Love, Gun, Cupid

Ice Cave covered his mouth, his face full of disbelief: "My God, unrequited love."

"Personally, I feel that I am more sexually attractive to her than romantically attractive... Wait, why am I telling you this?"

Actually, Ice Cave used her power slightly to make Lin Jiade more friendly towards her, greatly increasing his goodwill towards her. She hoped that when she was still Ice Cave, Lin Jiade would still notice her, instead of seeing her dressed in beautiful clothes and with gorgeous makeup, and still thinking about turning her back into Old Mu.

Just thinking about Lin Jiade's wooden eyes, which refused to utter a single compliment to her, made Bing Dong's stomach ache again. She longed to act like she did in the hospital, to be affectionate with Lin Jiade, to have him take care of her, and to accept his kindness.

But it didn't work. After being settled in the ice cave, she looked at Lin Jiade's family from afar, and at the life he led with his two girlfriends and several women who looked at him strangely. She felt like an outsider. Lin Jiade would never take care of her so gently again.

On her first night in the rented room, the pain of her period returned. This time, she was fully equipped, except for the tall, reliable figure who would be there for her. External things could suppress the pain, but emptiness and coldness pursued her relentlessly.

Although it was immoral, she still imagined Lin Jiade holding her in his arms. Gradually, the feeling of emptiness and coldness dissipated, but in its place, another kind of desire emerged.

I'll turn back into Old Mourinho sooner or later. Lin Jiade is a friend I play football with, and I can't have any distorted thoughts about him.

I am an ice cave, and perhaps I will always be an ice cave, so Lin Jiade is no longer just a friend. He is my support, my protector. Is it wrong for a woman to have desires for a man? Besides, nothing actually happened between us.

Teacher Yang could use Lin Jiade to generate electricity without any guilt, but the ice cave was destined to suffer greatly, and a large part of this suffering was that Lin Jiade looked at her as if he were looking at Old Mu.

She didn't really want to change back, but in front of Lin Jiade, she had to pretend that she really wanted to, because that was what a normal person would think.

Unlike Lin Jiade, who has always been toughened up by strong people since his debut and has maxed out his stress resistance skills, Bingdong is like a player who enjoys playing a fast-paced hack-and-slash game, but gets hacked up in the stock market game, causing her mentality to explode.

Under pressure, many of her thoughts and actions began to distort, so she used a less common skill in the Guardian of the Holy Land's skill tree: Human Charm, to improve her relationship with Lin Jiade with the power of the Holy Land.

The allure of her was clearly effective; Lin Jiade indeed treated her like a girl, rather than having designs on Old Mu. He would glance at her face, at the hem of her skirt, and when he looked away, he would casually talk about his private life.

She abruptly suggested visiting his home to test the effectiveness of human charm, and the result was satisfactory.

In the office, Jianlan watched on the projector as Xuanling carried Lin Jiade, Bingdong, and Ditao to Teacher Yang's house, hoping to get clues about the black cat from there.

Du Juan sat on the table and said with a smile, "They're fighting fiercely. At the current pace, Lin Jiade will soon be able to obtain the heart of the ice cave... all thanks to that human's charm spell."

Sword Orchid said expressionlessly, "This is not my fault. In order to protect my lover, I put a counter-spell defense on him, and she just stood there dumbfounded and cast a spell on him without any protection."

If this were in Brilliant City, and she were my student, such a blatant mistake would get her kicked out of my classroom and out of Brilliant City immediately.

“While I understand your deep resentment towards basic errors in spellcasting, Gladiolus, you’re not Korobochka, you know,” said Cuckoo.

"It doesn't matter, whether Gladiolus is Gladiolus or not, as long as I am Gladiolus in front of my lover, that's enough."

Du Juan returned to the main point: "Since it was the ice cave that was affected, and not Lin Jiade, then why was Lin Jiade willing to treat her like a girl?"

“For the sake of the bigger picture,” Jianlan said. “I said at the police station that in order to unite allies, he needed to consider their feelings, even if it was just an act. I was referring to Kapok, but Lin Jiade applied that principle to the ice cave.”

He wanted to turn the ice cave back into the familiar image of his classmate, but since he needed the ice cave, he pretended to treat her like a girl, being kind and trusting, thus creating the illusion of the ice cave.

Du Juan tugged at the silk thread in her hand, saying, "The Ice Cave must be heartbroken to know the truth. Lin Jiade's place in her heart is probably just as important as mine. Her body, stimulated by menstruation, has even developed female desires."

"Come on," Jianlan sneered. "You use her as a tool to find the Holy Land, and so do I. We are the same kind of beings, both of us who create tragedies without any remorse in order to achieve our goals."

Who cares if the tool lives or dies? All I care about is whether it can help us achieve our goal.

“What if her morality stops her?” Du Juan asked.

"This is the meaning of Teacher Yang's existence. If I'm not mistaken, you've been tampering with her ever since Lin Jiade rescued her from the Mirror Realm last year."

