I'm in Teresin, dedicated to playing badly

"if not?"

Shinji Kitahara countered with a question, and then spoke.

"And it's not just this one thing. In fact, my dissatisfaction with your behavior started with the first store."

"Let me give you an example. You mentioned before that when your parents were in their hometown, they borrowed a lot of money to support your schooling and were depressed about it for a time. You know about this."

"But let me suppose that after this happened, your parents chose to hide the truth from you because they were worried that you would feel guilty about it. They put on a brave face in front of you every day, and only grieve alone in private. Then they sent you to Treson, who knew nothing about the real situation."

Do you think this kind of development is good? Especially compared to your current situation.

"Of course it's not good."

The Tamamo Cross was immediately rejected.

"Then why not? They're clearly doing this for your own good, not wanting you to worry."

"You should have let me know."

Tamamo said earnestly.

“I know I was young then and probably couldn’t do much in dealing with this kind of thing, but at least if I knew the truth, I would be more frugal in my daily life and wouldn’t ask them for more.”

"Perhaps my actions won't have much effect, but at least, knowing the truth, as a family member, I can offer some help when the family faces difficulties and share these burdens with them."

Shinji Kitahara nodded and continued asking.

"If they actually did that, would you be angry?"

"Definitely."

Tamamo nodded decisively.

"How could you hide something like this and suffer alone? What do you take me for...?"

"In that case, I have some questions I'd like to ask."

Kitahara Shinji suddenly spoke up, interrupting Tamamo Cross's words.

"Since you believe that family members shouldn't hide things from each other when facing difficulties, and you've said that you consider me family, then why are you hiding things from me?"

"......ah?"

Tamamo-no-Mae was taken aback for a moment, then answered instinctively.

"Um, I didn't hide anything from you, Trainer Kitahara..."

"really?"

Shinji Kitahara glanced at her, then stood up, walked to Tamamo Cross, and took the list from her pocket.

"Then can you explain why you threw away this piece of paper this afternoon? And then you came over to greet me as if nothing had happened, and even considered giving up on going back to the academy..."

Faced with Shinji Kitahara's questioning, Tamamo Cross remained silent for a while.

"This is because..."

"Why?"

As he spoke, Shinji Kitahara unfolded the paper and displayed it in front of her.

“I haven’t done anything related to this, but just by looking at the text and information here, I can guess that you must have done a lot of research and preparation before you came. I also remember how happy you were when you left.”

"But back then, you gave up so easily, and even after giving up, you greeted me with that nonchalant expression, saying you were going back to the academy..."

"Furthermore, not only this time, but also in the past, although I didn't say it, I did notice that you had to go through a lot of procedures because of your studies and part-time jobs, many of which were off-campus."

"It's already difficult to manage on your own, let alone when you have to juggle studies, training, and part-time work. Asking someone else for help and companionship is the best option."

"But you gritted your teeth and squeezed in the time, running the whole thing all by yourself. You didn't even tell the rest of the team, let alone me..."

"And then there was that time when your grades dropped because of your part-time job, and you ended up catching up on your own by working a private job. But the problem is, you could have easily asked someone else to tutor you, and you even tutored Oguri Hat yourself just recently..."

"And there was that even earlier time..."

Shinji Kitahara talked about similar things for almost ten minutes before finally stopping, and it seemed he hadn't finished.

Opposite him, Tamamo Cross, who had initially tried to refute him when he first started speaking, now had her head completely lowered and her ears drooping limply.

Seeing her like this, after speaking, Kitahara Shinji sighed, squatted down, looked at the Tamamo Cross in front of him, and his tone gradually softened.

"Tamamo, I know you're a good girl, and I didn't mean to blame you for what you just said."

“I know that Tamamo has her own principles and bottom line, and I choose to respect that. So even though I noticed your actions before, I did not forcibly interfere.”

“But as I said before, I also consider you, Tamamo, to be family. And if we look at these issues from a family perspective, I would prefer that you, Tamamo, not be so ‘sensible’.”

"You're always giving, always thinking of others, always taking care of others, yet you remain silent about your own problems while helping others..."

"In my opinion, this is also a kind of selfishness, and it is an excessive selfishness that is only towards family and friends."

