MyGO!!! I am the succubus Xiaoxiang?

Is it Xiangzi?

She swallowed hard. If it was Xiangzi's call, she couldn't show her weakness and couldn't make Xiangzi worry.

Although, although I know my thinking is wrong.

but.

Xiangzi, isn't he a bit too amazing?

For Xiangzi, who was too powerful, it was truly a sad thing.

The more capable and dazzling she is, the more one understands her goodness, the more one's own inadequacy is revealed.

What makes me think I deserve to be by their side?

The more dazzling she is, the darker her own shadow becomes.

Even if it's just my imagination, even if it's just a possibility, the thought that I, so fragile, am considered unworthy to be by her side is painful to even contemplate.

I swallowed hard, feeling like my saliva was being cut by a knife, adjusted my voice, and turned on my phone.

"Miss Hatsuka, as an idol, you must protect the dreams of children!"

However, the information did not come from Xiangzi, or rather, the information that was deliberately being promoted was not from Xiangzi.

Xiangzi and everyone else in the group chat comforted themselves and told themselves to rest.

They acted as if nothing had happened and that they hadn't said they were coming.

However, the company required him to continue working.

The girls who came to sign up for the classes were all young women who dreamed of becoming idols, and as an idol, one cannot let down one's little fans.

Saying things that no one believes

She demands so much of herself, even though she could have been called Mana.

That's how society is; it makes it impossible for you to live, yet it also makes it impossible for you to die.

I don't want to go crazy, but I also don't want to feel good.

My overheated brain is racing, thinking all sorts of random things, and I can't stop. Just when I want to stop...

The brain, instead, questions itself.

Did I say something inappropriate during our chat yesterday? Did I upset Xiangzi?

That's just how you are; you're always making others sad.

I struggled to change my clothes and get ready. Although I was very reluctant to go to work, that's just how reality is, isn't it? There are some things that we know we shouldn't do, but we still have to do them.

I changed my shoes at the entrance.

Before standing up and leaving the house, he said this subconsciously.

"I'm going."

I waited a moment as usual before going out.

Hearing the message "Have a safe journey."

Looking at the still-open door, I immediately realized it was the couple next door talking.

"What were you expecting?"

It seems like someone is asking themselves this question.

I had no expectations.

Chu Hua thought to herself.

What kills people is never setbacks, but expectations.

If you don't think about it, you won't get hurt.

I get up late every day, still half asleep, and am dragged to the table to eat breakfast. I eat whatever I can find before heading out to school, thinking I can play with my friends for a bit while I go to school, so I run off in a hurry.

A hurried voice came from behind.

"Eggs, darling, eggs are good for your health."

"Bring the milk."

"Schoolbag, schoolbag!"

"Shoes, put your shoes on properly."

Sometimes, it's about listening.

"Count to three, get up!"

"Go to school!"

"Don't pretend to be asleep!"

Or she might go to school crying while carrying her homework.

When they arrived at the school gate, they turned around and watched their parents leave. Some of the more vulnerable ones, the younger ones, tugged at their mothers' clothes, saying that they must come to pick them up as soon as possible.

"Okay, Mom will pick you up as soon as I get off work! Be good at school!"

Chu Hua stood to the side, watching the students come in one by one.

I've been watching all along.

You can see a mother with her child nearby, affectionately touching the child as she takes them to school. The child waves goodbye to their mother and then turns to show off to their classmates how pretty their mother is.

In the already dull and monotonous school life, anything can become a topic of conversation and a source of pride for everyone: parents, pencil cases.

At that time, the most direct way I could tell whether my mother loved me was by whether she would buy me the same things as everyone else.

Pencil cases, all kinds of pencil cases, mechanical pencils, even erasable pens, or new maze rulers, or random spinning pens, detachable pens.

When I take it out, everyone always gathers around. My mom bought it for me! She looks so proud.

Chu Hua never paid attention to this and didn't write it down at all.

I haven't seen the same pen on the second row of stationery stores on the street many times.

I don't even remember how the child cheered and ran over to hug his mother.

If you don't expect anything, you won't get hurt.

This remains true even now.

However, perhaps because of her illness, Chu Hua remembered many, many things that she thought she had forgotten.

Those memories of youth that others find worth cherishing, or all sorts of little things that have been forgotten, resurface again and again in Chuhua's most vulnerable moments, surging up with sadness.

In contrast to a room for one person, a house for one person, and a life for one person.

Loneliness from childhood to adulthood.

Parents-teacher conferences where no one attends regardless of whether the grades are good or bad, or so-called gratitude education sessions where no one can be called, while the lecturer shouts loudly about how much your parents have done for you, and you sit there all alone.

