[Football] Bad Boy Batty

The interval between each group match in the World Cup is not long. Three days later, the Samba Army will face Costa Rica in the second round.

Before the game, the team media said that Brazil's two trump cards were in poor physical condition. Batistuta missed the training on the 19th, and Neymar missed the training on the 20th.

Then Brazil coach Tite publicly stated at the press conference that the two players were in good health and that their absence from training was due to other reasons that were not convenient to disclose. The fans were relieved.

Soon, Alves posted a confusing photo. In the photo, Neymar had a sad face and was trying his best to cover his shorts with his hands, while Batistuta looked gloating next to him.

Just when people were imagining whether Neymar and Batistuta's absence from training had injured any private parts, France beat Peru 2-0, and Augusto's background, who came on as a substitute, completely attracted people's attention.

Well, not completely.

Netizens lamented that even the richest financial family in the world could not resist the charm of football, and desperately dug up gossip, so Batistuta returned to the public eye, and the stories of 'love at first sight' and 'the heir to a wealthy family bravely pursuing love' were brought up again.

Hot on Twitter:
Augustus wanted to be Batti's Romeo, but Batti didn't want to be Augustus' Juliet, so it was destined to be a tragedy.

Of course, news heat during the World Cup comes and goes quickly, and there are always more explosive news ahead. On the afternoon of June 6st, Russian time, Argentina lost 21-0 to Croatia. After two consecutive group matches, their qualification situation was precarious, which surprised everyone.

As the star player, Messi naturally became the target of media criticism.

Batistuta sent a comforting private message to the other party, but it fell on deaf ears. Aguero told him on the phone that Messi was in a bad mood and it might get worse if he talked to him (the Brazilian).

This is indeed the case. Argentina and Brazil, the old enemies in South America, have been competing since the last century. A few years ago, many Argentine media mocked Brazil for its talent loss and said it would not get the sixth star even after another 20 years. Now that Argentina has suffered a black start in the World Cup, the Brazilian media are delighted and are madly mocking Argentina for not being able to get five stars even after another 100 years.

Meanwhile, to take the taunting a step further, Brazilian fans put up signs everywhere that read:
[Neymar + Batistuta = Sixth World Cup Championship]
[Aguero + Messi = lose in the group stage and go home]

……

"It's incredible that Argentina lost to Croatia by three goals." Batistuta said as he put on his socks in the locker room before the game. "I thought about meeting them in the semi-finals or finals, but I never thought it would be like this. Argentina will have to worry about qualifying from the group stage soon."

"Their performance in the World Cup qualifiers was very bad, and I am not surprised that it turned out like this today." Marcelo took over and said, "It depends on the result of tonight's game. If Nigeria can beat Iceland, they still have a chance."

Batistuta shrugged. In his opinion, Argentina had already gone home early.

At this time, Thiago Silva, who was appointed as the captain of this game, clapped his hands and came over: "We have to be nervous. Costa Rica is not a weak team. The whole world saw their performance in 2014."

Marcelo nodded seriously and sat back in his seat. Only Batistuta still acted indifferent.

"They are no longer the Costa Rica team of four years ago. Just watch the video of their first game and you'll know. There's nothing to be afraid of." The boy put on all his equipment, stood up and jumped two steps. Then he took out a small mirror from his bag and looked at his neck. Neymar's signature there didn't seem to be very obvious.

"Don't worry, luminous things are only noticeable in the dark." Firmino came over with his teeth so white that they glowed and patted Batistuta on the shoulder. "Besides, I think Neymar is the one who should be more worried."

After his reminder, many people remembered the scene when Neymar attended the meeting the night before, and a burst of good-natured laughter broke out in the locker room.

Batty was laughing when he suddenly realized something was wrong. He looked around and said, "Wait, where is our light ball? Where did it go?"

"In the shower room." Alves pointed over there. "He rushed in right after getting off the bus. It seemed like he had a little secret that he didn't want to be discovered."

"Little secret?" Batty sneered. "His penis is glowing, what else can he hide?"

After saying that, the boy walked towards the shower room.

