I really don't want to be reborn.
Page 170
"Yeah, what can I do? You're such a siscon."
Kyosuke smiled and reached out to rub her head, but Kirino dodged it: "I've already told you I'm not a child anymore. If you keep touching me, I won't grow taller and will turn into someone like Kanako."
"You're beating around the bush and calling your friend a shorty, you..."
Although he didn't touch her head, he did touch the corner of her mouth and wiped the cake crumbs off her lips with his fingers.
The cake crumbs on a girl's lips represent sweet days.
Their eyes met, then they looked away.
Neither the brother nor sister on the tram spoke.
What appears to be a heartwarming sibling interaction to outsiders actually harbors a subtle rift, which began in August and ended during the school trip in mid-August.
There is no longer any unbridled passion in intimacy.
They both knew the truth.
It's the last few days of November, and the weather is already transitioning into winter. Perhaps in a few days, Chiba's first snow of the year will quietly arrive.
Since this spring, Kirino has had two life consultations, one on games and the other on writing.
At the end of November, the Kosaka siblings began their third major life discussion of the year, which concerned the publication of the younger sister's novel.
Exit from the west exit of Shinjuku Station, walk towards the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building, and circle half of Shinjuku Central Park clockwise until you reach a building emitting a black glow.
Kyosuke glanced down at his phone to check the time: "Perfect timing, we made it in time. Let's go in and talk to that editor, so you don't get scammed by that old bastard."
"My brother seems to know my editor quite well?"
"If nothing unexpected happens, it should be him. Let's go—"
But Kirino stood still, head down.
Kirino's outfit today was more mature than usual, and her light makeup made her look like a professional woman, both formal and stylish.
"...What's wrong? Are you scared?"
Kirino hummed in agreement: "A little."
It's understandable that Kirino would be timid, presumably because she was meeting a strange adult, and in such a serious and formal way.
“I’m right here beside you, you don’t need to be afraid.”
The younger sister's voice was a little hoarse: "But I want to go by myself... I don't need to rely on you for everything."
"..."
His right hand, which he wanted to take her hand with, suddenly froze.
Kirino suddenly looked up, still with that bright and gentle smile: "I remember when my brother came back, he was very happy to tell me that he and Kasumigaoka-senpai had officially become a couple, right?"
"Ah."
"I guess she should have come to Tokyo today too, since her brother kept looking at his phone on the train."
Kyosuke looked at her silently.
My heart aches faintly.
Kirino waved generously and started walking towards the Dengeki Bunko building, her attitude just like that of a good younger sister who's good at playing matchmaker for her brother: "Since we made plans to hang out, we should have a good time! Dates are super important!"
He watched her figure disappear from sight, his eyes filled with the swirling snow, and his heart began to snow.
She walked into the building in a daze, and any expression she had turned into sorrow the moment she looked back.
Kirino Kousaka was touching up her makeup in the restroom, her eyes red-rimmed. She wanted to smile kindly, but she felt that she looked terrible and sad in the mirror.
Is there any sorrow greater than a broken heart?
That's not how it works.
She bit her lip and tilted her head slightly back.
There is no greater sorrow than a heart that refuses to die.
…………
Kasumigaoka Utaha crossed her arms and watched the scene of the brother and sister parting not far away, remaining silent for a long time.
She turned her head and frowned at the blonde girl with pigtails behind her: "Eri, what exactly do you want me to see?"
Ms. Sawamura is still causing trouble today.
Perhaps heartbreak can drive a person mad; she's acting very strangely right now, pointing in that direction: "Kasumigaoka, is there something wrong with your eyes?"
"how?"
Eriri covered her forehead: "Your boyfriend is flirting with his sister! Didn't you see that—they've gotten together! Midori, Kasumigaoka, don't you have any reaction at all?"
"Oh."
"You know what his sister is like!"
“You know, to catch someone cheating, you have to be in bed. It’s actually quite normal for him and his sister to be a little intimate. And—even if they actually slept together, I could understand and wouldn’t mind too much.”
Eriri Sawamura stared at the sky with her mouth agape, revealing her classic horrified expression.
