Forced to become a top influencer, I rely on my tu cao to ruin the cultivation world.

"Family members! Does anyone understand?! The quality of this batch of amateur participants is terrible!"

"That Li Qing is still crying. Can his tears drown the mountain-protecting formation?"

"Look! That Qi Refining Level 3 loser actually fell off his sword while flying! Hahaha, this is hilarious, who even watches this lousy show anymore?"

Jia Zhuang suddenly opened his eyes, his mind still lingering on the thrill of surfing the internet as a "top hater" a second ago. What came into view was not the familiar ceiling of the rented room from the online novel, but a sky shrouded in mist...?

He was sitting on a huge bluestone plaza, surrounded by handsome men and beautiful women dressed in white, exuding an ethereal aura. But strangely, each of them had a semi-transparent ID nameplate floating above their heads, such as [Senior Brother of Qingyun Sect - Aloof] and [Junior Sister of Hehuan Sect - Green Tea].

And next to these IDs, lines of colorful text floated by:

[Warning: This year's amateur contestants are terrible; the script is too obvious.]

Who's that crying baby? Can't they have some professionalism? I want to see a revenge story, a reborn protagonist showing off, and a murder-for-treasure plot!

[Is this the reality show "Seeking Immortality"? Did the investors run out of money? What kind of trashy amateurs did they choose?]

Jia Zhuang was stunned.

As a "top hater" in the modern entertainment industry, he immediately understood the current situation—he had transmigrated, and transmigrated into a cultivation world reality show controlled by modern capital!

Here, apart from him, there is no one who is a true cultivator; they are all actors!

[Ding! Host awakening detected.]

[The "Ultimate Mouth Substitute System" is binding... Binding successful!]

[This system is dedicated to maintaining the realism and joy of the cultivation world. As long as the host makes accurate comments, they can obtain "Honkai Points," which can be used for lotteries, exchanging cultivation points, and even modifying reality!]

[Current Task: Be the coolest person in the entire event during the spiritual root testing phase. Reward: A newbie gift pack.]

Before Jia Zang could process this series of information, a middle-aged man in a purple robe with a dignified face walked onto the high platform.

"quiet!"

The middle-aged man's voice was like thunder, making the square buzz.

"I am Wang Teng, an elder of the Alchemy Hall of the Qingyun Sect. Today is the day our sect recruits disciples. You are all ordinary people selected by the 'Seeking Immortality' program team. If you have the opportunity, you can join my Qingyun Sect and embark on the path of immortality!"

Elder Wang Teng waved his sleeve, and a huge black stone tablet rose in the center of the square—the Spirit Testing Stone Tablet.

"We will now begin testing your spiritual roots! Those whose names are called, please come forward and touch the stone tablet!"

The first one to go up was a handsome young man.

He nervously placed his hand on the stone tablet, which flickered a few times and emitted a faint white light.

"A mixed spiritual root of the five elements, with the lowest aptitude," Elder Wang Teng declared expressionlessly.

The boy turned deathly pale and immediately knelt on the ground, weeping bitterly: "Impossible! I'm a transmigrator! I have a system! I should have a Heavenly Spiritual Root!"

[Comments: Hahaha! This guy's too into character! A time traveler, huh?]

[Hilarious! This script is terrible; the time-travel trope is overused.]

Seeing this, Jia Zang's professional instincts compelled him to mentally complain:

"This isn't a time traveler, this is clearly a background actor who didn't get his lunchbox and is full of resentment. I suggest checking the background of the production team."

[Ding! Precise comment detected. 10 Honkai Impact Points gained.]

"Hmm?" Jia Zhuang's eyes lit up.

Can it really make you stronger?

The following tests were still boring.

The contestants, whether they were "useless jilted brides" or "retired master," all put on a great show, but the mockery in the comments section only intensified.

Until a young girl dressed in white with an ethereal air came onto the stage.

She is Su Qingxue, the "official female lead" of this year's "Ask Tao for Immortality," and also a favorite of investors.

She gracefully placed her hand on the stone tablet.

boom!

The stone tablet burst forth with dazzling seven-colored light, shooting straight into the sky!

"A Heavenly Grade Ice Spiritual Root! A once-in-ten-thousand-years find!" Elder Wang Teng's beard trembled with excitement. "Excellent! Excellent! Excellent! Miss Su, would you be willing to join my Qingyun Sect?"

Su Qingxue smiled slightly and winked at the camera: "This disciple is willing."

[Comments: Here she comes! The official favorite has arrived!]

[This spiritual root is obviously the result of paying for it.]

Even though I know it's scripted, I can still resist their good looks!

Jia Zhuang looked at Su Qingxue's standard "fake smile," and then at the deceived viewers in the comments section, and his professional instincts kicked in again.

