My name is Levi, and I work in anime.

"It all started when you were dozing off while hugging your long-haired black-haired shrine maiden." The white-haired sow grinned maliciously. "Li Wei, you've been lazy! It's so great, so incredibly great! The feeling of being pinned down and fucked by a beautiful young man is just too good! What will I do if I don't have this anymore? I'm going to capture you and replenish your mana every day!"

That expression... anyone who didn't know better might think Li Wei had smeared ice on his Noble Phantasm.

The boy tried to struggle, but was surprised to find that his strength was like a mud ox sinking into the sea, completely unusable.

"Give up! Guess what you've been dreaming about all this time since I haven't eaten? Of course, you've been working on this spatial artifact to target Levi!" Sister Meryl smiled like a fox that had just eaten chicken—and in fact, she had: "Here, my authority is limitless. You'll just have to be my servant!"

"Why would you do this?" Li Wei asked, somewhat puzzled. "Even though I often beat you up, if you talk to me properly and don't do any of that nonsense, I'd still seriously consider talking to you, right?"

Regardless, Sister Meryl helped me a lot, and she is indeed very good-looking, so how did I end up on this path of no return?

"..."

When this topic was brought up, the white-haired sow fell silent.

After a long while, she looked at Li Wei with a completely insane gaze, her eyes filled with utter despair: "You know your angel Icarus, right?"

"Of course I know, what does this have to do with Icarus?"

"After being bombarded to the point of being reduced to 114514 pieces by the Queen of the Sky System, I briefly hacked into the system and saw the endings of some world lines."

“…So what?” Li Wei had a slight idea of ​​what was going on.

"In the observable world lines, the number of world lines where you are married is 0."

"..."

"Originally, there was Hiratsuka Shizuka who shared my fate, but now she also has a winning timeline!"

"..."

"This isn't the future I want! Let's rewrite it!" Sister Meryl conjured a wedding dress and put it on. "It's decided! We're getting married right now. We have to rewrite this future where my chances of winning are zero!"

"Hey, hey, hey, don't be impulsive!" Li Wei panicked slightly.

If the previous Meryl was still manageable to communicate with, the current Meryl has completely fallen into a state of fanaticism and is impossible to get along with.

"Sister Meryl, calm down, calm down!"

"How can you expect me to calm down? I can't accept this!"

"Twisted melons are not sweet."

"But it quenches thirst, and I prefer the non-sweet kind."

The white-haired sow snapped her fingers, and the surroundings instantly transformed into a wedding scene. Li Wei was now dressed in a groom's suit: "Come on, Li Wei's first marriage partner, I'll accept you~"

At this moment, Li Wei is facing his greatest crisis!

Volume 6: Chapter 44 The mantis stalks the cicada, unaware of the oriole behind.

"No, my first marriage partner must be Ryougi!"

Li Wei struggled desperately, but in this completely controlled dream, it was all in vain.

It even had the opposite effect—the more he struggled, the happier Sister Zamelie became. A kind of yellow-haired pleasure welled up in her heart, and she was so excited that she almost pierced her own temples with her fingers.

"Suffer, beg, struggle, and then, get married~"

Reciting lines from a red-haired man she'd seen at Mr. Ryu's dojo, Mary was now smug and bursting with chuunibyou: "From this day forward, for all eternity, it will be remembered that Li Wei's first marriage partner in the main world was me, Mary!"

With another snap of the fingers, countless alchemical dolls appeared out of thin air, each dressed as a guest and master of ceremonies, playing the roles of guests and friends.

Judging from its appearance, the skin is incredibly smooth, and the facial features are exquisitely sculpted and captivating. It's so lifelike that it seems to come alive when you breathe on it. It's clearly the work of a master craftsman and absolutely realistic.

That said, the craftsmanship of these dolls looks very familiar.

"I've been preparing for this grand wedding for a very, very long time!" Sister Mei said with a touch of heartache, "All the money I had saved up is gone, a full 350 kilograms of gold and 234 billion quantum dollars!"

"You make it sound so nice, are we some strange, ill-fated couple?"

"In short, although the wedding was very expensive, the results were really good, and my sister is very satisfied."

"It's just the two of us, what's there to be satisfied or not?" Li Wei said helplessly. "Besides, even if it were a real wedding, not many people would care about these things. They just want the food to be served quickly, the banquet to begin, and then they can go home after eating."

"Don't worry about the details, let's begin the wedding now."

Sister Meryl snapped her fingers happily again, looking expectantly at the master of ceremonies puppet. However, after a while, the puppet did not begin to preside over the wedding as she had expected. Instead, it stood there motionless, as if it were mocking the white-haired sow.

