Sister Yanzi squatted down and kept comforting him. Lu Yueyuan's sobbing finally subsided, but he still kept shedding tears. Who could accept this? This reunion was only for the sake of future separation. Who could accept that? He could only reluctantly listen to Sister Yanzi's comforting words, but he still held her hand tightly, as if that would prevent him from leaving.
Why can't we let him and Sister Yanzi leave together? They're both dead anyway... It would be so much better if he died too.
"Dying is an easy thing."
"You have to be strong. Little Stone is still alive. She needs you. What will happen to her if you die with me?"
"Do you know what a swallow is? Every year when winter is approaching, it flies south, which is when the rice paddies wither. But when the wheat fields are rippled by the wind the following year, they will return from the south. Just think of me as a swallow flying south. One day, I will fly back and meet you again when the wheat fields are surging like waves."
Sister Yan squatted down and stroked Lu Yueyuan's head, and as she stroked him, she herself started to cry.
Lu Yueyuan didn't want to say a word. He stubbornly held her hand and leaned against her chest. This was his only warmth and light.
“I, I also can’t bear to leave you… I want to be with you forever. You know, when that family from the neighboring village came looking for you, I was frantic. I was so afraid that your parents would agree and that you would agree too. Luckily, you refused. At that moment, I knew that my boy would definitely be with me. But how could this happen? How could I die? I’m so sorry for leaving you behind and making you face all this alone.”
Lu Yueyuan also shed tears, sniffling constantly. What? Dead? He couldn't accept it. This couldn't be a hallucination, it couldn't be a hallucination. He desperately tried to hypnotize himself, but he knew very well that there were no surging wheat fields in reality right now. This wasn't real, none of it was real. So the hypnosis turned into prayer. He prayed to the gods, hoping to get Sister Yanzi back to him.
Whoosh, whoosh, the wind was blowing, making a rustling sound. If it were an illusion, how could it feel so real?
"Tell me a way, please, Sister Yanzi, tell me how to keep you here." Lu Yueyuan pleaded, crying. He wasn't some mountain king; he was just a little boy with this humble wish.
But no one responded to his wish; even the gods would only scoff. Ultimately, in such an illusory world, who would care about him? Lu Yueyuan slowly realized that he could no longer keep Sister Yanzi. In reality, she was already dead. No matter what, she was dead; the dead and the things that have passed cannot be brought back.
"I don't want to..."
Sister Yanzi sat on the ground, and he lay on her knees. No matter how willful or sad he was, it was no use; the truth was the truth, and it wouldn't change. He looked up and could see Sister Yanzi's face, which was trying to suppress her sorrow but was smiling. How similar she was in his illusion to her in reality!
Is there any way...?
"Time... is running out. You'll wake up soon. Let's say goodbye properly. I don't want your last impression of me to be only sadness," Sister Yanzi said.
Be strong, Lu Yueyuan. You have to be strong. It's just parting, there's nothing to be sad about. People always have to experience separation and death. Didn't you think about this when you were little? It's just that the time has come a little earlier, it's nothing.
But I haven't spent a wonderful life with her yet, Lu Yueyuan cried, unable to convince himself.
"Okay, okay, I... don't want to be sad either..." Lu Yueyuan forced a smile. "I will smile as I part from you..."
Ah! This is impossible. He can't even tell if he's crying or laughing. His face must be contorted, and the dense emotions are tearing him apart and driving him mad. He feels that the seed of becoming a monster has taken root in his heart. That's how people are; anyone can go crazy under these kinds of emotions.
“Farewell, um, a proper farewell.” He laughed tremblingly, his face monstrous.
So they walked hand in hand through the wheat field, and in the distance came villages, mountains, and rivers... [That was our past.] Lu Yueyuan thought to himself, but how could there be so little of the past? Tears streamed down his face as he smiled. There was only the past, and only a vain future. This was the most despairing thing.
"Will I still be able to dream about you?" Lu Yueyuan asked.
“We… will meet again,” Sister Swallow said. “It’s just that it’s too cold in winter now, so I went to the warm south, just like a real swallow.”
