Is not being able to do as you please also called rebirth?

Chapter 212 Yan Jin's Home
After returning from Yanqi Lake, the car was filled with an unprecedentedly sticky warmth.

Yan Jin stopped looking out the window and instead turned his head slightly, his gaze falling on Jiang Xun's slender fingers as he gripped the steering wheel. The golden glow of the setting sun outlined the focused profile of his face.

The frost that had always covered her cool and aloof eyes seemed to have been completely melted away by that clumsy yet passionate kiss in the heart of the lake, leaving only a faint, barely perceptible gentleness.

The car eventually drove into the underground parking lot of her upscale apartment near Kyoto University.

"We're here." Jiang Xun stopped the car and turned to look at her.

Under the dim underground parking lot lights, her pearl-white cashmere suit gleamed with a warm luster. She had shed the resolute armor she wore in front of Tang Yuzhe and also suppressed the intense emotions she displayed by the lake, revealing an almost fragile quietness.

"Hmm." Yan Jin responded softly, unbuckled her seatbelt, and resumed her usual composed movements.

She pushed open the car door, but her feet stopped in place. Instead of stepping out immediately, she turned slightly to look at Jiang Xun in the driver's seat.

In those clear, deep eyes, the aloofness had faded, replaced by a silent yearning that even she herself hadn't fully grasped.

Jiang Xun's heart skipped a beat. He turned off the engine, pulled out the key, and did so in one swift motion. "I'll take you upstairs." It wasn't a question, but a statement.

Yan Jin did not refuse, but simply hummed in agreement and walked towards the elevator first.

The elevator car was small and quiet, with only a slight hum as it ascended.

Jiang Xun stood beside her and could clearly smell the cool, crisp scent of cedar in her hair, mixed with the slight chill of winter moisture from Yanqi Lake.

As if by accident, he gently hooked his little finger around her fingers, which were hanging by her side and still felt cool.

The moment their fingertips touched, Yan Jin's body tensed almost imperceptibly, like a startled butterfly's wings.

However, the expected withdrawal did not occur. After that moment of stiffness, she merely curled her fingertips slightly, not breaking free, but instead, as if drawn by a magnet, letting his little finger wrap around her, carrying an undeniable warmth.

She kept her eyes fixed on the smooth, mirror-like surface of the elevator door, but a faint blush crept up her ears, like rouge spreading on rice paper.

The elevator doors opened, and she stepped out first, her steps seemingly composed, but the fingers that were hooked around her unconsciously tightened slightly.

The apartment is a typical example of minimalism, with a black, white, and gray color scheme, clean lines, and spotless appearance, just like her, exuding a cold and aloof aura.

Outside the huge floor-to-ceiling windows, the city lights twinkle in every corner, yet they offer little warmth. The living room feels empty and somewhat desolate, with only the cold leather sofa and the desk piled high with professional books and documents indicating the focus of the owner's life.

"Sit down." Yan Jin pointed to the sofa, but walked to the island in the open kitchen, turned her back to him, and started boiling water, seemingly trying to cover something up with her busyness.

She took off her cashmere coat and draped it over the back of the chair, revealing a close-fitting off-white turtleneck cashmere sweater underneath, which accentuated her slender yet shapely waist and back. Under the kitchen ceiling light, she looked like a warm and lustrous white jade statue.

Jiang Xun didn't sit down. He walked behind her and naturally peeked at the kettle.

"Are you hungry? You've been busy all day and haven't had a proper meal." His breath brushed against the back of her neck, carrying a familiar, refreshing, yet aggressive scent.

Yan Jin's body stiffened again, and she subconsciously turned slightly to avoid the scorching breath, trying her best to keep her voice calm:
"It's alright. There are ingredients in the refrigerator, so I can cook something simple." She opened the double-door refrigerator, which was indeed full of ingredients, but they were arranged as neatly as reagent bottles in a laboratory, lacking any homely atmosphere.

"Let me do it." Jiang Xun took the water glass from her hand without saying a word, his fingertips inevitably brushing against the back of her hand, bringing a slight electric current.

