Nine Nights Owl Song

The fifteenth day of the fifth month in the eighteenth year of Yong'an.

Liangzhou.

Xiao Yan's hand was still pressed against Su Jiuge's face, reluctant to let go.

His fingers gently traced the thin scar on her cheekbone—a fresh wound, covered with a thin scab, inflicted by a Qiang cavalryman's blade.

She said "everything is fine," but she was lying to him.

"Su Jiuge".

Xiao Yan's voice was very soft, as if he were afraid of disturbing something. Su Jiuge looked at him, and there was weariness and bloodshot eyes in his bright black eyes, but also a light he had never seen before—not murderous intent, but tenderness.

Like an undercurrent surging beneath the surface of ice, it is invisible but present.

Xiao Yan's heart was pounding fast and hard in his chest.

He told himself he couldn't. Article 9 of the prenuptial agreement clearly stated that Xiao Yan was not allowed to have any physical contact with Su Jiuge without her consent.

She just let him touch her face, which means she agreed, but it was a touch, not a kiss.

The contract doesn't mention kinship; kinship is a different matter.

He should control himself, he should turn away, he should wait for her letter, wait for her news, wait for her to return to Luoyang.

He couldn't control himself.

He kissed her.

It's not the forehead, it's not the cheek, it's the lips.

He kissed her fiercely and forcefully, as if he wanted to tell her all the longing, worry, and fear he had felt over the past few days in this one kiss.

He was afraid she wouldn't come back, afraid that the letter that said "all is well" was the last one, afraid that he hadn't had a chance to tell her—that he loved her.

I liked her from the first time we met at Shiliting, from when she said with a cold expression, "My sword is only for myself," and from when she said in court, "Your Majesty does not need to worry about my affairs with the Sixth Prince."

I've liked her for a very, very long time, so much so that I don't know how to express it, so much so that even if I did speak, I couldn't say it. The only thing I can do is tell her with a kiss.

Su Jiuge's body stiffened.

Her hand remained on the hilt of the knife, but she did not draw it.

Xiao Yan's lips were dry, with a sandy smell, but they were warm and firm.

He was kissing her; this person was kissing her.

Su Jiuge didn't know how she felt.

It wasn't anger, it wasn't disgust, it wasn't anything she expected.

It's a heartbeat.

Her heart had never been beating so fast, faster than when she was killing someone, faster than when she was fighting, faster than when she was facing 100,000 Qiang cavalry.

It happened so fast she didn't know what to do, so fast she felt like her chest was going to explode.

On the city wall, Zhao Ying lay crouching behind the crenellations, her eyes wide open and her mouth agape in an "O" shape.

Shen Qing stood next to him expressionlessly, but her ears turned red.

Zhao Xiaohe couldn't see anything because Shen Qing had covered her eyes, and she was so anxious that she stomped her feet.

"Brother Shen Qing, let me see you!"

Shen Qing said:

"Children shouldn't watch this."

Zhao Xiaohe said she was fifteen and not a child anymore.

Shen Qing didn't speak, but just covered her eyes, the redness from her ears spreading down to her neck.

Xiao Yan released Su Jiuge, took a step back, and looked at her.

Her lips were slightly red from being kissed, her eyes were wide open, and her face was expressionless.

He suddenly panicked, afraid that she would draw her sword, afraid that she would never speak to him again, afraid that she would throw him off the city wall of Liangzhou.

"Su Jiuge, I..."

Su Jiuge looked at him.

You kissed me.

"I..." Xiao Yan opened his mouth,

"I broke the contract."

Su Jiuge remained silent for a moment.

"No physical contact is allowed with Su Jiuge without her consent." Xiao Yan nodded.

Su Jiuge touched her lips.

"You didn't ask me before you kissed me."

Xiao Yan's heart sank to the bottom.

"Now, I agree."

Xiao Yan was taken aback.

Su Jiuge turned and left.

He took two steps, then stopped without looking back.

"Xiao Yan, next time, say so in advance."

Her figure disappeared into the shadows of the city gate.

Xiao Yan stood there, watching the direction she disappeared in, and reached out to touch his lips.

She said she'd let him know in advance next time—next time—she said next time. Xiao Yan's lips curved upwards, curving very high.

On the city wall, Zhao Ying slapped her thigh and burst out laughing.

Shen Qing's ears turned as red as if they were on fire.

