The Daily Life of a Salted Fish Assassin in Anime Crossovers

Feeling uneasy, Jiang Hang returned to the office, took a shower, and then lay on the bed to enter the virtual space.

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I just thought it was interesting, so I posted it for everyone to see. You don't need to take it seriously.

Chapter 28: Do you know how many times I was poisoned to death last night?

The next day, the sun rose as usual.

Jiang Hang opened his eyes.

“Three hundred and five times,” Jiang Hang struggled to get out of bed and complained to his system. His worries from last night had come true. The so-called poison training really was just putting poisons in front of him and making him try them. These so-called poisons were basically various modern chemical products, solids, liquids, and gases. As long as they were poisonous, they were all counted as knowledge required for the skill of mastering poison.

"Do you know how I got through this night? I died 305 times before I passed the final test of the Poison Master."

This is after the system has already instilled knowledge into his head. After dying so many times, he was finally able to fully understand the extra knowledge in his head.

This is also because the time calculation in the virtual space is not synchronized with reality, and the system has also weakened his perception of time in the virtual space. Otherwise, if this knowledge were placed in reality, who knows how long it would take him to fully master it.

"This is a necessary process. Only in this way can the host be sufficiently vigilant against various poisons in the future. As an assassin... detective, this is a necessary process. So, host, do you understand?"

The moment the system uttered the word "Na," both Jiang Hang and the system fell silent.

"..." Even though it was still summer, Jiang Hang felt a cold wind blowing in front of him.

"...A program error was detected, and emergency repairs have begun... The repair is complete. Please continue to use this system with confidence. System maintenance compensation has been sent. Please check your system."

Jiang Hang had gotten used to the unchanging, rigid answers and classic slip of the tongue from the system, but he never expected that his own big-eyed assassin system would also resort to the same old tricks, which was simply killing him.

This feeling was so intense that Jiang Hang felt like he was about to die from the poison on the spot.

Compared to this toxic system, Jiang Hang, the newly minted master of poison, can only admit defeat.

However, even so, we still need to check the compensation the system uses to cover things up.

"System maintenance compensation: 100 million yen, a legendary hidden blade set, along with hidden blade mastery skills (advanced) and one virtual hidden blade training session."

Then Jiang Hang saw a set of hidden blades with a metallic sheen appear in front of him.

Jiang Hang couldn't help but complain in his heart that the system had really gone all out with this compensation.

I won't even mention the 100 million yen figure. That legendary hidden blade is definitely no ordinary thing. There's also the skill that can instantly max out his hidden blade skills, plus virtual space training. The system is really going all out to shut me up.

Thinking this way, Jiang Hang even began to consider whether there was a chance to get the system to create some bugs to trick him into acquiring, cough cough, some advanced skills.

However, the system did indeed invest heavily, but... thinking about it carefully, the hidden blade is a complete trap.

Let's not even get into the tired clichés about assassins versus detectives. Just tell me, what use is a hidden blade in 21st-century Tokyo, Japan?

Even with the "legendary" prefix, it's still an assassination tool. Is this some kind of plan to wipe out the entire Black Organization with just a hidden blade?

System, times have changed!

He was just an ordinary detective and assassin, not the Shimada Genji who shouted, "There's a gay guy unzipping my pants!"

Considering that ninjas are basically equivalent to assassins in Japan, if you really give him the ability to deflect even rockets, it would be better to give him a pair of Rinnegan. He could just use Chibaku Tensei to send the entire Black Organization into outer space, and then casually say that there are limits to being a detective and that he is no longer a detective. Wouldn't it be wonderful to then transform into a behind-the-scenes mastermind who "shows off his divine powers in public and is the only one who knows the law"?

But I digress. Let's get back to the hidden blade. Two hundred years ago, it would have been a very useful tool, but now it's probably only good for cosplay.

Moreover, it's too dangerous to use as a cosplay prop. Back in the game, the Eighth Master accidentally cut off his ring finger, which led to the Assassin Brotherhood using the cutting off of the ring finger as an initiation ritual for over a thousand years.

Although it was improved later, Jiang Hang was still worried that it might suddenly malfunction when it was strapped to his hand. Even though the earliest hidden blades were not strapped to the wrist but to the back of the hand, there was still a risk.

For example, while scratching his head, the switch on the hidden blade suddenly malfunctioned and popped out automatically, and Jiang Hang became the first assassin to successfully commit suicide with the hidden blade.

In these places, Jiang Hang would inexplicably develop some paranoia.

