The Daily Life of a Hogwarts Terrorist

At the time, I was still a newbie, having just been "recruited" by the organization. I was still immersed in the happy fantasy that the organization promised me a two-day work week with five days off, three long holidays a year, and an hourly wage of 1000 RMB.

Kosaka, a sister-complex, thought I had extraordinary bone structure and a celestial appearance, so he arranged for me to receive new employee training in Japan, which was publicly announced as an employee onboarding benefit—a one-stop service of company-funded learning and company-funded travel.

At first, I thought the focus was on the official expenses and the trip, so I gladly boarded the organized plane to Tokyo Bay.

I only realized it when I got there!

My period is so bad! They actually made me go to junior high!

Hey! Middle school! Middle school!

Did you make a mistake!

You're making me, a mercenary who's an expert in demolitions and kills without blinking an eye, go to junior high school!

Do you know how my math teacher died?

When I was seven years old, he unfortunately stepped on a landmine that was originally intended to ambush the Britannian army (I was the one who planted that landmine).

Although he only taught me for one day, I will remember him for a lifetime.

Because from then on, I never had a teacher for Chinese, chemistry, physics, biology, history, art, music... Incidentally, none of the other children in the village had one either, because he was our only teacher.

Strangely enough, although I haven't received much education, I understand all kinds of knowledge, from astronomy and geography to physics and biochemistry.

It's like I can understand it immediately with just one glance, as if I've known it for a long time... (Stop!!#)

Huh? How did I drift off again?

Well, anyway, a year ago, I enrolled in that lousy school called [School Name - likely a typo, should be "惹鹬醒А"].

My task, assigned by Amalgam, was to disguise myself as an ordinary person and monitor one student in my class every weekend to hone my infiltration and surveillance skills. I was also tasked with getting into Alfred Academy, the local top high school, a year later, and then trying to get close to a girl named Nunnally.

To be honest, the guy who assigned this task is an idiot!

Don't you know that I hate young girls the most?

But I accepted the money offered by the organization. After all, I wasn't going to start working right away. I could just coast along for a year and see what happens. Anyway, I'd get some financial support during that year, so why not take it?

Given my age and the funding provided by the organization, I could have been enrolled in the best third-year A class.

However, because Kousaka, a sister complex, embezzled half of my funds to buy sister complex games for my sister, when I met the chairman, I only gave him one-twentieth of the donation I was supposed to make for my enrollment. As a result, he kicked me to the worst class, Class 3-E.

Why is my life so miserable?

Huh? You said there's still half the funds left? Why not use it to bribe the chairman?

Nonsense! Insolence! Audacity!

This small amount of money, if Kosaka's sister complex can be greedy, why can't I be?

Rather than letting the shady boss use it, I'd rather use it myself!

So the next day, I ate oden, drank fruit juice and soda (the girl at the convenience store wouldn't let me buy alcohol, what a rip-off!), and sang as I went up the back mountain.

When I saw the classroom, my heart sank.

What a terrible place! A dilapidated classroom, a muddy playground, a bunch of kids who've lost their souls, and a homeroom teacher who seems to have nothing but a big heart.

I was so scared that I quickly took out my purse to warm myself up, and you know what? It actually worked.

Of course, at first, Kosaka's sister complex was very unhappy about me entering Class E, saying things like: "Can I still get into a top high school by entering this lousy class? Can I still get into Alfred? Can I still use my pretty boy charm to seduce the blind girl and make that scheming sister complex suffer and go crazy?"

Holy crap! So this is the true face of Kousaka's sister complex!

I thought to myself: You siscon, you think you can treat me like a gigolo? Believe me or not, I'll make you cry your heart out right now.

I can find out exactly where your sister works and who she spends her days with!

Believe it or not, I'll go flirt with your sister right now!

I really don't understand why you bunch of siscon fans are always fighting amongst yourselves! No matter what kind of sister she is, aren't they all the same after the explosion?

.

2. Back then, I was still a newbie (continued)

However, since I just can't bring myself to like Kirino Kousaka, and in order not to pollute my noble mind and body, and to show off my magnanimity, I've decided to let this siscon off the hook for now.

Later, she secretly sent an anonymous email to a guy named Lamperouge, along with a photo of Kirino and a confession.

Look how big my belly is.

However, in order to stop the Kousaka siscon from spitting in my face, I decided to explain a little. This kind of little lie is a piece of cake for me.

"Leader, look at those bookworms in Class A. They're obviously destined to be single forever. It's Qixi Festival and they're not even going out to have fun. All they do is read, read, read. They have no idea how important interpersonal relationships are."

So, I took it upon myself to get into Class E. And look at Class E, aren't the students really bad at studying? If they're bad at studying, they don't study; if they don't study, it means they're very idle; and if they're idle, they'll start dating, right?

Look, I'm making thorough preparations for next year's mission!

Kousaka, a sister complex enthusiast, thought it made sense. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect. A blind little loli can't be won over in a day, and a White Album scholar can't be made in a day either. So she believed me.

