I am your deceased love sustenance 1

"Years old? Years old!"

But when the scene inside was fully presented in front of Lixi, she froze.

What did she see?

She saw the girl slumped on the ground pitifully, looking at her with tearful eyes.

But Lixi saw more than that.

"Blood…"

Blood spread on Qiansui's wrist, where there was a not very deep cut, but even that scared Lixi to death.

"Lixi...don't come near me...wuwu..."

"What are you doing! Put the knife down quickly, let's talk..."

"I... I don't know what happened..." With a snap, the knife in Qiansui's hand was thrown down. "I feel so bad. After so many years, I have the urge to cut my wrists again... I can't control it..."

"It's okay, it's okay... I'm here..." Li Xi took the curled-up Chitose into his arms.

Her girl seemed frightened, and Lixi was even more frightened.

"Tell me, are you feeling uncomfortable? I'll take you to see a psychologist. We can definitely cure you..."

"No, it's not like that, Lixi."

Chitose held Riki's hand with her blood-stained hand.

Their eyes collided fiercely.

"Please, Lixi... just listen to me this once. Please let me play, or I'll really die."

"Please...if you forbid me from playing any more, I will really die."

Ch232. Finally, Shiina Riki made a compromise

The only thing I don't want is to beg you like this.

Really.

……

"Shiina Riki."

Noshiro Chitose's lips opened and closed lightly.

Li Xi didn't know how long it had been since she heard Chitose Noshiro call her by her name.

"age…"

"Please, could you please listen to me?"

"Go ahead..."

"You know, music... I really can't live without music."

"She is my spiritual support in life... When I thought I could really leave her, I found out that I couldn't."

"I think music has become entangled with my soul. I can't stop playing it, or I'll really die."

Qiansui held Li Xi's head, and his blood-stained hands were so warm.

Li Xi noticed that Qiansui's eyes were as red as flowing blood, while Qiansui's little face was as pale as her silver hair.

"Lixi, please listen to me... I don't know if you can understand my heart. You always say that you can understand, but I... I really can't give up my music for the sake of my health," Qiansui didn't dare to look directly into Lixi's eyes.

Her eyes swept across the floor, the bloody blade still sharp.

"I really found that once I stopped, I felt that life had no hope. I'm sorry to scare you...but I was depressed, and when I was depressed, I couldn't think straight..."

Qiansui's language organization ability is constantly declining. Li Xi stepped forward and hugged her tightly with distress: "Don't say it, Xiaosui, I know everything..."

"Lixi, please, let me continue playing, really."

Qiansui broke free from Lixi's arms and looked at Lixi with pitiful, begging eyes.

"But."

Li Xi's heart was broken.

If Chitose were to continue playing, her body would sooner or later continue to have problems due to the strain.

But if Chitose is not allowed to play, she will fall into a mood called depression.

Li Xichi recalled the diary of Qiansui that he had once secretly read.

If I remember correctly, the psychologist at that time asked Chitose to find a hobby to spend her life.

She knew Chitose liked the piano, but she never thought... was she so obsessed with playing it?

"Why…"

Li Xi clenched his fists unwillingly.

Faced with such a situation, Chitose had no way to vent the suppressed emotions in Lixi's heart.

"Why do you love playing so much? Even if you're deaf, you still want to play. Even if you have anorexia, you still want to play. Even if your physical strength can't support your training and performances... you still want to play... Don't you know that this is overdrawing your body?!"

"I know."

Chitose's response was calmer and more steady than Riki had imagined.

"I…"

This calmness silenced Li Xi.

"I can't care about those things. I know that everything I did was very selfish... But Lixi, this is one of the few things I want to do in this world, no matter whether it was in the past or now, no matter how many times I was dissuaded or ridiculed by others -"

"I want them all! To play!"

Qiansui almost roared out the last three words.

"Even if you die? Even if your life span is shortened?"

Li Xi growled softly. She didn't dare to touch Qiansui, for fear that she would not be able to control her strength and hurt him.

"Even if it means sacrificing my life, I just want to play... Li Xi clearly said that he understood me... And it was you, Li Xi! Who asked me to join the band."

"Everything was already predetermined. If I hadn't been inspired by Li Xi, I would never have joined a band. Why does Li Xi want me to stop now after giving me the opportunity? I can't stop... I really..."

"I can't stop."

After saying that, Qiansui leaned back in a daze.

The walls were cold, but surprisingly soothing.

Chitose Noshiro saw Shiina Riki's reaction clearly and was looking forward to Riki's actions.

"age…"

Li Xi's pupils shrank.

【Chitose is right.】

She suddenly realized that the current situation was caused by herself.

Qiansui's health is not good. If we trace the source of the disaster, it must be the drowning he caused while trying to save himself.

Li Xi knew that all of Qiansui's current illnesses were caused by her mistakes and negligence.

Not to mention, it was Li Xi who guided Chitose to join the band.

If Chitose hadn't formed a band, she wouldn't have been betrayed and abandoned by Toyokawa Shoko, wouldn't have developed anorexia, and wouldn't have continued to hurt herself.

So, why did I encourage Chitose to form a band?

Li Xi caused his fingers to tremble a few times.

[Because... I want to enter her life, because I want...]

【Possess her.】

So it was desire that caused everything?

Ultimately, it's my fault.

"I'm sorry...Xiaosui," Li Xi lost his balance and knelt in front of Qiansui with his hands on the ground.

"Forgive me, it's my fault... I..."

I shouldn't have let you join the band.

I shouldn't have known you... I shouldn't have...

"Lixi, I'm sorry, am I so selfish?" Qiansui helped Lixi up. The wound, which was not deep to begin with, had already scarred. "Can you forgive me for being hysterical because of music..."

"I…"

Chitose Noshiro, you, even at this point, you still care about my feelings.

"Xiao Sui, please, just this once, think about yourself a little more."

After saying this, Shiina Riki collapsed.

Just this once... Li Xi chose to let go.

She found that she had no reason to dissuade Qiansui anymore.

"Lixi, just one month, I only beg you to give me one month. As long as the performance next month is over, I will be obedient... okay?"

"Really? Just a month?"

The girls supported each other, and Shiina Riki's voice was full of disbelief.

Her eyes focused on Qiansui's earlobe, and then looked up along the earlobe.

The hearing aid kept flashing, it was so dazzling.

It's as glaring as a hearing aid in the sewer on a rainy day.

"Really? Please! Please forgive me for a month. This month, let me burn to my heart's content for the last time, okay?"

"Okay... but after a month, you can't hurt yourself anymore."

Lifting Chitose's arm, Riki felt his heart break.

This is a treasure that she is reluctant to even touch, how could it cause new wounds?

I swore to keep Qiansui safe from harm for the rest of his life.

How come the longer we know each other... Chitose becomes more unfortunate?

"Okay... I'll try my best."

"Let's go to the hospital."

"I don't want to go to the hospital anymore, please. Going there too often makes me want to die."

Yeah, I go there too often.

Lixi's eyes darkened, and she found that she was going further and further down the path of irresponsibility.

It seems like I can only bring misfortune to Qiansui.

"Sorry, Xiao Sui, I've been too sensitive lately."

"Let's go tend to the wound."

Ch233. The last month of Crychic

"It really is Xiangzi."

"Really? Let me see... ah, it really is."

Gao Songdeng pointed at a poster in the Ring and turned his head to look at Su Shihemu.

But apart from Mu, it seemed that only Su Shi was a little surprised.

"Mu, is that you?"

Deng blinked, looking at the green-haired girl whose face was half covered by a mask.

Although she was 99% sure that the person inside was Ruoye Mu, she still asked a few more questions.