The Thirteen Trials of the Deceptive Monk

The fourth monster roared inwardly, but another male college student took off his clothes without hesitation upon hearing this!

"I shouldn't have underestimated the monsters; I was careless."

"But this seems to make it inconvenient to move around."

"It's alright, I've learned how to weave grass skirts from leaves before, just wait five minutes."

"Then I'll help collect the leaves too."

Two clean-cut and open-minded male college students started climbing the tree.

The fourth monster really wanted to gouge out his own eyes.

Don't you think it's a bit late to start thinking about remedial measures after you've already taken everything off?! If you have this kind of ability, couldn't you at least do the job before you're completely naked?!

"Very good, it's done."

"I made a pistol out of tree branches."

"Then let's go!"

Equipped with leaf skirts and short guns made of branches, the two warriors bravely stepped into the forest! Their open backs seemed to belong to noble and unyielding warriors from prehistoric times!

The fourth brother turned his head shakily: "Brother, why don't we let them live?"

"What are you saying, Fourth Brother? This has only just begun."

"These two seem crazy, bro. I feel like messing with them will get you into trouble..."

·

The forest was filled with the chirping of insects and the occasional rustling of small animals. Lü Wenjun, keeping track of the time, stopped at a fork in the road.

“The map provided by the tavern owner shows it’s a straight line from the entrance to the tavern, but we’ve already taken three forks in the road,” Vilsa said. “It’s been…”

“Thirteen minutes should have been enough to get close to the ‘Four Seasons Forest’ at the back, but it still looks like the outer perimeter,” said Lü Wenjun. “It’s really just going around in circles. Luckily, I was prepared.”

He had already clutched several pieces of jerky in his hand, and now he tore the jerky into pieces, throwing them behind him as he walked.

"Mark the way you came, and when you see the jerky, the cycle will be complete."

“It’s practical,” Vilsa said, “but it has one drawback.”

Lu Wenjun smiled: "I know. I've read 'Hansel and Gretel'..."

Shortly after the two walked away, a pair of cunning eyes popped out from the dense grass.

The third monster leaped out of the bushes, picked up the jerky, stuffed it into its mouth, and then immediately jumped back. Its speed was extremely agile; even when the two were right in front of it, they could only see a fleeting blue-green phantom.

Pebbles, ropes, markings on tree bark—he'd seen these tricks countless times, but relying on them to get out of the forest wouldn't be so easy. The third brother smacked his lips as he chewed on the jerky, thinking this stuff was fucking awful… He'd collect all the jerky in one go and toss it to the fourth brother.

It cautiously peeked out to make sure there were no ambushes around before attacking again to pick up the meat. However, this time, as it stood up after picking it up, it suddenly saw a ball of fire.

It was a truly captivating flame, drawing the third brother involuntarily towards it. Halfway there, the flame suddenly shattered, and everything went black.

Two mad cavemen are looking down at it.

"Aa ...

“Found you!” Lu Wenjun sneered.

Chapter 33 Let's talk this out, don't run away!

"So that's what kind of monster it is."

"How strange, they are completely different from the elves in my hometown."

The two crazy cavemen made a makeshift rope out of a few vines and tied the unfortunate monster to a tree.

This monster is less than a meter tall and has a particularly distinctive appearance. It looks like the head of an Easter Island statue that has been shrunk dozens of times and then filtered with a cute filter, paired with four short, thick limbs covered in blue-green fur.

“Even monsters can be so fat they don’t have necks…” Lu Wenjun pondered.

"Nonsense! I have a very well-proportioned figure, and the part that's tied up is my neck!" the third brother shouted to defend his reputation.

"Whose neck is below their arms and above their lips? That must be fat, because it's so fat that the face and body blend into one."

Vilsa nodded repeatedly: "In addition, years of lack of exercise have led to the degeneration of the limbs. That makes sense."

"No way! I was born this way! Stop using human standards to analyze monsters so seriously!"

