Healing Doctor

Chapter 780 My mind is in turmoil

The next morning, Ji Xiang got up and ran a half marathon in the hotel gym.

After washing up in his room, Ji Xiang went outside and saw Zhao Zhe waiting outside the door.

"Brother Zhao, why don't you come in and sit down? Standing outside... there's no need to be so polite," Ji Xiang asked.

"I went for a walk this morning and saw you running by yourself at the gym," Zhao Zhe said with considerable admiration. "Even if I went back to being 20, I wouldn't have this much stamina. Xiao Ji, your body is amazing! But speaking of which, are gyms open 24 hours a day? What if they're not?"

"Five-star hotels are open 24 hours a day. If they're not, I can file a complaint. Besides, I asked before booking the hotel," Ji Xiang replied.

"You're in really good health. You always say that your silly roe deer is exhausted from your walks every day. I didn't believe it before, but now I really do."

"No wonder you don't feel tired even after performing so many surgeries every day. And when Dr. Meng is on duty, you can even go to the emergency room and stay up all night with him. No wonder, no wonder," Zhao Zhe rambled on.

"It's alright. Did you see patient Li Muzhi yesterday?" Ji Xiang asked.

After getting off the plane yesterday, Deng Chaohong and Zhao Zhe went to see the patient. Ji Xiang, out of curiosity, followed Lin Jiu to find the old man of the Lin family.

Unexpectedly, what the old man from the Lin family brought to Ji Xiang was not gossip, but a magical experience.

After experiencing it, Ji Xiang looks back at the current medical system and immediately finds it utterly uninteresting.

"I went there, but the patient's condition wasn't very good."

"Oh? Are you worried about your recovery?" Ji Xiang asked.

The patient is 29 years old, in good health, and his problem is his Achilles tendon, which will not affect his vital signs.

Zhao Zhe's assessment is flawed; it's most likely a psychological issue for the patient.

"Hmm." Zhao Zhe nodded. "It's like... I had a colleague before who graduated from a prestigious university. After graduation, he had already been admitted to graduate school, but his family was poor and he was anxious to earn money to support his family, so he returned to work in Yuanliao City."

"His surgical skills are top-notch. Even a simple appendectomy is performed several levels above others. The surgery is incredibly meticulous, and his patients recover much faster than other patients."

They are indeed very skilled, especially in simple minor surgeries, where their expertise is truly evident.

Ji Xiang nodded, indicating his understanding.

As they talked, the two went to the hotel restaurant to have breakfast.

"But then something happened. A patient's family member came in with a knife. The patient wasn't his, but the family member came straight at him because he was sitting near the door."

"As a result, many tendons in his right hand were severed, and his function did not recover well. After he recovered somewhat, he was afraid to perform surgery on himself, so he came to me. I knew what he was thinking, so we went into surgery together."

"When he was down there, he only had functional impairment, but when he went on stage, his hands started shaking so badly that he couldn't even hold the knife steady."

Ji Xiang listened to Zhao Zhe rambling on and breathed a sigh of relief.

There have been many similar cases, and the common thread is that whenever this happens, the doctor's career is over.

At the very least, a surgeon's career can be declared over.

In some ways, surgeons and athletes have similarities.

Especially the doctor Zhao Zhe mentioned, whose hands trembled after going on stage, probably because he wanted to return to his previous level, but he couldn't reach it no matter what he did. The accumulation of negative feedback led to tension and the secretion of a large amount of hormones.

This is no way.

"The patient's name is Li Muzhi, 29 years old. He looks like a smart young man, but his complexion is very bad." Zhao Zhe continued to ramble on, "After seeing Professor Deng, he kept asking if he could participate in this year's National Games and the Diamond League, and kept asking if it could be guaranteed 100%."

"It's like you don't understand what I'm saying. Xiao Ji, how can we doctors possibly say things that are 100% accurate?"

"Indeed." Ji Xiang sighed.

He has experienced the world of football players firsthand and understands their day-to-day, year-to-year training, all for the sake of their dreams.

But humans are so fragile that a single oversight can lead to irreversible damage to the body.

Zhao Zhe kept rambling on about Li Mu's unease and anxiety when he saw him yesterday, and even eating couldn't stop him from talking.