But, but, this idiot actually gave me a new task: I have to go on a date with the girls in Class E every weekend! Twice!

Dancing grass! Dancing grass! Dancing grass!

You don't know how much I hate women!

For some reason, I've had a particular dislike for women since I was a child.

This might be related to the fact that women of all ages like to pinch, rub, and lick my face.

Don't you know that saliva is dirty?

Huh? You're saying that cute girls' water is drinkable?

Hmph! Even the prettiest girls are reduced to a disgusting mess after an explosion. My hometown, Afghanistan, lacks everything, but it doesn't lack roadside bombs and beautiful women torn to pieces.

It's all Brittany's fault!

Yes! That's right, without them, why would I have gone to plant the bomb?

You should know that last year, I was responsible for two-thirds of the casualties in the Brittany numbered district army.

So in my hometown, people respectfully call me Ifrit, which means fire spirit.

When they heard that I had a new job in District 11, all the people in my hometown and surrounding areas cried. Everyone spontaneously came to see me off, which shows how much prestige I had in the area, even though I was only 13 years old at the time.

The truth is, the night before, the town's older single young men were spreading the word: "That devil is finally leaving!" "There can finally be women within a hundred miles!" "Even the older women from the Britannian army don't want to come here to whip us anymore since he came along!"

Although I heard everything, I still decided to forgive these idiots, after all, they were just tempted by beauty.

I really don't understand, what's so good about beauty? It makes me want to vomit.

Anyway, I'm leaving now and I won't be able to see it anymore, so I'm not going to care anymore.

Incidentally, although these guys were unkind to me, I still generously left behind all the reserves I had accumulated over the years, so that they wouldn't be wiped out in the future cleanup of Brittany.

I thought to myself: these prohibited items can't be taken on the plane, and it would be a waste not to use them. Consider this my way of contributing to my hometown before I leave.

So I spent two days filling the area around our town with them.

I haven't forgotten any of the main roads, all the side roads, even the mountain paths and river channels; I've installed infrared sensors on them all.

However, I didn't tell them about this because I wanted to give my fellow countrymen a big surprise. When the Brittany convoy arrives, they'll surely thank me profusely.

Then I left.

I heard that on the afternoon I left, 20 families in our village got married, and the whole town was planning a group wedding.

Honestly, they wouldn't even let me have a proper feast before I left. These heartless people.

When I boarded the plane, I vaguely realized that I seemed to have forgotten something, but because I was excited about my first time flying, I quickly stopped thinking about what I had forgotten.

Later I heard that someone in our town set off "big fireworks" that day, and the whole province felt the tremors. They must have had a lot of fun.

After that, I never heard any news from my hometown again.

Well, I'm not targeting anyone in particular when I say this; I'm just expressing that I don't like women.

Really, please believe me.

So when Kosaka, a sister-complex, asked me to go on a date with a girl, my first reaction was to refuse.

Damn it, he was supposed to rest five days a week and work two days, but it turned into going to school from Monday to Friday!

The promised three long holidays a year have turned into winter break, summer break, and spring break!

And you still want to take away my weekends?!

Whatthef!

Thinking about it this way, I immediately got emotional, and with emotional comes a bad expression, which means I'm giving up.

As a result, Kousaka, who is obsessed with his sister, panicked.

If I quit, what reason will he use to withhold the funds allocated by the organization?

So the sister-obsessed guy said, "Don't get emotional~"

"Hehe, I'm not emotional."

It's not that I don't have emotions, it's that I have a lot of emotions! Why should you eat the meat while I only get the soup?

The sister-obsessed guy ignored the sarcasm in my words and continued, "You should know that the organization values ​​you highly. You were given the rank of captain as soon as you arrived."

I chuckled.

"That guy named Qasim from your class is still just a low-ranking private, and he's currently participating in a wilderness survival competition in South America."

I chuckled and continued, "Who doesn't know that Leonard's sister became a colonel as soon as she joined the army!"

To everyone's surprise, as soon as these words were spoken, Kousaka, who was obsessed with his sister, exploded: "How can you compare to her? That woman is a Whisperer! If Kirino weren't a Whisperer, I would have let her in to gain experience long ago."

Damn, this sister-obsessed siscon who only thinks about getting benefits for his sister all day long is hopeless!

However, one word caught my attention: "whisperer?"

What is that? I know I can't eat it, but I think it's okay to put some detonators in there.

As expected, Kousaka's sister complex did not disappoint me. He knew what the Whisperers were and continued to explain: "As you know, this is our organization's dark history. Back then, we had not yet separated from the cult (in fact, we are still entangled with them to this day).

At that time, we were the organization's armed enforcement agency, responsible for maintaining the balance of power among various factions around the world.

For a time, we acted as the EU's henchmen, preventing the Chinese Federation from unifying continental Europe. For another time, we supported the Grand Duke of Brittany and the complete split from Europe, because the Chinese Federation was on the verge of collapse.