Lu Wenjun squatted down and placed one hand on the third brother's head: "Then why don't you teach us what kind of monsters you are? And how do we get out of this forest?"

The third brother sneered: "You think I would—"

"Alright, this is a tough nut to crack. Let's get started!"

"You didn't even let me finish speaking!"

Lu Wenjun happily picked up the wooden gun and carved a horizontal line on the bark of the tree next to the third brother.

He waited quietly for five seconds, then drew a vertical line with his gun.

"What, what do you mean?"

"Wait a mininute……"

Another horizontal line, a vertical line, another horizontal line. Twenty-five seconds later, a tally mark appeared next to the third brother.

Lu Wenjun stood up and smiled, "From now on, every thirty seconds we will carve a tally mark next to you. If you still refuse to confess after two minutes, we will take a portrait of you as a favor and post it on the campus forum."

The third child screamed, "No! Aaaaaaah!"

In the distant grove, the fourth brother, who was in charge of observation, was trembling with fear: "They are too ruthless!"

The leader of the monsters remained relatively calm: "Don't worry! At worst, the third brother will make a few funny faces. In the end, they'll be the ones who embarrass themselves..."

"Can Third Brother really have such a strong mentality? I see him shaking."

Lu Wenjun carved another tally mark and said regretfully, "How many minutes has it been, Vilsa?"

Versa carefully counted two tally marks, then raised his hand to add two more, and said, "Two minutes have passed, it's time."

"Get there my ass! You weren't even planning to wait for me!" the third brother shouted hoarsely.

Lü Wenjun clicked his tongue in amazement: "Wow, it's time to post it so soon. This kid is a real tough guy. I'll keep an eye on it, Velsa, you take over."

The third brother struggled frantically: "Wait! We can talk! We can talk about anything you want to know!!"

"This is the first time I've ever used something like a 'forum'..."

After manipulating the device for a while, Velsa said, "[In the forest, we encountered some tough guys, and I went in with my friends.] How about that?"

"Keep it brief, everyone will understand." Lü Wenjun patted the third brother, "Brother Monster, adjust your expression, we're about to take a picture."

The third brother was taken aback: "Sorry, I've never taken 'photos' before, so I don't really know much about this..."

(Can you please not be so polite at a time like this?!) Even the second son couldn't hold back.

(Oh no, my third brother gets incredibly curious about things like civilization and technology!)

"It's okay, it's very simple. Just smile as brightly as possible, and then make a V sign with your hands."

Is that so?

"Very good, very good, that's settled then, cheese~"

Click, the photo of the jade pendant is complete.

Two crazy cavemen dressed only in grass skirts squatted on either side of a large tree, smiling broadly. The third one, covered in tally marks, was tied up in the middle of the tree, his face covered in dirt, making a V-sign with a very stiff smile.

"Aaaaaah! Aaaaaahhhhhh!!!" The third brother, who witnessed the layout of the photo, let out a scream comparable to that of a goblin.

Lü Wenjun nodded repeatedly: "Not bad, very artistic."

"Let's put this picture in the main post."

"Add one more sentence: 'Monster Extermination Live Report ~ Updated every fifteen minutes ~' Remember to add heart symbols before and after the text."

"It's done, now send it—"

The third brother screamed hoarsely, "Don't send it! I'll confess! I'll confess everything!!"

Lu Wenjun gestured for them to stop and said gently, "That's right, we're all good friends, why make things so awkward? I'll ask you one more time, what kind of monster are you? How do we get out of this forest?"

The third brother shouted as if confessing, "We are the four brothers from Laixi! I'll take you wherever you want to go!"

After some thought, Lü Wenjun found relevant records among the books he had read.

Leshii is a spirit/guardian of the forest from Russia. It is said that Leshii enjoys playing pranks and will deliberately lead travelers astray in the forest. Wearing clothes and shoes inside out can confuse Leshii and allow one to safely leave the forest.

but……

Lu Wenjun sneered: "You're still lying even now. You're not Lacey at all!"

