[Football] Bad Boy Batty

After the game, Batistuta was named the MVP of the game with 2 goals and 1 assist. The trophy was sponsored by Budweiser, and it was all red, like a two-wheeled skateboard standing upright. Batistuta held the trophy like a bouquet of flowers and accepted media interviews obediently.

[Congratulations on winning the best player of the game. Do you have anything to say? ]

Batty: "It feels good. I have won MVP awards in many competitions. This is my first time in the World Cup, but it's nothing different."

[You are now the youngest person to score twice in a World Cup debut since 1966. How does it feel? ]

Batistuta: "Very good, I like the feeling of scoring goals."

[How do you think the team performed? Can it be better? ]

Batistuta: "We (Brazil) played well, but we could have done better. If we had seized some chances in the first half, the score would have been different."

The interview started off normal, but as the questions got deeper, the reporter started asking some very controversial questions.

[Your team was fouled 24 times in total, Neymar was the most fouled, and you were the second most fouled. So what do you think is the reason for this statistic? Is it the characteristics of Brazilian football?]

Batistuta frowned fiercely: "No, fouling is Switzerland's tactic. No team should be treated like this. They are simply crazy! They fouled us when they couldn't stop us from advancing. This is too shameless!"

He was indignant and continued, "I saw a lot of people online saying, 'Oh, you Brazilians play football too ostentatiously, you love to show off your skills, you deserve to be kicked.' What's the difference between this kind of damn talk and complaining that the girls who were molested were wearing too little? Victim-blaming theory? Those who can say this are bastards!"

Barty was clearly irritated by the question.

He wanted to say something else, but when he saw the camera was pointed at him, he hesitated.

Batty asked: "Will your interviews be post-processed before being broadcast on TV?"

[Uh, yes, what do you want to do? ]

After getting the answer, Batti nodded with satisfaction, then he raised his middle finger to the camera.

Batistuta: "No one can stop us. I won't stop showing off my skills! Neymar won't either! All Brazilian players won't! Did you hear that, you bastards!! FU*K YOU!"

The show was surprisingly effective, and even the reporter was stunned. While Batty was in high spirits, the reporter quickly organized his words and continued to ask controversial questions to attract traffic.

[You had a shot in the second half that hit Behrami in the face. Behrami caused you and all the Brazilian players a lot of trouble during the game. Was that intentional?]

Batistuta raised his eyebrows: "Of course not, I just wanted to score a goal. The score was 2-1 at the time, and we were only one goal ahead, which was not safe, so all I could think about was scoring a goal. How could I have the energy to deliberately hurt him?"

Batty continued: "He did foul us, but that was for the game, I can understand. I heard that he had a nosebleed for a long time after being kicked by me. Oh - I really feel sorry for what happened to him."

How could he admit such a problem? Batty sneered in his heart. The more he apologized to Behrami on the surface, the more refreshed he felt in his heart. Nosebleed? That was a bargain for him!
【Let’s talk about your relationship with Neymar. 】

Batistuta chuckled: "We are good friends. It's fun to play with him. He is a talented player. Sometimes when we review the game, we will discuss the handling of certain balls. He always has very good ideas. I like him, of course, except for his strange aesthetics, such as the pile of pasta on his head."

[It sounds like you have a good relationship, but you seemed to have had an argument during the game just now. What was that about? ]

Batty was stunned: "We had a fight?"

He blinked: "Why didn't I know this?"

The reporter was also stunned by his question. After a few seconds, the reporter reacted and described to Batistuta the scene in which Batistuta complained to Neymar with his arms open when Neymar was in a rage and he did not pass the ball to his teammates.

[That’s when you guys weren’t arguing? ]

Batty raised his lips and said, "It wasn't a quarrel. Well, maybe it was a quarrel. He would rather be surrounded than pass the ball. I complained to him a few times. It turned out that his behavior was out of control after he got angry. Later, I did the same."

("Bati, are you ok? Why did you take so long to be interviewed? We have celebrated in the locker room!")
Batistuta turned toward the player tunnel and smiled when he saw the person coming. Then he winked at the camera and pointed: "Look, the one who quarreled with me is here."

The boy waved, and soon Neymar appeared in front of the camera. The Paris star had already changed into a new training shirt and was holding another one in his hand, probably for Batistuta.

