I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

"Shut up, this is a place that holds my memories! This is a sentiment that girls like you don't understand!"

That's right, a guy like Tongyou who looks like a top student (and is actually a top student), plus she's a girl, she never had any experience with arcade games as a child, let alone a passion for them. If you didn't have to come with me, who would have brought you here...

"What is sentiment? Box office or just an excuse to rehash old stuff?" She asked me with a frown.

"What's with that attitude? Have you been watching too many bad movies lately?" I didn't pay much attention to what she said and went straight to the counter to exchange the game coins.

"Anyway, I'm not asking you out...on a date or anything. If you want to kill time, this is my best choice. If you're not interested, you can go home!"

"Damn it!" Although she was very dissatisfied, she still followed me to the game console.

"What's wrong... don't you think it's boring?"

"Humph! Yes, but I still want to see what your feelings are..."

"Horizontal scrolling game..."

Because if the skills are in place, one game coin can be used for a long time...

Although fighting games were popular at that time, they also consumed the most game coins... and since I didn't have much spare money, I could only play this kind of game...

"Let's begin."

.....................

"What's wrong? Don't you like games?"

I rubbed my back where I had been slapped so hard.

"Why should I tell you? Besides, does it have anything to do with you whether I like it or not? You're already an internet addict, do you want to turn your smart and wise sister into an internet addict too?"

“...Huh... You actually said something like that. People who like games are all internet addicts or something...” That’s not the case at all. I like games only because I realize that this world is too bad.

People are always bluffing and do not allow voices and behaviors that are different from the mainstream to appear.

Therefore, the fate of the aliens is tragic.

"Ah, that's not the case... Ah, okay, okay, I like it, okay? I like it very much."

...You can tell from the perfunctory attitude at a glance!

"Well... let's play together later."

Although I'm not in the mood for that right now... I mean, if I ever encounter that situation again, I hope she can say those words to me again.

"Tsk~ No way~"

She said these words full of tsundere power, showed a look of disgust, then turned her head away, but couldn't help but secretly turned back to look at my expression. When she found that I was looking at her, she immediately turned her head away nervously.

That's really... not frank.

If you plan to go out for a walk

I have been pursuing something stubbornly all along.

Is it a tenacious and ardent inspiration, or a ray of light piercing the darkness?

It is indescribable and exists only in my imagination.

It only existed in my ideal, but never appeared in reality. I looked forward to its appearance, but after a long wait, I was only disappointed.

"I've had enough..."

Those situations, those behaviors, will always appear over and over again, no matter how the environment changes, those things will not disappear...

Just as any object casts a shadow in sunlight... I try to avoid seeing the inevitable darkness, but...

Those things have gone deep into my heart.

I don't want this...

Chapter 22 If you plan to go out and relax

"I can't contact Teacher Ailiya. If you can get in touch with her, please let me know as soon as possible. Thank you for your help."

Jiumuting received this shocking news from Ailiya's editor-in-chief. To verify whether it was correct, she called Ailiya and left her a message, but she didn't get a reply as quickly as usual.

This is enough to prove that Aaliyah is in big trouble...to the point where she won't accept any information.

"Is it because of what happened that day?"

Teacher Ailiya, who has never caused trouble and is a role model in the industry, showed such abnormal behavior. Jiumuting, who has seen her in person, immediately thought of her abnormal behavior yesterday.

His eyes are empty and his brows are furrowed, he must be worried about something.

But my interaction with her was limited to the Internet and the two recent meetings, so I had no idea what was wrong with her.

"What a troublesome guy."

Jiumuting couldn't help but think so.

"We have to go find her..."

Although she had no clue, she decided to cancel her appointment with her seniors today and try to find her on the street.

Since it is not uncommon to be unable to contact the author (for example, there is a guy named "Lingcun Sheji"), the editor is not that nervous.

But, could it be that they were oversimplifying things? For example, she had actually been hiding her true feelings...

"It's unlikely..."

Jiumuting quickly denied this guess, because she usually looks carefree, and her speech and personality are very cheerful...so it shouldn't be the case.

"I just forgot to bring my phone while shopping."

She guessed this and prepared to go out.

.................

Not to mention humans, even animals and plants have various needs.

To survive, plants need sufficient water and appropriate sunlight, as well as soil that is suitable for their survival and an environment with few pests and diseases.

In order to survive, animals need sufficient food and water, a suitable living environment, territory where they can move freely, a hiding place to protect themselves, and... a suitable mate.

