Uneasy daily life

Three drunken men with superb martial arts skills sensed the powerful man's murderous aura and, drunk, subconsciously attacked.

Anjie Xuande took out a pair of paper swords, one male and one female.

Oreki Kugenaga took out the Green Snake Crescent Paper Knife.

Biqi Gu Yide raised the Li Ba snake paper spear.

The four of them clashed in the blink of an eye, but they were just three drunken fools who were beaten to the ground in less than a single exchange.

Princess Kaguya leaped towards Emperor Zaimokuza, causing chaos and destruction wherever she went.

Even the general, hailed as the strongest in the army, couldn't withstand a single move from Fang Tian's drawing paper.

It can truly be said that a demon lord descended from heaven, and a deity of the mortal realm!

"You...you...who exactly are you?!"

"I am Princess Kaguya of Hourai—!"

With a loud shout, Emperor Zaimokuza was terrified and turned to flee.

"The one with his name on his chest is the Emperor!" Ange Xuande shouted, then tilted his head and started snoring.

Emperor Zaimukzata quickly threw away the sticker on his chest.

"The one with the sword at his waist is the Emperor!" Oreki Kugenaga exclaimed, then lay down and fell asleep.

Emperor Zaimokuza suddenly threw the paper sword from his waist.

"The one with the crown on his head is the Emperor!" Hikigaya Takatoku shouted with a start, then opened his eyes and began to snore soundly as if he were fast asleep.

Emperor Zaimokuza hurriedly raised his hand to take off the crown, hesitated for a moment, and chose to hold it in his arms. Unexpectedly, in the midst of running and bumping, his hand trembled and the crown fell to the ground.

He stepped on the crown and tripped, falling to the ground.

As I looked up, Fangtian's drawing paper came into view—

puff!

The emperor, suddenly.

"Princess Kaguya murdered the Emperor, her crimes compounded, and she was ultimately transformed into a bamboo forest. Legend has it that the leaves in the bamboo forest can discern the sincerity of one person's feelings for another. If lovers write down each other's names and two bamboo leaves remain evergreen, they will receive Princess Kaguya's blessing..."

The white figure discarded the drawing paper, put on a wig, and spun away as she walked off the stage.

He stepped past Yoshiteru Zaimokuza, who was lying on the ground pretending to be dead, and delivered a flawless voiceover to bring the story to a close.

"After a night, the three brothers woke up rubbing their heads and found themselves asleep in a bamboo forest. They assumed that they hadn't been able to control their bodies to go home after getting drunk the night before. But as the three brothers discussed it, they discovered that they had all had very similar dreams the night before. A celestial maiden appeared in their dreams and called them unparalleled heroes."

"So the three of them took some wine, recruited a group of local militia, and set off into the chaotic world to make their mark."

"The End."

Background voiceover: Bai Ying.

Sound effects and voice-over: Bai Ying.

Voice actor: Bai Ying.

Princess Kaguya: White Shadow.

Zaimokuza Emperor's Awkward Actor: Zaimokuza Yoshiki.

Angelina Jolie's awkward acting.

Oreki Houtarou is an awkward actor who plays Oreki Kurenai.

Hikigaya Ichide's awkward acting: Hikigaya Hachi...

Minister, I beg you, please stop! Spare my life!

The moment Bai Ying announced the end of the play, the group immediately scrambled to their feet and scattered like birds and beasts, covering their faces as they fled.

Even Yoshiteru Zaimoto, who suffers from chuunibyou (middle school syndrome), dared not linger. The surrounding area and the corridors of the school building above were filled with bewildered spectators—yesterday, I really shouldn't have agreed to Master so easily!

Hachiman Hikigaya rushed towards the white figure to stop him from adding fuel to the fire of his dark past.

……

Yukino Yukinoshita silently rubbed her forehead, her feelings complicated.

How should I put it... top-tier to inhuman dubbing and voice variation, terrible acting, at best individual actors' expressions and movements, and a drama that always felt like it had a lot of things stitched together...

Indescribable.

This kind of art is still too early for humankind.

Chapter 73 What kind of theater troupe are you?!

It's over. I feel like I've lost something important. Komachi, my brother is no longer pure...

Hachiman Hikigaya leaned back in his chair, his eyes vacant.

I'm too ashamed to face anyone. My youthful school life is over prematurely. Let me go experience the scheming and backstabbing of the superpowered world, sob sob...

Angelina covered her face and lay on the table, too ashamed to be seen.

I must have been out of my mind to agree to act in such an extremely energy-consuming drama—I wanted a gray youth, not a colorful but dark one…

Houtarou Oreki rested his cheek on his hand, remaining motionless.

