Jobless Reincarnation: The King with a Mental Problem

After fighting with Old Deng and returning home, I discovered that the trouble caused by "Alucard" was much bigger than I had imagined.

As the person who was resurrected, I was almost kidnapped.

Those magicians and those religious people...

Oh shit!

They're all lunatics!

It's not fair to blame me for having a prejudice against magicians, after all, the most capable of pulling off amazing feats in Type-Moon are magicians.

After giving a few brief instructions to Eileen and Old Deng, I got up before dawn, grabbed my bucket, and ran off!

Oh shit!

Even though I'm in another world, my civil engineering friend's life is still chasing me!

Escaping may be shameful, but it's effective.

In short, I, the king, have slipped away.

After removing the hood, they changed their clothes.

From this day forward, the Shadow Lord and the Flash Blademaster are complete strangers!

The original plan was to wander around aimlessly, relax, buy some gifts for Xia Aisha, and then return to the Land of the Sword Saint.

If possible, impersonate Alucard and leave some traces so that the gods have something to do.

But plans often go awry...

Old Deng has passed his little dragon king to me.

Why?

Why is it always like this?

Am I simply not suited for making plans?

"What are you doing following me, woman?"

Nina remained silent, only making a crooked face.

That crooked mouth and slanted eyes made him look like his mother was paralyzed on one side, and he was still standing there as if he wanted to say something, but was waiting for me to ask him personally!

Oh shit!

I wish I could slap her twice!

It's good that she doesn't speak; even I, the king, have a dislike for stupidity.

Talking to an idiot only makes you angrier.

She probably came along because she wanted to wander around. After all, she had been cooped up in the camp for several days, and anyone would want to get some fresh air.

Garlic bird, garlic bird...

After all, I am an adult. I can't just beat up a little girl for no reason and then run away with her.

Please ask her to follow along obediently and not cause trouble like a nobody.

That's fine.

Please, God, let it be!

[Some time later, in a certain town]

The town is not small; several main streets intersect in a cross shape, with shops lining both sides, their signs swaying gently in the wind.

The air was filled with the aroma of baked bread, the bitter smell wafting from the herb shop, and the clanging of hammers from the blacksmith's shop on the street corner—a stark contrast to the days in the Land of the Sword Saint, where only wind, snow, and the sound of swords rang out.

I plunged headfirst into the handicraft shop.

I picked out a hand-cranked bell for little Aisha, and bought a few plush toys, including a silly-looking rabbit and a chubby penguin.

That penguin was practically asking me, "Want to buy some QQ coins?"

It took me a while to confirm that the person who did this was simply drunk and not from my hometown.

Nina picked up a plush toy and put it down, picked up a hairband and put it down, picked up a snack and put it down.

I suddenly realized that this girl might... not have brought any money...

Oh shit......

How can there be such a stupid dog?

You want to steal my gold coins just to play around?

......

......

......

Tsk!

"Take it!"

"Huh?"

"Remember to go back... Never mind... Don't bother returning it..."

I would rather see her less often.

And she didn't receive much money, just a bag of candy and a gold coin.

This amount of money is nothing to me now.

Because when I recreated the new Durandal, I mastered a more efficient money-printing method—directly generating magic stones using a Reality Marble.

Magic stones are generally found in labyrinths where magic is abundant, or inside powerful monsters.

A single magic stone is only enough to cast a few high-level spells at most, but it can still be sold for a considerable amount of money.

Most magicians with insufficient magic power have to rely on a large number of magic stones in combination with magic circles to cast spells.

Furthermore, when magic stones are ground into powder and mixed with substances like mercury, they become a basic material for drawing magic circles.

Therefore, this thing is considered a form of hard currency in the three great magical kingdoms.

They sell much better than simply pretty gemstones.

Ugh......

What a wonderful day...

"Little Dragon King, stay with me and don't get lost."

"Um……"

She agreed.

They actually agreed.

No talking back, no smirking, no asking for a beating, no asking for a beating...

Wang turned around excitedly for a glance.

Okay, he still has a crooked mouth.

But Wang still felt joy.

It's just like how Old Deng spoils you!

If a naughty child gets beaten up a few times, he'll learn to be sensible and understand the harsh realities of society.

Oh my God!

I, the king, am actually an educator?

Although I cannot match the ability of the saint Hilfi to enlighten the people, I am still pleased.

As I traveled, I looked around and tried my best to buy some interesting little trinkets for Aisha to bring back.

Then I saw a fruit stand.

Wow, are there already melons for sale in early spring?

"Uncle, how much are your melons per pound?"

"Two copper coins per pound."

"What's up? Is the rind of this melon made of gold, or are the melon seeds made of gold?"

"Look at this place, where are the melons now? These are all from the magic greenhouse, and you think they're too expensive, and I think they're too expensive too!"

That makes some sense...

"Pick one for me!"

"OK!"

After the uncle stood up, he found a big object and patted it twice.

"How about this one?"

Is this melon guaranteed to be ripe?

I was just asking casually...

"I run a fruit stand, do you think I'd sell you raw melons and eggs?"