In this regard, the E-Uncle assassin outfit that was previously awarded was not only exquisitely crafted, several levels higher than those ordinary cosplay outfits, but also had a certain defensive capability, and ordinary cold weapons might not be able to break through its defenses.

Even if there were no Assassin's Creed games in this world, as long as you wear that outfit to a comic convention, you'll definitely be the coolest person there.

Now this outfit is also displayed on the clothes rack in the lobby of the firm as the firm's symbol. Sometimes when Jiang Hang has a fit of chuunibyou (middle school syndrome), he will wear this outfit to the rooftop to do some parkour at night.

As for the hidden blade, it can probably only be kept in the agency as a collectible. Taking it out casually might be mistaken for a murder weapon by the police, and it wouldn't even pass through security at a comic convention.

At this moment, perhaps even the system couldn't stand Jiang Hang's complaints anymore and issued a prompt.

"The items rewarded by the system are automatically bound to the host. After the hidden blade is assembled, it can be freely extended and retracted according to the host's wishes and will not pose a danger to the host. In addition, the host can also choose the sharpened state of the hidden blade. Please use it with confidence."

After hearing the system's explanation, Jiang Hang immediately became convinced that it was really good.

After changing into a loose-fitting outfit and concealing the hidden blade beneath his sleeve, Jiang Hang seemed to have found a new toy, constantly controlling the blade to thrust and retract in his hand.

Jiang Hang was still playing with his hidden blade when Shizuka Sakaki brought him breakfast to work.

He raised his arm and extended it towards Shizuka Sakaki, then suddenly thrust out his hidden blade, the gleaming razor startling Shizuka.

"Jiang Hangjun, what is this thing again? It looks dangerous..."

"It's for self-defense. After all, as a detective, sometimes when you encounter danger and don't have any weapons on hand, this thing might come in handy," Jiang Hang said to the other person with a serious expression.

However, what he said seemed a bit too frightening, making Shizuka Sakaki's expression turn somewhat strange.

Why would a normal person prepare something like this for self-defense?

He took the breakfast from her hand, but judging from Shizuka Sakaki's wary and cautious manner towards his wrist, it seemed as if she was worried that the hidden blade might suddenly pop out.

"Just kidding. I only just got my hands on this thing, so I played with it for a while. I don't usually carry this thing around. It's unsharpened, so it won't hurt anyone." Jiang Hang said this as he took off the hidden blade that he had been playing with all morning and showed it to Shizuka Sakaki, revealing the completely unsharpened blade.

Sakaki Shizuka finally breathed a sigh of relief.

However, there was something still off about the expression on her face.

After fidgeting in her seat for a while, she whispered a question to Jiang Hang.

"I heard... when Yuno and you went to the art museum yesterday, someone was murdered inside?"

She thought that this was the reason why Jiang Hang had specially created such a "self-defense tool".

“You could actually be a little more formal, like saying a murder occurred in the art museum, since we’re a detective agency,” Jiang Hang replied, which was a confirmation of Shizuka Sakaki’s question.

As he spoke, Jiang Hang glanced at the breakfast that Shizuka Sakaki had brought for him: milk and oat bread—a perfectly acceptable combination.

He had originally intended to use his poison proficiency, which he had gained after dying 305 times yesterday, to check if what he was eating was safe. However, after testing for a while, he could only conclude that the breakfast was not nutritionally balanced.

In other words, if we look at the "mastery of poison" from another perspective, knowing what foods are bad for the body and then selectively avoiding those unhealthy food combinations, doesn't that mean he's now a semi-health guru?

However, after thinking about those big shots who meticulously calculate the calories of everything they eat each day, Jiang Hang decided that he should just eat whatever he wanted. He admired those big shots, but he didn't have the willpower to live that kind of life.

"I knew it... I texted Yuno last night, and she only replied with a 'complicated feelings' emoji this morning..." Meanwhile, Shizuka Sakaki nervously licked her lips.

"I saw it on the morning news this morning... Did Yuno go to the crime scene with you?"

"To be precise, I was the one who calmed the murderer down at the crime scene, while Mu Chun, worried about my safety, went to the crime scene with the police. Then she went to the toilet and vomited for half an hour before coming out."

Jiang Hang said this casually, but was immediately refuted.

"—It didn't take half an hour...it was only twenty minutes at most..."

Such a rebuttal is completely lacking in force.

Jiang Hang looked at Koharu Yuno, who was a little later than usual.