"Are you here, Ney?" He pressed the doorknob. "There's nothing to worry about. The luminous paint is only noticeable in the dark. It's noon now and the sun is pretty good in St. Petersburg. No one will notice."

However, the door was locked and could not be opened from the outside.

"What are you doing? We are about to start the game. Come out." Batty pressed the door handle several times. "You are not hiding in there crying, are you? Come on. A glowing ** is what men all over the world dream of."

Just as Batistuta finished his last word, the door opened and Neymar's face full of resentment appeared in front of Batistuta.

"Dream come true?" Neymar stared at him and asked, "Then why don't you have one?"

Batty pursed his lips to hold back his smile: "If you like, of course I have no problem, but the pen is out of ink, even if I want to, I can't do it."

Neymar snorted a few times, poked Batistuta in the chest several times with an expression that said, "I've seen through you a long time ago," and then he stopped. He lowered his head and pulled up his pants uncomfortably.

"It's okay, no one will see." Batistuta put his hand on his shoulder and gave him a quick kiss on the corner of his mouth, then leaned close to his ear and said jokingly, "I'm sorry, but my dear Neymar, your size is not big enough to attract attention."

Neymar: ???

The Paris star, who was already angry, became even angrier after being provoked by Batistuta.

"8.4 inches is not small!" he retorted through gritted teeth.

"Really?" Batty drawled, "But I don't feel 8.4, 7.4 is about the same."

what! !

Neymar instantly turned into boiling water.

"You little bastard!" He grabbed Barty by the collar, "Do you have to do it at this time? I——"

Before he could finish his words, Batty blinked and rubbed his head with his hand: "Did you forget to water your noodles? They are compressed noodles now. I prefer the previous ones, which are elastic."

Neymar: …

He had to punch this little bastard in the face today!
……

Compared with the last game, the Brazilian team rotated two players today. Alves did not make the starting lineup due to leg muscle discomfort, and the front position was replaced by Firmino instead of Jesus, while other positions remained unchanged.

Costa Rica used a three-center-back formation, as if they were determined to fight with the Brazilian team. In the first round, Costa Rica lost 3-0 to Serbia. If they lose this game again, they will bid farewell to the World Cup early.

The goalkeeper is Navas; the defense is Acosta, Giancarlo Gonzalez, and Duarte; in the midfield, Borges partners with Guzman, Oviedo and Gamboa are on the left and right respectively; on the front line, Ruiz is on the right, Venegas is on the left, and Urena is at the front.

Until the start of the game, the atmosphere in the Brazilian team was very relaxed. Neymar and Batistuta even had time to rehearse a new goal celebration dance. The Costa Rican side was quite serious. Of course, as one of the most powerful teams in this World Cup, the Brazilian team had reason to relax.

However, the pre-match joy did not last long, thanks to the Costa Rican goalkeeper.

Brazil played very aggressively after the opening and successfully advanced into the penalty area within a few minutes, causing panic in front of Costa Rica's goal.

But none of the shots from Firmino, Neymar or Batistuta turned into goals. Costa Rican goalkeeper Navas played superbly today.

In the 14th minute, Costa Rica made a mistake in the backcourt and Ruiz passed the ball directly to Batistuta. Batistuta turned around and adjusted quickly, raising his foot to shoot before the defender blocked it. It was a high-quality shot with the potential to score a goal, but it was unfortunately blocked by Navas with one hand.

Batty stomped the grass twice and punched to vent his anger.

"Well done!" Neymar gave Batistuta a thumbs up, "Keep it up!"

Batty clapped in response.

However, it was Costa Rica that really stepped up.

After Brazil's momentum at the start faded, Costa Rica gradually began to find some ways to attack. Venegas got the ball on the right, and Marcelo chased back to defend, but he was too far ahead in the attack and didn't have time to get into position.

Gamboa assisted and played a wall pass with Venegas, then passed Casemiro who was returning to defend and made a cross from the bottom line. Fortunately, Thiago Silva stood in front of the goal and made a thrilling clearance.

"Cheer up! Don't be anxious! Watch your back and don't let your opponent take the lead!" Tite clapped his hands on the sidelines to encourage the players, "Split up and go to the front! Batistuta! Get outside!"

