I am only one world away from Yukinoshita.

"Please tell me how I should face Brother Sheng. I feel so despicable."

Please tell me, how can I forget you?

"Why, why did you abandon us? I will be a good child..."

Can you come back...?

Qinglai clenched his fists, his nails digging into his palms, leaving deep marks. Tears welled up in his eyes, as if he were a masochist, tearing open the scab in his heart and watching it bleed until it dried.

I'm sorry, I still can't stop blaming myself.

I'm sorry, I really can't let go of what happened.

I'm sorry, I may not be able to become the person you expect me to be.

Steady footsteps sounded behind him, the leather shoes making a crisp sound as they clicked against the stone bricks. The footsteps stopped not far behind Qinglai.

Kiyoshi turned around at the sound, and standing there was Takigatsu, wearing a white shirt. He had tucked the shirt into his trousers, and his fluffy curly hair was neatly tied to his forehead, a far cry from his usual messy and sloppy appearance.

He stood not far away, his eyes deep as he looked at Kiyoshi, who stood before his wife's grave.

"You really are here."

The mellow tone is like that of a soothing cello.

He was holding a bunch of Italian white sunflowers.

—I have always missed you.

P.S.: Although it was mentioned earlier that Kiyora wanted to slowly emerge from the shadow of her teacher, the brass band incident, coupled with Reina's actions, was like rubbing salt into the wound. Moreover, Kiyora was still alone this time, still refusing to let anyone get close. It was precisely because she took this matter so seriously that she couldn't easily speak about it. Only when Kiyora is willing to talk about this most painful experience will she truly be free from it. Kiyora is actually a coward, which is why she told Yukino that she was always in a sorry state.

When you read this chapter, I'll probably be practicing driving. Hopefully, my hands won't be shaking so badly I can't even hold the steering wheel when I get in the car...

Chapter 73 Sunlight Through the Cracks

"Is the school okay?"

Standing side by side in front of the grave of the person who was once the most important to them, Kiyoshi simply stared at the smiling portrait, with two bouquets of flowers placed in front of it.

It's ridiculous that he can openly express his love, while she can only use ambiguous flower language.

“I’m leaving,” Taki said tenderly, looking at his wife’s tombstone, “just like you.”

"I made sure to ask for leave properly."

"I misunderstood you."

As if the unpleasant, venting-like confession had never happened, Kiyoyori found it hard to believe that he could speak to the other person so calmly.

Kiyoshi wanted to ask about his plans for handling the brass band, but then he realized he had also contributed to the mess and wisely kept quiet.

"Anyway, they don't need me now."

Taki started talking, though he was somewhat frustrated and even began to doubt whether he had been too hasty.

Perhaps he shouldn't have imposed his personal will on his naive students.

"Or am I too—"

"Aren't you an advisor? Who are you trying to impress by looking so dejected?" Perhaps because she had left the campus and was no longer bound by the teacher-student relationship, Qinglai subconsciously regarded him as that silly older brother who always smiled. "Now there's no one to comfort you by patting your hair!"

These words were like a sword piercing the broken hearts of both of them at the same time.

Yes, there will never be that person again, never again will there be those hands touching her hair to comfort her.

Taki blinked. Although he felt a fleeting pain, he was already an adult.

"You look just like your teacher when you're angry."

Taki replied with a smile, seeing Kiyori's appearance reminded him of his own student days, of his rebellious self being disciplined by Touko-sensei.

It felt like punching cotton. Qinglai turned his head away in frustration. He had always been good at changing the subject like this.

Are you just going to give up like this?

Taki looked down at the girl, whose eyes were still red and whose face was still stubborn.

She seemed to have grown much taller than I remembered. Without her baby fat, she no longer looked like a delicate little doll. With her mixed Western heritage, she had more defined features and a face than most Japanese people, sharp as a knife. Her big, watery blue eyes, which she used to have like a little puppy's, now held a maturity and vicissitudes that shouldn't be there for her age. Yet, the look in her eyes when she looked at him was still filled with the same resentment as always.

Qinglai is no longer the little boy I remember.

She grew up, without his knowledge.

He promised his wife he would take care of the girl for her, but he ran away because of his cowardice.