“You have to come back. The South isn’t all warm. It gets really hot there in the summer,” Lu Yueyuan said, unable to control his expression.
"I'll be back..." Sister Yanzi kissed his forehead. "So until I come back, you have to take good care of yourself, eat well, and sleep well, understand?"
Lu Yueyuan wept, the wind howled, and his mournful voice echoed through the sky:
The wind blows across the wheat field, blowing away my old clothes.
Swallows fly south, over the old dike.
The western bank of the river is covered with white poplars, their rustling leaves adding to the desolate scene.
The living must part as if to die; I swallow my sobs and tears soak my clothes.
There are no inns in the underworld; where shall I find lodging tonight?
They sat on the hillside, watching the wind blow through the golden rice paddies.
"You need to find a wife who treats you well in the future, understand?" Sister Yanzi said.
Lu Yueyuan lowered his head: "Will there be people like this again...? No, there won't be. I don't have the courage to part ways again."
“You need to act like a man. Don’t you always say you’re a man? Don’t let this kind of thing defeat you,” Sister Yanzi said. “Besides, there will be people who love you. Even if others don’t say it, Little Stone will love you. She likes you a lot, doesn’t she?”
“Little Stone…yes, right, Sister Yanzi, you can see it…I want her affection, but I also want yours. Do you really have to die…? If you keep going like this, I really won’t have the courage.” Lu Yueyuan said, “What if Little Stone also leaves me one day, Sister Yanzi? I can’t do it again…”
"You can't say you're afraid. This won't defeat you. You'll stand up bravely." Sister Yanzi kissed his forehead and cheeks again, and that's how she gave him strength.
"You'll grow stronger," Sister Yanzi nagdredged on. "If you don't choose Little Stone, that's okay. You'll definitely meet someone truly right for you. But no matter what, you have to take good care of yourself. Don't get yourself all hurt. I know you; you get really into adventures..."
She went on and on and on. So, this is her personality?
Lu Yueyuan only realized now that back when they went to the mountains, raided bird nests in the trees, and caught fish in the river, she never said much. She always did the cleanup work, like covering up their lies, treating their wounds, and clapping and laughing on the sidelines. Her smile was so powerful, which emboldened Lu Yueyuan. Even a mountain king needs a woman to fawn over him. What's that saying again? Men control the world, women control men to control the world. Lu Yueyuan felt like he was completely controlled by Sister Yanzi; when she was happy, he was happy; when she was sad, he was sad.
A man has many decisions to make, the most important of which is choosing which woman to spend his life with. At that time, Lu Yueyuan was still too young, but he chose Sister Yanzi. He felt that if he could grow old with Sister Yanzi and die by her side, it would definitely be a very romantic thing.
He thought this way, but the more he wanted something, the less likely he was to get it.
He had already discussed it with his parents and would be going to propose marriage in the coming days. He promised them that he would no longer wander around aimlessly; he would work hard in the fields, learn to read and write, and try to learn as many skills as possible, ideally even business. He wanted to buy a house, shop, or mill in a big town, and then take his parents and Sister Yanzi with him. He was full of ambition, believing he could achieve great things, but first and foremost, he needed Sister Yanzi's encouragement. Her kisses would give him strength, and he would have the courage to face all the difficulties ahead.
He told Sister Yanzi about it, saying that he actually didn't like farming; who would want to do such hard work? What he really loved was traveling, and when he had money, he wanted to see the world.
At that time, he would take Sister Yanzi with him. They definitely couldn't go to dangerous places; they would go to the most luxurious, beautiful, and awe-inspiring place in the world. Lu Yueyuan had even planned where he would live when he was old. He said it would definitely be by a lake, with crystal-clear water teeming with fish, and flower fields nearby. Every day he would fish there, and after fishing, he would leisurely stroll home, where he could see his beloved Sister Yanzi and the children. Sister Yanzi chuckled and said, "You're so precocious! You're so young, and you've already thought about where you'll die." Lu Yueyuan was too embarrassed to speak, but he thought to himself, "As long as I die with you, I don't care where I die."
