Super Hero Monk: Hormones Journey to the West

Chapter 234 Kui Mulang

Drinking is about seeking a state of intoxication, a self-destructive and unrestrained pleasure.

Therefore, the wine served at the celestial banquet must be able to fully stimulate the immortals' primordial spirit.

Soon, the large cup was filled with "Drunken Immortal Brew," its rich flavor as mellow as rising clouds; the small cup was filled with "Nine Yang Liquid," which resembled jade dew burning with a faint light.

A shrewd and experienced mountain god rose with a cup in hand and introduced the origin of "Nine Yang Elixir" to Master Chen:

"This wine comes from Zangwu Valley. It is a unique brew in Azhou, and it would be considered top-tier even in the Heavenly Palace. If we weren't so close to it, we poor immortals from remote and impoverished areas would never have the chance to taste it."

After saying this, he took the lead in using this wine, the kind that costs enough to scare monsters to death, to express his highest respect to Master Chen.

Then, dozens of local deities followed suit, raising their glasses one after another to Master Chen, a scene that once again echoed the words of the five-star general:
"...and his poop smells terrible too."

These cunning old foxes who hold sway over the area are, of course, well aware of who truly calls the shots here.

Beside Tang Xuanci sat the most respected local deity surnamed Zhang, and the mountain god of Wanzishan. One poured him wine, and the other lit his cigarette.

More than twenty enchantress maids of different cup sizes and races floated around, fanning up gentle breezes that mixed the scents of perfume on their skin, body odor from their pores, and odors from deep within their bodies, filling the entire space.

One after another, dishes brimming with spiritual energy and overflowing with nitrogen were served, including Steamed Dragon and Phoenix with Warm Cold Flower Wine, Cool Spirit Fox Tail Soup, Roasted Golden Carp Tail, Blood Jade Baby Stew... and Fairy Milk that exudes maternal radiance.

Tang Xuanci drank a few cups of Nine Yang Liquid, feeling that the wine bypassed his stomach and went straight into his consciousness. The "drunkenness" was somewhat similar to the state he experienced after eating the Earth Spirit Serpent Fruit at Shuangcha Ridge, but with an added sense of blissful euphoria.

Most of the local land gods and mountain gods were skilled in the art of language, and each of them spoke very pleasantly, which made the monkeys very happy. Soon, they plucked hairs and conjured dice cups, jumped onto chairs, and started shaking them with Chen Xiaoke and the others.

Zhu Ritian was eating and grabbing things, and if Sha Dingtian hadn't reminded him to be careful and not to be framed, he probably would have been arrested.

As cups of immortal wine were drunk, the atmosphere became increasingly lively.

The local scholar, well-versed in poetry, tried to compose a poem in front of the "Poet Immortal" (a legendary poet).

The mountain god, a master of music, closed the door and brandished his sword, then freestyled syle in front of the music saint.

Then he admitted that he was inferior to them all and recited Tang Xuanci's masterpiece in its entirety to worship it.

Even Tang Xuanci had to admit with a smile that when it came to flattery, they were only slightly inferior to Sha Dingtian.

Just as the atmosphere reached its peak, Kui Mulang, the Minister of the Fighting Department of Baoxiang Prefecture, entered, led by a local deity.

The laughter and chatter in the hall suddenly subsided, and apart from Tang Xuanci and his three disciples and Chen Xiaoke, all the immortals present quickly stood up.

Chen Xiaoke subconsciously wanted to get up, but seeing that Gege didn't move, she didn't move either.

This was the first time Tang Xuanci had ever met Kui Mulang.

It had a blue face and fangs, a purple beard around its jaw, and stood ten feet tall. It wore a pale golden robe, and with the respectful demeanor of the immortals, it appeared very imposing.

Tang Xuanci knew that the reason it had sent so many celestial officials here today was to show off its influence. It was as if it was telling him that no matter what, even if Chen Xiao was the top official in Azhou, it still called the shots in this celestial arena.

"Please be seated, everyone."

"Great Immortal Wuse, Holy Monk, Great Sage Sun, Marshal Tianpeng, and this Holy Monk's esteemed disciple, I was busy with official business today and arrived a little late. I am truly sorry."

"I'll punish myself with ten drinks as a way of apologizing!"

Kui Mulang walked to the table with a smile, and immediately a local deity lifted a chair and poured him ten cups of Nine Yang Liquid.

The woman in the black dress with a D-cup bust who came in with him took off his extraordinary yellow robe and gently hung it on the back of the chair.

Without any hesitation, Kui Mulang raised his glass of wine one after another, toasted Tang Xuanci's family of five, and then downed it in one gulp.

His temperament was somewhat unexpected, even a little gentle and refined.

