I am your deceased love sustenance 1

Page 13

"To see a marching band,"

(Go see the band parade,)

[Really, this idiot, if I were a bad guy, she would be finished right now.]

Chitose stopped making trouble, put down his glass, took a step back and sat in the nearest seat.

She liked this song very much before analog technology was available. She found it one time when Jingben was debugging the radio. The song is still saved in Jingben's small mp4.

But my love for this song is far more than just because my sister likes to listen to it.

No matter when and where she heard this song, Chitose Noshiro would put down all the work in her hands, put aside all selfish thoughts and distractions, and even if she was performing surgery, she would sit up and listen to it with a firm gaze.

"He said, "Son when you grow up,"

(He said, "Son, when you grow up,

"Would you be the savior of the broken,"

(You are willing to be desperate,)

"The beaten and the damned?,"

(The savior of the losers and the unfortunate?")

The drum beats were dense and orderly, and the drummer was beating frantically in the dark. In just a moment, all the lights on the stage came on, and a band wearing black military-style parade jackets, jeans, T-shirts, leather gloves and even boots all in black appeared on the stage.

"He said "Will you defeat them,"

(He said, "Can you defeat them?")

"Your demons, and all the non-believers,"

(Your inner demons, and all those who doubt you,)

"The plans that they have made?,"

(And what schemes are they planning?)

"Because one day I'll leave you,"

(Because one day, I will leave you,)

"A phantom to lead you in the summer,"

(Transform into a ghost that guides you in summer...)

“To join The Black Parade.”

(Go join the Black Parade.)

The style of music suddenly changed here, and time was slowly passing but Takamatsu Deng could not feel it at all.

She now took the drinks handed to her by Chitose Noshiro one by one, and drank them uncontrollably.

"What a gorgeous song! So this is what the whole song is like..." Deng felt dazed, and the objects in his sight began to rise and fall and jump left and right.

She, she seemed drunk!

This song has such a luxurious melody! It could be split into three songs.

"Do you like it?"

Qiansui held Deng in her arms. The adult version of her was 1.7 meters tall, which was a huge monster compared to Deng, who was about 1.6 meters tall.

"Xiao Deng, drink less."

"Ah...ah!"

When Deng tried his best to break away from the music, he found that the bar was full of glasses of wine he had drunk.

No wonder my stomach feels bloated! I must have drunk too much again...

"We want it all, we wanna play this part,"

(We want it all, this is our stage,)

“We’ll carry on…”

(We will keep going.)

"..."

The light was already running out, but seeing that there was still half a glass of wine in his hand, he drank it all without hesitation.

[Actually... just keep walking...]

"That's a lie!"

What savior... what redeeming others... stop making fun of me!

"They are all fake!"

The so-called savior couldn't even save himself in the end, and the so-called community of shared destiny was nothing but a lie that came up on a whim in the afternoon.

There is no...there is no such thing as someone saving whom, and there is no such thing as...a lifetime!

"My whole life has been a lie..."

"Maybe? Xiao Deng, are you drunk?"

Chitose looked at Takamatsu Deng, who had started talking nonsense, and gently patted his back to comfort him.

Why is this kid getting so emotional?

It seems to have a bit of cursing connotation, really...

"I'm here, your sister is here, let's go out and be quiet for a while."

After leaving the money for the drinks, I took Takamatsu Deng and left STARY. Compared to the inside, the outside was so quiet that it felt like heaven.

The late night wind blew through Gao Songdeng's hair, as if a reluctant brown-haired girl was trying to keep her blue hair and white moonlight.

"Xiao Deng, are you feeling better?"

"No... I feel so bad. The music is so beautiful! But... it makes me feel so bad..."

Memories of the past came flooding back again and again, and Deng didn't want to think about the rainy day when the band broke up.

That was the home she once cherished the most, but the blue-haired eldest lady destroyed the community of destiny she created with her own hands.

Takamatsu Deng was completely devastated and became a lonely child. All this happened ten years ago, but to this day Takamatsu Deng still feels so sad that he can't control himself.

Especially under the catalysis of alcohol and punk music, sadness is simply uncontrollable and turns into a river in an instant.

"I...I don't know what happened to me...I'm sorry for being rude, I'll go home first..."

Gao Songdeng tried to run away.

Gao Songdeng ran ten meters and then fell down and couldn't get up.

Gao Songdeng curled up on the ground and cried.

"No, hahahaha."

What, what! Why are you still crying?

Qiansui was also drunk, but he was amused and sobered up a lot.

She walked slowly over, picked up the small lamp, and staggered to the nearby jumping bridge, but she could not walk anymore.

"Hey—Deng! We're drunk! We, uh, might not even be able to walk home!"

Things are getting a little out of control. I didn't expect Deng to be so drunk... Huhu, this idiot is now holding on to the overpass and blowing the wind weakly.

"I-I've been here! Xiaosui!"

Young? You...

"Why are you calling me Xiao Sui?"

Although it’s not the same simulation, I still want to cry when I hear Deng call me that affectionately again.

"I, I don't know, I..."

Deng used up his last bit of strength to straighten his back and shouted loudly to the empty overpass below:

"I want to...become a human! Why after all these years...I'm still...still the same!"

Ch18. I just don't want you to call me that.

"I want to...become a human!"

Gao Songdeng held this sentence in her mind for ten years. From the age of sixteen to twenty-six, she imitated human behavior day after day.

When humans go to school, she goes to school.

When everyone else was taking the college entrance exam, she also studied hard and got in.

Everyone worked, and she also found a job.

Others said that when you grow up you can no longer live with your parents, as that represents maturity and independence. She believed it and lived alone among a group of office workers.

But none of this made Gao Songdeng feel that he was integrated into the group.

Graduation ceremony...whether it's elementary school, junior high school, high school or college, why are people crying?

Why is everyone crying? Why can't she cry at all? Everyone treats her so well, treating her like a mascot and even a group favorite. Shouldn't she be feeling sad and depressed?

Yes, but she didn't feel sad.

Gao Song Deng is different from everyone else.

I don’t know when I realized this, but it doesn’t matter.

"I, I will never be able to become a human in this lifetime!"

After shouting the last sentence, Takamatsu Deng completely lost her strength. She fell backward and fell into the arms of Noshiro Chitose.

"Senior is in such a mess now."

"But, I've always been in such a mess, I..."

"Mom, come on, no matter how old Xiao Deng is, he still acts like a child."

Qiansui held the lamp and stood in front of the overpass again. Workers who had just got off work were driving under the bridge. The colorful lights were a microcosm of the city.

"Xiao Deng! Did you just say that you wanted to become a human?"

"Yes…"

"Great!" Chitose took a deep breath and, imitating Takamatsu Deng, shouted loudly to the crowd below, "I want to become a human too! I want to become a human with Deng-senpai!"

"What!? Years old!!"

"What? Senior Takamatsu Deng, who dreams of becoming a human, do you have anything else to say now?!"

"I...I want to say..."

Gao Songdeng opened his mouth.

"vomit…"

……

"I... ugh..."

Gao Songdeng lay on the toilet at home, retching for a long time but nothing came out.

"Really, really, Senior is such a fool. I thought he would say some sweet words, but he just spat it out."

Gao Songdeng is really strong and vomited all the way.

I vomited on the manhole cover on the way home, and when I got home I still wanted to vomit but nothing came out.

"Ahem, years old..."