I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

"...Maybe it doesn't look like that to you, or to others. But that's the truth."

This answer is absolutely flawless.

"Huh...what's that?" Ye Jin was clearly dissatisfied with my explanation. "Yes, yes. No, no. Why are you saying so much?"

"My answer is, of course, 'yes.'" He paused. "Although we rarely go on dates and our time together is relatively short, there's still no problem with our relationship."

I didn't even blush or feel my heart skipping a beat when I told this lie. It seems I have grown a lot.

"........"

She had nothing to say about it.

"...In that case, I have nothing more to say." Ye Jin suddenly fell on the sofa, his eyes still fixed on the TV. "Since she still has something to talk to you about, I won't waste your time."

"...Thank you very much." I said and left the sofa.

"Please close the curtains behind you before you go upstairs," she instructed me slowly. "Please grab me a drink when you pass the kitchen, and remember to call me when you're ready to eat. Thank you."

“…”

As a normal brother who cares deeply about his sister, I would naturally take reasonable measures.

"...Do it yourself."

After saying this, he went straight upstairs.

Then I felt something soft hitting the back of my head.

Gradually wavering thoughts

"Wow——"

With the sound of friction between the rollers and the track, the roughly orange curtain was half-pulled up by me, and the sunlight coming through the window was separated from the area covered by the curtain. If you observe in the dark, you should see dust that is particularly conspicuous under the sunlight.

Is this what they call illuminating everything?

"So...."

I walked slowly to the other side, reached out and grabbed the curtain that felt nice to the touch, and then pulled it in the other direction. I don't know if it's because I bought it not long ago, but I didn't feel any resistance when pulling it.

"Wow——"

The same sound echoed as the curtains were completely drawn. While they couldn't block out all the sunlight, the room was now dark, and with the nearby air conditioner running, the unbearable summer heat was no longer noticeable.

"call--"

I felt inexplicably refreshed.

Then my gaze shifted to an object near the stairs. It was the pillow I had just thrown. It had been on the sofa, but I had to force it to leave its place temporarily to hit that idiot brother who had no sense of brotherly responsibility.

"Really..." Since there was nothing else to do, I walked over to pick it up and threw it on the sofa next to me. "Isn't it just pulling the curtains? You won't even do this for me."

Feeling a little unhappy, his eyes naturally turned towards the stairs leading upstairs.

“…”

I don't know what they were doing in the room.

Normally, when a boyfriend and girlfriend are in the same room, you know what will happen. But this is not normal, because my impression of my brother is that he does not have that courage, and even in adolescence, he has not shown any physical desire for women.

"..."

No, it seems there is.

Because I suddenly remembered the erotic book he had bought before.

Haha, let's ignore that. I don't think their relationship is truly boyfriend-girlfriend, because no matter how you look at it, it's too distant. Imagine two people dating to the point where they can even be in the same room, but judging from their direct interactions, there doesn't seem to be any special intimacy...at most, the girl has a slight crush on the guy, but he doesn't seem to show much affection for her.

If I think about it carefully, it seems that she is not the only one. I have the impression that there are many girls who are very close to my brother, but I can't explain their relationship clearly. If I consider them as classmates, it doesn't seem that simple.

I can't figure out what this guy is thinking. Logically, if those two were truly a couple, and they were so close to other girls, Xiaoye would have been furious. But instead of complaining, she acted as if nothing had happened... If this isn't a case of being incredibly broad-minded and believing in "love without boundaries," then it's clear they aren't truly a couple.

Regardless of his answer, I still think the second situation is more likely.

"I'm a little thirsty..."

After realizing I was standing there in a daze at the stairs, I turned and headed for the kitchen. As is my brother's habit, he always keeps plenty of drinks in the refrigerator, even in winter. This is the only thing I admire about his persistence... but it's not a very glorious achievement to state.

"Oh... found it."

The bottle has become so cold in the refrigerator that the moisture outside absorbs heat and liquefies when it comes into contact with the bottle. Although it looks like the bottle is sweating, it is just a state of "clinging" or, if you insist, it has attached itself.

Well, there are many such characters in real life. For example, the group of people who sent me love letters.

"Crack, sizzle~"

The sound that occurs after opening the pull ring.

It reminded me of TV commercials. My mind raced with images of fizzy drinks. Even before I took a sip, I felt a surge of refreshment. This phenomenon is similar to salivating at the sight of pungent foods like chili peppers and lemons. It's a natural learning process... The human body is truly incredible.