Batistuta hooked Neymar's neck, almost hanging on him, and put his fist pretending to be a microphone next to Neymar's mouth: "They said we had a quarrel, what do you think about this?"

Neymar's reaction was almost the same as Batistuta's just now. He was also stunned. He turned his head and looked at Batistuta: "When did you quarrel with me again without my knowledge?"

Batty raised an eyebrow: "What do you mean I quarreled with you, and when you didn't know?"

Batty again: "And why 'again'?"

"Because you just like to get angry with me. Many times I don't know why." Neymar joked. Perhaps he was happy about winning by a large margin, so he deliberately said this in front of the camera to tease Batistuta. "For example, the day before yesterday, I just fixed my hair and you slammed the door and left. I had to go to Ederson to ask you to come back."

Batistuta got up from Neymar and angrily hit him on the arm with the trophy: "You stayed in the bathroom for 2 hours! Just for your few strands of noodle hair, and I haven't taken a shower yet. I feel so uncomfortable. How dare you blame me for this!"

Neymar took advantage of the situation and hooked Batistuta's shoulders and kissed him on the cheek: "My getting my hair done doesn't conflict with your showering. You can go in, you take your shower and I'll get mine done."

The two of them just performed in front of the camera as if no one was around. The reporter's face gradually became expressionless from the initial excitement to the final look of despair.

("Come back soon you two! We're going back!")
Batistuta and Neymar temporarily stopped fighting. They waved at the camera, then walked back with their shoulders and waists hooked like conjoined twins. On the way, they had a new round of quarrel because Batistuta refused to change his clothes.

reporter:……

After a long pause, the reporter stared at the camera with lemon eyes.

Reporter: "When we get back, tell the post-production team not to edit the second half of the interview."

Camera: (thumbs up)
The interview was released an hour later and indeed sparked a massive discussion. Seeing that everyone looked as if their hearts were struck, the reporters and cameramen felt much better.

Hot on Twitter:
Quarrel (×)
Flirting (√)

……

The day after the match between Brazil and Switzerland, the first round of the World Cup group stage was over. Brazil ranked first in Group E with 3 points and 3 goals difference, and was one of the few popular teams that did not cause an upset.

Argentina ranked second in the group with 1 point, Portugal and Spain also ranked second and third with 1 point, Germany's situation is even more serious, they have 0 points, relying on the advantage of less fouls to barely rank ahead of South Korea, not to the bottom. France, England, and Belgium are in normal situations, if nothing unexpected happens, there is no pressure to qualify from the group.

Given that everyone in the national team faces different situations, Manchester City's chat group has been quiet these days. Everyone has chosen to create small groups and private chats. Many people congratulated Batistuta on winning the MVP and ranking second in the scorer list.

As someone at the top of the food chain within the team, Batistuta calculated that there were 30 people in the group of Manchester City's first team without Guardiola and the coaching staff (several from the youth training team were also included). He was pulled into 12 small groups, and he was sure that there were other groups he had not joined.

B席 is the most popular among them. Batty asked him indirectly that he has 18 small groups.

Of course, the players did not do anything shameful in the small group or specifically scold any teammate. It’s just that during the World Cup, some national team secrets cannot be disclosed to anyone except their close friends.

"Belgium is in great form this year, beating Panama 4-0. Kevin's free kick was really beautiful, but he seems to have plagiarized me."

Batistuta and Neymar were next to the swimming pool of the Brazilian team hotel. While everyone else was doing physical therapy, only the two of them finished first and occupied the swimming pool.

He had just received a call from De Bruyne one minute ago. The Belgian midfielder scored directly from a free kick in the game that just ended, helping his country to a 1-4 victory and get off to a good start.

As for why the call only lasted one minute, just look at Neymar's expression next to him.

Yes.

Batty deliberately answered the phone in front of him.

"Why do you keep mentioning that guy? We won, and we won a tough match beautifully." Neymar, wearing a changed swimming trunks, crossed his arms and looked at Batistuta with dissatisfaction, "You keep talking about how beautiful his goal was, but it was just a free kick. Mine was a header."

"Yes, yes, your header is also great." Batistuta raised his head and smiled quickly at Neymar, then lowered his head again, with a perfunctory taste almost overflowing, "I just praised Kevin a few words. Kevin was not the only one who called me. Others besides Kevin also called me. I just talked to Kevin a little more."