Zhao Xiaohe finally broke free from Shen Qing's hand and peered down from the crenellation—she only saw Xiao Yan standing there grinning foolishly; Sister Jiuge was nowhere to be seen.

Zhao Xiaohe pouted, "You're bullying me!"

Shen Qing looked at her pouting lips and, as if possessed, reached out and turned her head away.

"Stop looking." Zhao Xiaohe's face turned as red as a boiled shrimp.

Zhao Ying laughed so hard she slid off the edge of the stack.

At dusk, Xiao Yan stood atop the city wall of Liangzhou.

Su Jiuge walked up and stood next to him without him noticing. They stood side by side, gazing into the distance, the setting sun painting the western sky a dark red.

Xiao Yan spoke first.

"Su Jiuge, I'm sorry about what happened this afternoon. I couldn't control myself. I was afraid you wouldn't come back, afraid those letters would be the last, afraid I didn't have time to tell you—I like you. Not the liking of a collaborator, not the liking of a friend, but that kind of liking. It started from the first time we met at Shiliting."

Su Jiuge remained silent.

"I know."

Xiao Yan looked at her. "You know?"

Su Jiuge didn't look at him, but gazed at the setting sun in the distance.

She said she didn't understand emotions. In the eight years she spent in the Dark Pavilion, all she learned was how to kill. No one had ever taught her how to like someone. Later, she returned to the Marquis's mansion and married into the Prince Zhao's mansion. People came and went in her life; some were kind to her, and some were not.

She couldn't distinguish between what was good and what was bad. But she knew Xiao Yan was different; he peeled chestnuts for her, brewed tea, gave her books, and explained military strategy.

He shielded her from a knife, investigated evidence for her, pleaded for her before his father, and traveled thousands of miles to Liangzhou to see her.

These are not things that collaborators should do; they are things that people who like her should do.

Xiao Yan's eyes reddened.

Su Jiuge looked at him.

"Xiao Yan, I haven't learned how to like someone yet. But I'm learning. Wait for me."

Tears welled up in Xiao Yan's eyes.

Su Jiuge reached out her hand, her fingers touching his face; it was cool and light.

"You cried? I can't speak when you cry."

Xiao Yan held her hand tightly.

"I wasn't crying, it was the sandstorm."

Su Jiuge did not pull her hand away.

The two stood side by side atop the city wall of Liangzhou, watching the sunset.

The wind blowing from the west carried yellow sand, which was indeed blinding.

Zhao Ying peered down from the top of the city wall, a wide grin spreading across his face. Shen Qing stood beside him, expressionless. Zhao Xiaohe's eyes were covered again.

"Brother Shen Qing, I'm really going to get angry this time!" Zhao Xiaohe kicked her legs.

Shen Qing did not let go.

Zhao Ying slid down from the top of the city wall and patted the dirt off her body.

"Let's go, let's go. It's not appropriate for us to be here as lamplight while the host and the pavilion master are watching the sunset from the city wall."

He walked away laughing.

Shen Qing pulled Zhao Xiaohe along behind him. Zhao Xiaohe's wrist was held by Shen Qing, and the heat of his palm made her heart race. She did not pull away.

May 15th, night.

On the city wall of Liangzhou, Xiao Yan and Su Jiuge sat side by side. Above them were countless stars, and the Milky Way stretched across the sky.

The wind blew from the west, carrying the roughness of yellow sand. Su Jiuge leaned against the city wall, and Xiao Yan sat beside her, their shoulders about a fist's distance apart.

Xiao Yan asked her when she would return to Luoyang.

Su Jiuge said that even after the Qiang tribe completely withdrew, Helian Tieshu was still gathering troops in the north, and the battle was not over yet.

Xiao Yan remained silent.

Su Jiuge said she would go back and that she would definitely keep her promise.

Xiao Yan asked, "Really?"

"real."

Xiao Yan looked at her.

Her profile was beautiful in the moonlight; her eyelashes were long, her nose was straight, and her lips were thin. He had kissed her lips that afternoon and remembered the feel of them.

"Su Jiuge".

"Um."

"I'm waiting for you."

Su Jiuge turned to look at him. The two gazed at each other under the starry sky, the wind passing between them, carrying the scent of yellow sand.

There are many things in this world that can't wait—war can't wait, killing can't wait, revenge can't wait.

But if I like something, I can wait.

I'll wait however long it takes.