The Quagmire of Desire: From Gambling Addict and Village Flower to Movie Queen

After the dim light bulb in the back room of the card room went out, life seemed to fast-forward.

Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling no longer have to wait until dark to go to the chess and card room.

They go during the day too.

Sometimes she would wear that sequined halter dress, and sometimes she would just put on Guo Daqiang's old undershirt, wearing nothing underneath, and then she would stroll over and sit down at the card table.

Guo Daqiang stopped pressuring them to repay their debts.

When Brother Wang and Brother Li's hands touched them all over, they would laugh and sometimes even lean into their arms.

"Brother Guo, you're having a bad day. How about giving me a little treat?" Liu Meiling said to Guo Daqiang as she turned around after losing a hand of cards.

Guo Daqiang laughed, slipping his hand inside her collar: "Here comes the sweet reward, doesn't it?"

Sun Xiaoyan watched from the side and smiled.

There were several hundred yuan piled up in front of her, the money she had just won.

For several days in a row, not only did they stop spending money, but they also won several thousand.

That feeling was like walking on clouds.

Light and airy, so comfortable.

They don't need to think about the 12,000 yuan they owe, or about being available at any time. Anyway, no one is asking them to pay back their debts now. They can play whenever they want and win whenever they want.

Sometimes, when she gets really into it, Sun Xiaoyan even feels that all the shame and fear she used to feel are just a joke.

How wonderful it is now.

They have cigarettes to smoke, alcohol to drink, money to win, and men to make them happy.

That night, it was just getting dark.

Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling left the chess and card room, preparing to go home.

Just as they rounded the old locust tree at the village entrance, a figure darted out of the shadows and blocked their way.

It's Li Laoliu.

He rubbed his hands together, his eyes scanning back and forth between the two women, and chuckled, "Xiaoyan, Meiling, you're back so late?"

Sun Xiaoyan frowned, ignored him, and tried to walk around him.

Li Laoliu took a step forward and blocked it again.

"What's the rush?" Li Laoliu lowered his voice. "I have something to tell you guys."

Liu Meiling crossed her arms and said, "Spit it out."

Li Laoliu looked around, then leaned closer, exuding a strong smell of sweat: "Don't think nobody in the village knows about what you two are up to with Guo Daqiang and the others."

Sun Xiaoyan's heart skipped a beat.

Seeing her expression change, Li Laoliu became even more smug: "I saw and heard everything. There was quite a commotion in the back room of the card room."

"What do you want to do?" Liu Meiling asked coldly.

"I don't want to do anything," Li Laoliu licked his lips, "It's just... I'm lonely by myself. If you two are sensible, come to my house tonight and serve me well, and I'll pretend I didn't see anything. Otherwise..."

He deliberately dragged out the sound.

Looking at his lewd face, Sun Xiaoyan suddenly found it a little funny.

They used to be afraid that Li Laoliu would peek at them and tell others.

Now?

Liu Meiling laughed first.

She took two steps forward, almost touching Li Laoliu, and poked his chest with her finger: "Li Laoliu, you?"

Li Laoliu was taken aback by her posture.

Liu Meiling reached out and deliberately pulled down the neckline of her skirt, revealing a patch of white skin underneath: "Want to complain? Go ahead! Go now! Go door to door and shout that Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling slept with Guo Daqiang, see if anyone pays any attention to you!"

Sun Xiaoyan walked over, turned to the side, lifted her skirt to reveal the edge of her thin, transparent underwear: "Brother Li, that's an outdated trick. Everyone in the village knows us. Why would you need to sue us?"

Li Laoliu's face turned bright red, and he opened his mouth, unable to speak.

He thought he could control them, but he didn't expect them to not care at all.

"Get lost!" Liu Meiling shoved him. "Get out of my way!"

Li Laoliu staggered, watched the two figures swaying away as they walked away, and spat out a mouthful of saliva.

Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling walked a short distance, glanced at each other, and burst into laughter.

"He wants to threaten us?" Liu Meiling laughed until tears almost came to her eyes. "He doesn't even look at the state we're in now."