Kevin Kevin Kevin...

Neymar's brain is filled with countless 'Kevins'.

Then, poof, it exploded.

Seeing that Neymar's expression became strange, Batistuta quickly dropped his phone and ran into the swimming pool to soak. After all, this is the public space of the Brazilian national team, and Neymar would not and dared not do anything to him.

"Come down quickly Ney, otherwise it'll be all - hiss! So cold!" Batty was shivering from the water temperature. The team had deliberately lowered the water temperature so that the players could quickly recover their body functions.

He swam half a circle in the water to warm up his body and then returned to the side. Neymar was still standing there, as if he was under a petrified spell.

Batistuta lay on the edge of the swimming pool and tilted his head to look at Neymar: "Come down quickly, what are you thinking about?"

Neymar didn't say anything, just looked at Batistuta, and then walked towards the swimming pool step by step very deliberately.

Batistuta followed him closely, not understanding what Neymar wanted to do. He blinked and said, "This is how my godfather and Leonardo first met. He was in the swimming pool and the guy was on the shore. Guess what happened next?"

"I'm only wearing swimming trunks and no collar, you can't pull me down." Neymar squatted down.

Batistuta was still lying on the edge of the pool, Neymar less than a meter in front of him. He looked into those eyes, and they looked like honey under the indoor lights.

"What do you want to do?" Batty asked softly.

Neymar didn't answer the question, he looked at Batistuta and smiled.

This situation lasted for about half a minute, and just when the ambiguity in the air was about to dissipate, Neymar suddenly moved.

"Come up." He hooked his finger at Batty.

"what?"

"Have you seen the Little Mermaid?" Neymar said. "She sings while propped up on a rock. It's a classic Disney scene. I want you to do that, too."

Batty blinked his confused eyes.

"That's what I want from you," Neymar added. "Is that okay?"

Things are getting more interesting.

Batistuta couldn't guess what Neymar was trying to do. But -

That's the fun.

"Okay." He agreed.

Batty smoothed his wet hair, supported his hands on the edge of the swimming pool, and raised his upper body. He pressed his abdomen against the edge of the pool, just like the little mermaid in his impression.

"Is this what you wanted—"

He couldn't finish his teasing because Neymar reached out and pinched his entire jaw, forcing him to turn his head to the side. Batistuta only had time to see the triumphant smile on the other's lips before he felt a chill on his neck and something drew several circles on his skin.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

About 5 seconds later, Neymar let go of Batistuta, stepped back, touched his chin and admired his masterpiece with satisfaction.

Batty could only look over there in confusion, not knowing what was happening.

……

Let's go back 10 seconds.

Neymar, who had just clamped Batistuta's jaw, quickly took out a pen from the back of his swimming trunks. He had hidden it while Batistuta was swimming. On the day they returned to the hotel after the game, some fans asked for autographs at the door, and he took the pen from a fan there.

There was no particular reason, except that the color of the pen was bright blue (sea salt blue), which reminded him of Batty's eyes when he first saw it. Under the sunlight, they would be as beautiful as the color of the pen.

After quickly controlling Batistuta, Neymar took out the pen, bit off the pen cap with his teeth, and quickly signed his name on Batistuta's collarbone, which is the hollow of his neck.

Who told him to always mention that Belgian? Whose name is closer to him now?
Blue eyes, blue name, it's all on Batty.

Neymar was very happy with this.

……

There was another person who was also very satisfied, and that was Marcelo who had been peeking at the door for a long time.

The Real Madrid defender believes that it is all thanks to him that Neymar and Batistuta can get together.

From the time he gave the other team some advice last Christmas to the time he just drove away all the teammates who wanted to come in in order to ensure their "happy time".

If they get married after retiring, he can tell all these legendary experiences. It feels really bad to keep secrets, Marcelo thought.

"Hey, what are you looking at?"

Marcelo was startled and turned around to see that it was his Real Madrid teammate Casemiro.

This made the Real Madrid defender breathe a sigh of relief.

Casemiro is a very nice person. He won't talk about other people's secrets. He is conscientious on the field and doesn't mess around off the field. Marcelo rolled his eyes and made some space for his teammates.

"See for yourself," he said.

Casemiro hesitantly leaned over to take a look, then screamed like his little daughter when she saw My Little Pony, and Marcelo immediately covered his mouth: "Shh - it will be over if they find out."