The other person seemed to be in a bad state; their hair wasn't combed properly, and their collar was a little messy, as if they had rushed over in a hurry.

"Yuno... what's wrong with you? Didn't you sleep well last night?" Shizuka Sakaki instinctively assumed that Yuno Kiharu was so disturbed by the crime scene that she couldn't sleep at night and that's why she looked like this in the morning.

However, Yoshino Koharu blushed and shook her head somewhat embarrassedly.

"I didn't have any nightmares. I just slept too soundly, and when I woke up I realized I was going to be late, so I quickly got up and rushed over... hahaha..."

She gave a slightly embarrassed smile.

"???" Shizuka Sakaki wondered if she had misheard.

It's not that I can't sleep because I'm scared, but because I'm sleeping too well.

Is this what a girl who is visiting a murder scene for the first time should say?

Chapter 29: Eri Kisaki Law Firm

Upon learning that Yoshino Kiharu had used a peculiar meditation sleep method under Jiang Hang's guidance the previous night and slept until after 8 a.m., Shizuka Sakaki breathed a sigh of relief. It turned out that she hadn't transmigrated; this world was still the same world.

But after she came to her senses, Shizuka Sakaki felt that something was wrong.

Meditation sleep method? How can such a thing as meditation sleep exist in this world? It sounds like it's fake.

"It's true, I've tried it myself, and it's really effective. I was a little scared when I was lying in bed at night, but after trying the postures and breathing techniques in the meditation sleep method, I fell asleep immediately. I don't even know when I fell asleep."

"And I didn't have any nightmares last night. If I hadn't been woken up by hunger, I feel like I could have slept until noon today."

"That's because your sleep quality hasn't been very good lately, so you felt like you didn't get enough sleep the first time you tried it. In the future, sleeping six or seven hours a day will give you enough energy for the whole day." Jiang Hang pointed to Mu Chun Yuno's messy hair. "Alright, alright, go to the bathroom and tidy yourself up. If guests come over later, who knows who they'll think you are."

After Yoshino went to the bathroom to tidy herself up, Jiang Hang also felt a mysterious gaze from Shizuka Sakaki.

“Do you want to learn? I can teach you,” Jiang Hang knew what Shizuka Sakaki wanted to say as soon as he saw her, and immediately put on a ‘kind’ smile. “But you’ll have to come out with me later. Let Kiharu stay at the office today. By the way, you have your driver’s license with you, right?”

Originally, Sakagi Shizuka was quite happy to hear Jiang Hang's words. She was going to participate in the next audition in a few days. Because of her failure last time, she had been so nervous at night that she couldn't sleep well. If she had this meditation sleep method, it should be able to help her get a good night's sleep the night before the audition.

Upon hearing Jiang Hang's next words, she subconsciously shrank her neck.

Yesterday, Yuno Kiharu went out with him and encountered a murder. Today, she went out with Jiang Hang. Will she also encounter some strange events later?

"I'm bringing it, Jiang Hang-jun...where are you going later?"

Jiang Hang could tell what Shizuka was worried about just by looking at her. He really wanted to tell her that it was all Conan's fault, or more accurately, the fault of a certain manga artist, and that it had nothing to do with him. But no one would believe him if he said that.

"I need to go to a very prestigious law firm to consult with them about something."

Sakaki Shizuka's mind immediately conjured up strange ideas like "a famous lawyer's locked-room death case," and she looked at Jiang Hang with trembling eyes.

Unlike Yoshino Koharu, who gets sleepy as soon as she starts reading mystery books, Shizuka Sakaki takes her job quite seriously. Recently, she's been reading classic Japanese mystery novels, the most iconic of which are all sorts of unbelievable locked-room murder cases.

"Don't look at me like that. I promise there won't be any accidents this time. You don't think I'm some kind of jinx, do you?" He absolutely wouldn't take the blame for Conan's actions. He wasn't a jinx; he just happened to be with one.

With a gloomy-looking Shizuka Sakaki, they first went to the art museum to retrieve the 86 that had been parked there yesterday.

Standing at the entrance of the Mihua Art Museum, Jiang Hang sighed softly.

Since the murder yesterday afternoon, the art museum has been temporarily closed. At this time, there are still many police officers going in and out of the scene, obviously there is still a lot of information that needs to be recorded.

Without disturbing the police officers who were on duty, Jiang Hang sat in his ordinary 86 and had Sakaki Shizuka drive to Eri Kisaki's office.

Speaking of Eri Kisaki, Jiang Hang thought of something.