A while later, Deng Chaohong arrived.

He got up relatively late, while Tang Yan was probably still sleeping in. They didn't get up until almost time, quickly washed up, ate, and went to the hospital together for surgery.

"Professor Deng, how is the patient?" Ji Xiang asked politely.

"It's alright. The X-ray shows that the Achilles tendon injury is less severe than Neymar's. I think the surgery will be fine," Deng Chaohong gave an affirmative answer.

Ji Xiang had already seen the images through a remote consultation at the Second Affiliated Hospital, so he knew what was going on and didn't ask too many questions.

When the time came, Li Muzhi's coach came to pick up the medical team.

Li Muzhi's coach, surnamed Zhai, was a tall, muscular, middle-aged man with a belly.

It's clear that Coach Zhai must have been incredibly strong and robust when he was young.

"Professor Deng, thank you for your hard work later." Coach Zhai held Deng Chaohong's hand, bent down slightly, and said repeatedly.

Coach Zhai said politely and tried to pull his hand away, but Coach Zhai's grip was very strong, and he held Deng Chaohong's hand tightly and wouldn't let go.

Deng Chaohong tried to shake himself off, but his strength was no match for Coach Zhai's, and he couldn't break free at all.

"Professor Deng, whether Xiao Li's efforts over the years will bear fruit depends on your surgery. This child has really had a tough time. I've been taking care of him since he was little and watching him grow up little by little."

"Xiao Li was talented, but he was mentally unstable when he was young. He would always underperform in major competitions. After each competition, I would give him a good beating. Thinking about it now..."

Coach Zhai held Deng Chaohong's hand and rambled on illogically, even more so than Zhao Zhe.

Ji Xiang could even sense that Coach Zhai was extremely nervous; his hand holding Deng Chaohong's was trembling slightly.

What he was saying now sounded more like he was talking to himself in a state of nervousness, and he didn't notice Deng Chaohong's increasingly unpleasant expression at all.

"Coach Zhai, don't worry, we will do our best." Deng Chaohong had no choice but to pat Coach Zhai's hand to comfort him.

"The child has worked so hard, who could have imagined that things would turn out like this when they were about to achieve results?" Coach Zhai said, tears streaming down his face.

He is far more nervous and anxious than the average patient's family member.

"Coach Zhai..."

"Professor Deng, please help me. Whether Xiao Li can recover depends on you." Coach Zhai said the same thing.

Whether it's Deng Chaohong, Zhao Zhe, or Ji Xiang, they all understand.

Before many surgeries, patients' families would hold the doctor's hand and say the same thing.

Coach Zhai was in such good health that Deng Chaohong's hand was squeezed painfully.

"Coach Zhai, if you keep squeezing, my bones will break, and I'm afraid I won't be able to have surgery today," Deng Chaohong said helplessly to Coach Zhai.

Coach Zhai paused for a moment, then released his grip, wiped his face with his sleeve, and looked embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"Coach Zhai, you're too nervous," Deng Chaohong reassured him. "We'll do our best in the surgery, don't worry, we'll definitely give it our all."

"I was indeed too nervous and lost my composure a bit. Please don't mind."

Deng Chaohong's hands were red from clenching his fists. He sighed and kept rubbing his right hand with his left to ease the pain.

Ji Xiang, Zhao Zhe, and Tang Yan rode in one car, while Coach Zhai pulled Deng Chaohong into another car.

"You're pretty nervous." Zhao Zhe smiled after getting into the car.

"There's nothing we can do. So many years of hard work, all gone because of one injury. Who could accept that?" Ji Xiang sighed deeply, recalling the various experiences he had when he felt the same way and the psychological pressure he was under at the time.

When he saw Coach Zhai, he seemed to see "himself" as he fell to the ground injured in the face of a flying tackle from his teammate behind him.

At that moment, it felt like the sky had fallen.

During the time he was injured, Ji Xiang's mindset changed countless times. He was no longer strong or fearless. He was anxious every day and couldn't even sleep soundly.

Ji Xiang even clearly remembers that his hair had turned completely white before the surgery when he was in his twenties.

It looked like countless snowflakes had fallen.

The anxiety and confusion in my heart are beyond words.