"I'm asking you, is this melon guaranteed to be ripe?"

Then, the familiar dialogue triggered something...

The melon stall owner suddenly stared at me...

"Are you deliberately trying to cause trouble?! Do you want to or not?!"

Hey!

This king has such a fiery temper!

"If this melon is ripe, I definitely want it! But what if it's not ripe?"

"If it's not cooked, I'll eat it myself! Are you satisfied now!"

What will happen next...?

I've forgotten because I've seen too many fan-made works.

In short—just split the melon!

Wang picked up a fruit knife and chopped down.

The knife cut perfectly straight, splitting the melon in two instantly and perfectly.

He chopped even better than Liu Huaqiang!

And this melon was also riper than Liu Huaqiang's...

"You fucking chop...my...melon...you can just chop it up..."

"Oh...we really are familiar with them...then I...I'll buy a few more..."

"Alright, young master, please have a seat. I'll pick out a few good ones for you."

"Um......"

Oh shit......

That's fucking shameful...

[After a short period of time]

Nina finally spoke after leaving the fruit stand.

"Was all that politeness of yours just an act after all...?"

"No... I just... I just... didn't want to be cheated by the melon vendor..."

Actually, it was just that the person having fun was triggered by some underlying code...

have to.

I'm pretty tired of walking around.

Let's find a hotel to stay in.

Just then...

Nina suddenly ran away...

"what?"

Then I followed along, and only after a short distance did I realize what Nina was chasing.

It turns out they weren't after cough syrup...

A burlap sack was covering a child, but his legs were still sticking out.

Human traffickers don't usually rely on their legs to run away!

really!

Another accomplice arrived on horseback to provide backup!

He planned to turn the tables, ride off on his accomplice's horse, and escape!

How could I possibly give you a chance!

Before the two could reunite, a rockburst grenade blasted his comrade and his horse into pieces.

But that guy only stumbled and scrambled a few times before continuing to run into the alley...

They even brought hostages with them...

As for?

Wouldn't it be faster to run away if we just abandoned the child?

Are human traffickers all this dedicated?

Nina runs faster than I thought.

Her blue hair flashed a few times in the crowd before she disappeared into the depths of the alley.

I circled around from the other side, and after turning three corners, I blocked the guy with the burlap sack at the end of the alley.

He pulled the little girl out of the sack, grabbed her by the neck with one hand, and held a dagger in the other, the blade pressed against the girl's ear.

The human trafficker must have been terrified by the scene of carnage that had just unfolded.

His eyes were bloodshot and he was sweating profusely.

Simply put—they've lost their minds.

The alley was narrow. Nina stood not far away, her sword already drawn, but she dared not move.

Her hands were trembling, the tip of the sword was shaking, her eyes were red-rimmed, and she kept cursing.

"You scum! Let her go! Come at me if you dare!"

But the man didn't look at her at all; he was just panting, his eyes darting around, glancing at himself and then at the direction of the alley's exit.

"Don't come any closer! If you do, I'll slit her throat!"

The little girl was crying, but she was crying very quietly, afraid that crying too loudly would upset someone.

I pointed my finger at the human trafficker as if it were a gun.

"You have two options: a very painful way to die, and a less painful way to live. I'll give you three seconds to choose."

"What are you doing?"

"three."

I said goodbye—

"two."

"Don't think I wouldn't dare!"

"BANG".

A sword shot out from Wang Cai's body, and before he could even blink, the arm holding the dagger was severed in two.

Then the sword, along with his body, was driven into the wall behind him, scattering rubble and blood mist.

The dagger fell to the ground with a clang, the severed arm still clutching the hilt, its fingers still twitching.

The little girl slipped from his loosened arms.

Nina rushed forward and caught her.

"Damn it! Come here right now! Her neck has been slashed!"

"I know!"

I had already prepared for the possibility of slightly injuring this little girl, but as long as the injury wasn't too serious, I could heal her.

The child only had a scratch on his neck; it wasn't a serious injury. But Nina was still as anxious as if her own child had been hurt.

Nina squatted down, hugged the little girl in her arms, gently patted her back with one hand, and clumsily wiped the tears from her face with the other.

Nina's mouth was still crooked, but this time it didn't seem like she was mocking anyone; it seemed more like she didn't know how to face the trembling little thing in her arms.

"Um...it's alright now. The bad guys were chased away. You...you don't cry. It's alright..."

The little girl's crying gradually subsided. She clutched Nina's clothes with her little hands and buried her face in her arms.

Looking at the two of them, I remembered that this girl was still just a kid herself.

But the way the little devil coaxed the little devil was more reliable than I expected.

I walked toward the man nailed to the wall. He was shouting something, probably "Spare me," "I still have family," or "I was just confused for a moment."

I don't care.

I raised my finger again, and this single gesture terrified him so much he wet himself.

"Don't be afraid, you won't die right now, but it will hurt a lot."

"Please—"

"Bang!"

He raised his finger, aimed it at his left knee, and fired a compressed air blast into it, which then exploded from the inside.

Right knee, one more shot.

"Bang!"

There's an elbow, another one.

"Bang!"

