Yes, Prime Minister of Japan

"What were the results of today's negotiations?"

Takajo Mayu stepped onto the podium, imitating Trump, waving her small, flowery hands, and lowering her voice to say:

"Never try to ask about the outcome, because there is good news at every moment!"

Under Li Xinghe's leadership, the Japanese government has gone from one victory to another, truly winning without becoming complacent!

Business leaders were interviewed.

Toyota and Marubeni announced that they will acquire the US stake in the Sakhalin oil and gas field and build an offshore oil and gas pipeline.

President Sally, with a relaxed and composed expression, made a firm announcement to the reporters:

"This is the economic boom created by Taiko by himself! During this period of economic boom, Japan's high-tech industries developed, and we also broke the problem of relying on a single resource. We finally began to change our old habit of still using fax machines and caught up with modern civilization."

Clever people have already started selling commemorative tickets online:

"Fellow citizens, please purchase the commemorative stamps for the Tomai Islands. This is the first time since the beginning of the new century that Japanese territory has been repaired. Our joy and happiness today are all thanks to the great leadership of His Excellency Taiko."

The offline promotional trucks for "Dududu" have reappeared.

The Japanese right wing, disgusted by Li Xinghe and forced to retreat into their shells, have now emerged again to cheer for Li Xinghe's reclaiming of the two islands, continuing their propaganda strategy of "bestowing the title of king." They're licking the boots of the unreachable Taiko (Li Xinghe).

Right-wingers kowtowed to Li Xinghe from afar in the street:

"Anyone who dares to oppose Lady Chiyo will have their head smashed!"

Although it happened a few months earlier than expected, the prospect of Japan-Russia economic cooperation and Russia's full opening to Japanese goods and businesses attracted a large amount of hot money circulating in Tokyo to Russia and Hokkaido, greatly mitigating the risk of economic stagnation.

Of course, many people are also asking, isn't Li Xinghe afraid of the Americans?

Economic cooperation between Japan and Russia was not a major problem during the Trump era, but the current Vance administration is not actually very harmonious with Russia.

While it's true that Trump has sexual fantasies about Putin, and Vance is reportedly a zero, Vance clearly has no interest in Putin.

This group of tech right-wingers pursues a transhumanist cyberpunk city, and Russia, in their view, is just a savage outside the city.

Therefore, the media are asking:

What was the US reaction?

How do you punish Li Xinghe, who acts recklessly every day, slapping the US in the face and then stuffing it with a treat, in a never-ending cycle?

Many media outlets have offered numerous reasons for the White House's continued silence.

But the most absurd answer is:

The US is like an octogenarian Biden, still not having realized what's happening. (The last part is a nonsensical string of characters and doesn't translate directly.)

Shockingly, the political assessment of Japan by the White House and the Pentagon had just gone through three stages: from the three aircraft carrier battleships being described as "large iron lumps" to "somewhat threatening," and then to suspected "specialized amphibious assault ships." Then, the White House and the Pentagon began to study what these three aircraft carrier battleships could be used for if they returned to the United States.

After analyzing numerous possible scenarios, they concluded that these three offensive heavy-duty aircraft carriers were utterly useless. Even if deployed to the Red Sea to fight the Houthis, the US military lacked sufficient near-shore missile defense capabilities, making them mere targets. Ultimately, they decided that these three carriers were best suited for bullying small American nations in the Caribbean.

However, they cannot cross the Panama Canal because their massive flight deck and naval compartments are far too wide. While they might seem aggressive in island-filled Asia, they are unacceptable even to the U.S. Navy.

Finally, the Pentagon advised the White House that these three aircraft carriers should not be transported back to the United States, but should be sold directly to Li Xinghe, as they would just be sitting idle and wasting fuel if they came back.

It's extremely embarrassing.

Just as this conclusion was reached and the White House press secretary was preparing to announce the status of the three aircraft carrier battleships and their future trajectory, reporters swarmed in, asking completely different questions.

How does the White House view the Nimitz's reactivation?

"what?"

The White House and the Pentagon only learned about the Nimitz's restart from the news, even though the restart process had already reached the initial stage.

A reporter pulled out a printed photograph and showed it to senior U.S. officials to demonstrate the current condition of the Nimitz.

On the drawing board, a fully refurbished giant ski-jump aircraft carrier, escorted by tugboats, is conducting its first sea trial in Tokyo Bay. The pristine white and sleek phased-array radar bridge elegantly integrates fire control and guidance radar with various integrated processing centers. The refurbished and repainted hull curves gracefully, and all the old, outdated circuitry and shipboard equipment have been removed and replaced with more futuristic, modern integrated wiring. The old elevators have been removed and replaced with new electric elevators for the take-off and landing of the Dragon Sakura fighter jets.