Therefore, he understood Coach Zhai's loss of composure, a feeling that even Zhao Zhe, as the former head coach, could not fully comprehend.

When I arrived at the hospital, there were several people standing at the main entrance.

Upon seeing Deng Chaohong get out of the car, the two people, who appeared to be the patient's parents, grabbed Deng Chaohong and cried incessantly.

Alas, although Ji Xiang could hear what they were saying, he didn't listen attentively.

Ji Xiang understood the patients' families' mindset very well; at this point, their tension had reached its peak.

When Ji Xiang saw the patient's mother's legs buckle as if she were about to kneel down before Deng Chaohong, startling him and causing him to quickly step aside, he felt an overwhelming pang of sorrow.

Just like my parents, although they seem indifferent to my development, they knew about my surgery earlier than I did, and even found an actuary.

In a world where everyone feels the same way, Ji Xiang has experienced a lot. Although he is used to it, he felt a little strange at this moment.

Ji Xiang tried his best not to look at the pleas of the patient's family. Every time he looked, he felt a pain in his heart and his mind was in turmoil.

The surgery must be done properly.

Although Ji Xiang puts his heart and soul into every surgery, the tension of the patients' families and coaches still affects him, stirring up memories he has accumulated from times when he felt the same way.

Finally, the patient's family members were persuaded to leave by the director of the local hospital, and everyone went to the ward to take a look at the patient.

Li Muzhi, 29 years old, because...

Ji Xiang could recite the patient's medical records word for word, and he also knew the relevant imaging data and physical examination results by heart.

But upon seeing the patient, Ji Xiang fell silent.

Li Muzhi looked as haggard as "himself" in the same situation.

Although he is only 29 years old, his hair is already completely white.

In the field of sprinting, 29 years old is considered a veteran in his prime, but Li Muzhi is actually still a young man.

Seeing that his hair had already turned white, Ji Xiang understood what Li Muzhi had been through recently.

Ji Xiang understood all of this.

Having experienced all of this himself, Ji Xiang took a deep breath and clenched his fist tightly.

It was as if he was facing his former "self".

"Dr. Ji Xiang." Lin Jiuze's voice suddenly appeared.

"What's wrong, Dr. Lin?"

"Are you nervous today? I feel like your demeanor is different from usual," Lin Jiu asked.

"No," Ji Xiang replied calmly.

He couldn't share his own experiences with Lin Jiu, and even if he did, he figured others would find him noisy and would never feel the same way.

It's pointless to say anything; I might as well just brush it off.

"I feel like you're not in a good mood today," Lin Jiu muttered to himself, puzzled.

"Did you chat with the old man for a while yesterday?" Ji Xiang asked in return.

"Mm." Lin Jiu responded with a soft "Mm," then fell silent before smiling broadly. "Thank you, Dr. Ji Xiang."

"You're welcome. Your grandfather is a wonderful man. I'll visit him again when I have the chance," Ji Xiang said.

The old man of the Lin family is indeed a remarkable person; this is Ji Xiang's sincere opinion.

After chatting for a while to distract himself, Ji Xiang's emotions calmed down a bit.

He silently watched Li Muzhi, whose gray hair, which did not belong to his age, seemed to be silently telling Ji Xiang something.

Deng Chaohong performed a physical examination, chatted with Li Muzhi for a few minutes, told him not to be nervous, and waved to begin surgery.

The anesthesiologists, nurses, and attending physicians took Li Muzhi away, while the director of the local hospital accompanied Deng Chaohong to the operating room.

With the director of the higher-level hospital accompanying him the whole way, Deng Chaohong felt like he was in a dream.

Although both the Second Affiliated Hospital and this hospital are tertiary-level Class A hospitals, this hospital ranks among the top ten nationwide, while the Second Affiliated Hospital lags far behind.

The hospital director's solicitousness made Deng Chaohong feel extremely uneasy.

Ji Xiang followed Deng Chaohong to change his clothes, but he didn't hear a word of what Deng Chaohong and the director were saying.

In Ji Xiang's mind, his past experiences came to mind bit by bit.

At the time, I didn't think much of it; I just took things one step at a time. And I had a goal at the time—to lead the national team to the World Cup, and even lift the trophy.

