter... In this case, am I being too anxious?

"Don't you think there's something strange about this?"

"...I wouldn't be surprised by anything that happens at this time. After all, the college entrance exam is only a year away...it's normal to give up something that doesn't suit you."

This kind of reasoning should be able to convince most people. After all, they don't really care about the root cause of such things. As long as a relatively reasonable explanation is given, they will not dwell on it anymore.

"That seems to make sense..." She nodded thoughtfully. "By the way, I remember you had contact with that teacher... What was his attitude towards this?"

"Ah... let me think."

About him a few days ago...

"Teacher, you don't look very well. What happened?"

"Oh... it's you. Yesterday, a girl who was just messing around quit the club, saying she didn't fit in. I didn't really want to try to keep her, so I gave her some token persuasion and allowed her to leave..."

"..."

"But who would have thought that today, a guy who I thought was very perceptive actually asked me to withdraw, saying that his family had already agreed. No matter how much I persuaded him... he didn't seem to be willing to change his mind. I'm considering whether to force him to stay."

“I see…”

"By the way, aren't you also a sophomore in high school, Shaji? What do you think about this kind of thing? When something like this happens..."

"Teacher, do you mean... that I should analyze the reasons from the perspective of my peers?"

"...How... Do you know something?"

"Well, I wouldn't say I know. But if I'm just assuming it, it's okay... Maybe I just joined the club on a whim because I didn't have a lot of schoolwork in my first year of high school. Now that I'm in my second year, with the pressure of the upcoming college entrance exam, I want to study hard."

"Hmm... I can understand this conclusion for the first person... but that boy, with his abilities, he could definitely get into a good school based on his art scores."

"Well... maybe it's because he doesn't really like art. He thinks that once he enters university, he'll have to study all sorts of subjects related to it, and he'll be stuck with it forever. If he gives up then, it'll be like wasting his energy on useless work. He thinks it's better to give up now than to give up later because of something he doesn't like... That's probably what he thinks."

"...Now that you put it that way...it makes sense..."

"Teacher, you think he's very talented, and you're right to remind him to cherish this gift... But this gift may not be very valuable to him, and may even be a form of torture."

"..."

"And I'm sure there are many who share this sentiment... but for various reasons they prefer not to express it."

"..."

"In that case, why not formally ask for their opinions..."

"If you try as I say..."

"..."

"Teacher... he's in pretty good shape. He seems a lot happier."

At least for him, everyone was listening attentively to what he said now... rather than just muddling through life with a complete lack of motivation. For him, there couldn't be a more comfortable teaching environment.

Of course, I don't know exactly how I negotiated with the principal. After all, this is related to the school's admission rate. The advantage of art students over liberal arts students should be that the score cutoff will be appropriately lower, which should make it easier for them to get into a good university.

Well, maybe he just repeated to the principal what I said to him... and he was obviously tired of having to teach so many people who didn't pay attention in class.

"Looking good...? Even though we lost so many students..."

"It's not about losing. It's like something bad happened," I corrected him.

"Ah... Sorry, I didn't notice." She looked a little nervous. "I mean, why is it that the number of people he teaches has decreased... He's still in good spirits, even happy."

"Having fewer people to manage is naturally happier... It's like moving books; the fewer books you have to move, the better. Having to teach so many people would be exhausting for the teacher, too."

Don’t you even understand such a simple truth... Really?

"That's true..."

But she still looked like she was thinking.

“…”

This girl named Lin Yi...

"But I always feel like I'm shirking my responsibilities."

“…”

...his personality seems to be quite troublesome as well.

...........

"In the end, you're still useless."

"What do you mean..."

I was reading a novel and didn't pay much attention to Lin Chenruo's conversation. From her tone, I could tell she was about to mock me.