The ship underwent a major overhaul, with 41% of its steel structure replaced, all pipelines replaced, and all radars, close-in weapon systems, and missiles replaced with Chinese or Japanese-made parts. Even the paint job was changed, using white as the base color and adding many gold lines for decoration. If it weren't for the classic American aircraft carrier hull, it would be difficult for viewers to tell that this is a 55-year-old secondhand American behemoth.

The white, futuristic-looking giant ship, seemingly wrapped in golden lines, is now inlaid with the three Chinese characters 'Tamamo-no-Mae'.

Now, she has transformed from a weary, battered female knight into a large, fair-skinned, blonde fox with an Eastern flair. This is absurd, yet perfectly logical, because blonde hair and fair skin are characteristic of white women.

This elegant white golden fox looks newer and more beautiful than any of the US Navy's active aircraft carriers.

The spokesperson looked completely bewildered.

"What? This is the Nimitz? Um... I think the US government has authorized the Li Xinghe government to restart the Nimitz, so... um..."

As is well known, the old Nimitz was in such bad shape that it looked like an old dog lying on the roadside. And most US warships were in a similar state of disrepair, rusted and decaying.

A reporter asked from below:

"Why not give him the Eisenhower and exchange it for the Nimitz?"

"Because repairing the Nimitz cost nearly $10 billion."

"Then give him $10 billion! Return the Nimitz to the United States!"

The reporters themselves were arguing incessantly.

A British journalist suddenly jumped out to stir up trouble:

"Ms. Spokesperson, are you aware that Japan and Russia have signed an energy agreement that will weaken the competitiveness and market share of US LNG exporters, leading to more workers losing their jobs?"

The French journalist had ill intentions:

"Yokosuka Harbor is full of warships. Japan has chosen Russia, and the confrontation in East Asia seems unstoppable. What is the White House's opinion?"

The spokesperson asked with even greater surprise:

"What Russia?"

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

After a chaotic interrogation, the White House discovered from the media that Li Xinghe had restarted the Nimitz at an astonishing speed, and even more astonishingly, he had grown closer to Putin faster than Trump had ever been in his pursuit of Putin.

It was as if, suddenly, Li Xinghe and Putin entered the church hand in hand.

The White House has gone into a complete mental breakdown.

Because Li Xinghe darts left and right like a cockroach, the White House can no longer keep up with his speed.

As long as Li Xinghe generates enough new problems, the White House will be increasingly entangled in troubles and left behind, failing to achieve the goal of criticizing or punishing Li Xinghe.

While you're criticizing him, he's already moved on to the next task.

……

Taiwan.

In Taipei's Legislative Yuan, legislators are engaged in a tense vote.

The head of the Legislative Yuan said on stage:

"The Japanese immigration and nation-building plan proposes establishing a new Taiwanese government on the leased Shikotan Island, free from external supervision and control, and relocating millions of Taiwanese citizens to settle on the Kushiro Plain in Hokkaido. Voting begins!"

Amidst the intense political tensions, the sinking of Taiwan became the only possible chance for survival.

Don't be fooled by the hype that Taiwan is becoming like Ukraine; the vast majority of people don't want war or to end up like Ukraine.

Lai Ching-te, looking embarrassed, said to the furious committee members:

"Governing a country and waging war are nothing more than fighting, defending, and retreating. The Taiwanese military fights on the front lines, while the Taiwanese people defend the rear..."

Mei Chia-shu, the Chief of Staff of the Taiwan Armed Forces who was present at the meeting, slammed his fist on the table and stood up:

"So let the political parties and powerful figures go first!"

These words caused awkwardness among both the blue, green, and white camps.

Taiwan's Vice President Hsiao Bi-khim read out the results of the secret negotiations:

"In any case, we agreed to relocate to Shikotan Island and the Okimai Islands to establish a provisional government. Li Xinghe offered very favorable terms to Japan: Taiwanese citizens would be treated as refugees; a special management agency would be established; multinational treatment would be granted; assistance would be provided to the Taiwanese government to continue its international operations; companies like TSMC could relocate to Hokkaido; a nuclear power plant would be built specifically for Taiwanese businesses; and Taiwan could retain its own banks and life insurance companies..."

A series of seemingly outlandish clauses were gradually revealed to the legislators.

"This is the '11 Secret Cooperation Principles between Taiwan and Japan'."

Wang Shih-chien, known for his witty remarks, suddenly seemed to wake up from a dream:

"That's impossible. Only a scammer would offer you such good treatment."

Chief of Staff Mei Jiashu and a group of generals argued stubbornly with Lai Ching-te:

"Then what are we guarding? For so many years, we've spent so much money, using some kind of 'Porcupine Plan,' squeezing the people's hard-earned money to buy a bunch of junk from the US—F-16Vs, M1A2 tanks, and what about Yunpao and HIMARS? What is the point of buying all this junk?!"

"You can leave, we'll guard the place!"

Taiwan's National Security Bureau, located on Yangmingshan Mountain in Taipei (commonly known as "the mountain"), is Taiwan's highest intelligence agency. Director Tsai Ming-yen expressed deep disappointment with the government's statement.