"Good!" the local earth gods and mountain spirits cheered.

The monkey retorted sarcastically, "If you're craving alcohol, just drink it. Why bother with the self-punishment of ten cups?"

Kui Mulang laughed:
"Hahaha, Great Sage, you truly have discerning eyes! You saw right through my little scheme. Back in the battle at Heaven, you defeated me so badly I had to flee in terror. I have to admit defeat. Now that we meet at this banquet, I must have a good drink with you." The monkey had originally intended to bring up this incident to mock him, but he hadn't expected the fellow to expose his weakness first, which dampened the monkey's enthusiasm.

Tang Xuanci wanted to see what tricks Kui Mulang would play, and the food and wine were quite delicious. Sha Dingtian could also gather a lot of information during the meal, so he patiently gave his disciples a wink and continued to eat and drink with Kui Mulang.

The banquet finally came to an end around midnight.

Zhu Ritian, supported by two eighteen-year-old maids, went to the toilet.

The monkey and Chen Xiaoke were lured into the courtyard by the local earth gods under the pretext of offering treasures.

Only Kui Mulang, Tang Xuanci, Sha Wujing, and the alluring woman in the black dress remained at the main table.

At this moment, Kui Mulang smoothly got to the point, making the black fox spirit who called herself "Lady of Wanzishan Boyue Cave" reveal their true purpose.

It turns out that what they were after was the origin of Jiuyang Liquid – “Zangwu Valley”.

It is located between the two major spiritual veins of Wanzishan and Pingdingshan, and currently belongs to the celestial property of the Heavenly Court.

Deep within its heart lies a very special spring, which was transformed from the golden crow nurtured by the true fire of the sun when heaven and earth were first separated.

At that time, there were ten golden crows hanging in the sky. Hou Yi shot down nine of them, which fell to various places in the four continents and transformed into nine springs on the ground, which were called the Nine Yang Springs.

One of them is located in the Zangwu Valley.

Although this spring water was rare in the past, its most known use, apart from assisting in the cultivation of some special techniques, was simply to make "Nine Yang Liquid".

However, a secret of the Taoist sect has recently been circulating in Dongsheng Shenzhou—

By incorporating the Nine Yang Spring into a large spiritual vein and arranging it using feng shui secrets, an extremely rare herbaceous spiritual seed called "Returning Golden Fungus" can be cultivated.

This Golden Ganoderma is an essential raw material for the Tushita Palace to refine the "Great Rejuvenation Elixir," and it is used in large quantities with extremely high purchase prices.

Therefore, both Pingdingshan Group and Wanzishan Group are vying for Zangwu Valley, hoping to incorporate it into the spiritual veins of their own mountain ranges.

Of course, neither this secret nor the secret method has been made public yet. Kui Mulang didn't explain it too clearly to Tang Xuanci either, but he generously acknowledged its extremely high value.

The Heavenly Court had already approved the development plan for this land in principle, but the specifics of how to coordinate, how to operate, and who to grant the land to were largely decided by the City God of Azhou.

After the black fox spirit finished recounting the development plan for Wave Moon Cave, her lips brimming with the aroma of wine, Kui Mulang took over the conversation and said to Tang Xuanci:
"Brother Tang, there are no outsiders here, so I'll speak frankly."

"Now everyone knows that the City God of Azhou is completely devoted to you."
"If you can get her to agree to this plan, you will definitely benefit a lot. You can also bring up any ideas you have to discuss."

"To be honest, even though many Taoist forces have emerged in Baoxiang Kingdom, it is still ultimately under the Zhang family name."

"You did have some conflicts with the Zhang family at Huashan Immortal Abode, but injuries are inevitable in the competition on the arena."

"I, Kui Mulang, guarantee that if Brother Tang is willing to befriend me, the Zhang family will never mention this grudge again. You can then focus on making great strides in Azhou, and all the celestial beings under your command will fully support you."

Tang Xuanci understood.

To be honest, when he was rejected at Taihua Mountain, he thought that Kui Mulang was very pretentious and really wanted to kill it.

But today, meeting him face to face, he found the man's words quite pleasant to listen to, and the steps taken to make him feel more comfortable were well taken.

So he actually started to consider the deal.

After all, it would be quite good to join forces with them and first take down those sour radishes and bitches from the Daoist sect who were trying to intercept and kill us.

Of course, a decision can only be made after a thorough understanding of the land and a careful weighing of the pros and cons.

What if the value of Zangwu Valley is far greater than imagined, and the underground is full of high-abundance uranium ore?

So he sent a "Peace Under Heaven" message to Kui Mulang, saying that cultivating immortality should prioritize harmony, and that he would give it serious consideration.

(End of this chapter)