"Exactly," Sun Xiaoyan laughed, "We've already given up, who's afraid of who?"

But soon, their smiles faded.

Rumors are like grass in spring; once the wind blows, they spread throughout the entire village.

The next day, Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling, wearing newly bought tight shorts and crop tops, walked from the east end of the village towards the chess and card room.

On the way, I encountered several women washing clothes by a well.

They were chatting and laughing, but when they saw Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling coming over, their voices immediately lowered.

As the two walked past, they heard muffled curses coming from behind.

"Pah! Shameless slut!"

"Dressed like that, who are you trying to impress? Your boobs are practically popping out!"

"You slut! You're filthy!"

Sun Xiaoyan paused for a moment, but didn't turn around.

Liu Meiling snorted and deliberately twisted her waist even more violently.

As I approached the convenience store, several men squatting by the door smoking stared intently at me.

"Xiaoyan, Meiling, you look great today!" a bald man shouted.

Another tall, thin man whistled, "How much per night? Name your price!"

The people around them burst into laughter.

Sun Xiaoyan's face flushed slightly, and she quickened her pace.

Liu Meiling turned around and gave the tall, thin man a flirtatious wink: "Can you afford the price?"

The men laughed even harder.

The tall, thin man stood up: "Why can't you afford it? Name your price!"

"Alright, alright," the shop owner stepped in to smooth things over, "Stop making a scene."

But that gaze was like syrup stuck to your skin, impossible to shake off.

As they approached the entrance of the chess and card room, Guo Daqiang happened to come out to get some water. He frowned when he saw them.

"You two come in."

Once inside, Guo Daqiang closed the door.

"Can you two tone it down a bit?" Guo Daqiang lit a cigarette. "Wearing clothes like that and wandering around the village, as if you're afraid no one will notice?"

Liu Meiling said nonchalantly, "So what if they know?"

"What?" Guo Daqiang exhaled a puff of smoke. "Your spittle can drown a person! You two are on my side now, so don't cause me any trouble!"

Sun Xiaoyan whispered, "We didn't do anything..."

"You haven't done anything yet?" Guo Daqiang glared at her. "What's the talk in the village? They're saying you're a public toilet, anyone who pays can use it!"

Sun Xiaoyan fell silent.

Guo Daqiang sighed, his tone softening slightly: "I know you don't care right now, but you should at least be careful. If things really escalate, it won't do anyone any good."

Despite the warnings, the rumors couldn't be stopped.

That afternoon, Sun Xiaoyan's mother-in-law went directly to the chess and card room.

She didn't go inside; she just stood at the doorway, her face as black as the bottom of a pot.

"Sun Xiaoyan! Come out here!"

Sun Xiaoyan felt a pang of anxiety, put down her cards, and went outside.

When her mother-in-law saw the tank top she was wearing, which barely covered anything, she was so angry that she trembled all over.

"You...you shameless! You've completely disgraced the Jiang family!"

A crowd of onlookers had already gathered around.

Sun Xiaoyan lowered her head: "Mom..."

"Don't call me Mom!" The mother-in-law slapped Sun Xiaoyan across the face.

It made a really loud snap.

Sun Xiaoyan's face was twisted to one side, burning with pain.

"Look at this! Look at this shameless slut!" the old woman pointed at her, her voice shrill. "The man works himself to the bone outside to earn money, and she stays home cheating on him! She's even become addicted! She comes to this filthy place every day!"

The onlookers pointed and whispered among themselves.

"Jianjun's wife seems quite honest..."

"What's there to be honest about? You've been Guo Daqiang's man for a long time."

"Tsk tsk, I heard there's more than one."

Sun Xiaoyan covered her face, tears welling up in her eyes, but she didn't cry.

The mother-in-law glared at her fiercely: "Our Jiang family doesn't need a daughter-in-law like you! Get out! Get out right now! Don't ever set foot in the Jiang family again!"

After saying that, the mother-in-law turned and left, her back trembling with anger.

Sun Xiaoyan stood there, feeling the gazes around her like needles piercing her.

Liu Meiling ran out and grabbed her: "Xiaoyan, are you alright?"

