The Little Fox's Immortal Cultivation Encyclopedia

"Trouble? What trouble?" Matchmaker Liu's smile froze. "What do you mean? What trouble could possibly befall Master Wu?"

"It's not that I don't want to say, it's just that I can't say." The fox sighed and walked away without looking back.

Matchmaker Wang glanced over with a smug look and sneered, "I knew it! You'd get your comeuppance sooner or later for doing things like this."

The matchmaker glared back and hurriedly ran into the house.

Inside the house, the wealthy Mr. Wu was completely unaware of the situation and was still arguing with his daughter: "Then why don't you marry him?"

Ms. Wu did not respond, but walked to the table and spread out a piece of paper.

"What are you writing?"

"There was a mistake in writing the wedding invitation, and the marriage vows between Xu and Cheng are as firm as iron." She picked up her brush, dipped it in ink, and wrote, "I admire Mr. Xu's loyalty and E'niang's deep affection, and I do not wish to take away someone else's love. This marriage is hereby called off."

"Nonsense! If word gets out that you've said that, how will you ever get married? What will everyone in town say about you?"

Master Wu suddenly stood up, about to say something more, but felt a wave of dizziness. He rubbed his head, swayed a few times, and then fell straight down.

"Sir, the master said..." Matchmaker Liu pushed open the door, then froze, only one thought in her mind:

"Sir, isn't this 'recently' a bit too fast?"

……

Master Wu opened his eyes groggily. Thick fog swirled around him, damp and cold, seeping into his bones.

He instinctively pulled his clothes tighter and looked around, but saw nothing except for a faint melody coming through the fog.

The music was shrill and noisy, and the melody was harsh and mocking.

Master Wu hesitated for a moment, then walked toward the direction of the music. After taking only a few steps, a path suddenly appeared beneath his feet. Feeling uneasy, he gritted his teeth and continued forward.

After an unknown amount of time, a courtroom appeared before them, with a plaque hanging directly above it.

"Tao County Government Office..."

A thick fog suddenly swept in, obscuring the signboard. When Master Wu looked again, he saw three large characters written on it.

The Swift Reporting Division.

Before Master Wu could react, two little devils in black clothes appeared out of nowhere and grabbed his arms from the left and right.

"You, surnamed Wu, your affair has been exposed." Without saying a word, they dragged Master Wu into the hall.

Master Wu's legs went weak, and he was almost dragged into the hall: "Wh-what is it?"

"Stop talking nonsense, you'll find out when you get inside."

The room was brightly lit, with a brazier in the corner, but the light from it was a greenish glow, and stacks of yellow paper were burning inside.

A man sat in the hall, dressed in a bright red official robe and a black gauze hat, looking very imposing, but his furry fox face was expressionless.

Behind the fox-faced priest stood two little devils, one holding a book and the other holding a scale for weighing pork.

"mighty--"

Several little devils wielding stern sticks slammed their fists into the ground. Master Wu, who was already unsteady on his feet, was forced to his knees by the sound of the blows.

"Master Wu, do you know your crime?" the fox-faced priest spoke, his voice overpowering the murderous aura that filled the hall.

Sweating profusely, Master Wu kowtowed repeatedly, pleading, "This humble one...this humble one does not know what crime I have committed..."

"Don't know?" The fox-faced priest sneered, beckoning to the hideous-looking imp behind him: "Su Yinchai, bring the booklet!"

The little devil stepped forward, opened the book, and read aloud at the top of his lungs:

"Master Wu, a native of Tao County, on the 22nd day of the eighth month of the 21st year of Jinghe, broke the engagement between Xu Sheng and E Niang, intending to separate the human and the ghost couple. This is his first crime!"

"To impose one's own wishes on a woman and force a marriage against her will is a double crime!"

"To falsely claim to be a fox spirit, to spread divine pronouncements, and to confuse the public—these are the three crimes!"

"Thump!"

A drumbeat suddenly sounded from somewhere, making Master Wu's heart pound. His lips trembled, and it took him a long time to squeeze out a sentence: "I, I went to the fox spirit to draw a fortune stick, no, no, I'm not making this up..."

"Ha, still trying to argue?" The fox-faced priest said sternly. "Su Yinchai, bring the scales!"

The imp carrying the scales stepped forward and said, "Sir, according to the rules, those who commit crimes should have their hearts and livers weighed on this scale to see how much their sins weigh."

The other kid nodded: "Weigh the heart and liver, then fry them in oil. Once they're thoroughly fried, take them out and weigh them again. We're done when they're ready to eat... when they're no longer weighable."

Master Wu's face turned deathly pale, and he almost fainted.

The fox-faced priest waved his hand: "No rush. Let's take him to see what happened to the last person who dared to presume to know the meaning of immortality."

The two little devils dragged Master Wu to the back of the house. There were several pillars there, one of which had a man covered in white fur tied to it, and a huge black pig tied to the pillar next to him.

The black pig grunted and hissed, took a few steps back, then charged forward, its head slamming solidly into the man.

The man was knocked forward and pulled back by the iron chain. A few of his goose feathers were knocked off, but they grew back immediately.

The black pig retreated, caught its breath, and charged forward again.

Master Wu trembled, feeling as if the black pig was not hitting the man, but rather hitting his own heart again and again.

The little devil kindly explained, "This one also falsely conveyed the fox spirit's decree in his previous life. He was sentenced to be run over by pigs every day for a thousand years."

Suddenly, Wu Yuanwai seemed to find a surge of strength, broke free from the two boys' hands, and scrambled back into the hall.

"I know I was wrong! I will never dare to do it again! Please, Your Excellency, have mercy! Please, Your Excellency, have mercy!"

The fox priest looked at him and sighed, "Fine, you're not terribly evil, and you didn't actually accomplish anything. I'll spare you this time. But if you still don't know your mistake..."

"Take him out."

The little devil helped Master Wu up and pushed him out of the courtroom. A thick fog rolled in, and Master Wu's vision went black.

……

"Father, Father!"

Master Wu sat up abruptly. He was lying on the couch, and his daughter was sitting by the bed, holding his hand.

"Father, you're awake?" Miss Wu's eyes were red as she wiped the sweat from Master Wu's forehead.

Master Wu was panting heavily, his whole body soaked in sweat. He subconsciously looked around and saw a man in plain clothes sitting on a chair not far away.

"This is……"

"When Aunt Liu saw that you had fainted, she went to call the doctor, and it was the doctor who treated you."

"Thank you, sir." Master Wu bowed.

The fox smiled and said, "It was nothing, no need to thank me."

Master Wu gripped his daughter's hand tightly: "I've thought it through. If you don't want to marry, then don't marry. We'll post notices everywhere first thing tomorrow morning."

He took a breath and said, "You don't need to write that notice, I will. You don't need to take the blame for my mistakes."

Miss Wu froze, biting her lip, and after a long while, she finally spoke: "Father, what exactly did you dream about?"

Master Wu lay back down and murmured, "Alas, this time, Father has truly taken a trip to the underworld."

"Father saw the judge, saw the underworld..." he murmured, "The ghostly wails and howls of the underworld still echo in Father's ears."

"Hmm?" The fox looked up. "What's your opinion on the fox's playing?"