A Young Woman's Heart

The rain at the end of summer was unexpectedly cold.

He seemed oblivious, still staring blankly at the sky.

Suddenly, I had an urge to rush down to the open space below and get soaked in the rain.

It's like when the end of the world is coming, you instinctively want to vent your last negative emotions before facing final death.

However, no matter what Mo Xueyao imagined in her heart, it was ultimately just a rain shower.

It was just a summer downpour.

It comes quickly and goes quickly.

It came suddenly, and it left suddenly.

There was no gradual decrease in the amount of rain.

In a short while, all the rain suddenly stopped, and the dark clouds in the sky seemed to be torn apart and crushed by a pair of giant hands, allowing people to see the sun still hanging high in the sky behind them.

The sun has not left; it has only been temporarily obscured.

At this moment, the sky was completely cloudless, a clear, azure blue as if it had been washed clean.

A rainbow suddenly appeared, seemingly stretching from one side of the city to the other.

A seven-colored rainbow looks delicious...

"Gurgle, gurgle." Mo Xueyao's stomach also rumbled in a very fitting manner.

"Uh... I'm so hungry, Dad—isn't it ready yet?"

"You've finished eating!" the father's voice came from the living room. "Didn't you not respond when I called you earlier?"

"Eh--?"

"Come and eat if you're hungry! There's one left!"

"Coming!" Mo Xueyao jumped out of bed, pushed open the door, and sat down at the dining table in the living room. "Dad, the rainbow is so beautiful today."

"Really? Let me see." After finishing breakfast, the father slowly walked into the kitchen and looked outside through the kitchen window.

Seeing the clear sky, one naturally also sees the clean and beautiful rainbow.

"Oh, not bad!"

"Right, but rainbows usually only appear after a heavy rain."

"Perhaps this is telling the world that life will become better after hardship."

"Nonsense." Mo Xueyao rolled her eyes.

That day, it was as if nothing had happened; he spent the whole day playing games on his Little Tyrant learning machine.

There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with using an educational machine to play games.

Lunch, dinner, and then my mother comes home.

Then it was time to go to bed.

Nighttime always seems to plunge people into melancholy.

Perhaps it's because people tend to overthink things late at night.

Even with the electric fan blowing directly on her, Mo Xueyao felt unbearably hot and restless, tossing and turning in bed, unable to fall asleep.

Through the window, you can see the stars surrounding the moon, twinkling as if they are watching over the world.

Knowing those things, it's impossible to fall asleep like usual anymore.

Why did such a thing happen to me?

A boy who is just two or three years away from becoming an adult learns one day that he is actually a girl.

In this day and age, few people can accept it.

Frustrated, Mo Xueyao grabbed a pillow and covered her face, only to suddenly feel that her cheeks were damp.

Is it a reluctance to relinquish one's male identity, or is it resistance or fear of something?

Mo Xueyao felt like a eunuch who knew he was about to enter the palace—although the reality was much better than that.

He recalled the sudden downpour that had occurred earlier that day.

If he hadn't been at home at the time, but had been standing in the rain, he would have been soaked to the bone.

Hmm... Even though it's a completely unrelated thing, I couldn't help but think about it.

But since I thought of rain, I couldn't help but think of the rainbow after the rain.

He doesn't know if he will see any rainbow after his life changes.

But his reason told him that continuing to run away would only be a delaying tactic.

Some decisions simply have to be made.

Even if it has to be done, it must be done.

No matter how difficult it is, it must be done.

Moreover, in reality, there is often only one correct option in what is called a decision.

My parents didn't mention this when I got home today.

But their words and actions showed that they cared about this matter and wanted to talk about it.

But I was afraid of hurting Mo Xueyao's feelings.

He rubbed his aching head and bit his finger hard.

It hurts.

But it can relieve the pain in his brain and make his thoughts clearer.

Fifty thousand yuan is a lot of money, but if we don't do this, we'll probably have to spend even more money in the future, and there might even be a major accident.

If I die suddenly, that would be fine; it would be a relief.

But what I fear most is being half-dead, or even unable to choose death.

If one is still barely conscious, it will cause pain to oneself and one's family; if one loses consciousness altogether, it will become a burden on one's family.

Compared to this, having surgery to become a girl seems like nothing at all.

Mo Xueyao felt a little more relaxed.

He jumped out of bed, turned on the dim desk lamp, and sat down at his desk.

He casually pulled a notebook from the drawer and tore off a page.

He needed to make a decision at this time to avoid hesitating and wavering again.

But I felt embarrassed and didn't want to tell my parents in person.

So, he simply wrote a few lines on the paper—

"Mom and Dad, don't worry about my feelings. Let's resolve this in the best way possible." Mo Xueyao stared at this sentence for a long time, then crumpled the paper into a ball and threw it into the desk drawer.

He tore off another page and started writing again.

This time, he only wrote seven words: "You can make the decision."

"In the end, I'm still running away..." Mo Xueyao muttered with a bitter smile, carefully pushing open the door and walking into the quiet living room.

My parents are probably already asleep.

He carefully placed the note on the dining table in the living room, but didn't weigh it down with anything, in case a gust of wind blew it into some corner.

Because his feelings were also complicated.

She both hoped her parents would see it and hoped they wouldn't, but in the end, she chose this seemingly fatalistic approach.

After doing all this, he sneaked back into his room like a thief and let out a long sigh of relief.

This night was unusually long for him...

……

Chapter Nine Fundraising and Preparation

Mo Xueyao, who hadn't slept all night, only felt sleepy as dawn approached.

But he only slept for two or three hours before his mother woke him up.

The clock shows eight o'clock.

Logically speaking, Mother should be going out by now.

She has jobs cleaning and cooking.

The scattered housework chores piled up make up her entire day.

"Xiaoyao, Xiaoyao, breakfast is ready."

Mo Xueyao jolted awake and sat up in bed.

"What's going on? Mom's suddenly being so gentle today... I'm not used to it..." he muttered, and walked out of the room wearing only his underwear.

"Xiaoyao, why did you come out without putting on your pants?"

"What's there to be afraid of... anyway..."

Just as Mo Xueyao was about to utter those next few words, the previously noisy living room fell into complete silence.

Even the morning news on television sounded like it was coming from another world.

"Uh..." Mo Xueyao realized something, licked her lips awkwardly, and went back to her room to put on the shorts that barely reached her knees.

The atmosphere immediately returned to normal.

"Sit down, today's breakfast is very plentiful, there are egg pancakes, glutinous rice cakes, and red bean paste buns," the mother said with a smile.

Mo Xueyao sat down in the chair with her head down, feeling as uneasy as if she had gotten the lowest score in the class on an exam.