Unconventional blind dates

Chapter 100 Today in History (Seeking monthly votes!)

There was a long silence on the other end of the phone, as if they were shocked by Lu Li's words.

After a long while, Fang Yuebai tentatively asked, "Brother Li, did your illegitimate child come looking for you?"

Lu Li was first shocked by Fang Yuebai's amazing brain circuits, and then immediately launched a counterattack.

"Yeah, you're the one who gave birth to me, and you've already forgotten? What kind of mother are you?"

"Brother Li, I was wrong."

Fang Yuebai was the first to lose her composure.

She quickly tried to salvage the situation, saying, "Registering a child's birth is actually quite troublesome. It requires various documents, including a paternity test. Do you have any, Brother Li?"

"No, the other person isn't a child."

"There's no way to do that for now. I'll let you know when I come up with a solution."

"it is good."

After hanging up the phone, Lu Li sighed.

Without a household registration, one is considered an unregistered resident.

Unregistered residents do not have ID cards.

But in today's information age, you need an ID card for almost everything.

This includes booking hotel rooms and going to internet cafes.

Even train tickets are required.

Moreover, high-speed rail tickets have now basically entered the paperless era.

This means that Li Tingchan cannot enjoy many of the conveniences of modern society.

However, Li Tingchan said she had woken up many times in the past.

Could there be any trace of her in history?

Do it when you think of it.

Lu Li immediately went online to search for Li Tingchan's name.

There were quite a few results!

"A student from National Kyoto University? Who assassinated a high-ranking official of the old party?"

"A righteous man who defended the city? He and his master assassinated the Later Jin Khan outside Ningyuan City?"

"Did he follow his master to assassinate the Mongol Khan at the foot of Diaoyu Mountain?"

"That powerful?"

Lu Li was shocked when he found out what he had to do!

There have been quite a few people in history named Li Tingchan.

Moreover, he was basically doing the work of an assassin.

They basically fought their way from the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period all the way to the late Qing Dynasty and the Republic of China.

He's really ruthless!

However, most of them were vague and only mentioned briefly.

Moreover, although they may not appear to be the same person, Lu Li knew very well that they were all the same person!

As the saying goes, he discussed the road at Hangu Pass, executed Zhao Gao in Xianyang, challenged Xiang Yu to a duel at Gaixia, and killed Dong Zhuo in Chang'an.

She had never done any of these things.

At least it's not recorded in historical books.

"Master, are you talking about me?"

Lu Li turned around abruptly and found that Li Tingchan had appeared behind him at some point.

The female warrior's lips were shiny and oily; it was obvious she hadn't wiped her mouth after eating takeout.

Seeing Lu Li staring at her lips, her pretty face flushed, and she raised her coarse cloth sleeve to wipe her mouth.

"Wait!"

Lu Li grabbed her arm and pulled a tissue from beside the computer for her. "Use this."

"Hmm"

Li Tingchan frowned slightly. "Master, such good paper... just for wiping your mouth?"

She immediately launched into a lecturing mode: "My master has always been very wasteful. He would change his clothes to silk and satin if they were uncomfortable, and he couldn't eat without meat at every meal, or at least fish."

"And even when relieving themselves, they insist on using soft, expensive paper; they won't even use toilet paper."

She went on and on like a busybody, complaining endlessly.

But Lu Li remained unmoved.

Hilarious! Imagine sending a modern person from China back to ancient times, where they're dressed in clothes that rub against their skin, wearing uncomfortable straw sandals, and having to use toilet sticks (bamboo or wooden sticks) to wipe their bottom!

They often have a body odor, go for days without showering, and their face and hair are always shiny with oil; they might even have lice and fleas.

Who the hell could stand this?

Anyway, Lu Li couldn't stand it.

"Those aren't problems." He forcefully interrupted Li Tingchan's rambling, turning around and pointing to the monitor. "Do you recognize the words on this?"

"I know it. It's just simplified Chinese characters. You taught me that, Master."

Li Tingchan was quite proud. "A hundred years ago, I heard that many famous scholars were thinking about simplifying the characters so that everyone could recognize them. I just wanted to laugh at the time. Wasn't that what my master had already taught me?"

Lu Li blushed slightly, "Ahem, that's not important either."

He was so embarrassed that he almost dug a three-bedroom apartment out of his toes.

This feeling is like jumping up in front of Li Bai and reciting the line "It seems as if the Milky Way has fallen from the ninth heaven," and then Li Bai praises your poem as amazing.

How can you admit to something like this?

Anyway, Lu Liguang felt embarrassed just thinking about it and started picking at his feet.

He continued pointing at the screen, "How do you know this is about you?"

Right now, he's looking at information about Lao Tzu leaving Hangu Pass.

The above only describes Lao Tzu's discussions with Guan Yinzi and others on the Dao, and his later work, the "Tao Te Ching".

This one sentence doesn't mention Li Tingchan at all.

Li Tingchan pointed her slender white finger at the words "Waiting for someone" on the screen, "It's right here, Master was there too."

Lu Li: "."

So why did I appear in the Eastern Zhou period?

And to be honest, Lu Li has a clear understanding of himself.

If the discussion is about "future" development, he can give some points, but he can't go into depth.

But if we're talking about philosophy or something...

When he was in college, his classmates in the philosophy department were either assigned to other majors or came from wealthy families.

"Alright."

He decided to throw caution to the wind and asked, "What are they like?"

"He's just an old man with a long beard, what else could he be?" Li Tingchan said nonchalantly. "Back then, Master offered them gold, but they refused it. When I went to argue with them, they acted all disdainful, like they didn't want to talk to us. If Master hadn't stopped me, I would have beaten that old man up!"

Lu Li: "."

That would be a huge crime!

"What else have you done?" Lu Li was a little numb.

"Later, there was a little brat named Zheng, I think it was during the time of the Zhao Kingdom. His master said he was going to teach him to be a good emperor. At that time, he even asked his master what an emperor was again."

"But after Master finished speaking, he wouldn't listen. Master, you showed him a skill, and then he started clamoring to go with you, saying he wanted to learn how to fly in the sky too."

Li Tingchan covered her mouth and chuckled, "Master, your expression was so funny back then, it looked like your face turned white. Then he kept pestering me, and Master had no choice but to agree. As a result, he woke me up that very night and we ran away!"

"It seems like you really don't want to have anything to do with him, Master."

Lu Li nodded. "That's what the sparrows eat."

Trying to trick the First Emperor into cultivating immortality? That's utterly ridiculous.

"Anything else?"

"There was this kid named Lü Fengxian who said he wanted to spar with Master. I beat him up, and then Master gave him a halberd and said something like, 'We don't have a Signal Axe or Frostmourne right now, so we'll have to make do with this for now.'"

Lu Li's lips twitched.

That certainly seems like something he would do.

Once the conversation started, Li Tingchan couldn't stop.

"Back then, Master, you took me all over the world to find little brats to beat up. I don't know why, but when you arrived at a place, you would ask about the name, and after you found out, you would beat up the kid with that name, and you would say that you felt a great sense of accomplishment."

Lu Li was already numb.

So, I've done things like punching six-year-old Lu Bu, kicking eight-year-old Guan Yu, and beating up Changshan boy Long?

So disgusting!

What a damn bastard!

"And there's more!" Li Tingchan exclaimed, thoroughly amused. "Master, let me tell you all about it!"

Lu Li: "."

Fine, he wanted to hear what other despicable things he had done.

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Although it will most likely sink to the bottom.

But I still want one!

(End of this chapter)