Damn it, I'm in the garbage book I wrote

Chapter 729 The Vulgar Will Always Be Vulgar

Putting everything else aside, the phrase "romantic love" alone is enough to make most rulers shudder.

Previously, it was only briefly mentioned, but now we will formally introduce its origin and development.

The "Wind, Flower, Snow, and Moon" organization originated from the war between Wu and Yue during the Spring and Autumn Period. It was an organization established by Fan Li. Initially, it was not called "Wind, Flower, Snow, and Moon" but was an institution responsible for training spies and assassins.

Most of the world's most famous assassins and killers come from this organization. They are disciples of the Mohist school, skilled in mechanical arts and cryptography. Later, during the Three Kingdoms period, Cao Wei used the perilous path they provided to conquer Shu.

Despite Zhuge Liang's exceptional abilities, the seemingly impregnable Shu Kingdom ultimately succumbed to a seemingly insignificant intelligence attack. For the next three hundred years, they were scattered across various regions, profiting from the chaos of the War of the Eight Princes by serving various factions.

Until the Northern Wei Dynasty unified the country, they concealed themselves and began to become the largest intelligence agency in the north.

People say they are dogs kept by aristocratic families in the north, but that's not true. A more accurate description would be that they are actually dogs kept by various families.

However, this mysterious organization is always elusive, with almost no one knowing who their boss is or how the organization operates.

Li Shimin knew this person because he had collaborated with Feng Hua Xue Yue many times, and his status was high enough to see her true face. Even so, he never dared to underestimate her and was always very polite to her whenever they met.

However, when I saw her again now, she appeared in this manner. The kneeling bow was probably not for the emperor, but for someone close to him.

"She's so beautiful." Emperor Jingtai pointed at the super spy: "Is she married?"

"Your Majesty, I am a woman who indulges in romance and pleasure but does not marry, and has no children; I only take on disciples."

After listening, Emperor Jingtai stroked his chin and pondered for a long time, but Li Shimin finally couldn't help but ask, "Why are you here?"

"Your Highness, the kingdom will perish if it does not come to enjoy the beauty of nature."

Erfeng suddenly turned to look at Xia Lin: "You did this? You almost destroyed the Wind, Flower, Snow and Moon Palace?"

Xia Lin chuckled, propping his neck up with his hand, "This is my first time meeting her too. Are you settling in well here? What's your name again?"

Erfeng was shocked. He thought Xia Lin had fought a tough battle with Feng Huaxueyue, and that both sides had paid a heavy price before finally winning. But now, judging from his tone, it seemed that he didn't take them seriously at all, and didn't even know the name of their leader.

“Replying to Lord Xia, my name is Caique. You may call me Que Nu.”

Emperor Jingtai scratched his face, looking at Li Shimin with some surprise: "What's wrong? Is this 'romantic musing' really that impressive?"

"You do not know?"

"I don't know," Emperor Jingtai spread his hands. "Nobody has told me. He's always been the one handling things around me; I haven't had any contact with him."

Li Shimin was stunned when he heard this. He found it quite amusing that the emperor of a country didn't even understand romance and poetry... It was truly remarkable that he was able to sit on the throne so peacefully.

But then he thought about it again and saw Xia Daosheng beside him, and he didn't get angry anymore. Yeah, with Xia Daosheng around, what's the point of all this romance? Look, he's even dragged the boss here.

“Your Majesty, the 'Wind, Flowers, Snow, and Moon' is not that powerful, otherwise we wouldn’t have almost been wiped out by Lord Xia.” Cai Que smiled and said, “However, I am grateful to Lord Xia for sparing my life and allowing me to stay here to run my business.”

“It’s not that you’re not capable, it’s that he’s too capable.” Li Shimin waved his hand and said, “You said it would have been closer for you to go from Luoyang to Chang’an back then.”

“After this, even if you stab him to death, he'll have nowhere to seek justice.” Emperor Jingtai waved his hand and said, “You are not as gentle as I am.”

They were arguing about why Xia Lin went to Jinling instead of Chang'an, while Cai Que sat there watching them make a fuss with a smile.

In the end, they didn't reach any conclusion in their argument. At this moment, Xia Lin raised her finger to Cai Que's chin and said, "Oh, you are really beautiful."

"Thank you for the compliment, Lord Xia."

"Don't be so polite." Xia Lin sat down opposite her. "I'm here today to do some business with you. How much intelligence do you have about Northern Han?"

"There are some, does Your Excellency want them?"

Xia Lin pointed at Li Shimin: "It's His Highness the Prince of Shu who wants it. You connect with him, and he'll pay you. Name your price."

"According to the rules of romance and poetry, the prices are three thousand taels, five thousand taels, and ten thousand taels. I have three messages worth ten thousand taels, two messages worth five thousand taels, and seven messages worth three thousand taels. I wonder how much you and His Highness the Prince of Shu would like?"

"Is it worth ten thousand taels?" Erfeng squinted her eyes: "It's not cheap."

"Your Highness, this is the rule. You must be aware of it."

"And what about him?" Li Shimin pointed at Xia Lin: "How much would he want?"