Without Alves' assist ability, Batistuta had a difficult time. Costa Rica put up a dense defense and it was difficult to create space in the middle. Going to the outside might create more opportunities.

Batistuta nodded and gestured his agreement to the head coach.

Although they were unable to open up the situation, it was still much better than Switzerland who used fouls against them in the previous game.

……

In the 26th minute, Brazil won a free kick in the frontcourt. Neymar and Batistuta exchanged glances, and then walked towards the penalty spot and the goal in tacit understanding.

"Over here! Over here!" The Costa Rican defensive general nervously called out to his teammates to get into position. Guzman and Batistuta huddled together to prevent him from jumping for the header.

With the referee's penalty whistle, Neymar's free kick was kicked to the front point. Thiago Silva headed the ball over his opponent. At the back point, Batistuta made a fake shot and rushed out in front of Guzman. After breaking away from the defense, he stopped the ball with the outside of his foot and adjusted for a low shot!
Navas stepped up again. The Real Madrid goalkeeper made a flying save and changed the ball's path, and the ball hit the post and rolled out of the bottom line.

"Damn it!" Batty couldn't help but curse under his breath.

He looked up at the sky and took a deep breath.

Just a little bit closer!
"This ball is very close!" Neymar pulled him over and hugged him, then patted Batistuta's neck to comfort him while they separated. "Don't worry, we have the advantage, hold on."

"I know." Batistuta shook his hair. "Even if we don't score any goals in this match, we can still qualify as the top team if we keep the score at 0-0, but..."

"Don't think too much." Neymar interrupted his complaints, "Listen to the master and follow the tactical arrangement."

Batty looked at him for a few seconds and nodded.

"understood."

Seeing Navas serving the ball, Neymar gave him a thumbs up and ran back to the left. Batistuta licked his lips and got back into the game.

……

In the 39th minute, Marcelo launched an attack from the backcourt. Neymar moved to the side and cooperated with Coutinho before making a cross. Firmino's half-volley hit the crossbar and bounced out of bounds.

In the injury time of the first half, the Brazilian midfielder intercepted the ball and launched a quick attack. Batistuta did not wait for the defensive player to break through and directly made a long pass into the penalty area. Neymar cleverly stopped the ball and had a one-on-one opportunity, but Navas blocked it in time and the ball was shoveled out of the baseline.

This time it was Neymar's turn to be upset.

Just a little more!
The Paris star lay on the ground, releasing the force and pounded the grass hard.

If only he had been one step faster, no, half a step faster!

Just half a step faster and they can...

"Navas was really amazing today." Batistuta's voice pulled Neymar back to the field. He propped up his upper body on the grass and bumped into the smile on the boy's mouth. "Why are you sighing? Come, I'll pull you up, go back and review the game, and wait for the second half to shoot through him!"

Looking at the hand Batistuta extended to him, Neymar took a deep breath, raised his signature smile, and used the force to stand up.

"Well, shoot through him in the second half!"

……

1
What the hell did Brazil play in the first half! There was no coordination, no tactics, just relying on the individual abilities of a few stars to hit the goal. The opponent was Navas, so it was impossible for them to score!
2
The first big win, floating

3
It's OK. Judging from the pre-match state, Brazil was a bit loose. Neymar and Batistuta were still talking and laughing. Navas was in good shape. I guess even his teammates didn't expect it.
4
Brazil will lose the ball if this continues
5
Brazil is a typical example of playing too much. They won the first game 4-1 and withstood so many fouls. They thought they were awesome and Costa Rica was no problem. I am sure Brazil will have no chance this year. At most they will make the top 16.

6
Kneel down to Nadal

7
After watching the first half, I felt that Costa Rica had a chance to steal one.

8
This year is really weird, the strong teams are upset one after another, Germany lost, Argentina was beaten 3-0, wait and see, Brazil will also have an upset today
9
A Neymar and a Batistuta, shaking their heads, not paying attention

10
LOL, the above guy is on the wrong channel
11
They are all fucking cowards!! The group should just go home!!!
12
???
Where do these trolls who don't even watch the game come from?