But after the tempering and accumulation of time, when encountering patients who share the same plight, all sorts of emotions that were once in "my" mind resurfaced.

"Did something happen when Dr. Ji Xiang went home last night?" Lin Jiu asked Zhao Zhe quietly, noticing that something was wrong with Ji Xiang.

Zhao Zhe was startled, but quickly recovered, shook his head, looked at the ground and replied softly, "Nothing, I saw Xiao Ji go to the gym to run a half marathon early this morning. He's really in great shape. When I was young, I was exhausted after running 5,000 meters, but Xiao Ji ran a half marathon without even breaking a sweat."

"Why do I feel like Dr. Ji Xiang is acting differently than usual? What happened?"

"Xiao Ji left with you yesterday. Did you encounter anything strange? I'm fine here. I guess the problem lies with you." Zhao Zhe asked casually.

Lin Jiu felt slightly embarrassed by Zhao Zhe's calm demeanor.

The two whispered a few words, but ultimately came to no conclusion.

Zhao Zhe also felt that Ji Xiang was acting strangely today.

If it were any other young doctor, Zhao Zhe would think it was due to nervousness.

After all, it's not unusual for anyone to be nervous about having a reverse scalpel performed at a higher-level hospital.

But Ji Xiang doesn't.

In the beginning, Qin Chu, the boss, tried to win over Ji Xiang, but Ji Xiang didn't tolerate him at all. When the school started, he even threw an A4 sheet of paper at Qin Chu's face.

This young man has an exceptionally strong mental fortitude.

Now, the director of the local hospital is very kind, even showing a bit of a learning attitude, a stark contrast to the tense atmosphere he displayed when facing Qin Chu, the boss.

That shouldn't be the case.

Perhaps he was overthinking things, Zhao Zhe finally gave himself an excuse and a reason.

Upon arriving at the operating room, Zhao Zhe quickly began disinfecting the equipment.

Ji Xiang didn't wait below; instead, he disinfected the area with Zhao Zhe.

He was very careful, working from the inside out, and every operation was extremely meticulous.

Seeing Li Muzhi's white hair out of the corner of his eye, Ji Xiang felt a little uncomfortable. As he turned around, a circulating nurse happened to pass by, and Ji Xiang bumped into her without noticing.

"Clang~"

The disinfection tray landed on the ground.

The atmosphere in the operating room suddenly became incredibly awkward.

The circulating nurse instinctively wanted to swear, but remembering that this was an operation performed by an external specialist, she swallowed her words.

In the operating room, the circulating nurse is a rather special case.

Ji Xiang was also embarrassed; his mind was a little flustered.

The repeated use of the superior doctor's gaze instilled in Ji Xiang a subconscious tendency to act with absolute authority.

Just as Ji Xiang was about to reprimand the circulating nurse, he realized that he had indeed acted somewhat inappropriately today, and swallowed back what he was about to say.

Staring at each other, Ji Xiang reacted quickly, bowing slightly, "Teacher, I'm sorry, I'll go wash my hands again."

"It's my fault, I'm sorry."

The two apologized, and the matter was considered closed.

Lin Jiu watched in surprise as Ji Xiang went to scrub his hands again. What he had just witnessed confirmed his guess—Ji Xiang was indeed not in good form today.

When they were at the Second Affiliated Hospital, Lin Jiu and Ji Xiang had worked together on many surgeries and nothing like this had ever happened before.

Although Ji Xiang is young, he is a seasoned veteran in the operating room, always methodical and never causing trouble.

What's wrong with me today?!

Ji Xiang also realized his emotional problem, and he started scrubbing his hands again.

Listening to the rushing water, Ji Xiang tried to calm himself down. He took a deep breath, trying to quell the anxiety deep within him.

Every time he felt empathy, it was like a bottle of fine wine, and Ji Xiang never expected it to have such a strong aftereffect.

I didn't feel this when I performed the surgery on Neymar.

After swiping his hands again, Zhao Zhe had already disinfected them.

Ji Xiang felt a little awkward wearing the lead apron; something was definitely off about him today.

Operation,

Start.

However, Ji Xiang felt something was amiss when he started working with Deng Chaohong to open the skin.