"Smash them all! Smash them all!"

"Look at what you've done! Your faces are as stiff as dead men, your movements are worse than puppets, and your expressions are all copied and pasted from beginning to end! Even the last-minute addition, the woodworker, acted better than you! At least he could throw his badge, swing his sword, and hold his crown! What about you? Even a cat is more expressive than you!"

General Bai Ying, who is in charge of the entire operation, including the director, voice actor, planner, scriptwriter, and ninety percent of things, is pacing back and forth giving instructions.

Yui Yuigahama and Yukino Yukinoshita stood at the doorway, peeked inside for a moment, and then quickly withdrew.

The two exchanged a silent glance.

Yui Yuigahama muttered to herself, "Let's wait until Shiro finishes speaking before we go in..."

“Yes.” Yukino Yukinoshita nodded.

What if Bai Ying feels that the play at noon wasn't good enough and decides to do it again?

As a viewer, after watching or listening to the entire play, my brain was trembling, and I was about to experience some indescribable changes.

To personally participate in the entire performance is probably a sign of a serious lack of reason—look at the three people inside, who, in a moment of carelessness, sold their souls to the devil and are now reduced to ashes after being burned.

“You say you haven’t studied drama and can’t do the movements, OK! You can at least walk, right? You just need to know how to walk, and leave the rest to me. You say you can’t remember the script and don’t know what to say, OK! I’ll take care of that. You just need to follow what I say, act on your own initiative, and give the audience the feeling that it’s real. You say there’s too little time to prepare and rent props, OK! That’s okay too. Simplicity and contrast is also a form of expression. Art doesn’t have to be confined to the ornate and exquisite.”

"Worried that without a stage, the play won't be able to achieve its promotional effect? ​​That's no problem either! I'll raise the volume and make the play driven and expressed through sound. You guys just need to coordinate, move around a bit, act a little, and make it look like it's real—you don't even need to move your lips!"

"Is this acceptable?! Huh?!"

Bai Ying reached out and pulled over a chair, facing the trio behind the reception table. He slapped his thigh and sighed wistfully, "Look at you three—aren't you all my capable subordinates? Aren't you all my loyal henchmen? Aren't you all the thorns in my side that I wish I could get rid of? If you don't act well, the whole play will be ruined. If the play is completely bad, how can it leave a deep impression on the audience? How can it fulfill the publicity mission? How can it solve my niece Aru's request?!"

His capable subordinate, Hachiman Hikigaya, managed a flicker of light in his lifeless eyes: "Minister, didn't you say this was a romance drama?"

I thought I'd at least get to see a joke about the women's clothing department head... but did I actually get to see it?

Princess Kaguya, trapped inside a paper tube, shattered the tube with a roar. Wielding a paper halberd, she moved with the stride of a dragon and the gait of a tiger, unmatched in her path. Accompanied by human voices, her power was so strong it defied description.

Bai Ying frowned: "Where is it not about romance?"

Angelina, a staunch follower, covered her face and muttered, "This isn't romantic at all! I've become the weirdo everyone talks about. During breaks, my deskmate jokingly calls me Angela Xuande... My life is over, my youth is gone, and I have to carry this weird nickname through high school. I can't do anything anymore, sob sob..."

"Ridiculous! You think romance novels are like Romeo and Juliet, Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai, or Princess Kaguya and the Emperor from The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter? Those kinds of things, if there are spotlights and a stage, and skilled actors who are good at rehearsing and reciting lines, can produce a decent effect—but let's not even talk about the troublesome external conditions. Just look at the actors! If I asked you to act, could you act? No! How can you act if you don't have the skill?!"

Bai Ying shook his head and said, "The so-called 'taking an unconventional approach' means taking the most unconventional route to achieve the best results! We have no funds, no time, and no actors. Without some drastic measures, how can we create a sensation? You really don't know the basics when you're not in charge!"

Houtarou Oreki, the biggest worry, barely managed to analyze the situation: "That's true. At least for now, this play has become the talk of the town during the lunch break and afternoon... If we only consider the effect, it is indeed very effective. And if you think about it carefully, the play highlights the theme of 'a book title with bamboo leaves, true and evergreen,' which is very impressive."

The actors essentially contributed some metaphysical concepts, such as integrity, shame, and reputation...

Hachiman Hikigaya muttered, "Minister, we're just newbies who were thrown into this role, it's asking too much of us..."

"You guys are all too young."

Bai Ying sighed in a mature tone, "Indeed, we shouldn't have gone easy on you yesterday. We should have provided you with psychological counseling and performance rehearsals according to the troupe's standards."