"What kind of Heavenly Grade Ice Spirit Root is this? It's clearly added in post-production special effects. Even the flow of spiritual energy is unnatural. It's obviously a VIP exclusive skin."

[Ding! Targeted comment detected, 50 Honkai Impact Points gained!]

[Ding! Congratulations, host! Your吐槽 (tu cao, meaning to criticize or complain) value has reached 100. Newbie gift pack has been issued!]

[Do you want to open the new player gift pack?]

"Activate!" Jia Zhuang said without hesitation.

[Congratulations, host, you have obtained: a psionic tractor (modified version)!]

[Psionic Tractor: Forged from ancient black iron, equipped with a "Nine-Turn Golden Elixir Engine," it can reach a top speed of 1,000 kilometers per hour and possesses functions such as "sonic attack" and "spiritual energy shield." Note: This vehicle does not require refueling; it can be driven simply by injecting Honkai Value.]

Jia Zang: "..."

tractor?

Driving a tractor in the world of cultivation?

Does this system have some misunderstanding about "cultivating immortality"?

Before he could react, Elder Wang Teng on the platform called out, "Next, Jia Zhuang!"

Jia Zang took a deep breath, stood up, dusted himself off, and strode onto the platform.

His movement immediately attracted everyone's attention.

Unlike the others who exuded an ethereal aura, Jia Zhuang wore a black hooded sweatshirt, cargo pants, and Doc Martens boots, giving off a modern vibe that seemed completely out of place here.

[Comment: Hey, who's this? Dressed like a food delivery guy.]

[Is this an ordinary person? Why does he look like a time traveler?]

[Upstairs, you've been using the time-travel trope too much. This is definitely an extra hired by the production team.]

Jia Zang walked up to the spirit-testing stele, but instead of immediately placing his hand on it, he first raised an eyebrow at the camera.

"Elder Wang, I have a question before testing your spiritual roots."

Wang Teng frowned: "What is it?"

"Is this spirit-testing stone tablet old and in disrepair? I saw it flicker just now. Is it running out of memory? Should we clear the cache?"

Wang Teng: "..."

Su Qingxue: "..."

The entire room fell silent.

[Comments: Hahaha! Insufficient memory? Is this guy trying to be funny?]

[What the heck?! This stone tablet is an ancient artifact!]

Although he was talking nonsense, I actually found it somewhat reasonable? After all, the stone tablet did get stuck for a moment just now.

[Ding! Precise comment detected. 30 Honkai Impact Points gained.]

Ignoring everyone's reactions, Jia Zang placed his hand directly on the stone tablet.

At the same time, he silently chanted in his mind, "System, materialize the reward! Push this broken stone tablet aside!"

hum-

The stone tablet trembled violently, but this time, it didn't glow; instead…

"Rat-a-tat-tat-tat—"

A deafening roar came from inside the stone tablet, as if something was about to burst out of the stone!

"What's going on?!" Elder Wang Teng exclaimed in shock and quickly retreated.

The next second, a black light shot out from the stone tablet, and with a loud bang, it smashed the huge spirit-testing stone tablet to pieces!

Pebbles flew everywhere, and the dust settled.

A jet-black tractor with a wild design and blue flames shooting from its exhaust pipe suddenly appeared before everyone!

A sign was hanging on the front of the vehicle: [Psychic Tractor - Beginner Village Limited Edition]

The entire room fell silent.

Su Qingxue's fake smile froze on her face, and the corners of her mouth twitched slightly.

Elder Wang Teng's beard was half gone, and he stared wide-eyed at the "iron lump" in front of him.

The chat in the live stream went completely crazy:

[Holy crap! What the hell is this thing?!]

[A tractor?! A cultivator driving a tractor?! And it even smashed the spirit-testing stone tablet?!]

[These special effects... they're worth no more than 50 cents! But the physics and collision effects are pretty good!]

Wait, this tractor looks like it's spitting fire?!

Jia Zang looked at the "divine beast" in front of him and a wicked smile appeared on his lips.

He turned over, sat in the driver's seat, gripped the steering wheel, and gave a thumbs-up to the stunned crowd.

"Elder Wang, is this considered a Heavenly Grade Spiritual Root? After all... it consumes a lot of fuel."

[Ding! Congratulations, host, on completing your debut! You have gained 1000 Honkai Points!]

[The number of viewers in the live stream has exceeded 10!]

Jia Zang floored the accelerator.

"boom--"

The tractor roared, spewing out a blue flame, and carrying Jia Zang, sped towards the gates of the Qingyun Sect amidst the horrified gazes of the crowd.

Only a catchy, mesmerizing melody remains, echoing through the valley:

"You are the most beautiful cloud in my sky."

The Qingyun Sect was in chaos.