Kasumigaoka Utaha pushed her away and walked back to the warm cafe: "Eri, you don't know the inside story of those siblings. It's very complicated, so complicated that I don't even know how to tell Kyosuke."
"Oh, things are so different after we're officially together. Now you keep calling him Kyosuke—wait, your boyfriend's name is actually quite catchy, Kyosuke Kyosuke Kyosuke Kyosuke..."
"I'll still call you Kousaka-kun from now on; it's a bit embarrassing to just call you by your name."
"Kyosuke Kyousuke Kyosuke Jiji..."
"Eri, do you want to get beaten up?"
The two girls walked back to the coffee shop, and Eriri finally got to the point: "You mean, he himself didn't know about his sister's feelings for him?"
Kasumigaoka gracefully crossed her legs, her demeanor and appearance unchanged from before. After all, only love nourished her and nothing else, so the changes weren't that obvious.
“He must have sensed something, but for some reason he was unwilling to believe it. I could sense that he was reluctant to believe the fact.”
Sawamura sighed, "Ah, what if those siblings really have that idea? Should I go and help them go to England?"
Kasumigaoka raised an eyebrow: "Do you believe I can keep your breasts at this level for the rest of your life?"
Eriri Sawamura gave her usual cold laugh: "I was wrong."
This is also a common occurrence of admitting defeat.
"Alright, we're going to lunch with Ms. Machida. Eriri, would you like to come along?"
"You actually have the appetite to eat at a time like this?"
Eriri suddenly grabbed her hand and pointed outside the glass: "Look, your boyfriend has gone upstairs too. He promised to go shopping with you, and now he's actually gone upstairs."
"..."
"This is catching them in the act... Should we take a picture?"
Kasumigaoka glanced at her boyfriend's retreating figure as he went upstairs and smiled elegantly: "Go catch it for me, good luck."
"Hey! That's 'your' boyfriend!"
"Yes, so I have no doubts about his character and behavior—of course, if you want to be a third party, I have no objection, Eriri."
The woman, stunned by these words, stammered as she looked at her best friend: "You actually... you actually encouraged him to cheat? And the other woman is your best friend???"
"I've never been cheated on, which is such a shame. A college student who hasn't failed any courses isn't a good college student, and a relationship that hasn't involved infidelity isn't a perfect relationship..."
"..."
Shiho stood up and teased Eriri by pinching her little ear: "And it's really no problem if it's you, because I said I love you, baby, Eriri~-chan~"
Eriri Sawamura was horrified. She gave up and finally realized that her brain was not on the same wavelength as this woman's.
Of course, she also admitted that she lost the gamble again.
Kyosuke Kousaka, who was following his sister around the Dengeki Bunko building, received an email from Sawamura.
"She doesn't want to follow you—you've won again. A bet's a bet, and I'll help with the illustrations for Winter Comics."
Expected.
------
I accepted the two hundred razor blades with a guilty conscience, thanking the pure and lovely Uncle Jellyfish.
I'm ashamed because I only updated two chapters yesterday.
I was finalizing the outlines for this volume and the next, and I got so engrossed in writing that I forgot about the third update...
Chapter Two: How to Create More Blossoms Amidst a Prosperity of Flowers
Kyosuke Kosaka looked at himself in the bathroom mirror.
His face was slightly pale.
Perhaps it was also related to the stark white light in the bathroom, which made his black hair appear as black as stockings, and the mirror in the entire bathroom seemed like a door to another world.
His face was hanging on the door.
He knew his own face better than anyone else—proud, frustrated, desperate, numb, stubble-covered, fragmented…
It's become so familiar that I don't want to see it anymore.
He was looking at his own face, trying to see if he could see his sister's shadow in it. Although they were different genders, they were born of the same parents, so did he and Kirino look alike?
The face shape doesn't match.
Their facial features don't have much in common.
He frowned—oh, the way he frowned was exactly the same, looking cold, hard, and irritable.
He's very irritable right now.
Kirino has truly become estranged from herself.
It wasn't too obvious in words, but it was very clear in actions.
At night, she's usually alone in her own bedroom. You won't hear her cheering or yelling because of games, and she won't find any excuse to come to her room.
This behavioral estrangement began after we returned from the school trip.
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