Angelina parted her fingers, revealing her eyes: "Standards for theater, theater troupes? For example?"

"Let me tell you a story, it was when I first joined the theater troupe."

Bai Ying recalled: "When I first joined the troupe, I started with odd jobs such as moving equipment, learning about costumes, and fighting wits with scoundrels. After a while, the troupe leader took me to the street and said he was going to give me a simple test."

"He randomly pointed to a young man walking while looking at his phone and told me to make that man laugh first and then be terrified—within the time limit of the man walking down this road. How do you think we can do this?"

Hachiman Hikigaya immediately replied, "I can't do it."

I don't want to do it either!

Angelina pondered, "Laugh first... then show fear? Tell a joke? People on the street aren't going to stop to listen to a joke..."

Houtarou Oreki asked directly, "Shirokage completed the test, right? How did you do it?"

"After a moment's thought, I observed the young man looking at his phone and deduced that he seemed to have a rather modern mindset, was in a good mood, and had a slightly smug smile—probably chatting with his girlfriend. I ran up to him, pretended to slip, and fell to the ground in a seemingly exaggerated yet normal manner. He subconsciously smiled, about to casually ask a question..."

Bai Ying said in a deep voice, "I stared at his crotch for three seconds. He glanced at his zipper and saw that it was zipped up. He looked puzzled and then became curious. I immediately stood up, put on a warm smile, and reached out to greet him—he stepped back, suddenly realized, and hurriedly left in a bit of fear."

The three of them leaned back in unison.

"As expected, simply rehearsing your movements yesterday was a mistake," Bai Ying sighed. "We should have learned from the troupe leader's beginner-level basic training..."

Don’t do that kind of thing!!!

Hachiman Hikigaya tried to change the subject: "So, the department head passed the audition and successfully joined the theater troupe, right?"

Bai Ying said, "The commander barely gave me a passing grade, saying that I was the worst one in the assessment."

The worst one? Who are the others?!

Angelina's curiosity was piqued, and she asked, "Chang, Baiying, how did the others pass the test?"

“The assessment is different for everyone, and not everyone in a troupe is an actor.” Bai Ying recalled for a moment and said, “Kuiying is good at opera performances. The troupe leader’s assessment for him was in a very remote place where there were almost no pedestrians on the street. He was required to sing a song and attract at least ten audience members.”

"Does that guild leader have some serious illness?" Hachiman Hikigaya thought to himself.

"And then what happened?" Angelina was completely curious.

Bai Ying said, "The troupe leader said he sang a song without lyrics, relying entirely on rhythm and sound. Seven or eight birds landed on him, and wild cats from miles around gathered around him within the time it took to sing the song, not to mention the people peeking out of the windows to watch. The total number of spectators far exceeded ten."

Are you sure this isn't a fantasy story? What kind of theater troupe are you?!

The three looked at each other, and found that Bai Ying's assessment process was actually quite normal, even reasonable.

"So you guys are still too green. Based on my observation, what you need to overcome most right now is 'common sense.' I'll give you targeted training over the weekend..."

Hachiman Hikigaya: "I'm going to stay with Komachi."

Angelina: "I want to watch the show."

Houtarou Oreki: "I need to do my homework."

"Is that so?"

The white figure let out an aged sigh and said calmly, "Sigh, busy, everyone's busy... It's good to be busy."

The three remained unmoved, revealing their iron-willed, cold-hearted nature, completely forgetting even the friendship they shared while acting in a play together.

"Uncle Bai, Uncle Bai, Uncle Bai—Hey? Yukinoshita-san, Yuigahama-san, what are you doing here? Why don't you go inside?"

A slight commotion arose at the doorway, and the people inside looked out. Chitanda Eru excitedly ran into the activity room, while Yukino Yukinoshita and Yui Yuigahama cautiously followed behind.

Bai Ying smiled reservedly: "Niece Ailiu, what do you think of my plan?"

"A very interesting play!"

Chitanda Eru gave it high praise, causing everyone except Hakuei to question her aesthetic sense.

“Everyone was discussing the formation, so I gave them a brief introduction, which is why I’m a little late. The theatrical performance seems to have been a great success!” Chitanda Eru looked at Oreki Houtarou and remarked with considerable surprise, “I never expected Oreki-kun to do something so daring…”

"what……"

Houtarou Oreki looked away, studying the shape of the ceiling, and said quietly, "Me too."

I have a feeling that I'm being controlled by some evil force, causing me to engage in such energy-intensive activities...

After the initial excitement, Chitanda Eru remembered the important matter and anxiously asked, "Uncle Haku, there's no custom of writing names on bamboo leaves when going out to battle. My classmates asked me, and I didn't know what to say!"