He stepped back, representing Taiwan's intelligence forces, who were also expected to stay and stand with the Taiwanese military.

The situation in Congress was like a family splitting up in Liangshan Marsh.

There are many problems with relocating to Hokkaido.

The biggest problem is, is there any information in Taiwan that can be kept secret?

It wasn't long before the news was leaked.

The news that "Taiwan will relocate entirely to Hokkaido, Japan, with its capital located on Shikotan Island, which Japan leases from Russia" spread like wildfire on the island.

The public initially didn't believe it, but when Russia quietly confirmed the return of the Shikotan Islands and the lease of Shikotan Island as a special trade zone, the news seemed incredibly real.

"It's over...it's all over..."

Many older Taiwanese people sighed with deep regret:

"The orphans of Asia have gained a new sorrow."

From the war records of Zheng Chenggong at the end of the Ming Dynasty, to the invasion and killing of Han and non-Han peoples during the Qing Dynasty, and then to its cession to Japan, Taiwan experienced harsh language and rule during the Japanese occupation. During World War II, 12 Taiwanese men and women joined the Japanese army. After the Kuomintang returned, the brutal White Terror and land reforms added new hatred and contradictions.

For more than a century, Taiwan has been caught in a web of shifts, and the people's sense of national and ethnic identity has changed several times, yet it still cannot find peace.

The Lai Ching-te government firmly denies any intention to relocate, but several of Taiwan's major life insurance giants, including TSMC and MediaTek, have announced their decisions to establish branches in Hokkaido. Even a blind person could tell something was amiss.

Once the decision to flee was made, public sentiment suddenly shifted dramatically.

This is similar to the Northern Song Dynasty's decision to move south after its collapse. In an instant, the hearts and minds of the people in the north were lost, and its so-called status as the legitimate successor of China was also lost.

Everyone knows you're going to run away, so who will still be on your side?

There was a commotion on the island.

"We've joined the Communists!"

Some heavily indebted Taiwanese military police secretly plotted to rescue the unfortunate individuals involved in the 2025 incident of military police waving the five-star red flag from prison, especially Li Huixin, the deputy leader of the Baoyang Society of the Taiwan Sun Alliance, who was the mastermind.

The Sun Alliance was originally a branch of the Tiandao Alliance, a criminal organization, but later became independent and is one of Taiwan's major gangs. After being rescued, Li Huixin went into hiding in the city and openly declared her intention to storm prisons and rescue all "pro-communist" political prisoners suppressed by the Taiwanese government. This alarmed the head of the Taiwanese military police, who urgently contacted several gang leaders over dinner, wanting to find out where the gangsters were really headed.

But the gang leaders all refused.

Even the local Taiwanese gangs are giving the government the cold shoulder, and are going back to their hometowns to organize their elders to consider defecting to the Communists.

The unrest on the island has also implicated an increasing number of resurrected US troops.

Indo-Pacific Commander Paparo was eager to interfere with the command of the Taiwanese military, and in an internal meeting with senior Taiwanese military officials, he strongly criticized:

"At least seven ship captains in the Taiwanese military have pro-CCP leanings; a large number of sailors have ambiguous relationships; the use of Chinese-related software apps within the Taiwanese military has surged; according to intelligence investigations, they are using secret spyware that the United States cannot monitor, namely 'QQ' and 'WeChat,' and various mainland spies are inciting each other to defect in group chats. For example, this message, 'Come to Xiamen, we'll take you around Siming,' is a very typical CCP psychological tactic to soften the soldiers' resistance!"

Therefore, Paparo forced the Taiwanese military to issue the following order:

"Seven prohibitions in the military! No using Chinese software, no accessing TikTok, no using hostile language, no watching mainland Chinese dramas, no desertion of duty, no leaking secrets, and no possession of the five-star red flag. Any violation will be considered treason!"

Taiwanese soldiers guarding the beach were furious about the regulations. If they can't watch TikTok, or watch TV dramas and websites from the other side of the strait, what are we supposed to watch?

Do you want to see those big-butt black women in America who don't speak the language dancing like wild boars?

As the message was pushed down the chain of command, soldiers exchanged barbs with their officers and military police:

"So what if you betray the country? You're going to jail now, but I'll get a promotion by the end of the year! When you're in jail, I'll be watching you from outside with the five-star red flag!"

Since Taiwan has long since abolished military law, the actual sentences range from a few months to five years. As is well known, the Taiwan Strait crisis has reached a critical year, and the Taiwanese government will be gone next year.

He's now being sent to jail on charges of treason and collusion with the Communists. After a few months, when he gets out of prison, he'll immediately be a patriotic and pro-Communist hero.

The officer had no choice but to turn a blind eye.

Military law simply cannot be enforced.

June has arrived.

The restless dark clouds, swept by the typhoon, disturbed the land of Taiwan.