"Teacher Yan, you've worked hard today. Please try my cooking." He spoke in a relaxed tone, with an undeniable sense of consideration. His gaze swept over the dazzling array of ingredients in the refrigerator, and he already had a plan in mind.

He skillfully took out several kinds of vegetables, a piece of fine beef tenderloin, and a few eggs.

Yan Jin watched him bustle about in her rarely used kitchen, his movements fluid and powerful.

He rolled up the sleeves of his gray sweatshirt to his elbows, revealing his well-defined forearms. Washing vegetables, chopping meat, cracking eggs—the cutting board creaked rhythmically and pleasantly under his hands.

This was completely different from the cold, precise laboratory operations she remembered; it was full of vibrant life and strangely dispelled the long-standing chill of the apartment.

She forgot to look away, leaning against the island platform. Behind her gold-rimmed glasses, her eyes shimmered with the light of melting ice, carrying a focus and dependence that she herself was unaware of.

"Stir-fried beef with yellow peppers from Guizhou, plus a steamed egg custard, would that suit your taste?" Jiang Xun turned around and asked her, a smile playing on his lips, his eyes appearing particularly deep and gentle under the lamplight.

He remembered that she preferred milder flavors, but last time at the ski resort restaurant, she seemed to have taken a few extra bites of the slightly spicy beef.

"Mm." Yan Jin nodded gently, watching him skillfully smash garlic and slice ginger, then heat oil in a pan.

The sizzling sound of oil dancing merrily in the pan, along with the aroma of ingredients being added, instantly filled the air, domineeringly taking over the space that originally only smelled of disinfectant and paper.

This warmth of everyday life strangely relaxed her tense nerves, and a warm current quietly flowed into her heart.

Jiang Xun's movements as he wielded the wok were fluid and graceful; when he tossed the wok, his arm muscles bulged, exuding a powerful masculine energy.

Yan Jin's gaze involuntarily followed him, looking at his focused profile and the fine beads of sweat on his forehead.

When a plume of chili-scented oil smoke rose from the wok, she was caught off guard and choked a little, coughing lightly with her hand over her mouth.

Almost simultaneously, a glass of warm water was placed to her lips.

Jiang Xun had turned down the fire at some point and stood sideways in front of her, his eyes filled with concern.

"Are you alright? I forgot to remind you to stay away." He held a water glass in one hand, and naturally patted her back with the other, the warmth of his palm soothing her skin through the thin cashmere sweater. This intimate and comforting gesture made Yan Jin's body stiffen instantly, and a tingling sensation shot straight to her brain.

She instinctively wanted to back away, to push his hand away, and to say, "Don't worry about me."

However, her body betrayed her will. She merely turned her head slightly to avoid his burning gaze, took a small sip of the water he offered, and the warm liquid slid down her throat, slightly relieving her cough, but it couldn't extinguish the unfamiliar flutter in her heart.

She could even clearly feel his hand patting her back, with a soothing force, one pat after another, with a rhythm that made her feel intoxicated.

"Cough... all done." She said softly, her voice slightly hoarse, and finally raised her hand to gently press his wrist, which was resting on her back, to signal him to stop.

My fingertips touched his slightly warm skin, and I felt another slight shiver.

Jiang Xun readily withdrew his hand, but his fingertips seemed to still retain the delicate touch and slight coolness of her back.

He smiled and refocused on the food in the pan, as if the earlier incident was nothing out of the ordinary. Only his stirring movements seemed to become more energetic.

Soon, two dishes and a soup were served. The stir-fried beef with yellow peppers looked tempting and emitted a slightly spicy aroma, the tender egg custard was garnished with bright green scallions, and there was also a plate of stir-fried seasonal vegetables.

Simple home-cooked meals felt especially warm and cozy in this cold apartment.

The two sat facing each other. Yan Jin lowered her head and ate in small bites, her movements still elegant, only a little faster than usual.

