I am weak and friendly

Chapter 428 Recruitment! Tang Yiping's First Elimination Team Member

Tang Yiping felt that he had underestimated the hellish nature of the "Survival Guide for the Weak".

No, what are you people after if you want to join the Cleanup Squad?
Are you just looking for something to eat, or are you just looking for someone to take advantage of and control you?
"So, Lord Li Ke Boren, would you like to choose something delicious?"

Tang Yiping noticed that Stoka was drooling.

You users of the "Survival Guide for the Weak" have all been warped by this system!
"Of course not! Do you think I'm that kind of person?" Tang Yiping said righteously, "I'm just planning to find myself a teacher."

With that thought in mind, Tang Yiping looked at the recruitment interface.

The recruitment interface features a very complex screening system.

At the top of the recruitment interface, there are three checkboxes with the following text:

Current available recruitment numbers: 2,847,593,716,942

Number of people available for conscription: 1,923,408,567

Available personnel: 47,291

Tang Yiping remained quite calm about the number, after all, the number of users of the "Guide to the Survival of the Weak" had reached a level that was beyond human comprehension.

The number of people that can be recruited is only in the trillions, it's just a drop in the ocean!
Tang Yiping glanced back and saw in the system's description: "...All steps have been verified by a total of 75484220021549870120078 users..."

Yes, the number of users has indeed increased significantly...

Tang Yiping counted and found that those qualified to be recruited were probably one in several hundred million of all users.

He should be the strongest among all users.

It's unclear what criteria are used to determine who can be conscripted.

The number of personnel that can be mobilized is roughly the same as the current number of active-duty cleanup teams.

Only 47,000.

This proportion is frighteningly small.

Tang Yiping suddenly understood why these elimination team members, who might face the risk of being eaten, were still willing to join the elimination team. Although he didn't know what privileges the system would give them, Tang Yiping himself, as a fake terrorist elimination team member, had already obtained many privileges, such as collecting taxes and an immeasurable amount of [Original Dust].

Even if these 47,000+ cleanup team members have far fewer privileges than ordinary users, they would probably still possess resources that ordinary users cannot even imagine.

He's second only to one person and above billions of others.

However, choosing the right one from so many potential candidates seems to require careful selection.

With that in mind, I selected all three options: recruitment, requisition, and transfer, and then looked at the interface below.

To be honest, this process is a bit tiring on the eyes, because in addition to the system itself, the recruitment interface is also covered with a dense swarm of [stacked insects].

Tang Yiping could understand why the [Stacking Insects] were all gathered here.

These little guys who were infected by Tang Yiping will instinctively look for bugs, and this recruitment system, which has been cracked by some unknown force, must have a lot of bugs, otherwise it would not be so easy to hack.

Tang Yiping really wanted to complain. He had his own [Stacking Worm] and could use it to debug, so why couldn't the developers of this [Survival Guide for the Weak] use [Stacking Worm] to debug and fix the bugs? Being hacked every day was simply shameful.

Tang Yiping searched carefully among these [Stacking Insects] for a long time but couldn't find the "Intelligence" option. After searching for a while longer, he finally found the "Cognitive Level" option.

Hmm... it really is called cognitive level.

After Tang Yiping clicked on it, he found that the filter options were: "Single point, linear, high dimension, multidimensional, dimension breaking, rule, law, omniscience..."

This is probably how the "Survival Guide for the Weak" categorizes cognitive levels.

Single point = Lola, linear = oneself...

Tang Yiping: "..."

Mouth!

I'm only one level higher than Lux?
With Lola's tiny head, the size of a walnut, and an IQ that seems to consist only of eating, how could she be a level below him?
She's only slightly smarter than a goldfish!

Tang Yiping could hardly believe it.

He had thought he was at least two or three levels higher than Lola.

On the contrary, the gap on the other side was larger than he had imagined...

He originally thought that the so-called multidimensionality should be one level higher than his linear thinking.

After all, judging from Stoka's tone, this person was roughly at the same level as himself.

But now it seems they've gone up two levels?

There are only a few levels in total!
Mouth!

Stoka went too far!
He felt looked down upon.

He asked Stoka, "What rank are you?"

In Tang Yiping's opinion, Stoka was at most a broken dimension.

"Too much is the rule."

It can't be any higher.

“Our race now only possesses cognitive abilities at the level of laws…” Stoka whimpered and lowered his head, lamenting, “Once, we were one of the near-omniscient cosmic overlords… The glory of the past has all vanished…”

What does "went away woo-woo-woo" mean?