Real Madrid's midfielder's eyes were full of surprise. After Marcelo made sure that he would not make any more noise and let him go, he opened his mouth and made the sound of "Wow" with his mouth.

"Neymar and Batistuta?"

“Bati and Neymar??”

Marcelo nodded, looking forward to Casemiro's next reaction.

Casemiro just sighed and shook his head.

“They’re so sweet.”

……

By the time Batistuta found Neymar signing his neck, it was already time for dinner. When he walked into the buffet with his plate, everyone smiled at him.

"Don't you like looking in the mirror?" Alves patted his shoulder while trying not to laugh. "My suggestion is, go now. There's a surprise waiting for you."

Batty followed his advice.

When he looked in the mirror and saw the blue "Neymar Jr", Neymar was leaning out of the door and Batistuta rolled his eyes at him.

"Are you childish?" He made a few faces and tried to wash off his name in front of Neymar.

Then--

"Ney?"

"what happened?"

"What kind of pen do you use?"

"I asked for a pen from a fan. Is there a problem?"

“Yes, it’s a big problem.”

"what?"

"This thing——why can't I wash it off?!"

Neymar: !!!

Wouldn't that be better?

Neymar: "Just think of it as a tattoo. My signature is very beautiful and many people have it tattooed on...Pfft!"

Before he could finish his words, a slippery soap flew towards him through the air. Neymar hurriedly lowered his head to avoid it. When he looked up again, an angry Batistuta appeared in front of him.

"I think you've forgotten how hard I hit you, right?" The boy cracked his knuckles. "Today, I'll let you remember!"

Neymar turned and ran.

……

Later that day, Ederson ran to the hotel library to find something to do because he had to hand in his phone before bed, and happened to run into Neymar here.

The Paris star stood behind a bookshelf that was more than half a person's height, smiled and waved at him: "You are here to look for books, right? I have screened them in advance, and the interesting ones are all on the table. Take what you want to read."

strangeness.

Ederson nodded, and hesitantly picked up a few novels from the table that looked very explosive. But just as he lowered his head, he vaguely heard a sound behind the bookcase on Neymar's side.

The sound was very strange, and it was hard to tell what it was. It sounded like a small animal, or someone crying.

not--

Hotel Ghost Bar!
Ederson shuddered violently, looked up and saw Neymar still smiling at him. He was so scared that the hairs on his body stood up. He did not even bother to choose a book, and ran out of the library backwards before his legs went weak.

Half an hour later, word spread throughout the Brazilian team that Neymar was haunted by a ghost.

The truth is that when Ederson left, both Neymar and the 'ghost' breathed a sigh of relief.

"Oh my God, don't come to a place like this again next time!" Batty lay on the ground with all his strength, then reached out to push away a few strands of wet hair.

"Didn't you suggest this?" Neymar moved twice, then reached out to pick up Batistuta's collapsed moon. "You're awesome, dear. It looks like we won't need extra assistance next time. Just make some noise from other people, and it'll be like rain here."

"...Shut up." Batty rolled his eyes and kicked his calf. "Who would do this if they didn't want to use it before you put on the glow-in-the-dark paint?"

That’s right, glow-in-the-dark paint, that pen.

Neymar's name signed on the back of his neck had not been washed off yet, so Batistuta decided to punish him and add some color to his neck. When drawing lots to decide where to add color, Neymar drew **.

"You dug a hole for yourself and then jumped into it. How can you blame me?" Neymar smiled and looked at his watch. He grabbed Batistuta's left hand and squeezed it. "The sir will go to check on the ward in 10 minutes. We have to hurry."

Batty: ...

Okay, just wait for me.

……

The night before the match against Costa Rica, Tite called a meeting with the players. In order to make the slides clearer, the room was darkened. Until Neymar entered the field, he was like a glowing light ball, and everyone's eyes were immediately focused on him.

To be precise, it was concentrated on his pants.

Neymar was extremely embarrassed, he didn't expect that the glow pen would be so bright after being fully applied.

Batistuta was happy. He sat next to Neymar with his arms folded, and occasionally praised his shining brilliance. In comparison, the signature on his neck was simply not worth mentioning.

Before the meeting started, Alves patted Neymar from behind.

"A few glow-in-the-dark ones." He gave a thumbs-up. "So cool!"

(End of this chapter)