"Oh dear, although I tampered with things, it's a good thing," Du Juan laughed. "If I hadn't fixed her erotic dreams to the passionate scenes with Lin Jiade, how could someone like her possibly understand the pleasures of love and sex?"

Chapter Twenty-Nine: The Monster's Fantasy (3→2)

When Ms. Yang, whose name was called, sneezed, the mimosa tree, which was tending to the flowers and plants, stopped pruning and asked, "Are you alright?"

Teacher Yang took out a napkin and blew her nose: "It's nothing, I probably got up in the middle of the night without putting on my coat last night."

"Then I'll turn the air conditioner temperature up by 2 degrees tonight."

The wards at West Ham Hospital have air conditioning, but Hehuan is sensitive to heat, so even in winter, the air conditioning is only set to around 20°C. Teacher Xiaoyang, on the other hand, is somewhat sensitive to cold, since she is very thin and does not have any supernatural powers to improve her constitution.

After two days of living together, Ms. Yang adapted remarkably well to the hospital ward and her beautiful but melancholic roommate.

Because she considered herself older, and because Hehuan was a student at Sanam Dongdo University, Ms. Yang felt she should take care of her. Little did she know that she was the one Lin Jiade had entrusted to Hehuan to take care of.

Teacher Yang knew He Huan before – because there were rumors in the department that Lin Jiade and He Huan were having an affair, and she had also seen the two of them walking side by side on campus.

Hehuan knew Teacher Yang before—because Lin Jiade always mentioned Yang Xuemeng's name when talking about his university life, and after meeting her, she felt that the woman's gaze towards Lin Jiade was a bit strange.

But the other person was ultimately just a mortal, and they never saw each other again after university, so Hehuan didn't take him to heart. Now, Teacher Yang has reappeared in her life.

When an ordinary person falls into the sights of a supernatural being skilled in divination, it means they no longer have privacy. Hehuan's family has fallen on hard times, and her spirits are not what they used to be. Yesterday, she planned to divine the fate of Teacher Yang, but even today, she still hasn't taken action, instead pruning the withered leaves of the plant.

"If this is a matter of privacy in your industry, you don't have to say it," said Teacher Yang, half-lying on the bed. "Can I learn supernatural powers?"

"In theory, you only need three guarantors and to pass the Magic Registrar's Office's review. However, if you are an adult, then the guarantors must be important figures."

"Are you considered important people?"

"We are all nobody."

"But Lin Jiade only joined your line of work last year."

"Did he even tell you this?" Hehuan looked Teacher Yang up and down. "He was able to pass because one of the recommenders was a friend of mine, and her family has some influence."

Teacher Yang's family is a powerful academic clan, and she's extremely familiar with this system. She said hopefully, "I want to learn magic, anything is fine. It's my business. I want to have the ability to protect myself."

Hehuan fell silent, and Teacher Yang's interest gradually waned. She said, "So it really won't work?"

"No, it's just because I'm a deserter in this line of work. The world of the superhumans is far more cruel than the world my teacher knew."

Take Lin Jiade for example. He only entered the profession last September and may be promoted to intermediate level this January. I started learning magic at the age of 6 and it took me 14 years to reach this level.

His luck is among the strongest I've ever seen in my life; those with good fortune tend to leave a lasting and vibrant mark on their lives.

Teacher Yang understood. Hehuan was subtly telling her that if you don't have talent, don't fantasize about pursuing extraordinary power. This is normal. She had known so many peers since she was a child, and less than one in a hundred of them could get a doctoral degree.

She continued the conversation, asking, "What are your plans next?"

"I, I planned to devote myself to music creation, but as you can see, I am here now."

"Ah, you also hid here to recuperate because of some misfortune. I can understand that feeling, but I think Lin Jiade is a reliable man... I don't mean anything else, I mean he has an incredible power to turn things around, at least I turned my misfortune around."

Don't even think about it, but I had this fantasy when I was young. Back then, my life was controlled by my parents. I followed the path they had planned step by step. It was reassuring, but very boring.

I thought, what if I got involved in some weird and wonderful thing, and then a sexy young man came along to break free from my shackles, defeat the monster, and take me away from my mundane life so we could wander the world together?

"Just like boys fantasize about being liked by beautiful girls, I think it's normal for women to have fantasies too," Hehuan said. "Is wandering the world the end?"

"No, many times I fantasize that I will kill my knight, my hero, my man when he is completely unprepared."

This turn of events was unexpected by Hehuan. She asked, "Kill him? Why?"

"Because I fantasize that I am the monster, and that my parents set shackles in my life to prevent me from harming others, and gave me a life of conformity to disguise me as a harmless person."

However, can the monster within truly be faked? Can humans really accept a monster's views on love? Monsters like heroes, but heroes can naturally be liked by other girls; they each have their own merits and are not monsters.