Sun Xiaoyan shook her head and forced a smile: "It's nothing."

That same evening, a disturbance broke out at Liu Meiling's house as well.

Her mother-in-law didn't hit her, but she threw all her clothes and blankets out into the yard.

"Our Liu family must have accumulated a lot of good karma to have married someone like you! Get out! Go wherever you want!"

Liu Meiling looked at the clothes scattered all over the floor and smiled.

She picked up the items one by one, stuffed them into a tattered woven bag, and then went out the door with the bag in her hand.

The two met under the old locust tree at the entrance of the village.

Sun Xiaoyan was also carrying a small bundle containing only a few pieces of clothing.

"You too..." Sun Xiaoyan looked at Liu Meiling's woven bag.

"Yeah," Liu Meiling lit a cigarette, "I got kicked out."

The two smoked in silence.

It was completely dark, with only a few lights on in the village.

None of those lights were lit for them.

"Where to?" Sun Xiaoyan asked.

"I don't know," Liu Meiling exhaled a puff of smoke, "I can't exactly sleep in the wilderness."

Just then, Guo Daqiang swayed over.

He glanced at the luggage in their hands and laughed: "Homeless?"

Sun Xiaoyan did not speak.

Liu Meiling hummed in agreement.

"I expected this," Guo Daqiang said. "I have an empty room in the backyard of my chess and card room. It used to be used to store junk, but it can be lived in after some cleaning. If you two don't mind, you can stay here for now."

Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling exchanged a glance.

They knew Guo Daqiang had ill intentions.

But now, do they have any other choice?

"Okay," Liu Meiling said first.

Sun Xiaoyan nodded as well.

The empty house was really empty.

There was only a broken wooden bed, a rickety table, and the newspapers pasted on the wall were all yellowed.

Guo Daqiang brought two old quilts and threw them on the bed.

"Just make do with it. It has water and electricity, but there's no toilet. You'll have to use a public toilet outside."

He left and closed the door.

Only Sun Xiaoyan and Liu Meiling remained in the room.

They sat on the edge of the bed, listening to the sounds of mahjong tiles being shuffled, men laughing and cursing, and a woman's shrill, teasing voice, though they couldn't tell who it was.

"Have we really come to this?" Sun Xiaoyan said softly.

Liu Meiling didn't say anything, but lit another cigarette.

After taking a few puffs, she finally spoke: "Xiaoyan, we can't stay here anymore."

"I know."

"I mean, we can't stay in this village anymore." Liu Meiling looked at her. "Look at the way those people looked at us today, what they said. We're like rats in the street here."

Sun Xiaoyan nodded.

She had sensed it long ago.

Previously, those gossips were only heard behind closed doors, but now they're out in the open.

"Tomorrow morning," Liu Meiling said, "we'll go to the provincial capital."

"provincial capital?"

"Yes," Liu Meiling's eyes lit up, "Let's go to the provincial capital! Nobody there knows us, we can start from scratch! I have hands and feet, what can't I do to make a living?"

Sun Xiaoyan's heart skipped a beat.

provincial capital.

That place I've only ever seen on TV.

Skyscrapers, bright lights and bustling activity.

"Where did you go...?" Sun Xiaoyan asked.

"I'll do anything!" Liu Meiling said. "Wait for tables, wash dishes, even... even if I were to work as a prostitute like those women in the county town, it would be better than staying here! At least no one would point their finger at me and call me a slut!"

Sun Xiaoyan thought for a moment.

Also.

Staying here will only bring scorn and disdain.

Going to the provincial capital is at least a way to make a living.

"Okay," Sun Xiaoyan made up her mind, "I'll leave first thing tomorrow morning."

The two lay on the broken wooden bed, covered with an old, musty-smelling quilt.

The clatter of mahjong tiles still echoed in the front hall, and laughter drifted in through the thin door panel.

Sun Xiaoyan stared at the dark ceiling with her eyes open.

She knew that her and Meiling's reputation in the village was completely ruined.

It's rotten to the core.

But it's okay.

Tomorrow, they will leave this wretched place.

Go to a completely new place where nobody knows them.

restart.