"Wha...what happened? Is it broken?" Sister Meryl looked extremely annoyed: "I spent a lot of money, this grand wedding can't be ruined."

"You're right, we really can't afford to mess up such a grand wedding."

Just before the infatuated magician was about to go and inspect it, the emcee puppet's mouth moved and uttered these words.

However, the tone was not friendly; it sounded more like someone trying to cause trouble.

The point isn't just the description; the point is that the emcee's appearance and demeanor—the puppet being female—easily reminded Li Wei of a red-haired older sister he knew well, coincidentally, she was also a puppeteer.

Could it be that the buyer Sister Meryl found is...?

"Hehe, young man, I didn't expect you to be in such a sorry state after so long." The doll took off her mask, revealing dazzling long red hair, and greeted Li Wei on her own: "But you deserve it, you have to bear the consequences of the romantic troubles you caused with girls."

As she spoke, the older sister naturally tied her long red hair into a high ponytail and put on gold-rimmed glasses, which concealed her sharp gaze while also bringing a touch of intellectual beauty.

"Sister Orange, it really is you." Li Wei's heart was finally at ease.

Aozaki Touko, an old acquaintance of Levi, is a top-notch doll maker and a woman as crazy as Scáthach.

I apologize for speaking ill of others behind their backs like this, but she is indeed a crazy woman. Even the director of Arkham Asylum, who came to St. Juliana Hospital for academic exchange some time ago, said that we do not accept this kind of person.

As for how she and Li Wei met, that's another story. At least for now, Sister Orange is definitely the savior who can rescue her from Meryl's clutches!

"Young man, don't worry, I will take good care of you."

Li Wei: "..." Why am I suddenly not so relieved? Is it just my imagination?

"You, are you here to stop me from finding happiness too?" Sister Mei quickly figured out the situation and questioned sharply, "Haven't you heard that people who interfere with someone's marriage will be kicked to death by a horse?"

"What does it matter? You're not human." This is a very good and powerful answer; no one can find a problem with it.

“We signed a contract; all ownership of these dolls belongs to me…”

"Hehe, then take a look at what the signature says?"

Sister Meili took out the contract, on which were written several large, flamboyant characters: Party A's signature: Crimson of Pain.

What does your search for the Scarlet Wound have to do with me, Aozaki Touko?

"And don't pretend to be a victim." The official Weibo account mocked, "The final payment you made was all stolen goods. It would be very troublesome to launder them and use them, so their actual value does not match the amount due. Therefore, the contract is invalid."

As someone who once deceived Romani, it's truly a cause for celebration that I've finally been betrayed.

"Hehehe..." Upon hearing Aozaki Touko's reply, Merry's eyes instantly dimmed.

The laughter sent a chill down Li Wei's spine; it was eight parts similar to Morgan's laughter at their engagement ceremony.

"No matter what, this wedding must go on; it cannot end."

“I agree with you.” Aozaki Touko nodded. “However, there is one thing that needs to be changed: the bride should be me, not you, you white-haired sow.”

Without exchanging a single word, the two sides clashed immediately. The puppets, who had been sitting in their seats as guests, suddenly switched into battle mode and launched an attack on Sister Meryl.

Caught off guard, the white-haired sow was instantly roasted like a charcoal-grilled sow, ready to be served after a sprinkle of scallions.

"Hehe, very good. It seems that the irrelevant people have left the stage. Now it's time for us to enjoy some pleasant time together." Aozaki Touko smiled as she looked at her spoils—beautiful women have always been meant for the strong, and now it's time to take her home and get married.

Poor Mary, she deposited money year after year, only to have it all go to someone else.

Just as she was happily preparing to receive the award, a long spear came from behind and instantly tore the doll to pieces.

Li Wei was extremely familiar with this spear; its owner had trained him countless times day and night, almost pushing him to his death.

"Sister Scáthach, when did you arrive?"

"If you don't come soon, you'll have to sit at the family table, so of course you have to get here on time." Looking around at the surroundings, the Shadow Queen seemed quite satisfied: "A wedding, huh? That suits your flirting-with-girls personality perfectly."

"Sister Scáthach, please don't laugh at me."

"I wasn't mocking you." The purple-haired queen smiled knowingly. "You're about to become a prince of the Shadow Kingdom. Aren't you happy?"

I'm so happy!

Volume 6: Chapter 45 A woman three thousand years older than a man can marry a man of great wealth.

