[Football] Bad Boy Batty

At the end of July, Manchester City ushered in its first overseas commercial activity after the epidemic. They will travel to the United States for pre-season training and warm-up matches in cities such as Houston, Miami, and Los Angeles.

Currently, the United States has strict entry rules for the epidemic, but fortunately Batistuta had received all the vaccines at the beginning of the year, otherwise he might be banned from entering the country. Like Foden, Gundogan, and Stones, they did not meet the requirements and could only stay in Manchester to conduct pre-season training with other echelon players.

At 10 am, the players arrived at the airport to board their planes.

Since Batistuta had been undergoing recovery training before, Haaland and other new players only showed up in their first training session to show their captaincy, so it was not until now that they truly met for the first time.

Hugging and shaking hands along the way, the Manchester City captain came to Haaland who was standing at the end of the team. The impact of looking at him from a group of people was far less strong than when they were face to face now.

The moment Batty faced him, the image of a 'Nordic giant' immediately came to his mind.

"Hey!" Manchester City captain stretched out his hand. "I was in a hurry to meet you last time and didn't have time to welcome you. Now I'm glad you chose Manchester City. Erling, we will show you what real football is."

Wow, real football.

Just as people described on the Internet, Haaland thought, the King of Manchester City was even more arrogant than he had imagined.

"Thank you." He lowered his head to meet Batty's eyes, shook his hand, and then gave him a friendly smile. "I'm looking forward to it."

What he didn't know was that in Batty's eyes, his 'friendly smile' was like a shark showing its sharp teeth, which inexplicably gave people a feeling of contempt and disdain.

and--

hiss!
It was really painful. Batty suppressed the gasp in his throat, pulled back his hand and shook it quietly. It was still so painful to shake hands with this guy.

"One more thing, Erling," the little king, whose hand was pinched and hurt, rolled his eyes and came up with a good idea for a prank. He drew out his tone, "Since you have chosen Manchester City, you must abide by our special rules."

Seeing Batistuta's appearance and the sound of his voice, almost all Manchester City players and staff realized that he was going to do something bad.

De Bruyne smiled and then covered his mouth with his hands and coughed a few times: "Yes, that's right."

Most people cooperated and acted very seriously.

Haaland nodded seriously.

"What rules?" he asked.

"Very good." Batty raised his chin. "The rule is - starting from tomorrow afternoon when we go to Houston to prepare for the new season training, whenever you see me you must bow and salute and call me Your Majesty the King."

There was a blank look on Haaland's face for one second.

"...Really?" He looked at everyone, sniffed, and asked doubtfully, "You all, um, all call the captain that?"

"Of course." Batty stretched out his hand and snapped his fingers twice in front of his eyes. "Look here, big man, you have to respect the king when he speaks to you."

The people at the back could hardly hold back any longer and gathered together with their heads down, laughing quietly. Haaland noticed them and his suspicions about this 'rule' were confirmed.

So far, no one has been able to successfully make fun of him, whether he was in the youth training, or later in Salzburg Red Bull and Dortmund. Even as a newcomer, he was not the target of "bullying".

How interesting, little king, he thought.

"Okay," Haaland said, shrugging. "So, what about training?"

Batty: "What do you mean by what to do during training?"

"Like sometimes in group play, we were in different groups and you wanted to stop me but you fell down yourself," Haaland said.

Batty narrowed his eyes dangerously.

"This situation is possible, right? Just like those animated pictures in the group." The Norwegian was not afraid of the little king's warning at all, as if he was really analyzing the problem seriously. "What should I do? I will help you up. Your Majesty, do you want me to do this?"

When Haaland asked the last question, Batistuta's smirk could no longer be maintained, and everyone around him burst into loud laughter.

"Hahahaha, I like this guy, he's very much my cup of teasing!" Walker patted B's shoulder vigorously and said, "Would you like to join our 'Tease Batty' club, Erling? I see your talent."

"Thank you." Haaland was still so polite. "I do have talent. This invitation means a lot. I will consider it."

Batty rolled his eyes.

"Fuck off Kyle, you always want to lead the newcomers astray." The Manchester City captain waved his hand at Walker like he was shooing away a fly.

"Leading him astray?" Walker spread his hands innocently. "You heard what he just said. That's not what I taught him. Batty dear, Erling doesn't need anyone to teach him."

"Call me captain, you bastard." Batty gave him the middle finger, then turned around and patted the newcomer on the shoulder, "Don't listen to him, he's just a second-rate guy, even a prankster, wait a while and you will understand who owns the locker room."

Haaland's shoulders were broader than the last time they met, and Batistuta took the opportunity to pinch his arm muscles, then pretended to bump into him during a match.

The Norwegian just watched his captain do all this, and he didn't move at all in the face of the impact.

Haaland was puzzled: "This is——"

"Nothing." Batty clapped his hands and stretched his numb shoulders. "Just testing whether you can still hold your own against defenders like before."

Haaland nodded: "What is the result?"

"Impressive." Batty raised his head and raised his eyebrows at him. "Honestly, Erling, how do you usually train? In addition to your natural physical fitness, how can you stay stable in the confrontation? Tell me, I need this."

In the little king's expectant eyes, Harland said quietly -

“Work hard.”

Batty: ?
That's it? That's it?

"——And?" Batty asked, "What else?"

Haaland thought for a moment: "Hard work."

"puff--"
"Look! Look at Barty's expression!"
“Hahahahahaha!” Batty: …

Amid the merciless mockery of his teammates, the young king lowered his head and covered his face.

The Norwegian must have done it on purpose, he thought. Well done Erling Haaland, he'll remember you.