The hero saving the monster is just one of countless noble deeds in his life. If the monster fails to seize the opportunity, the hero will be taken away by another woman. When the monster and the hero meet again, will the hero forget the monster, and will their relationship end as enemies?

The thought terrified the monster. Her wish was to be with the hero, so she seduced him into mating with her until she was pregnant. Then, at the moment he entered a period of lucidity, she ripped out his heart, mummified his body, and placed him in a coffin.

From then on, carrying the burden of her deceased lover and bearing his child, she began a life of wandering.

"Hmm, why do you have such fantasies?" Hehuan asked.

Ms. Yang scratched her head sheepishly: "Back then I was a bit immature and liked stories with tragic endings. I didn't actually believe in the Cinderella and Prince story, so I thought Cinderella had to take all sorts of extreme measures to keep the prince's heart."

"Now, it's gotten to the point where I'd feel ashamed even in my dreams. Don't follow my example. While you're young, passionate, and energetic, go and have a proper relationship with the person you like."

Ms. Yang looked down at her shadow and sighed: "At my age, dating is no longer an option, so I have to go on blind dates. Blind dates are where both parties examine each other's conditions to see if they can build a family full of friendship."

“My situation is quite the opposite,” Hehuan said. “My marriage was controlled by my parents from the beginning. After the family incident, I gained the freedom to marry… But without my family background, who would love me? Those who claimed to be pursuing me were only after my family background.”

I have now fully experienced the meaning of the phrase "the fickleness of human relationships."

Chapter Thirty: Face Hole

Two women, each with their own unhappiness in their relationships, simultaneously thought of the same name. At that moment, Lin Jiade sneezed repeatedly in the car, and Bingdong, seeing this, handed her a tissue.

Lin Jiade drew a card, and his body naturally leaned towards the ice cave. The hot breath came from it. The ice cave turned its head slightly, tucked the hair behind its ear, and said, "Are we going to see Teacher Yang's parents?"

"Under what pretext should we meet?" Lin Jiade asked.

"Whatever, I mainly want to see if there are any problems with her parents."

Lin Jiade exclaimed in surprise, "That monster has the ability to spread from person to person?"

“I don’t know…” the ice cave said. “In all these years as a guardian, I have only followed the captain’s instructions and acted according to her requirements. I have never taken the initiative to learn about anything.”

"Really? Looks like I need to talk to your captain, but she's probably busy arguing with my girlfriend... Don't look so apologetic. I'm not forcing you to abandon your comrades. You've been together for so many years, you must have a strong bond."

"Yes, when I first became a girl, I dressed in a very inappropriate way. They were the ones who taught me how to dress like a girl. I was the youngest guardian in the team. At first, I was just helping them out. When I was sixteen, I was assigned to guard the weakest node."

"Where is the person from before?" Lin Jiade asked.

"She graduated."

"graduate?"

"When the guardians of the holy land die in battle, are wounded, or do not want to continue, the captain will hold a ceremony for them to reclaim their memories and powers, allowing them to return to the city as normal people."

Then, I played the mowing game once a month... until the punishment of the Holy Land came, my chest was pierced, and I woke up in pain and began to think about what the Holy Land is, what the power and mission of the Holy Land is, and what the guardians of the Holy Land are to the Holy Land.

I once thought I was a hero who protected the city in the darkness…

"In my opinion, you are."

"No, I'm just a tool, a pathetic and ignorant person... um."

Lin Jiade placed his hand on Bingdong's head, ruffling Bingdong's hair. Bingdong reached out to grab Lin Jiade's hand with one hand and reached for Lin Jiade's head with the other.

"Stop it, stop it, it's too much trouble to comb it again!"

Ice Cave gave Lin Jiade a reproachful look, but when she saw how Lin Jiade's hair looked after she had messed it up, she laughed.

The car was parked nearby. Because the fight that occurred near Teacher Yang's house was explained as an electrical and gas accident, the media, curious passersby, and online celebrities gathered in droves. The first two were fine, but the last group of people doing live streaming, in order to become famous and keep the audience in the live stream to send gifts, behaved in a way that made people frown.

"So, they're demonstrating how humans degenerate?"

The warbling of a reed warbler sounded from behind. Lin Jiade turned around and saw the warbler wearing sunglasses and a hat, munching on a candied hawthorn. For some reason, Lin Jiade felt that her clothes looked familiar... Wasn't that the outfit she wore in the ice cave that morning?

The warbler answered quickly: "It was a chance encounter, a chance encounter! You're all not home during the day, I'm so bored, so I'm just wandering around here."

Where is the cuckoo?

"She went to see Jianlan again, supposedly to mediate something. I went to play with Jasmine, but she ignored me."

"How can she play with you at school..."

Lin Jiade felt that when Wei Ying had lost her supernatural powers, raising her was no different from raising a cat; he had to spend time with her, otherwise she would feel lonely.