I was surrounded by everyone, being told how wonderful it was, with no one urging me to go home. Then I watched as my friends were taken home by their parents, leaving me alone, listening to their laughter.

How much time have you spent being waited for or urged by others?

Ha, Xiangzi is waiting for me, seeing my displeasure every day when I'm late.

. . . . . .

At lunchtime, the children lined up to heat up their lunchboxes. After they finished heating them up and gathered in groups of three or five, the teacher intervened to stop them from making a ruckus.

Who ate what whose parents prepared, who showed off too much and got their food stolen, or who knocked over their lunchbox.

Only when everyone was quietly eating could Chu Hua lean against the corner and eat the rice ball she had bought on her way downstairs.

Why is it that I was like this when I was a child, and I'm still like this now that I'm an adult?

Have I wasted my life growing up?

Chu Hua munched on her rice ball, looking at the exquisite bento boxes in the children's hands.

I'm off work, let's go get something good to eat.

Having said that.

However, Chu Hua still had to work overtime.

After all, the original agreement was for the two of them to come to the school as teachers for a week, an act of idols getting closer to real life.

However, there was only one person, with all sorts of things, assigned tasks, and arrangements.

Chu Hua stayed up until evening, spending time with a few students whose parents were working late, all alone at the school.

Being with children who are similar to yourself, and the fact that they are similar to you, is inherently a very happy thing.

It's not that I'm lonely; there are many people like me.

I am everyone's teacher, the oldest among us.

So, for no apparent reason, Chu Hua was unusually calm, comforting the children and telling them all sorts of jokes and happy stories.

just.

The jokes were told to Xiangzi by himself, and the happy things were created by him every day after school or during holidays when he was alone in his room, thinking about what he would say to Xiangzi the next day.

In his own memory, there was only Xiangzi pulling him and the world along.

just.

Ultimately, there is only one truly lonely person.

"goodbye teacher!"

The last child waved goodbye to himself.

They all have their own place to belong, and their own homes.

Only.

I don't have it myself.

The teachers who stayed behind accepted the meals brought by their husbands or wives, while the single teachers nudged each other, asking what they were going to buy, and also clamoring that they wanted to go back home and have their mothers cook them a nice meal when they had a holiday.

Chu Hua slumped in her seat.

"Miss Chuhua, Miss Chuhua?"

"Sorry, I'll go buy the bento myself later. You guys can go by yourselves."

"No, someone is looking for you."

"Eh?"

Looking up blankly, the girl at the door waved her hand and casually raised the other one.

"Chuhua, are you alright?"

“Saki?”

. . . . . .

As the lid rotates, a wave of heat and aroma wafts out.

The aroma of fish blends with the slightly cooled, fishy smell.

"I got a white crucian carp to make soup. Chuhua, didn't you say you had a cold? Crucian carp is sweet and neutral in nature, nourishing without being drying, strengthening the spleen and removing dampness, and it is also rich in nutrients. It's just right for someone with a cold to have a bowl."

"However, it looks a bit cold. I'll go heat it up for you, since it's been sitting out for so long."

"Hehehe, I asked you where you live this afternoon, Mana. But when I went there, the doorbell didn't ring. I thought you might have taken your medicine and fallen asleep, so I didn't want to disturb you. I figured you'd probably come out to buy food tonight, so I'd give you a surprise."

"Then, when your neighbor came over, she saw me. When she opened the door to greet her husband, she saw me still squatting at your door and asked me what was wrong. I told her I came to see you, and then she told me you were at work. I only came over after asking Mana."

"Well, I should have heated it up before coming over, so I wouldn't have to wait for it to cool down now that I've heated it up."

"Hehehe, next time, next time I'll remember to tell you first."

"Because, well, I was the one who did it. I stayed up all night and kept you up too. Otherwise, how would you have gotten a fever? So I wanted to give you a surprise to cheer you up."

"Did you wait a long time? No, no, your neighbor went out around 1:00 PM because it was too hot, so she went out to have a drink with her friends to cool off. She didn't get back until around 5:00 PM, so... well, it's nothing. How should I put it? Waiting for a while made me feel much more at ease. That way, when you wake up and see me first, and hear from your neighbor that I've been waiting for you for a long time, you'll be very happy, and I won't feel so uncomfortable!"

As Xiangzi spoke, he filled a bowl of soup for Chuhua and pushed it in front of the girl.

"Try it! To be honest, I've never done anything this complicated before. I was supposed to come at noon, but it turns out it's not easy at all."