He failed to take good care of his wife, failed to keep his promise to Qinglai, and therefore has no right to see Qinglai or stand by her side in her place.

Is it really?

Takigatsu asked himself this question countless times.

Admit it, you still resent this girl—her frankness, her willfulness.

You despicable adult.

But the girl died, along with his wife.

He died too, alongside his beloved wife.

Faced with Kiyori's questioning, Takigatsu was unable to provide an answer, as if laying an offering at his beloved wife's grave would be a betrayal of her, but he could not find a better solution.

Reina Kousaka is undoubtedly the best solution. While Kaori Nakazeko is excellent, she is no match for Kousaka. The difference between them is not in their love for the trumpet.

It's talent.

Reina Kousaka possesses both God's favor and a passion for music, while Kaori Nakazeko is just an ordinary person who strives for success.

Takigatsu lowered his eyes and remained silent.

"Aren't we aiming for the national competition? Aren't we aiming to win the gold medal?! Aren't we aiming to fulfill our promise to our teacher?! Isn't this why you came to Soubu High School?! Now that you've so forcefully built up the brass band, don't give up so easily!"

No, that's not what she meant.

"If you don't do your job properly, do you expect those idiots to wake up on their own?"

It's because you didn't take good care of the teacher.

"I was so stupid to have had any expectations of you!"

If it weren't for you, how could I have let go of the teacher's hand?

"Then why are you here? Now! At such an important time!"

Takigatsu seemed to be provoked by Kiyori as well, and for a moment, the cemetery echoed with the resentful confrontation between the two.

"Didn't you come to Soubu High School for Chihiro's wish? Then you should be at school or practicing at home right now!"

Don't you feel any remorse for Chihiro's death?

"Your teacher told me your playing was a complete mess. Is this how you're preparing for the upcoming competition?!"

Do you not know what hopes Chihiro had for you? And now you trample on them like this.

"You failed to meet her expectations at all."

But she will still smile and be tolerant of you, because you are her favorite student.

"Your failure is disappointing, Kiyoshi."

Come on, I will bear your anger, your resentment, and your pain.

"You bastard—!"

Kiyoyori turned around and grabbed Takigatsu's collar, his knuckles turning an unhealthy white as he gripped him tightly. Hatred enveloped the two of them like a thick fog, but behind Kiyoyori's gleaming glasses, he saw a trapped beast licking its own wounds.

His chest heaving violently and his breath trembling made it impossible for Kiyora to utter a complete sentence.

"you you you……"

"It's too late..."

She rested her head on the other person's shoulder, her tears wetting his shoulder.

"sorry."

Takigatsu resumed his refined demeanor, whispering softly in Kiyoyori's ear. He mimicked his wife, gently stroking the heartbroken girl who was burying her face in the crook of his neck as she cried.

I'm late.

“Shengjun, music is a very wonderful thing.”

He recalled his conversation with his teacher on the phone earlier that day.

"People use language to cover up their true selves; language can lie. But music cannot. It is like a reflection of the performer's inner world, honest yet cruel."

"Everyone who understands and loves music cannot lie about music."

Thank you, teacher. I know what to do now.

"Kiyoshi, we can't stop here."

..................................................................

next day

Before the training officially began, Ogasawara gathered all the club members.

“Recently, I’ve heard a lot of untrue rumors about the teachers within the department, which has made it difficult for everyone to concentrate on practicing. Under these circumstances, it’s impossible to win even a silver medal, let alone a national competition.”

Contrary to her usual easygoing and agreeable demeanor, she pointed out the problem with sharp words, and her keen gaze made many gossipy members lower their heads.

"Even if the teacher knows some of the students, it is absolutely impossible for the teacher to show any favoritism in the selection process. If anyone has any complaints, please speak up here instead of whispering behind their backs. I will relay your concerns to the teacher. So, please raise your hand if you have any objections to the selection process."

The classroom was silent. Yoshikawa Yuko was the first to raise her hand, followed by a few other hands, but Nakazeko remained silent.

Just then, Takigaki walked in and was somewhat surprised to see the quiet scene.

What are you all doing?

"This indicates dissatisfaction with the selection process!"

Dissatisfaction with the selection process has turned into dissatisfaction with the advisors, and Yoshikawa is now like a hedgehog curled up in a ball.