As he spoke, he reached out and brushed aside the hair hanging down from Tamamo Cross, tilted his head back, looked directly into her eyes, and said sincerely.

“I am right here, right beside you. I am willing to share your sadness and face your difficulties with you, just as you are willing to share my sadness and face my difficulties with me.”

"Isn't this how family should be?"

Chapter 258: Family

This is what a family should be like.

After saying this, Shinji Kitahara didn't say anything more to Tamamo Cross. After a brief eye contact, he reached out and patted her head before getting up and sitting back down in his chair.

Because he knew that Tamamo Cross could definitely figure these things out, and she didn't need any preaching right now; instead, she probably needed some quiet time alone.

In the end, Tamamo Cross didn't do anything wrong; in fact, he was quite outstanding. He just wanted her to consider him more, which is why he couldn't help but say those things.

After sitting back on the sofa, due to the previous mental and physical exertion, coupled with the mental relaxation, although Shinji Kitahara originally only wanted to take a nap, his breathing became long and deep as he dozed off.

Meanwhile, Tamamo Cross sat on the bed with her head down and her hands in front of her, seemingly deep in thought.

Family...

Recalling Kitahara Shinji's words, Tamamo lightly rubbed the buttons in her pocket with her cross fingers. A shadow covered her face under her hair, making it impossible to see her specific expression.

To be honest, she felt really sad when she threw the crumpled paper away in front of the first shop.

After all, no matter who it is, it would be hard to feel good to have something that has been carefully prepared for so long rejected so easily.

She didn't intentionally hide her emotions from Kitahara Shinji; it's just that over the years, because of her background, she had long been used to facing everything alone, so she did it subconsciously.

She knew that Shinji Kitahara wouldn't actually blame her for these things, but as he said, he considered her family.

If you put yourself in her shoes, if Shinji Kitahara encountered something that she could help with, especially something related to her, but chose not to tell her because he was worried about her, or even pretended that nothing was wrong, she would definitely feel bad, or even angry.

Therefore, she didn't think there was anything wrong with what Kitahara Shinji said, and she could also recognize his care and concern for her.

Logically speaking, once you've figured all this out, you shouldn't need to worry about the Tamamo Cross anymore.

After all, this was just Shinji Kitahara showing her concern, and she hadn't done anything wrong. She just needed to be more honest with him in the future.

Moreover, in this way, if she encounters any difficulties in the future, she won't have to bear them alone. Instead, she will have a trustworthy 'family member'. Logically speaking, she should be happy at this time.

However, although the principle was very clear, after thinking it through, a few small details that had been previously overlooked slowly emerged from her mind and were placed before her.

Why didn't she dare to hold Shinji Kitahara's hand at the first store?

Does she dislike Shinji Kitahara? That's clearly impossible.

If she truly disliked Shinji Kitahara, she wouldn't have chosen to join his team, much less treat him as family.

But if she didn't dislike it, then why did she choose to give up entering the store at that time instead of holding hands with Shinji Kitahara and pretending to be a couple to go in?

Or was it really 'unwilling'?

Aside from that time when they held hands, upon closer reflection, her to-do list planning was also quite problematic.

After all, store events can't be planned and announced on the same day; there has to be advance preparation and notice.

Although most shops did not announce the details of the various events in advance for various reasons, they only gave some previews. Most trainers and horse girls who went there were unaware of this until they arrived and realized that something was wrong.

The problem is that Tamamo Cross had started investigating and planning long in advance, and he had visited not just one or two places, but almost the entire area around Tressen.

Some shops posted the event posters a day in advance to save time, while the rest of the shops also provided advance notice in various ways. Logically, she should have already figured out the event details and requirements.

But it wasn't until the two arrived at the store and looked up at the poster that she realized something was wrong with the event requirements.

Was it a genuine oversight? Or was it intentional? Or perhaps she actually knew but 'accidentally' forgot?

For some reason, whenever she thought about these issues, Tamamo Cross would subconsciously ignore them until she was provoked by Kitahara Shinji's words and finally began to realize them.

What's even stranger is that these issues all seem to be trivial details.

But whenever Tamamo Cross begins to seriously consider these things, she always feels a heavy feeling in her chest, as if something is pressing down on it, making it difficult for her to breathe.