I feel like there could be fewer parts left.

"Bang!"

"Bang!"

"Bang!"

"Bang!"

As I said, I have no intention of killing him for the time being.

The goal is simply to make him lose consciousness and throw him into the inherent barrier.

So at the same time, healing magic is used to heal and turn the excess parts into minced meat.

As for the blood and gore, it was partly to vent his anger, and partly to make Nina believe that he had become scum.

Since we're already here...

After extracting information through torture, impersonate Alucard and eliminate their small group.

After taking the person inside, they returned to the two little girls' side.

"Weren't you afraid of hurting the child just now...?"

"I'm afraid, but fear is useless. To prevent things from getting worse, someone always has to do the hard thing..."

"Um......"

"The sword nailed to the wall is yours."

"Um......"

"Um......"

"Thanks......"

"Um......?"

【after a while】

We found out the little girl's home was a small courtyard not far from the fruit stand.

When Nina returned the little girl to her parents, the couple were extremely grateful, bowing and apologizing profusely.

Nina stood in the doorway, arms crossed, watching the couple, who were indeed hurling insults.

"What kind of parents are you! Nobody even knew your child was missing? That's a human trafficker's hideout over there! If we hadn't happened to be passing by today—"

She cursed a lot, and her voice trembled slightly by the end.

"If you can't raise them properly, then don't raise them at all!!!"

On the way back, she remained silent for a long time.

"..."

Nina is acting very strange today...

He's become much quieter, more sensible, more reliable, and much more polite...

What happened?

never mind......

Who cares...

"I'm going to the magic item shop."

"Why are you going again?"

"Buy some self-defense items for the children."

"I see... Couldn't you have protected her and prevented this from happening to her...?"

"well......."

Of course I want to too...

but......

"There's nothing wrong with preparing more things for her while we still have the resources."

"You're so strong! Why can't you protect her properly!"

Nina... I don't know why she suddenly got angry...

"Of course I don't want her to get hurt, but... don't you have any idea how terrible this world is?"

"but......"

"Expectations only lead to hurt... There are too many things that won't happen just because you don't want them to. All I can do is be fully prepared."

"but......"

I once heard a saying: all misfortunes are caused by the inadequacy of the person involved.

It's a bit cringey... but there's some truth to it...

"Perhaps... if I become the strongest in the world, all misfortunes will stay away from me, but... I am far from that yet."

I don't want to find out I'm unprepared when Aisha is threatened...

"I see..."

"Yes, that's it..."

She didn't ask any more questions.

We walked through the town's main street, passing the shop where we bought the hairband that afternoon, and then the melon stall.

As they were about to leave the hotel, she suddenly spoke.

"My father told me about your situation. That maid's child isn't yours. So why did you become that child's father? If you're not capable enough, why did you—"

"Did Old Deng tell you that?"

Old Deng talks way too much nonsense...

"Hmm," she looked up at me, "you don't actually like older women, so you couldn't control yourself when you saw the busty maid and acted on impulse—"

"Damn it!!!"

Old Deng talks so much nonsense!!!

I've planted that bastard who's spouting nonsense back into the ground!

Then Wang squatted on the ground and tore at the little dragon king's filthy mouth with both hands!

"Because all those around me are divine beings, none of them can be trusted in this matter!"

That's why I personally took charge!

And I have someone I like!

I haven't even been in a relationship yet!

They even have children!

How much do you think I've sacrificed!

and also!

If you dare mention that big-breasted maid again, I'll tear your mouth apart!!!

"Ughhhhhh!!!"

Oh shit!

It barks like a dog!

When she tore open that woman's mouth, her saliva got all over my hand!

That's fucking disgusting!

Her face turned bright red, and she struggled to break free, but couldn't, so she could only glare at me.

After a while, she stopped making a fuss and finally admitted her mistake.

"I understand... That's good... Yes! That's it... At least you're quite useful in crucial moments..."

It really brought tears to my eyes...

Wang released his hand from her head and dispelled the earth magic as well.

After walking a while longer, she suddenly asked about Izerutti.

"What happened to Izuru that night...?"

"Probably... he was stimulated by seeing dirty, R-rated images of adults..."

"real?"

"Of course it's true."

I merely faked my death in front of her earlier...

She should be able to recover... right?

It should be... possible!

Ultimately, she has status, position, and resources; she's the kind of person who can cry while sitting in a BMW.

Psychological problems are just psychological problems.

Just change your mindset and you can laugh while sitting in a Maybach.

Ah!

That's it!

Sister Xiangzi has a lot of experience in this area!

【night】

After learning about the human traffickers' camp, the pure-hearted Alucard decides to rid everyone of evil!

"Who are you?!"

"Alucard".

"Don't you want to live anymore?"

"You should be the ones who die."

The King of Promises that Alucard is looking for is not here, so naturally he won't fight to a draw with anyone here.

One after another, the destined deaths were fired.

It wasn't that bloody; there were just a bunch of healthy corpses on the ground.

Um......

That's it...

It's just a bit of a pity...

If only I had the Hogwarts system and could unlock the Chain Forking Killing Curse...