I'll beat you to death!

Tang Yiping felt that Stoka was definitely showing off!

What shocked him even more was that he thought the dog was already very capable, but it turned out to be even more capable than he had imagined.

What? This dog is actually a near-omniscient being?

But am I just a linear being?
Tang Yiping: "..."

He was emo for a while.

There's a sense of indignation, like everyone else getting into top-tier universities like 985 and 211, while you're stuck with the humble college near the market.

No wonder I couldn't learn Mathematical Analysis III!
When people are powerless, all they can do is rage in vain.

"What kind of lousy interface is this?!" Tang Yiping could only vent his anger on this lousy interface.

His aesthetic intuition absolutely forbade him to ignore this ugly interface!

Even a weak product manager like Brother Ban would be driven to tears by how ugly this filtering interface is!

He's made up his mind; the first thing he'll change is this interface!

With that in mind, he first chose "high dimension" as the filtering criterion.

then……

Nothing came out.

Is this...broken?

Or is it that my filtering method is incorrect?

Or is there a delay in the output?
This broken interface doesn't provide any instructions or explanations at all, does it?

Could this be a bug?

Tang Yiping fiddled with this filtering interface for a long time before finally discovering...

The reason there were no results is that none of the candidates on the entire list possessed cognitive abilities at the "high-dimensional" level.

No.

not even one.

Tang Yiping wanted to convince himself that it was because Gao Wei was too smart, but his reason told him that self-deception was useless.

As it turns out, someone with an intelligence level a whole dimension higher than his was simply not qualified to be recruited as a cleanup team member.

After Tang Yiping set the filter to "multi-dimensional", a dense array of options immediately appeared.

The above shows that the following are available for recruitment: ...

No, that number is too long, Tang Yiping was too lazy to look at it.

He randomly clicked on a few other options, such as "Original Size" and "Rule Touched," among dozens of categories. He didn't understand what they meant, but every single one he selected was the most powerful one below.

Because the specifications were maximized, the numbers decreased rapidly.

It seems that there aren't many candidates who are strong in other aspects but have low intelligence (Tang Yiping: Who said they have low intelligence?!).

He kept filtering until the very end, and found that there were still two left. This was a real problem.

For someone who suffers from decision paralysis, choosing between two options might be harder than choosing one from hundreds.

Tang Yiping clicked on the last filter category.

"Flavor Appreciation".

In the last item, only two are still lit up.

"Unpalatable" and "juicy and delicious".

Anyone would know which one to choose.

When you don't know what to choose, just pick the one that tastes good!
After the final selection was completed, only one candidate remained in front of Tang Yiping:
ID: Van Lag-G1178945623-C
Codename: Universal Barbarian

Tags: [Plump and Juicy], [Perfect Venting Target], [Law-Based Meat Shield], [Heavy Foundation], [Space Spike], [Dimensional Mount], [High-Value Asset], [High-Energy Demolition Machine], [Absolute Obedience], [Low Intelligence]

Tang Yiping: ...

What an expensive item I chose for myself!

Plump and juicy, perfect punching bag, meat shield, mount...

This person doesn't seem like someone who could teach me Mathematical Analysis III at all.

Should I switch to another one?
……

While Tang Yiping was struggling with his decision, one of the eyes had already silently arrived outside the bubble space where Earth was located.

"Where is he? Li Ke Boren...where is he? Oh, I found him."

That eye, outside the bubble space and through the barrier of the bubble space, was staring intently at Tang Yiping.

Just then, Stoka stood up with a "whoosh".

"What's wrong, Stoka?" Tang Yiping asked.

"Woo-chih..." Stoka shook its head, slowly squatted down again, and buried its head in its front paws.

Outside the bubble space, the eye that had been locking onto Tang Yiping had long since disappeared.

It has already gone far away.

"Hiss... He's definitely acting strange!"

Who is that person next to him?
Even if you descend in a cybernetic body, you can still detect my spying?

It seems that this method is no longer working...

I need to find a different way to approach him...

The eyes floating in the "background" outside the bubble space narrowed, and lines of information flowed through them:
"Searching for available prosthetics."

"Prosthetic body search failed. No usable prosthetic bodies are available in the current area."

what happened?

How come there are no prosthetic bodies here? I remember running a prosthetic body business here for a long time, renting out hundreds of prosthetic bodies.

Could it be that the little parasite inside the spores discovered my prosthetic body business?
It has such audacity!