Isn't that what love is all about? With love, even death isn't scary. But he never expected death to be even more wicked than he imagined. It targeted Sister Yanzi first. Lu Yueyuan really wanted to curse the entire family of death. Let him die first, that would be fine. He was a very selfish person to begin with. Let him die first. Sister Yanzi could miss him, that would be fine too. Why should Sister Yanzi die while he misses her? He's so young. Should he endure this kind of pain for the rest of his life?
"And... no matter who you marry in the future, you must never let her cry again. A real man will not let his woman shed tears," Sister Yanzi said.
"If you won't let her shed tears, are you going to let her die?" Lu Yueyuan cried again. "Why are you saying such cruel things to me?"
It's so cruel! He's supposed to find a wife who loves him, yet he's also supposed to avoid making that wife cry. Why should he do that?
Find someone who loves him, and then what? Can he still love again? Will he still have that thought, "I'd be willing to die with you"? The person who loves him in the future might be beautiful, might be gentle, but there will never be a woman like Sister Yanzi again. No matter how wonderful she is, she won't be Sister Yanzi. She can't climb mountains with him, climb trees with him, or go down to the river with him. She won't be there gently clapping and cheering, silently tending to his wounds. She won't gently kiss him, giving him strength.
Lu Yueyuan collapsed, covering his face and gasping for breath. It was a dream, after all; he couldn't hear his own heartbeat. He hated death more than he had ever felt now.
"Don't cry, if you cry, I'll cry too," Sister Yanzi said.
"I just want to cry! I can't say goodbye happily! I just want to cry! Is that any of your business?!" Lu Yueyuan roared.
You've disappeared from my life? Do you understand? From now on, you won't talk to me, you won't kiss me, you'll only exist in my memory.
From now on, you will be my deepest illusion... In the end, what is the meaning of this separation? What meaning can it have besides pain?! A bubble, a dream, like a reflection in a mirror or the moon's reflection in water. If you want to find me in the future, you can only do so in a dream, and even then, I can't be sure if the person in the dream is you. Separation is separation, and you will never come back. I can't keep you no matter what I do, you know? You are not just warmth and light to me anymore... but also countless pains.
"I don't care about you anymore, I can't control you anymore... You'll belong to another woman from now on." Sister Yanzi sobbed, "I'm in so much pain too, I don't want to be separated from you, but I can't help it, I'm dying..."
Lu Yueyuan finally felt his own heart, that heart torn in two, bleeding profusely—how cruel, how painful.
He wasn't the only one in despair; Sister Yanzi was too.
The wind stirs up dust everywhere, and by the edge of the field at sunset, a girl kisses a boy... Now, all of this exists only in the shadows of the past, swallowed up by death.
Crack! A crack appeared on the horizon; the hallucination was about to dissipate, and he was about to wake up.
"Sorry, I lost my composure. I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but I still cried, hehe..." Sister Yanzi tried to smile.
"I'm waking up...is that right...?" Lu Yueyuan looked at the sky in a panic. "Sister Yanzi, I like you..."
Afraid of rubbing, cracks appeared on Sister Yanzi's smile. Lu Yueyuan held Sister Yanzi tightly, but that feeling slowly faded. "Don't wake up, don't wake up," he told himself, but dreams eventually end.
Sister Yanzi reached out and touched Lu Yueyuan's face. She gazed at him for a long time, but finally, she let go. "You are my boy..." she murmured, tears streaming down her face. A smile played on her lips, her expression mirroring Lu Yueyuan's devastated state.
Lu Yueyuan suddenly opened his eyes. Thunder rumbled in the sky. He was lying in the mud, his legs almost numb with pain, and he was covered in wounds. He groaned softly in pain.
Voices echoed from the sky: "Damn it, the Nine Peaks Sect is here!" "Fengdu Ghost Palace, we'll fight to the death!" "Retreat! Retreat!"... Wails of agony. Could the heavens ever wail?