His hands, like Coach Zhai's, were trembling slightly.

Oh shit!

Ji Xiang cursed inwardly.

Holding his breath and concentrating, not like entering a system operating room, Ji Xiang needed to focus all his attention.

But the more he did this, the more distorted his surgical movements became.

"Huh?" Deng Chaohong also noticed something was wrong. He looked up at Ji Xiang, and although he didn't say much, he secretly groaned in his heart.

Young master, don't let me down at this crucial moment!

"It's alright, Teacher Deng." Ji Xiang squinted his eyes and returned Deng Chaohong's smile.

Director Liu of the local hospital stood behind, wearing a lead apron, watching the surgery.

"Director, is this all you've got?" a professor in charge of the group said dismissively. "Your skin-opening skills aren't even as good as the doctoral students under my supervision."

"Keep your voice down," Director Liu said in a low voice.

"Damn it, even if you don't go abroad for surgery, you can't have a doctor from a lower-level hospital perform the surgery. This is utter nonsense."

Director Liu didn't speak, but instead turned his head and gave the professor in charge of the group a look, signaling him not to say anything.

"Sigh." The professor in charge of the group sighed.

Although they spoke softly, Deng Chaohong could still hear them.

It was like a series of slaps to Deng Chaohong's face.

But Deng Chaohong was helpless. The surgery was originally performed by Ji Xiang, and he had seen over a hundred cases but still couldn't understand Ji Xiang's technique.

Even if you try to imitate someone poorly, you can only achieve a maximum of 3% of the result; it's impossible to do more than that.

The more Deng Chaohong thought about it, the more worried and anxious he became. He couldn't understand why Ji Xiang would suddenly mess up.

He was fine when he ate breakfast this morning. Ji Xiang wasn't sick and performed the surgery with ease. Suddenly, he lost his composure and couldn't even coordinate the dishes properly.

This is no joke!

If it were someone else, Deng Chaohong would at least have said a few words to reprimand them.

But with Ji Xiang standing next to him, Deng Chaohong didn't know what to say.

Well, let's leave it at that. We can only hope that Xiao Ji recovers quickly on her own.

But is it possible?

Deng Chaohong could only take on more work to reduce the workload for Ji Xiang.

The skin was opened, blunt dissection was performed, and the surgical field was somewhat worse than usual.

Deng Chaohong knew very well what Ji Xiang usually did during surgery. Without the assistance of such a capable assistant, he could only achieve this much even if he did his best.

But the most crucial step was coordinating with Lin Jiuze's procedure to suture the Achilles tendon.

Deng Chaohong understood the principle behind this step and had read through all of Ji Xiang's papers repeatedly, even to the point of memorizing them perfectly.

But if it really came to that, Deng Chaohong still couldn't bring himself to do it.

Meanwhile, Lin Jiu and Zhao Zhe have already begun super-selection and image creation.

On the imaging, the tiny, barely visible capillaries in the Achilles tendon showed faint contrast, but Deng Chaohong had no idea what to do next.

He looked up at Ji Xiang.

Ji Xiang was watching the video, and after making a judgment, he reached out.

With the needle holder in his hand, Ji Xiang prepared to suture.

However, just as the needle was about to fall, Ji Xiang realized something was wrong. The position was off, and his hand was unsteady.

Li Muzhi's white hair and his own experience of turning white overnight crashed into the depths of his heart like waves.

Ji Xiang's strong will was already crumbling.

What's going on? Ji Xiang stopped what he was doing, closed his eyes slightly, and, ignoring Lin Jiu's presence, held his breath and entered the system's operating room.

"Is it even feasible?" the professor leading the group said disdainfully.

This time, he didn't lower his voice intentionally, and Deng Chaohong heard it clearly.

"Professor Deng, why aren't you stitching it up?" Director Liu also noticed that Ji Xiang was performing the crucial part of the surgery.

When Ji Xiang stopped moving, Deng Chaohong did not continue.

Is this taking a student to perform surgery? Director Liu was very unhappy.

"Uh..." Deng Chaohong paused for a moment.

"Professor Deng, you are aware of the patient's condition. It seems inappropriate to have a student perform this kind of surgery."

(End of this chapter)