An infinite journey starting from paradise

This was the only thought that came to Dongzi's mind after he learned about his bizarre life experience.

"Go paint, focus your attention on the paper, and you can forget about everything for a while.

Forget it, forget it. The fact that you are an unwanted child.

I've known for a long time that... there's probably no one in this world who loves me. Whether they like me or hate me, I don't feel anything.

But...but...why do I feel so bad?"

Lin Shangren stared at Dongzi's back.

"Sixteen, neither too old nor too young, no longer a child, but also unable to support herself. It's hard to control her own life. Half an adult, without the ability to choose her own life. She was originally at this age... a good and innocent child, who had done nothing wrong, yet she still had to endure this pain.

The family she had been relying on had become completely illusory. Her adoptive mother was jealous of her, and her uncle had lust for her. Who could she rely on?

Dongzi lowered his head and felt a little sour in his nose.

"Originally... it doesn't matter what happens. People like me... the real me is just like this... I only cause trouble to others, and no one wants me."

She has always been an insecure person because of her family environment, the oppressive school, and because she herself doesn't understand what she wants or who she wants to be.

Dongzi has always felt incomplete, as if something is missing, so she wants to find her true self. She fears the unknown future, so she turns her attention to her long-forgotten childhood. However, after learning about her own life story, she becomes even more confused.

"What should I do? Where should I go? I..."

Dongzi didn't dare to think about these questions. She wanted to escape, escape far away, but where should she escape to? Was there really a place for her in this world?

Lin Shangren walked to Dongzi's side and gently hugged her delicate shoulders...

Chapter 109 Dongzi: "I can hold it in."

What emotions and feelings are most important to humans?

Family? Friendship? Love? The sense of accomplishment from success? Or sensory stimulation?

In Lin Shangren's opinion, for the complex human race, there are only two truly important, or ultimate, feelings and emotions: excitement and peace of mind.

The desire to live in a safe and controllable environment, while also yearning for the unknown and uncontrollable excitement, seems to be what humans pursue. If these two points can be met, then life can probably be happy.

Kuchiki Fuyuko is clearly a child who lacks a sense of security and is hesitant to seek excitement. She lives in a daze, with no one to rely on.

"If you're sad..."

Before Lin Shangren could finish his words, Dongzi gently pushed Lin Shangren's hand away.

"I'm fine. Even if I know my life story, it won't be any different from before, right?" Dongzi raised his head and looked into Lin Shangren's eyes. "Don't tell me that you cry when you're sad. I won't cry over such a thing."

Lin Shangren shook his head. "No, I wouldn't say such a corny line. What I want to say is, if you're sad, just curse it out. Anyway, you haven't done anything wrong. Instead of being sad yourself, you might as well curse those idiots who really did something wrong."

"What...?"

Dongzi obviously didn't understand what Lin Shangren meant.

"You can't curse? Then you can complain and rant, right?" Lin Shangren asked. "Well...take your adoptive mother, Mrs. Kuchiki, for example. She's so irresponsible. She just sat there and watched her daughter suffer from malnutrition and anemia without doing anything.

And your uncle and grandfather. Oh, they are doctors, but they dare to come out and treat patients when they can’t even take care of their own little girl.”

"teacher?"

"Isn't what I said the truth? Well, even I, an outsider, can't stand it anymore. As the person involved, you must have more grievances and complaints, right?" Lin Shangren said, "Just say it. It's better to say it out loud. Don't keep it in your heart. Instead of hurting yourself, it's better to blame others."

"Huh...I..."

"Go ahead. You haven't done anything wrong. You wouldn't do anything bad because of depression. You haven't instigated anyone to sell their bodies. You haven't hurt anyone. You're just living a good life. There's nothing wrong with complaining."

"Ugh, so annoying!" Dongzi suddenly shouted, "What?! No wonder you've been ignoring me, it turns out you just brought me home as a temporary spiritual sustenance! All you do all day is complain about yourself, arrange flowers, and act like a spoiled child to your uncle. Come on, how old are you? If you two really want to go to Denmark or Finland together!"

And my uncle…can't he keep a little distance? Damn it, damn it, damn it. Grandpa also turned a blind eye to all this. You are the director of a big hospital, can't you take care of your own children?

What on earth is that idiotic school teaching? Piety, obedience to rules, no contact with outsiders... Hey, what on earth are you trying to cultivate? Are you going to make students live a monastic life of abstinence for three years, and then marry off to a suitable family after graduation? Are you kidding me?

And you, teacher...

You're being overly enthusiastic... Even though I commissioned you... Even though... why are you being so... We're completely different. You're too strong-willed. There's no need to care about someone like me..."

