Luo Qianyu could no longer hold back.
She suddenly threw herself into Xu Qing's arms, hugging his waist tightly with both hands.
She buried her face in his chest and cried loudly.
"sorry……"
"I'm so sorry..."
"I didn't mean to lie to you..."
Xu Qing's hand froze in mid-air before finally landing on Luo Qianyu's trembling back.
There was no force; it was like soothing a frightened kitten, gently stroking her back.
The person in his arms was crying so hard that their body was burning hot. Their tears quickly soaked through the fabric of his clothes, sticking to their skin in a sticky and uncomfortable way.
But he didn't move.
The wind on the terrace was a bit strong, making the sheer curtains next to it rustle loudly.
Xu Qing looked up at the moon in the sky and suddenly felt a little tired.
The kind of exhaustion wasn't the physical fatigue from carrying bricks all day, but rather like a rubber band that had been stretched taut for a year, suddenly slackening just before it was about to snap, leaving you feeling completely empty.
"Alright."
Xu Qing's voice was very soft, and there was no discernible emotional fluctuation in it.
"If you keep crying, your eyes will be swollen like walnuts tomorrow morning. How will you be able to face anyone then?"
Luo Qianyu ignored him and instead tightened her arms around him, as if she wanted to meld herself into his very bones.
She is afraid.
I'm afraid that if I let go, this person in front of me will disappear like in my dream.
Xu Qing sighed, reached out and pinched the back of her neck, using a little force to pull her away from his embrace.
Luo Qianyu was forced to raise her head, her face covered in tears, her eyes red and her nose red. She looked extremely disheveled, completely unlike the aloof diva she usually was.
"Look at me."
Xu Qing stared into her eyes.
Luo Qianyu sobbed, her vision blurring as she focused on his face.
"Luo Qianyu, listen to me."
Xu Qing reached out and roughly wiped away the tears on her cheeks with his thumb. The movement was not gentle, and it even made her skin a little red.
"I'm not dead, and you're alive and well too."
"As long as you're not dead, that's all that matters."
He spoke these words very slowly, each word seeming to be squeezed out from the depths of his throat.
Luo Qianyu's pupils trembled suddenly.
As long as you're not dead.
These seven simple words contain countless days and nights of despair and prayers, only Xu Qing himself knows.
Compared to all that so-called deception, concealment, and pain, compared to the year he lived like a dog, as long as she was alive, as long as she could still breathe, and as long as she could still cry in front of him.
Everything else seems unimportant.
But that doesn't mean nothing happened.
Xu Qing withdrew his hand, put it in his pocket, and took a step back.
This step created an invisible chasm between the two of them once again.
Luo Qianyu subconsciously reached out to grab it, but grasped at nothing.
"Xu Qing..."
"I have to go."
Xu Qing interrupted her, his tone returning to its usual nonchalant, even weary and distant manner.
"These past few days at the hospital have been exhausting, and I just heard you crying for ages. My head hurts."
"I need to find a place to get a good night's sleep and clear my head."
Luo Qianyu panicked.
She didn't even bother to put on her shoes, taking two barefoot steps forward to catch up: "Where are you going? There are plenty of rooms here, you can sleep here, I promise I won't disturb you, I..."
"Luo Qianyu".
Xu Qing interrupted her again, looking at her calmly, "This is your home, not mine."
"Besides, seeing you now evokes rather complicated feelings."
"On one hand, I'm glad you're still alive, but on the other hand, I want to hang you up and beat you up."
Xu Qing forced a smile, revealing an extremely strained expression.
"For your safety and to avoid breaking the law, it's best if we separate for a while."
"Calming down is better for everyone."
After saying that, he didn't look at Luo Qianyu again and turned to walk out of the room.
His back view was resolute, without any hesitation.
Luo Qianyu stood there, watching the figure disappear into the shadows behind the door.
She wanted to pursue him.
The foot has already been stepped out.
But reason told her she couldn't pursue him.
Xu Qing is like a patient whose wound has just healed; he won't die, but it will still hurt if you touch him.
Pressuring him too much will only make him escape faster.
She knows Xu Qing too well.
This man may seem easygoing, but he's actually more stubborn than anyone else. Once he's made up his mind, nothing can change it. If he says he's leaving now, he really means it.
Luo Qianyu bit her lip tightly until blood seeped from it, before she managed to resist rushing out.
She could only wait.
Once he's calmed down.
When he is willing to accept this version of himself that is full of lies again.
"Xu Qing..."
Luo Qianyu squatted down, hugged her knees with both hands, buried her face in her arms, and tears flowed silently.
No matter how long it takes.
I'll wait.
As long as you still want me.
……
The main entrance of Genting Manor.
At four in the morning in Beijing, the sky was still dark, and the air carried a damp, cold smell of dew.
The butler, Old Zhang, wearing a thick coat and holding car keys, stood respectfully next to a black Maybach.
Seeing Xu Qing stroll out of the manor with his hands in his pockets, Old Zhang quickly went to greet him.
"Son-in-law... uh, Mr. Xu."
Old Zhang quickly changed his tune, a cautious smile plastered on his face, "The master instructed that it's difficult to get a taxi at this hour, so he asked me to take you home."
Xu Qing stopped and glanced at the expensive luxury car, then at Old Zhang's wrinkled face.
"Old Luo isn't asleep yet?"
"How can the master sleep?" Old Zhang sighed. "He's smoking in his study, and the ashtray is full."
Xu Qing nodded without saying anything.
Old Zhang pulled a pack of specially supplied cigarettes from his pocket, took one out, and handed it to Mr. Xu: "Mr. Xu, would you like one?"
Xu Qing glanced at the cigarette and waved his hand.
"I've quit."
Old Zhang was stunned for a moment, his hand frozen in mid-air.
Xu Qing ignored his surprise and reached into her hoodie pocket to pull out a small, colorful tin box.
That was the chewing gum he bought at a roadside convenience store.
I poured out two pills and popped them into my mouth.
"Crunch, crunch."
The sound of chewing was exceptionally clear in the quiet of the early morning.
Xu Qing chewed vigorously, her cheeks bulging, but her eyes were somewhat fixed on the streetlights in the distance.
I chewed for less than ten seconds.
"Pooh."
He turned his head and spat the chewing gum in his mouth into the grass next to him.
Then he poured out two more pills.
Throw it into your mouth.
Crunch, crunch.
I chewed it a few times.
"Pooh."
I threw up again.
Old Zhang's eyelids twitched as he watched from the side.
Is this how you chew gum?
But he dared not ask, nor dared he speak.
Xu Qing's current state looks very strange.
On the surface, he appeared calm as still water, but his whole being exuded an extremely suppressed sense of anxiety, like a live volcano that could erupt at any moment.
This mechanical chewing and spitting seemed to be his only outlet for venting his emotions.
"Mr. Xu, please get in the car, it's chilly outside." Old Zhang opened the back door.
Xu Qing popped two more pieces of chewing gum into her mouth. This time, she didn't spit them out immediately, but instead held them in her mouth and mumbled, "Thanks."
He bent down and climbed into the car.
The car door closed, shutting out the cold air from outside.
The Maybach started and smoothly glided into the night.
Old Zhang glanced at it through the rearview mirror.
Xu Qing leaned back in her chair, closed her eyes, and kept chewing.
……
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