……

After arriving in Houston, Manchester City players began a week-long pre-season training step by step. Although it was called training, this kind of commercial activity was mainly based on interacting with fans, open training, interviews, and some other small games.

The first warm-up match was scheduled at the Lambeau Stadium in Green Bay, Wisconsin. Manchester City's opponent was Bayern. In the three days before the game, the entire team only had one afternoon for training.

After all, it's just a warm-up match, so there's no need to take it as seriously as the final.

The main purpose is to allow new players to make their debut and to allow players returning from injuries to get a feel for returning to the court and cooperating with the team.

Therefore, Guardiola arranged almost everyone to assist Batistuta before the game, asking them to pass the ball to him more, give him enough space to operate, and give him as much encouragement as possible.

Three months is not a short time. For the goal of the new season, he must do everything he can to get his captain back to his previous state. Of course, this will also help prepare for the World Cup at the end of the year.

Unfortunately, there was a thunderstorm on the day of the game. Considering the safety of the players, the time was shortened to 80 minutes, and the number of substitutions was not restricted.

Bayern started with the substitute goalkeeper, Neuer sat on the bench, so the captain's armband was handed to Thomas Muller.

"Hi Batistuta, long time no see. You still look so energetic!" Muller greeted enthusiastically in his Bavarian-flavored English.

After all these years, his talkative nature has not changed. It's like a dam. It's fine at first, but once you mention a topic that interests him, he will talk nonstop, like a dam bursting.

Unfortunately, Batistuta made such a mistake. He mentioned that he had seen Muller post a video of feeding rabbits on social media before, and since this was a warm-up match, there were not so many rules and regulations, so Thomas Muller dragged him to talk about rabbits until half a minute before the game started.

"Those little guys are so cute. I love feeding them carrots. You should come and see them when you have time. They will hold the food and eat it. If you approach them from behind, they will run away but will never let go of the carrot in their hands!" Mueller's eyes lit up when he said this.

Batty thought that maybe he could consider becoming a farmer after retirement.

"Yeah——" The little king was really impatient and decided to end the topic of rabbits in a cruel way.

So he interrupted Mueller when he was talking about how furry and powerful rabbit legs were and said, "You're absolutely right, rabbit legs are my favorite food, but nutritionists don't recommend them because they don't have much energy, but hey, they're really nice to chew, aren't they?"

Mueller: !!!
Mr. Chatterbox finally shut up and looked at Batty with a very horrified look, as if he was a bad guy who had committed a heinous crime.

The purpose was achieved.

The Manchester City king showed his signature flamboyant smile: "I know there is a roasted rabbit restaurant in Los Angeles that does very well. If there is a chance in the future, I would like to invite you to try it. You are welcome."

After saying that, Batty patted the stunned Muller on the shoulder, turned around and led the team into the venue.

……

Batistuta played the entire match. Guardiola made substitutions in all other positions, including several young players from the echelon. In the end, Manchester City won the warm-up match 2-0 against Bayern Munich with goals from Batistuta and Haaland.

For his first game after his return, the little king's performance was average. Apart from the fact that he received the pass from De Bruyne with surprising ease, there was nothing else that stood out.

But there is one thing that Batty himself cares about.

That was around the 53rd minute in the second half. Manchester City had the ball in the midfield and they moved forward as a whole. With Haaland, the real center forward, Batistuta retreated to the midfield.

New signing Phillips raised his hand to signal a pass, and Batistuta anticipated the ball, but because the force was a little weak, he did not judge the landing point very accurately. At that time, Bayern midfielder Goretzka happened to be near him, so the two competed for the ball.

So far, everything is normal.

What was wrong was that in the next second, Batistuta was holding off Goretzka with his back. He wanted to hook the ball with his right foot and dribble past the opponent from behind. He was so familiar with the technique that it was almost engraved in his genes. But just as he sent the ball out and prepared to turn around, the abnormality of his right foot made him slow down by half a beat.

This has never happened before.

Closer and closer - his consciousness was in place, but his body hadn't caught up. Thinking of this, Batty felt that his chest was squeezed to the point of lack of oxygen, and his heart was also grasped by something.

Fortunately, Goretzka didn't keep up, and he saved the ball himself after Batistuta's kick was off target, so the ball was not lost. Many fans and even commentators thought it was an unintentional mistake, so this little episode was basically ignored.

After the game, Batistuta exchanged jerseys with the young Bayern player named Musiala, and then took a photo together. After returning to the hotel, he went to the team doctors to check his right foot, but the doctors couldn't find anything.

"Are you sure?" the little king asked doubtfully, "Then what about the strange feeling I just felt on the court?"

"From a medical point of view, you have indeed recovered." Alandes took off his gloves and said, "Don't worry, Batistuta, it's normal for a player like you who has just returned to the court to have distrust of his injury."

"So... am I really okay?"

"Really." The scientific officer said confidently, "You are completely healed physically, but when your brain receives stimulation feedback, it will subconsciously think that something is wrong. This is a very common psychological effect, and the duration of its existence varies from person to person. You still need to continue to adapt."

Batty nodded, his eyes moving from his right foot to the ground.

At this time there was a knock on the door.

Grealish pushed the door open a little and half of his face was exposed: "Hey Batty! There's an ice cream truck outside. We need to go get some supplies. Are you coming?"

Diverting attention is also a good way, and it’s ice cream. Batty gave a thumbs up to the England striker outside the goal to signal him to wait, then jumped out of bed and put on his socks.

"Let's go! I want the biggest portion!"

(End of this chapter)