With his hands stuck in the mud, Lu Yueyuan struggled to his feet, panting. "Sister Yanzi, Sister Yanzi..." The hallucination he had just experienced was tearing at his nerves, but he could no longer see the wheat field; it was a vast expanse of white, with only the burning, scorched earth.
Amidst the deafening thunder, Lu Yueyuan screamed in despair, but no one responded.
It wasn't just scorched earth; there were also many severed limbs of corpses... sticky and clinging to the wheat field. In the wind and rain, they drifted along with the burning wheat field. The blood had turned black, and no one could tell them apart. Lu Yueyuan knew that his Sister Yanzi was among them.
Lu Yueyuan staggered forward, his body covered in wounds.
Blood and tears dripped down together, and his heart, torn apart by fear and sorrow, made him murmur, "Swallow..."
The wind blows across the wheat fields strewn with corpses, and the swallows fly south, never to return.
The swallows had always perched beside him, but when winter came, the swallows couldn't refuse. With tears in their eyes, they waved goodbye to Lu Yueyuan and flew south. They said they would come back, but only Lu Yueyuan knew that they would never return.
Lu Yueyuan walked towards the ruins and saw Little Stone huddled there, crying. He hugged her tightly. Little Stone trembled and burst into tears.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Little Stone cried.
He is the one who should apologize.
Amidst the roar of thunder, someone descended. Lu Yueyuan felt no fear. He suddenly thought, "Hey, I'm pretty brave too. Who cares who they are? It's just that I'm going to die anyway, so it's fine."
The two people who landed were Lu Yueyuan's future grandmaster and master. They both looked at the boy and girl embracing each other.
The grandmaster stepped forward first, looking down at them from his superior position.
"What do you want to do?" Lu Yueyuan asked.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Little Stone suddenly became agitated. "Take me away, please don't hurt him. My father and mother are dead, everyone is dead, please don't let him die too."
"I had no intention of harming you," the Grandmaster finally spoke, his voice gentle. "It's a pity you've encountered this."
"Whether it's revenge or repentance, it can't be done without power, so come with us."
Lu Yueyuan looked up. It was the first time he had seen his grandmaster. His grandmaster was a very young man, gentle and refined, giving people a feeling of warmth and comfort.
"Where to?" he asked.
A breeze blew by, and his wounds slowly healed.
"The Nine Peaks Sect will become your new home." The Grandmaster extended his hand.
With a whoosh, the enormous celestial ship descended from the sky, like a moving fortress. Lu Yueyuan and Little Stone arrived atop the fortress, where magic cleansed their bodies and healed their wounds. Looking out the window, Lu Yueyuan saw the celestial ship gradually ascend, the village slowly shrinking until it became a tiny, dark dot.
"I'm sorry..." Little Stone hugged himself on the back of the bed, still with tears streaming down his face. "It's my fault that everyone is in trouble."
Thunder roared, the sky howled, and the immortal ship faced the challenge head-on. Lu Yueyuan was in a daze and didn't hear what Little Stone was saying at all.
He just stood there, stunned, watching the burning village slowly disappear, his mind buzzing.
The wind blew like waves in the wheat field, ruffling my worn-out clothes.
Swallows, oh swallows, fly south, over the old riverbank.
Many poplar trees grow on the west side of the water, the wind whistles, and the scene is desolate.
The living bid farewell to the dead, and could only suppress their sobs, their tears soaking their clothes.
There are no inns on the road to the underworld; where will you rest tonight?
Lu Yueyuan slapped himself in the face.
He regretted it; why hadn't they parted properly when they should have? Maybe it wasn't a dream, but Sister Swallow's last words... But he didn't listen carefully; he was always thinking of praying, hoping for a miracle. So the swallow flew away, and he had no chance to say goodbye.
"I'm in so much pain too. I don't want to be separated from you, but I can't help it. I'm dying..."
Yes, she's already dead, but she still comes to my dream, forcing a smile. Isn't that because she can't bear to let go?