Huh? Where's that little woodworm?

Wait, the bubble space spores I placed in the prosthetic body are gone too!

This Li Ke Boren has such a meticulous mind; he discovered the seed I planted long ago and cleared it out in advance.
The eyes in the void looked around in surprise and uncertainty, clearly anxious and uneasy.

Otherwise, how about seizing a prosthetic body that has already been rented out?

Just as the eyeball was about to do so, it suddenly became alert.

and many more!

This is a trap!

He must have set traps in all the prosthetic bodies available now, just waiting for me to fall into them.

I understand now, he must have set up access restrictions!
hiss……

Li Ke Bolen is a good opponent!
"Hehehehehehehehehe..." From the "background" flowing outside the bubble space, the eyeball emitted a chilling laugh. "Li Ke Boren, you are very powerful, worthy of being my opponent. Unfortunately, you have met me..."

If there isn't a prosthetic body here, why not just send another one?
Although it will take time, but...

I am very patient, I have plenty of patience.

……

In his dormitory at Chuanling University, Tang Yiping had no idea what had happened.

He is continuing his recruitment efforts.

Van Lager's personal profile is quite long, but it also reveals a lot of information.

Level: Specialist

Identity: Cleanup Team Member

Belongs to: Oren-56
Overall rating: C
Survival Profession: [Loyal Servant]

Specialized Profession: Firewalker

Skills: [Extreme Endurance] E, [Reading Senses] D, [Self-Sacrifice] F, [Energy Saving Mode] D, [Suffering a Loss is a Blessing] D, [Silent Obedience] D (Combined skills: [Extreme Endurance] x [Reading Senses])
Upon seeing this, Tang Yiping gasped.

Specialists are the next level of professionals, and this Vanrag is clearly a serving cleanup crew member. His current superior is named Oren-56.

Of course, having an organization now isn't a problem; I can mobilize it myself.

His survival profession and specialization profession are both interesting, but they don't seem to be very strong.

But when Tang Yiping saw the skills, he lost his composure.

According to the evaluation philosophy and system of the "Survival Guide for the Weak," this guy hasn't learned a single C-level or higher skill, and he even has an F-level skill by his side.

From this perspective, he is definitely a true powerhouse!
I really don't understand why such a strong elimination team member only received a C overall rating.

Could it be...

Because it's too stupid?

After all, he has a label of "mentally challenged".

The issue is……

This broken system of yours, who's mentally challenged?!
Okay, you're the one!
Tang Yiping's gaze moved down another line:
Transfer cost: 1,500,000,000 survival points
Tang Yiping: "..."

One, ten, hundred, thousand, ten thousand... ten million, billion, billion!

To mobilize this guy, you need 1.5 billion survival points!!!
Uh, sorry to bother you.

I have offended you.

Tang Yiping felt that he might have overestimated himself, daring to mobilize such a high-level cleanup team. Then he saw a notification flash below:
—High-priority task detected. Should I enable exemption permissions? You can have three exemptions from any fees.

Emmmm…

Only three chances?

Hey, what are you hesitating for? Let's get started!
—Exemption permission enabled; exemption permission granted successfully.
—Transfer fees cleared to zero

—Guardians and enforcers of the "Survival Guide for the Weak"—Maintaining the stability of the "Survival Guide for the Weak" system is everyone's responsibility. Let's declare war on the parasites that damage the system!

Transfer fee: 0 points
Upon seeing the score of 0, Tang Yiping, fearing the system might change its mind, immediately mobilized the plump and juicy Universal Barbarian, Vanrag.

—Clearing team member Vanrag-G1178945623-C has been successfully transferred and is now physically descending to your current location.
—Warning, warning, warning! Your current location is too fragile to accommodate the physical arrival of the elimination team member, Vanrag-G1178945623-C. Please choose either cybernetic arrival or forceful suppression!
—Warning, warning, warning! The physical body of Vanrag is descending, ten, nine, eight…

As the countdown began, Tang Yiping felt the whole world tremble.

"Was it an earthquake?!" Tang Yiping heard Xu Songnian's scream from the opposite bedroom: "Pingzi, it's an earthquake! Run!"

Tang Yiping: ...

Allah, it was just that I almost destroyed the world again by accident.

In the critical moment, Tang Yiping chose to suppress his strength over the arrival of his prosthetic body.

—The opponent is currently overwhelmingly stronger; please wait.
Tang Yiping and others waited and waited.

Tang Yiping waited until midnight.

(End of this chapter)