"Ten taels, five taels, and three taels." "Are you bullying me?!" Li Shimin slammed his fist on the table and stood up: "Why are they so much more expensive here?"

Caique lowered her head and smiled: "Your Highness, this is the rule."

Li Shimin sat there, both amused and annoyed. He took a deep breath and said, "If these things are really worth the money, I'll just pay for them. Let's see what you're capable of when it comes to romance and poetry."

"Alright, Your Highness, please wait a moment."

After bowing, Caique left the room. At this moment, Emperor Jingtai asked curiously, "Daosheng, this woman must be quite something. Have you tried her?"

"No, this is my first time seeing one too." Xia Lin waved his hand: "Don't start making lewd comments just because you see a woman."

“Exactly.” Erfeng was quite unsettled at the moment: “He doesn’t look like an emperor at all.”

"Hey, you two make it sound so easy. Let me ask you, is it really possible for anyone to see a woman like that without having impure thoughts? Are you two impotent?"

"It's not that it's impossible, it's just that we're not very familiar with each other." Xia Lin started making tea. "Besides, we have to consider our image. We're respectable people, after all. We can't be like lecherous ghosts day and night."

"Exactly, you're so capable and shameless, why don't you go and ask that colorful sparrow if she can keep you company tonight?" Erfeng rolled her eyes and said, "You're acting like an emperor, how despicable."

"Romantic! Is this what you call romantic?" Emperor Jingtai said angrily, "A gentleman is attracted to beauty but not to lewdness, do you understand?"

"You? You're so lecherous you're practically twisted, and you're still not lewd. I'm not saying this to be rude, but if you weren't wearing that dragon robe to restrain you, you would have been dead in a woman's belly years ago."

Xia Lin was quite curious at this moment: "Let's play a dirty game later, roll the dice three times, and then have her play with the person whose total score is the highest all night. What do you think?"

"Right! You also think this woman is a feast for the eyes, right? How could there be such a person in the world..." Emperor Jingtai raised his head and listened carefully to the commotion outside. After finding that no one was coming, he bent down and lowered his voice, saying, "How could someone be so alluring? Among all my concubines, not one can compare to her. Even Jinlian is far inferior."

Li Shimin pursed his lips and remained silent, but judging from his rapid blinking, he probably thought so too.

"It's actually quite simple. Fair skin, delicate temperament, big breasts, round buttocks, a bit chubby but a slim waist—who wouldn't like someone like that?" Xia Lin tapped the table. "But whether we say it or not, we still have to consider our reputation. We all have families."

“If you don’t know, it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.” Emperor Jingtai held up one finger and said, “Confucius said, ‘To know what you know, and to know what you don’t know, that is true knowledge.’ It means that if you know something, you know it, and there’s nothing you can do about it. If you don’t know something, then try your best not to let people know. That’s the wisest approach.”

"Tuoba Jing, you've wasted your time studying the classics!" Erfeng slammed her hand on the table. "Besides, expecting the two of you to keep this a secret is as difficult as climbing to heaven."

"Let's do it together! Keeping a shared secret is the easiest thing to do."

Xia Lin stared at the two emperors in surprise: "Um... you two, although it is human nature to eat and have sex, this is a bit too vulgar, it's a bit dirty, I can't accept it."

"Hey!" Emperor Jingtai held up a finger: "How about I write back to Jinling now and bring over a young concubine, then we can take turns being on the bell and see who lasts the longest?"

As soon as Emperor Jingtai uttered his words, Xia Lin and Erfeng were stunned. After pondering for a long time, Erfeng nodded slightly: "It is said that emperors will develop some problems after being in power for a long time, and it seems that this is indeed the case. I dare not listen to what you have to say; it would offend my ears."

“It is indeed a bit dirty.” Xia Lin took a sip of tea. “I can’t accept it.”

"This won't work, that won't work, what are you guys doing out here? Are you really just looking at the scenery? Stop pretending."

At this moment, Erfeng's momentum weakened by three points. He coughed and said, "That's not how it works, Brother Jing. It's fine to play around, but how about doing it in a more refined way? Your way of playing is a bit too filthy."

"What have you been doing all this time? Eating and drinking, bird watching and music. Can't I do these things in the palace? Besides, which one of you is lacking in women? But have you ever done anything so dirty? No! Why not try something new in this world?"

Xia Lin stood up and said, "I'm going to pee."

"Trying to pee on the spot, huh! Don't you dare leave. If you need to pee, use that potty!"

But he couldn't stop Xia Lin from running out. Xia Lin didn't go to urinate, but instead sat in another private room looking at the scenery of West Lake.

It wasn't that he was pretending to be a saint, but he simply couldn't accept such dirty practices. At that moment, he suddenly felt like smoking. Although he wasn't addicted to nicotine, he just thought that having a cigarette would be such a good thing right now.

So he took out his phone and searched for "how to hand-smoke cigarettes in ancient times".

He studied and took notes, and time passed quickly. After some time, the small door was opened, and Caique walked in and closed the door behind her: "Lord Xia, the things have been given to His Highness the Prince of Shu."

"Okay, did he pay?"

"Already given."

"Well, it's perfect that you're here to help me get the things on this list."

(End of this chapter)