This shows that advertising can be quite effective if it hits the mark... although the branding doesn't seem quite right.

"......"

I'm actually not a huge fan of carbonated drinks, which is completely different from my brother. I hate the tingling sensation in my mouth, and drinking it straight up feels like swallowing a gulp of gas... So to solve this problem, I pour it into a cup, and the gas escapes a lot during the process. I just repeat the process a few times, even if it does reduce the heat relief.

“————————”

After a while, the drink finally reached a sip-worthy level. And I was able to temporarily shift my attention from such trivial matters... But isn't summer vacation all about relaxation? Thinking back to my previous summer vacation, I can't remember how I spent it. It seems we tend to overlook mundane things, and coupled with the memory curve, remembering what we did every day is impossible... unless that day is truly significant. Even then, even if something significant happens, we only remember the cause and effect, not the specific date.

So forgetting the past is an inevitable result.

People grow by constantly letting go of their past selves. After all, no one wants to remember the dark histories of childhood and middle school. And for those with even more unpleasant memories, forgetting is also a part of achieving happiness.

"........"

My eyes turned to the stairs again.

Perhaps his current life is happy enough for him.

But how long can this situation last? For some reason, I suddenly felt this worry. It wasn't without reason. Ever since his sudden change in attitude the day before yesterday, I'd vaguely sensed that he was intentionally or unintentionally controlling the level of intimacy with those around him. I still don't know the reason behind this. Perhaps he simply doesn't want people to get too close, but I can't imagine why. Or perhaps he's already seen through the women's minds and is trying to maintain a balance in his relationships with them... But with his emotional intelligence, would he really consider this aspect?

"Ah... What on earth are you thinking about..."

I have had this question about him more than once.

From the time I first met him until now, I still have no idea what he wants to do. Although he looks like a normal high school student, I always feel that he behaves differently at certain times.

“People change when they encounter certain events.”

I think for him, the people and things that can motivate him to change are real. So the current situation will eventually be broken.

......

The TV volume was turned up to the perfect level, and I had my phone in my hand. The boredom continued, and it seemed that the only thing I could do to pass the time was the TV, so I decided to use my phone to kill time.

So why did I have to stay here? I'd be playing games alone at home anyway, so if I was bored, there was no difference between the two situations. But the thought that the guy would treat me to a meal if I stayed here was enough to keep me here.

"Anyway..."

Slide your finger across the screen, drag the card, and release a fireball at the designated unit. "Aha, aha, aha, aha..." (Unlimited fireballs released)

"You should handle your own affairs yourself."

Chapter 30: Gradually Shaking Thoughts

Lately, I've been emailing her my finished work, so she hasn't been putting off submitting to me for a long time. Incidentally, my writing style is different from that of typical online novelists. Generally, online novelists update once to five times a day, or even more. While this approach is certainly more popular in terms of popularity, it also consumes more energy. This is how I've been writing since I first started.

However, after achieving higher levels of success, my creative thinking changed. Since I didn't have to worry about popularity anymore, I focused on the quality and content of the story, which is why I had people like editors to oversee it. After all, writing something in a day is too hasty, and it's difficult to write a good story. Personally, I don't really recommend this approach. So, after becoming a writer at this level, I would have staged ideas for the story, then hand over the simple content to Xiaoye, let them make their judgment, and then determine the general direction... To be honest, it's really close to the way comics are updated, first deciding on the outline of the story, and then constantly improving it. With enough time and word count to support it, the reader's reading experience is much better. It's just that the waiting time is longer. [It would be nice if it were actually like this... uh hehe (?ー｀)]

"Is there something you want to say... I remember I didn't delay the update." I was a little concerned about Xiaoye's words, so as soon as I entered the door, I started asking her what she wanted to tell me.

"It's definitely not about that..." Xiaoye looked at me helplessly, "Could it be that in your mind, my role is to urge you to submit your manuscript?"

"...Isn't it?" Otherwise, what is the purpose of this editor-in-charge's job.

"That's too much. I have my own difficulties. Besides, do you think I want to rush you? It's because you don't update properly. Do you think it's that easy to arrange the layout? If the submission is late, of course we have to make a lot of adjustments because of this, such as temporarily publishing excellent short stories, or even directly adding interviews with famous authors."

"...Ah, this is really hard work."

But I've definitely seen this routine before.

"So it's really helpful that you can update steadily like this..." She looked very tired.

"...I just did a little work..." And I also roughly understood from this that she must be worried about something.