13
The gambler is just losing his defense, ignore him
14
Don't panic, don't panic, my city's BBB is the king of desperate situations. If he doesn't score in the first half, he's saving up his ultimate move for the last time.

……

At the start of the second half, neither side made any substitutions and the situation did not change. Almost 60 minutes in, the score was still 0-0. The game was tense and both sides were waiting, hoping that a player would step forward.

Brazil got their chance first.

Some fans really predicted it right. At the critical moment, Batty stepped up to break the deadlock on the court.

But this goal is more——

Ugh, bizarre.

In the 65th minute of the second half, Brazil seized the loophole in Costa Rica's midfield. Casemiro made a straight pass to Neymar in the frontcourt. Neymar dribbled the ball and broke through on the left. Asscota did not dare to rush forward. He chose to block the passing route, which gave Neymar the opportunity to make a high cross.

Firmino headed the ball in front of the goal and there was chaos in the Costa Rican penalty area. Navas rushed out and tried to hold the ball, but his teammate misjudged the ball and the two collided with each other. The ball got out of control, hit the ground and bounced out of the penalty area.

Batistuta made a run in from the ribs and was about to touch the ball.

Costa Rican midfielder Borges returned to intercept, but he made a mistake in his haste and was tripped by the grass. He subconsciously reached out to grab the nearest leverage point, which was Batistuta.

...ball shorts.

Batty didn't like wearing tight jerseys and shorts, which always made him feel tight and restrained, so when Borges grabbed his trouser legs, he easily pulled half of his shorts to his knees. The boy, disturbed by the shorts, lost his balance at that moment and fell to the grass in front of him.

[Oh! The Costa Rican defender accidentally fell while chasing back and pulled down the shorts of Brazilian teenager Batistuta! ]

This is huge news!

For people who don’t usually watch football and only join in the fun during the World Cup, a handsome guy’s butt is much more beautiful to look at than who scores a goal!
The broadcast camera shamelessly focused on Batistuta's exposed underwear, and now the whole world knew that he was wearing white boxer briefs with bright red lips printed on them.

The comment section of the live broadcast of the game was instantly flooded with “Hahahaha” and “You’re so sexy.jpg”

To some extent, Borges achieved his goal.

But this is not over yet.

On the football field, anything can happen.

Under the gaze of millions of people around the world, Batistuta fell to the ground, and the official ball of the Russian World Cup hit him right on the head, drawing a beautiful arc and bouncing into the net.

"Holy crap! Are you serious?! This ball went in!" A fan in front of the TV jumped up from the sofa excitedly, "How could this be - this, this is too outrageous!"

At the same time, fans around the world were amazed.

The director was considerate enough to provide a slow-motion replay, with Batistuta's shorts being pulled off several times from different angles, allowing people to clearly see the entire process of the goal.

All I can say is that in the past minute, the goddess of luck fell on Batty's head.

Hot on Twitter:
What is the Hand of God?
Look at this ass that has the goalkeeper and God mesmerized.
What else can stop this team?

Of course, what is certain is that Navas was definitely not fooled by Batistuta's hip curve. His vision was obstructed due to his position, and he had just bumped into his teammate and was seeing stars. By the time he reacted and wanted to stop it, it was too late.

Batistuta, whose shorts were pulled off, scored a goal by accident!
It was a wonderful diving header!

Not only the fans who were watching the game did not expect this, but also the players on the field, including the person who scored the goal, did not expect this.

Batistuta was fumbling to pull up his pants and was about to turn around and curse the defensive player, but when he turned around, the ball went in!

Barty blinked.

I just shot a goal?
Before he could figure out what was going on, Neymar came over to him with an expression that could not hide his excitement. Marcelo and Casemiro pulled him up together, and then slapped his butt wildly to celebrate.

"Thank God for giving us such a wonderful ass! Praise the Lord!"

Batty's expression froze.

1-0!

In the 66th minute of the second half, thanks to Batistuta's butt (crossed out), a diving header gave Brazil a 1-0 lead!

(End of this chapter)