"Because you asked me for help, and I intend to help you, it's that simple." Lin Shangren said, "How are you feeling? Are you feeling better?"

"Well…"

Dongzi nodded and then shook his head.

"Why, you don't like this way of venting?"

"I... I don't know." Dongzi lowered her head. "Whether I like or hate it, I don't feel anything. It's just... I feel like there's probably no one in the world who loves me.

I’m so scared…I don’t know what to do…”

"Then rely on me until you can figure it out on your own."

"teacher."

Dongzi gently touched Lin Shangren's cheek with her fingers.

Lin Shangren wanted to give her a hug, but for some reason he kissed her lips.

"Um…!"

Dongzi was a little surprised, but immediately relaxed.

"Hmm... huh..."

It was just a kiss between lips and teeth, without any unnecessary movements, and time passed quietly.

After their lips parted, Dongzi said with a hazy look in his eyes: "What is this? Is the teacher feeling sorry for me?"

"Can't help it."

"Flirty. Chirp~"

"!"

This time it was Dongzi who took the initiative to kiss him.

"Hmm...hmm, chirp..."

Lin Shangren gently stroked Dongzi's cheek and sucked her lips a little harder.

"It's so itchy."

Dongzi chuckled and shrank his neck: "What should I do? Should I stick out my tongue? It feels a bit weird."

"Just leave it to me."

Lin Shangren's hand, which was stroking Dongzi's cheek, moved to her chest.

"Huh...mm...Teacher, you're so horny."

"Now...don't call me teacher."

"Hee, I did it on purpose."

Dongzi said this softly, then relaxed and let Lin Shangren do whatever he wanted.

"Shangren...I..."

Dongzi rubbed her legs and her tone became shy.

"What's going on here?"

Lin Shangren asked while stroking her thigh.

"Wow...don't bully me too much."

Dongzi took the initiative to lift up her skirt.

"Is it wet already?"

"I...I don't know."

Dongzi was a little bit upset, but she was actively seducing Lin Shangren. Lin Shangren was completely unable to resist Dongzi and put his hand into her inner thigh.

"ah!"

When she touched Dongzi's soft thigh, she trembled slightly.

"Are my hands cold?"

"No...no."

Lin Shangren began to gently stroke along the curve of Dongzi's thigh. When he touched the root of her thigh, Dongzi moaned and wanted to close her legs.

"Huh... your hands are so obscene..."

"Sorry, how about this?"

“It’s still very obscene.”

"Then I stop?"

"No... I hope you can... touch upwards..."

After saying that, Dongzi opened her legs slightly. Lin Shangren could clearly see her white panties, which had a slight discoloration in the middle.

"Don't stare there."

"Feel sorry."

Lin Shangren felt a soft and warm texture at his fingertips and gently reached forward. Dongzi frowned and let out a sweet moan.

She bit her lip, trying to hold back the sound.

"You don't have to endure it."

"But, what if someone..."

Dongzi looked around anxiously.

“It’s very remote here.”

Lin Shangren comforted Dongzi, his fingers hooked open the cloth wrapped around the wet flowers, and his fingertips gently teased the fluttering fish mouth.

“Ah… like this… ow…”

"It's already very wet."

"Because... because, huh, this is unavoidable." Dongzi said with a red face.

"Dongzi..."

"Sure, you seem to be... desiring me too."

Dongzi's hand touched Lin Shangren's legs.

"Yeah, um, I—"

When Lin Shangren pulled down Dongzi's underwear, she called out to Lin Shangren tremblingly.

"I'll be gentle, don't worry."

"Well, thank you."

In order to reassure Dongzi, Lin Shangren hugged her from behind and rubbed her slowly, waiting until it was wet enough before pressing against Dongzi's clitoris.

"ah!"

Dongzi's body suddenly leaned back.

"Does it hurt?"

"Ouch...it hurts so much."

"Then...can I use my hands again?"

"Is this better? Ah..."

Lin Shangren pulled out the candle handle that was slightly inserted into the center of the flower and began to caress Dongzi's body. As Lin Shangren kneaded and rubbed her, Dongzi's breathing became more and more rapid. After Lin Shangren soothed her with his hands for a while, Dongzi turned her head back with tears in her eyes.

"It's already possible."

"Are you okay?"

"I can bear it." Dongzi said, and moved his waist forward.

"Uh...that's it...ah!"

Dongzi screamed, pushing open the tight hymen, and Lin Shangren was completely united with Dongzi.

Dongzi gritted her teeth and endured the pain. Lin Shangren reached out and wiped the tears from her face.