To sum up, human needs are basically the same as those of animals... However, after a long time, humans seem to want to clearly distinguish themselves from animals, so based on their needs, they pursue something that is based on needs but is higher than them... Or you can say it is a feeling.

Something called "pleasure".

This word seems to have changed its meaning after being used by many people...but it is nothing more than an expression of another kind of pursuit, a behavior that takes precedence over reproduction.

In fact, people eat to fill their stomachs and keep their bodies functioning so as to avoid life-threatening nutritional and energy deficiencies.

But now, eating is not just about filling your stomach, but also about... "pleasure." Many people have different standards for this.

Some people focus on the taste, some focus on the flavor, and some focus on the price... But no matter which one, when you taste it, you will feel a sense of satisfaction in your brain, which is a pleasure far greater than the feeling of "fullness".

So... this is a very strange thing.

Why do people have to pursue things beyond their essential nature... Or is it that, compared to survival, the satisfaction in one's heart is the most important thing?

But...what will happen if that feeling cannot be satisfied...

I don't know, I can't figure it out...

I don’t understand...I really still don’t understand people’s hearts.

"Oh, it's so hot~"

I forgot to dip the grilled meat in the sauce while I was thinking... My lips got burned. It was such a sudden and unexpected feeling...

"I actually got burned... Brother, what are you thinking about again..." Ye Jin was very serious about the operation... What? You won't be bored when no one talks to you? I was obviously thinking about random things because I was bored.

"I'm wondering...how human desires can be satisfied."

"Do you mean you're unsatisfied?"

Talking nonsense seriously...while eating.

"It's not just me, maybe many people are like this." After all, this is what human desires are like.

"Alas..."

"You seem to have misunderstood something... Not all desires are necessarily related to that. What's wrong with people these days? They clearly have greed, appetite, possessiveness, and the desire to compete, but when it comes to desire, they always think of sex."

It is true that the world is declining and people's hearts are not as old as they used to be.

"...Oh...didn't Mr. Lu Xun already complain about this?"

"I don't think that should be called complaining...Isn't it better to call it criticism?" In fact, there is no difference in essence.

Put it this way...it seems that it is not "people's hearts have changed" but "sticking to the old ways".

"...Criticism... is it any use?" she asked, finishing a piece of barbecue. "There's a lot of online criticism of reality these days... but the very things we're trying to change still don't change."

The reality is helpless. The earth does not revolve around someone just for him.

"...because it can't be changed, that's why some people are disappointed..." Maybe they even feel hopeless.

"Why are you suddenly feeling down...Okay, okay, let's stop talking about this for now. Let me ask you a question...Who invented barbecue?"

Are you trying to change the subject forcibly?... Well, forget it. I won't bother with it.

"...Maybe our ancestors thought raw meat was too unpalatable, so they threw it into the fire, and that's when the aroma came out..."

"Can you please be more careful when you explain..." She supported her face with one hand and tapped the small plate in front of me with her chopsticks.

When I looked at her, I noticed her contempt.

"Tsk..."

Even though I was so careless in changing the subject...

"I just don't believe in your biology books..."

At this moment, my phone, which hadn't received any calls for years, suddenly rang... This special ringtone...

"I'm going to answer a call over there..."

"Whatever..." She waved her hand at me, indicating that she was not interested.

"Don't ask for another one while I'm on the phone."

"...Do not."

Tsk... so annoying.

...............

I hurried to the bathroom before answering the call from Xiaoye...I was a little nervous.

"What's wrong, Xiaoye... Did you come to my house to look for me?"

After all, she basically won't contact me on her own initiative except for matters related to the novel.

"Ah... That's not the case... Your update speed has been quite stable recently, so I didn't want to rush you anymore."

“...Huh...” I felt relieved after hearing this.

"...Why do you seem so happy to hear that I'm not looking for you?"

"No, it's just your illusion."

Anyway, they were talking on the phone, so there is no evidence.

"Well, never mind...actually, there's something I need to tell you."

"...What's up..."

"Hmm... I can't get in touch with Teacher Ailiya. Although there aren't many ways to get in touch, and it happens before that readers suddenly can't get in touch... It happens to a certain author all the time..."

Ah... I feel like I was shot for no reason.

"So...why did you contact me?"

"Ah... Actually, we've already told many authors to keep an eye on it... After all, there are some things about her work that we can't decide on our own without Alia-sensei's consent."

"...All right..."

Celebrities are treated really well. It's good enough for someone like me to have an artist...

"By the way, did she tell me what happened? Maybe I'll have some clues."