Beside the pile of mangled limbs, swaying in the wind like a field of wheat, swallows fly south, never to return.
Lu Yueyuan suddenly opened the door and ran out. He ran like a madman, the wind howling in his ears. He reached the bow of the immortal ship and jumped off. They were about to disappear! Sister Yanzi and everyone else were disappearing along with the village. He cried and struggled, but his grandmaster held him in his hand. He could only kick his legs in mid-air like a helpless little beast.
The grandmaster silently recited the Heart-Cleansing Mantra, and slowly closed his eyes, but this time, Sister Yanzi was not in his dream.
Jiuyi Sect.
For the disciples of the Nine Peaks Sect's lineage, today was an extraordinary day. First, the guardians mobilized en masse, and then the last guardian capable of inheriting the lineage was found. But that wasn't all; their master brought back a little brat, saying he was their new junior brother. After dumping him on them, their master ran off, either to drink heavily or to brothels in the mortal realm.
Is accepting disciples this hasty? Everyone looked at each other, puzzled. The eldest brother only knew how to cultivate, not how to care for children; the second sister always had an icy demeanor, making her even less suitable for contact; as for the third brother, he was a troublemaker—who knew what kind of person he'd turn the new junior brother into? The grandmaster had also sent word that their youngest junior brother had just experienced a painful ordeal, and they were to comfort him. How were they supposed to comfort him? Ultimately, this task fell to Shi Wanqing. As the fourth senior sister, she was quite excited because finally someone younger than her had arrived, and she could be a senior sister.
Everyone agreed that Shi Wanqing would take care of the boy, but she soon encountered her first problem: the boy was extremely withdrawn. She had never seen such a withdrawn child before; he wouldn't even eat dinner. When Shi Wanqing brought the food in, the boy was sitting on the bed, his face and lips as pale as ever. He was clearly starving, but he didn't speak. Shi Wanqing placed the food on the table, and he finally spoke his first words: "Where's Little Stone?"
"You mean the child who came with you?" Shi Wanqing said. "She's in Huai Zai Mai, but she's not Little Stone anymore. She's changed her name to Ming Huaiwei. She has the blood of the Dragon God flowing through her veins. That's her true home. You'll understand later."
Lu Yueyuan stopped speaking. Shi Wanqing could see clearly that the boy's back was gradually hunching over, and his eyes were as dark as an abyss, without a trace of light. He didn't speak again, but just sat there in silence.
It's understandable to become withdrawn after encountering something like that, but starving is unacceptable. Shi Wanqing sat down next to him with the food in her hands. "Come on, open your mouth..." she fed him spoonful by spoonful.
Then she saw tears welling up in the boy's eyes, gushing forth. He was squeezing himself so hard with his hands that he felt as if he wanted to tear a piece of his own flesh off. Shi Wanqing was an easily empathetic person, and she sadly said, "It's okay, no matter what, everything will pass." But those words seemed useless. She could clearly see the lonely and helpless roar emanating from the boy's soul.
Time: Now. Location: Fengdu Ghost Palace.
The bells rang continuously over Youzhou, and a pale mist shrouded the entire city. Beifeng, on Lu Yueyuan's advice, had already reorganized its counterattack against the Demonic Sect.
A thunderous boom echoed across the sky.
Lu Yueyuan suddenly opened his eyes and sat up in bed.
All around was darkness. Jealousy curled up beside him, sleeping peacefully. When did this guy climb up again? Lu Yueyuan shook his head. He had actually fallen asleep. How strange! After so many simulations, he rarely fell asleep naturally anymore. Moreover, he had many strange dreams. In his dreams, he returned to a long time ago, to the time when he parted ways with Sister Yanzi.
He couldn't say whether it was a hallucination or reality.
But it doesn't matter anymore. The long simulation has already confused his senses. He can't even remember anything about Sister Yanzi anymore. Now, the most urgent thing is to quickly prepare to support Qingzhou and fight Qing Zaishan.
Lu Yueyuan looked into the room inside, where Ao Man was cultivating. She was currently entering a state of enlightenment.
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