No, something's not right. She should...

As she pondered, Tamamo Cross felt her consciousness begin to blur, and then instinctively raised her head to look at Kitahara Shinji.

Originally, the reason why Tamamo looked at Kitahara Shinji was because she instinctively felt that the most crucial clue to finding the answer to these questions should lie with Kitahara Shinji.

But after looking up at Kitahara Shinji, and especially after seeing his current appearance, Tamamo Cross was stunned.

Mr. Kitahara... is he glowing?

Right in front of her, Shinji Kitahara sat on the sofa, his eyes closed and his breathing deep and slow, seemingly fast asleep.

The problem wasn't whether he slept well or not, but that after he fell asleep, as his consciousness relaxed, tiny spots of light began to appear around him and then started to radiate outwards.

Some of the more solid ones circled around him, gradually forming streaks of light, while others were ethereal and scattered, like mist enveloping him, as if veiling him in a thin veil.

Tamamo blinked, and after confirming that she wasn't seeing things, she pinched herself hard, almost crying out in pain, before finally realizing that it wasn't a hallucination.

It was at this moment, as she observed those flowing lights, that Tamamo Cross's consciousness gradually cleared, and the oppressive feeling in her heart gradually subsided.

She remembered that the reason she didn't hold Kitahara Shinji's hand was because she was worried that Kitahara Shinji wouldn't like this kind of thing, so she immediately let go after touching him.

As for not noticing the activity requirements, it was because her attention was entirely focused on the rewards and planning, so she coincidentally overlooked those requirements.

Yes, that's it, that must be it.

After figuring these things out, Tamamo Cross's eyes cleared again, and she seemed to be in a much better mood.

After her mood improved, looking at the halo surrounding Kitahara Shinji, although she didn't know what was going on, Tamamo Cross thought for a moment and decided not to wake him up since he was sleeping soundly.

Record it on your phone first, otherwise it'll be troublesome if he doesn't believe you later...

Thinking this, Tamamo Cross took out her phone and tried to record Kitahara Shinji's current appearance.

Strangely, after she started recording, she was surprised to find that the flowing light around Shinji Kitahara could not be captured by the camera lens.

Just like the 'territory' that those female horses display on the racetrack.

After fiddling around for a while and confirming that it was impossible to record anything, Tamamo Cross had no choice but to put away her phone and then began to observe Kitahara Shinji's current appearance, trying to record these things with her eyes.

But after observing for a while, Tamamo Cross's expression changed slightly.

Sleeping like that must be uncomfortable, right?

Seeing Kitahara Shinji sleeping in the chair, Tamamo Juji thought for a moment, then got up, quietly walked over, and reached out to pick him up from the chair.

Although carrying a big man is a difficult thing for the average woman, Tamamo Cross is a horse girl after all, and even a horse girl with less strength can easily carry someone.

During the process of picking up Shinji Kitahara, it was possible that Tamamo's cross-shaped movements were too large, or that Shinji Kitahara was more alert.

As he was being picked up, Kitahara Shinji seemed to regain consciousness for a moment, opening his eyes a crack to glance around, but quickly closing them again after seeing that the person touching him was Tamamo Juji, and his breathing became long and deep once more.

And so, Tamamo Cross carried Kitahara Shinji to the bed, and looking at him lying there, another idea came to her.

Is it really appropriate to sleep in your clothes?

Thinking this, Tamamo Cross reached out to Kitahara Shinji's collar and began to unbutton his shirt.

As for whether this behavior is inappropriate?

Tamamo Cross didn't think there was anything wrong with it.

After all, he just said that they are family, so what's wrong with family members helping each other unbutton a button?

However, even though that's what she thought, her hand suddenly stopped when she was halfway through solving the Tamamo Cross.

Don't get me wrong, it's not that she realized anything, it's just that when she was halfway through unpacking, she suddenly realized that the room seemed a bit cold, and if she took off his clothes like this, he might catch a cold.

That won't do; we need to find something warm...

Thinking this, Tamamo Cross looked around, her gaze automatically skipping over the air conditioner on the roof, and finally, when she couldn't find anything warm, she gradually focused her attention on her hands.