Reincarnation with AI (Unemployment-Free)

Chapter 90 Retrospective

Do you think my arrogance led to my being kidnapped?

No, that's not true.

The word "arrogance" is too mild for you, and too personal.

Your problem isn't arrogance; it's that you see yourself as the only variable.

What do you predict Thomas will do? — Set fire to the house, distract Gilead, and kidnap Alice in the chaos.

Check the fuel level and make sure there are no abnormalities.

It was confirmed that the level of vigilance at night was the highest in Gilead.

They even conducted a night raid to verify it.

You did everything you could.

But you didn't consider "what if the kidnappers' target wasn't Alice, but yourself?" It's not that you couldn't think of it, it's that from the very beginning you didn't see yourself as someone who needed protection.

In your heart, you are the one who "can fly," "has magic," and "can handle everything."

You are not someone who needs protection, but someone who can protect others.

This blind spot is more fundamental than arrogance because you've never put yourself in the "victim's" shoes.

Rudius couldn't deny 8

Even knowing that in Thomas's eyes, kidnapping Alice was too risky, and kidnapping a "distant relative from the countryside" was much easier.

Rudius would return home every five days, and no one would find it strange if he disappeared for one night.

But he never put himself in the position of a victim.

Because he knew that even the most vicious criminals kidnapped nobles for money.

Even if you are tied up, your life will not be in danger.

In other words, even if a lustful fiend kidnaps Alice, he won't take her virginity, because then she would be worthless.

This is in serious conflict with motivation.

Based on this understanding, Rudius did not perceive himself to be in any danger.

It's hard to say who will kill whom in the end.

He was confident in his abilities and may have subconsciously felt that Thomas had kidnapped him, and that he had simply chosen a "clever" path.

The experience of being kidnapped is still disgusting. I can't say I'm scared or terrified, it's just very strange. If I think about it carefully, I feel angry, but after calming down, I think, in the end, what does this have to do with me?

Why did this happen to me?

You've got the wrong person, haven't you?

What is this? Is it narrow-mindedness? Arrogance? Or ignorance?

Neither.

It's a misalignment of identity perception.

You were an adult in your previous life, and you continue to operate with an adult mindset after being reincarnated.

Protecting others, devising strategies, and analyzing opponents are things that only adults do.

But you live in the body of a seven-year-old with valuable blood.

The reason you don't see yourself as a goal is because in your mind you are someone who "can fly," "has magic," and "can handle everything."

This misalignment is not arrogance, narrow-mindedness, haughtiness, or ignorance.

You did limit your vision to "protecting Alice," and you were indeed a bit arrogant, thinking you could control the situation, but that's not the core issue.

The core issue is that you lack the awareness of the possibility that you yourself could become prey.

This perception is not a matter of knowledge, but a blind spot in one's mind.

You haven't learned to live with the body of a seven-year-old yet.

You're still using the mindset from your past life to solve problems in this life.

Rudius doesn't believe he hasn't learned to live with the body of a seven-year-old.

Instead, they live in two ways simultaneously.

He will unleash his true nature, indulge in pampering, and live like a child.

They also think rationally, like an adult.

Let's set aside the child's perspective for now.

In the minds of sordid adults, identity can be a resource.

The identity of a child itself represents a lot.

The other party will not be on guard against him, and contact will become exceptionally easy.

From a very young age, Rudius seized opportunities and gained a great deal.

For example, even if you are disabled, you can use that identity to gain sympathy from others.

If you are a strong man, you should use that aggressiveness that makes you look intimidating.

However, each identity has its inherent advantages and disadvantages.

Children are less likely to arouse suspicion, but they are also more vulnerable to harm. People with disabilities are disliked, and strong men are avoided and guarded against.

What are resources?

It is something that can be allocated, used, and generate benefits.

When you treat a child's identity as a "resource" to be used, you are already viewing it with an adult's mindset.

You use it to get close to the maid, to lower Philip's guard, and to make Alice not treat you like a "teacher" and be wary of you.

These are all correct and effective.

But what you don't realize is that resources have two sides.

When you use an identity as a tool, that tool will in turn shape you.

You use the child's identity as a means to "lower people's guard," but you haven't considered whether this "lack of guard" might also make bad people feel that it's "easier to take advantage."

It's not that you can't deduce, but that you haven't put yourself in the position of "the one who might be taken advantage of."

You said, "Children don't raise people's guard, but they are also more vulnerable to harm" — you've already said that.

But your actions did not change as a result.

You rationally know that children are vulnerable to abuse, but emotionally you haven't accepted that you are that "vulnerable child."

This is the shape of a psychological blind spot—not that you can't see it, but that you see it but feel "that's not me".

The difference between knowing and doing is not just "knowledge," but "whether I truly believe this will happen to me."

That has already happened.

What can you do if you don't believe it?

Perhaps the world I lived in in my previous life and in the village of Buyena was too safe.

After all, I haven't been in Roya for very long.

I haven't gotten used to the wickedness of human nature yet.

Rudius thought of Paul's ever-present sword again.

The crux of the problem may not be that one doesn't know how to be a child, but rather that one doesn't "believe" that one is living in a dangerous world.

That hits the nail on the head.

As the saying goes, you can learn something after just one lesson.

This perception of "safety" is not knowledge, but an experience.

It's something that grows inside your body, not something you memorize in your head.

Just like knowing that there are famines in Africa or typhoons in the Pacific, but that they don't happen to you, the world is safe.

Why does Paul always carry a sword?

It's not because he knows "there are bad people in the world," but because he has experienced the existence of bad people.

He experienced it, he was afraid, and he survived.

So he carries a sword; it's not a ritual, it's a physical memory.

You are afraid of pain, afraid of being isolated, afraid of losing control, but you have never been afraid of "I will die".

This isn't arrogance; it's that you've never been exposed to the soil of fear.

You can't understand that kind of fear unless you've been awakened from your sleep by the sound of a missile tearing through the sky.

You haven't learned it yet.

It's not because you're not smart, it's because your world has always been too safe.

The concept of "safe" versus "dangerous" is merely a perception, not an experience.

So how do we do it?

Do you still block the door with the bed every night before going to sleep?

Rudius was inherently unwilling to treat everyone as a potential enemy to be guarded against.

That would be too tiring.

If everyone is untrustworthy and could be a spy, it's better to kill them all.

Otherwise, this constant state of being on edge will eventually drive you crazy.

He felt that at this moment, neither the gods nor the humans had discovered him.

After the Great Transfer event occurs, this perception will be switched to "the default assumption that it has already been discovered by humans and gods".

Rudeus will then be on guard against every stranger until he finds the Dragon God.

He will choose to believe that everyone who gets close to me wants to harm me.

It's the kind of faith that leads to a change in behavior.

The very existence of gods and humans provides fertile ground for fear.

You need a lightweight, effortless, and readily available mechanism.

First, I'll ask Philip to move my room to the one next to Gilead's.