Jiang Xun's cooking was even more to her liking than she had expected. The beef was tender and flavorful, with a perfectly balanced spiciness that tantalized her taste buds, and the steamed egg custard was so smooth it melted in her mouth. A long-lost feeling of warmth, a sense of "home," quietly enveloped her.

"So, Professor Yan, what's your opinion?" Jiang Xun looked at her, her eyes filled with expectant smiles, like a child waiting for praise.

Yan Jin raised her eyes, her gaze behind her gold-rimmed glasses calm, yet lacking some of her usual aloofness. "Hmm, very good." She paused, then, as if feeling it wasn't enough, added three more words, "...very delicious."

After speaking, she quickly lowered her head, as if this was the highest praise she could give, and the blush on the tips of her ears deepened.

Jiang Xun's smile deepened as he placed a piece of beef on her plate. "Eat more if you like it. You're so thin; the lab is so demanding, you need to keep up with your nutrition." His tone was filled with undisguised concern and a hint of possessiveness.

Yan Jin looked at the extra beef in her bowl, her fingers tightening slightly as she gripped her chopsticks. This natural act of care felt both unfamiliar and unsettling to her.

She didn't refuse; she simply put the piece of beef into her mouth and chewed it slowly. A hardened corner of her heart seemed to have been gently pried open by this subtle warmth.

After the meal, Jiang Xun took the initiative to clear the dishes. Yan Jin wanted to help, but Jiang Xun pressed him down on the sofa. "You're the hero today, sit down and rest for a while."

He moved swiftly, his tall figure busy in the kitchen, the sound of running water and the clinking of dishes forming a peaceful background.

Yan Jin leaned back on the sofa, her gaze involuntarily following that figure.

The neon lights of the city outside the window cast dappled shadows on him through the glass.

The tranquility and peace she felt at that moment were a luxury she had never experienced in the decades of her life.

She recalled the cold instruments in the laboratory, the oppressive atmosphere in Tang Yuzhe's office, and the desperate kiss by Yanqi Lake... All the coldness, struggle, and fear seemed to be dispelled by the warmth brought by the busy figure in the kitchen at this moment.

Just as she was slightly distracted, Jiang Xun dried his hands and walked over, sitting down naturally beside her.

The sofa sank slightly, and his presence instantly enveloped Yan Jin. Yan Jin's body tensed instinctively, and he shifted to the side, trying to create some distance.

Jiang Xun seemed oblivious to her dodge, naturally leaning his body and placing his arm on the back of the sofa behind her, almost encircling her in a half-embracing position.

He picked up the remote, turned on the TV which he had almost never used, randomly selected a financial channel, and turned the volume down very low.

"Want to watch the news for a bit?" he asked, turning his head to her side, his breath brushing against her ear.

The position was so intimate that Yan Jin felt as if she were completely enveloped by his breath and body temperature.

She wanted to push him away, to stand up, to maintain the dignity and distance befitting a professor.

However, a strange longing welled up deep within me—a longing for this warmth, a longing for this sense of security of being completely enveloped.

Her proud rationality screamed for danger, but her body honestly chose to succumb.

She only moved out a tiny, almost negligible amount, then stood stiffly, staring intently at the television screen, as if something there was something extremely captivating to her.

But the slightly pursed lips and the blush creeping up her neck betrayed the turmoil in her heart. Her hands, resting on her knees, unconsciously curled up.

Looking at her, who was clearly extremely nervous but was trying to appear calm, Jiang Xun felt an overwhelming tenderness and a wicked sense of satisfaction welling up inside him.

He made no further move, simply maintaining the half-embracing posture, his gaze fixed on the television screen, a pleased smile playing on his lips.

He could clearly feel the stiffness in her body, and beneath that stiffness, he could also sense the subtle, undisguised relaxation and dependence.

The financial news anchor analyzed market dynamics in a calm tone, leaving only the sound of the television and the two people's soft breathing in the apartment.

Time flowed slowly in a tacit understanding of ambiguity and tranquility.

(End of this chapter)