"Come on, come on, don't be so shy. You weren't like this in bed before~"

"This has nothing to do with being shy; that's not what I meant."

"Alright, alright, stop being so arrogant. Arrogant boys aren't cute at all."

"I'm really not being arrogant, really!"

This conversation seems strangely familiar. It's as if I had a similar conversation with a certain older, marriage-hungry female teacher when I was still in kindergarten, but that's not the point.

The powerless boy is being dragged to the center of the dance floor by his teacher as if he were a trophy, to continue his unfinished business—the wedding ceremony.

The only thing missing is that Orange, who was supposed to be the emcee, was just ruined by Scáthach-sensei, so we're short of someone.

"So let's just forget about this incomplete wedding and talk about it another time?" Li Wei still held onto a sliver of hope.

Sixteen years old? Not even an adult yet, not even old enough to legally get married. Scáthach, aren't you afraid the police will come knocking on your door?

It seems I'm the cop in charge of managing the people in the inner world, so it's alright then.

"Isn't it just a matter of needing a master of ceremonies? Those from the last engagement ceremony seemed pretty good, let's ask them again." The Shadow Queen snapped her fingers enthusiastically, and a summoning circle flashing with runes appeared on the ground. Immediately afterwards, three figures that Li Wei recognized very well appeared in front of the boy.

They are: Romani wearing a magical girl outfit and hugging a life-sized body pillow; Oberon holding a small cake and seemingly eating and drinking for free; and Sakata Gintoki wearing a yukata and probably drinking brothels.

The three of you really have amazing skills.

"Merry-chan, Merry-chan is so amazing~"

Li Wei: "Doctor, didn't I tell you last time that Magical Girl Merry-chan is a man? Why are you still giving him tips?"

"But I saw her dressed as a girl, she was so cute..." Romani smiled awkwardly, "Don't worry about the details, as long as there's love, that's enough~"

Oberon: "Bullshit, he's just continuing to exploit you like a sucker, isn't he?"

"He's different this time! He's different this time!"

Gintoki: "This guy is completely hopeless."

The three reached a rare consensus on the matter of Romani.

Okay, setting aside those details, Li Wei quickly explained what was happening and Scáthach's purpose in bringing the three of them over.

"Isn't this wrong?" The doctor with a strong sense of justice was the first to jump out and object: "How can such an important matter as marriage be treated so lightly? Don't worry, Avi, although I haven't taken action in a long time, I can still handle Scáthach."

After speaking, he showed off the ten rings on his hand. The ten rings, symbolizing power, shone with a reassuring light for Li Wei.

As expected of a doctor, her character is as reassuring as ever. I would have been even more touched and at ease if there hadn't been a sticker of Merry on the Ten Commandments.

Oberon: "What I hate most is being forced. I'll help you this time. With my buff, Romani will be able to cut down Scáthach as easily as dropping a signboard."

That's great! There's nothing to be afraid of anymore. Scáthach-sensei is still so sweet. This is the essence of male friendship!

After discussing their plan with confidence, the group, led by Romani, prepared to reason with the purple-haired older sister. However, before the doctor could speak, Scáthach snapped her fingers again, and another furry older sister appeared before them.

“Oh, right, I just remembered something.” Scáthach introduced with a smile, “This is my close friend, the Queen of Sheba, whom I met recently. She’s attending this wedding as an important guest.”

"Yo~ Long time no see, Romeni, I've missed you so much~"

"Aa ...

"Romani, do your job as emcee well. Scáthach said she'll give us a travel package to the whole world after the event."

"Help..." The doctor wanted to say something, but his words were cut off by the older sister's warm softness. No matter how much he struggled, it was useless. Before long, he could no longer move, his arm hung limply at his sides, and he lost consciousness.

Romani, you bastard.

"As expected, a real man shouldn't be too tied down by women. Romani is a prime example." Sakata Gintoki sighed. "How wonderful it would be to go to Yoshigen every day to drink and have fun, just like me. It would be so carefree and happy."

"Gintoki, you're strolling through the brothel again." Behind him, a woman named Tsukuyomi spoke coldly: "Looks like I'll have to teach you a lesson."

"There are other people here, don't hang me up!"

Sakata Gintoki, you've fallen.

“This is the harm of drugs, gambling, and prostitution. I’m much better off; I’m clean-living and have no weaknesses.” Oberon said in a relaxed tone, “Do you understand the saying, ‘The ocean is vast because it embraces all rivers, and a towering cliff is strong because it is free from desires’?”

To think that I, a fine man like Oberon, would be ranked alongside such a good-for-nothing.