The third brother stared wide-eyed, utterly shocked: "Then who am I?"

“In mythology, Lacey is often depicted as an old man who is half-human and half-plant. He can whip humans with branches, cause trees to explode, and even freely manipulate the land and forests. He is a well-known spirit in the area…” Lu Wenjun shook his head repeatedly. “But you can’t even break free from the branches, let alone manipulate trees. How can a monster like you be Lacey?”

The third brother hurriedly explained, "No, there are many kinds of Lacey, what you're talking about is the big Lacey! I'm just a regular Lacey!"

“Oh, so the same kind of monster has different levels of rarity? Do you think I would believe that?” Lu Wenjun sighed. “Besides, to solve the problem of getting lost in Lacey, you need to wear your clothes inside out, but we don’t even have any clothes on us yet you say you can lead us out. Don’t you think that’s contradictory?”

"You know what's going on? You two bastards aren't even wearing clothes anymore, what can we do?"

Versa agreed: "I'm afraid it's some kind of obese goblin."

"Hasn't this topic been resolved yet?!"

"He must want to take us to the goblin's lair and humiliate us there," Lü Wenjun said sadly.

"Who insulted whom, you bastard!"

Lu Wenjun gave him a wink: "I've never seen such a tough nut to crack before. I have no choice but to post it, Vilsa."

Versa nodded knowingly: "Okay, send in three seconds."

The third brother felt utterly trapped in the vastness of the world, with nowhere to escape. He looked up and cried out in anguish, "Big brother!! Save me!!!"

Three figures in blue and green leaped out of the jungle. The first two snatched the jade pendant from Vilsa, while the third one untied the vines with a single touch, released the third brother, and then turned and fled!

With a single wave of his hand, Vilsa shook off the other two Laceys, who then set off in different directions without lingering in the fight.

Lu Wenjun picked up the automatically untied vine and said curiously, "It really can control plants..."

Deep within the bushes, the third brother clung tightly to his eldest brother, nearly bursting into tears: "Big brother! Big brother!!"

"Hey, third brother, you should get down here now. You look a bit dirty..."

"Damn it, I think it's your heart!" the third brother shouted angrily.

"Big brother, let's retreat! These two lunatics are too ruthless; we can't handle them!" the second brother shouted from afar.

"Coward! Have you no shame?! Is it acceptable for Lacey to be played like this in the forest?!" the eldest brother scolded. "Even if you hide in the woods and those two can't find you, what can they do? They'll still have to obediently get lost and submit!"

The third brother was startled: "Big brother, what you said makes sense..."

The eldest brother, too lazy to waste words with him, picked up a leaf, played his flute, and sent a message: "Gather and count off, second brother!"

The second brother responded and arrived: "Here!"

"Fourth!"

"Here!" Lü Wenjun said. "Where's the fifth brother?"

“The fifth one is with him,” Velsa said, raising his hand.

The leader nearly twisted his neck: "What the hell?! Why did you guys chase after us too?!"

The two cavemen moved with incredible speed, like two frenzied pythons chasing after the Lacey brothers. The thinner caveman was carrying the unfortunate fourth brother in his arms, his large, green face filled with sorrow.

"Big brother—save me—"

"How the hell did that bastard catch up with us?"

Lu Wenjun pointed to the ground: "Look at the footprints."

Versa remained unfazed: "By the scent!"

The leader of the Lacey gang stared wide-eyed at the footprints, which were barely more than fallen leaves: "You guys can find such a tiny trace?! Are you bears?!"

"Brother, don't let me get dragged down with you, put me down!" the third brother said sadly.

"No need for a life-or-death separation, I'm going to write four tally marks for each of you four brothers!" Lü Wenjun sneered.

Virsa held up the jade pendant: "Does everyone have their picture taken too?"