"Well, let's get down to business," I reminded her.

"Oh, yeah... Listen, there's actually someone who's even more outrageous than you, Sheji, who's appeared recently. She just left a notice saying she won't be updating much anytime soon, and then we can't get in touch with her anymore. Our original plans have been completely disrupted, and even the editor-in-chief is having a headache because of this."

"Oh wow, there are actually such brave warriors..."

Even the suspension of updates was so decisive, and once it was suspended, it disappeared completely, which is simply a model of delaying updates in the industry. Not to mention me, it seems that few people can do this... It seems that this person must have a certain popularity, otherwise there would be no confidence to make such a move.

"Ah? What did you say?"

"No, I mean...that guy is too much."

Anyway, let's finish listening to the story first.

"And this person is none other than someone else."

"..."

Wait, why do I have a bad feeling?

"It's Teacher Alia. She's been updating pretty consistently, but she suddenly stopped for some reason. It's only been less than a month, so the number of updates she missed isn't that many, so we can still manage. But we still don't know how long she plans to delay. This situation is really frustrating for us planners, but we have no way to confirm..."

"...So why did you come to me?"

I don't know how to tell fortunes or track people, so even if you ask me to find her, I can't do it... And if you think about it carefully, I don't even have her contact information.

"Well... although it's a bit difficult to say, this seems to be the only solution I can think of." Xiaoye seemed a little hesitant, but finally made up his mind. "In order to fill the space for the next issue, please add something more!"

"...No, why did that guy delay and let me fill the gap?" This is too unreasonable.

"That's right... Actually, this is just my own random thought. The editor hasn't made a decision yet. But if I could ask you to write something, I think the pressure on them would probably be relieved a little."

"...I can't do that. And if I post more for no reason, wouldn't the popularity of other authors be affected? And there's no precedent for this. If other authors are dissatisfied with this, then it will be even more troublesome. Oh, and especially if readers are dissatisfied, what if someone uses this as an excuse to ask other authors to post more?"

After all, this monthly publication is designed to compare authors of similar skill, and the popularity of these publications determines the publication of physical books, which in turn are tied to profits. This is simply malicious competition, and it's bound to cause resentment among authors who make a living from it.

"...That's right, I wasn't thoughtful enough." She gave a helpless look. "Actually, even if you agreed, if I went to discuss it with the editor-in-chief, he'd probably reject me for the same reason... Although I was told before I came here not to worry, that the situation would be handled by the responsible person, so I just had to do my job well, I still want to do my best... I also want to do my best to do this job well."

"...You're really working hard." I couldn't help but sigh as I looked at Xiaoye who was feeling frustrated about this, but it wasn't because I felt it was troublesome, but because I felt inexplicably relieved.

Honestly, I haven't thought about what kind of job I'd like to do in the future, so I don't understand the feelings of a working person struggling to make a living. But seeing her like this now, I finally understand a little bit.

"Although it might seem unreliable for an outsider like me to reassure you... but those people have been working for so many years. They've seen similar things, even worse than this, right? So since they've told you to work peacefully, all you have to do is trust them."

“…the state…”

"And speaking of which, I also know a little about why Teacher Alia stopped writing books and lost contact."

"What?!"

Xiaoye was indeed surprised when she first heard what I said, but it was only for a moment. She seemed to remember how I had scared her before, and then her eyes became gloomy.

"...Are you lying to me again? That's terrible."

"certainly not."

Now I seem to have really lost her trust.

"I'm serious. Although I received similar information when I was in contact with them before, I still didn't expect that she would stop updating because of that incident."

I have to say, this is consistent with her usual style and personality. I am not surprised at all that she can do this. She also doesn't seem to care about sales or anything like that. After all, she looks very rich.

"Really? Do you really know? What exactly did she do? Tell me quickly."

Xiaoye, whose curiosity had been restored, kept urging me to explain.

"Okay, okay... Wait a moment, I'll show you something." I said, turning around to look for the flyer. "After showing you that, the explanation should be clearer..."

"Eh? Did she go do something important?"

Perhaps it was the suspense in my explanation that piqued her interest. She seemed to be actively imagining something...

"Could she be traveling abroad? I've heard that Teacher Alia's family is very wealthy. Maybe she went to Hawaii or the Maldives... Wait, could she be volunteering? Or somewhere overseas... Wait... If she's abroad, it might be more meaningful."

"Why do we always associate it with foreign countries, and it's all based on this premise?"

I'm too lazy to even go out, let alone go abroad.