Siheyuan (traditional courtyard house): Starting with the Korean War, returning home to take charge

He Yuzhu couldn't say when the rumors started.

He was busy with things in Tianjin those days, and when he got back he would just collapse into bed, not paying attention to the gossip in the yard. By the time he realized what was happening, things had already blown up.

For three consecutive days, He Yushui came home from school without eating and just lay down as soon as she entered the house.

On the third night, He Yuzhu knocked on her door and saw her lying on the bed with her pillow soaked.

"Rain, what's wrong?"

She didn't move.

He Yuzhu sat down on the edge of the bed and turned her shoulders. Her eyes were swollen, and there were still tear stains on her face.

"elder brother……"

Her voice cracked as soon as she opened her mouth.

"They said...that you're a bad person."

He Yuzhu was stunned for a moment.

"Who said that?"

He Yushui clutched the corner of the blanket, her knuckles turning white.

"The people in the hospital. And... your classmates from school. They say you deserted on the battlefield, that you got your position through connections, that you..."

She couldn't continue, buried her face in the blanket, and began to sob softly.

He Yuzhu sat there, placed his hand on her back, and gently patted her.

"Rain, am I a deserter, brother?"

He Yushui shook her head.

"That settles it."

He Yushui didn't say anything; her shoulders were still trembling.

He Yuzhu found out the source early the next morning.

Uncle Yan Bugui was watering the flowers in the yard when he saw Zhu Zi come out. He looked around and leaned over to whisper, "Zhu Zi, that woman from the Jia family has been gossiping about you everywhere these past few days. You'd better watch out."

He Yuzhu nodded.

At noon, the courtyard was filled with the aroma of food. Jia Zhangshi brought out a basin to wash clothes and saw He Yuzhu sitting at the door with a bowl in his hand. Her face immediately lit up with a smile.

"Hey, Director He, eating at home today?"

The smile was so forced that it seemed fake. He Yuzhu didn't reply.

Madam Jia wasn't annoyed. She put the basin on the ground, rubbed her clothes a couple of times, then looked up as if talking to herself: "When someone gets promoted too quickly, the people below start to gossip. We don't know if they're truly capable or if they have other connections..."

He Yuzhu put down the bowl and stood up.

"Aunt Jia, let's chat."

Jia Zhangshi paused in her movements, looked up, the smile still on her face, but her eyes had changed.

"What would we talk about? I wouldn't dare talk to the factory manager. If someone says I'm gossiping, they'll arrest me."

He Yuzhu walked up to her.

"Do you have any evidence for what you just said?"

Jia Zhangshi threw the wet clothes into the basin, and the smile on her face finally came to an end.

"What evidence? What did I say? I said you got promoted quickly, is that illegal? Ask everyone, is it okay to say that?"

She raised her voice, and people in the courtyard began to peek out. Yan Bugui stood at his door with a bowl in his hand, Liu Haizhong came out with a cigarette in his mouth, and Aunt Erda, holding a child, also came over to look.

When Jia Zhangshi saw that there were many people, she sat down on the ground, slapped her thigh, and started wailing.

"My God! My child and I were just doing laundry, and he came over to interrogate me! What did I say? I didn't say a single wrong word! He's bullying us! He's taking advantage of the fact that we're all alone!"

She wailed loudly, but hardly shed a tear.

Liu Haizhong glanced at it twice, then shrank back into the house. Yan Bugui took a step forward, about to speak, when a hand reached out from behind him—his wife tugged at his sleeve. Yan Bugui opened his mouth, then closed it again. Aunt Er glanced at He Yuzhu, then lowered her head to soothe the child, and went inside as well.

No one spoke in the courtyard.

He Yuzhu stood there, listening to her howl. His hands clenched into fists, then relaxed.

He remembered something. Four years ago, near the 38th parallel, there was a new recruit, surnamed Chen, from Henan, only nineteen years old. It was his first time on the front lines. Hearing the artillery fire, he crouched down, refusing to look up. His squad leader kicked and yelled at him, but it was no use. Later, when the unit retreated, he fell behind and never returned.

After the war, some people called him a deserter. He Yuzhu didn't say anything. But when he couldn't sleep at night, he would think, if that child hadn't died, where would he be now? Was he being cursed behind his back like he was?

Jia Zhangshi was still wailing.

He Yuzhu took a step forward.

Have you ever seen me fight a war?

Jia Zhangshi's wailing paused for a moment.

Have you seen what I looked like in North Korea?

She opened her mouth, but couldn't reply.

"You've never seen it. You've never been on a battlefield, never been shot, never lay prone in the snow for three days and three nights at minus forty degrees Celsius. You know nothing, yet you dare to call me a deserter?"

When He Yuzhu said this, his voice trembled for a fleeting moment. It was so brief that he didn't even notice it himself.

But his hands clenched tightly.

Jia Zhangshi stepped back and rubbed her bottom on the ground twice.

"I...I heard it from someone else..."

"Who told you that?"

Jia Zhangshi opened her mouth again, but no words came out.

The courtyard fell silent.

Yan Bugui coughed lightly and pushed up his glasses: "Um... Old Jia's family, you can't say things like that without evidence."

Jia Zhangshi's face turned a deep purplish-red. She got up, dusted herself off, and carried the basin home.

As he walked to the door, he turned back and glanced at He Yuzhu.

That look in his eyes was exactly the same as the one Zhou Zhiming had on the day he was arrested.

That night, He Yushui didn't eat again.

He Yuzhu sat down on the edge of her bed with a bowl in his hand. She turned over and faced away from him.

"Rain, have something to eat."

I'm not hungry.

He Yuzhu placed the bowl on the bedside table.

There was a moment of silence.

"Rain, I have something to tell you."

He Yushui didn't move.

"Would you like to... go to school somewhere else?"

He Yushui turned over and looked at him.

"Where to?"

He Yuzhu thought for a moment: "There's a place in the mountains. There's a school there too, but it's quiet and not crowded."

He Yushui looked at him, her eyes reddening again.

"Brother, are you not going to let me go?"

He Yuzhu was stunned for a moment.

"no."

He Yushui sat up and grabbed his sleeve.

"Then why send me away?"

He Yuzhu didn't say anything.

He looked out the window at the dark courtyard and at the lights still on at the Jia family's house across the street.

He asked himself: Why did I send her away?

Was it because they were afraid she would be hurt by those words again?

Or am I afraid that one day she will look at me with those eyes?

He couldn't explain it.

He Yushui buried her face in his arm, her voice muffled.

"Brother, I'm not leaving. I'm staying here. I won't listen to anything they say."

He Yuzhu placed his hand on the back of her head.

"it is good."

Outside the window, the moon peeked out from behind the clouds, illuminating the courtyard in a white light.

The lights in the Jia family's house went out.

He Yuzhu sat by the bed and waited until Yushui fell asleep before getting up and leaving. He took the cold rice back to the kitchen, where there was still half a pot of hot water and the stove was still warm.

He didn't fall down.

I stood there for a while, placing my hand on the edge of the stove, feeling the lingering warmth.