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Chapter 34 Gourd Mouth, Pig Butchering Scam

As dawn broke, the wind and snow stopped.

Li Ping pushed open the study door, sporting dark circles under his eyes, and clutching several sheets of crookedly drawn yellow paper in his hand.

Last night, he exhausted the last bit of spiritual energy in his body and finally managed to draw three barely usable "bewitching talismans".

The courtyard was packed with people.

On the left are more than twenty county yamen runners wearing prison uniforms, their necks shivering from the cold.

In the middle were hundreds of mountain people carrying pitchforks and hoes.

On the right were dozens of hunters draped in animal skins and carrying bows and arrows.

This group of people were clearly divided, and they couldn't stand each other.

The constables complained about the smell of the mountain people, the mountain people complained about the constables' greed, while the hunters watched indifferently, as if observing a herd of wild boars waiting to be slaughtered.

Li Ping walked up the steps and cleared his throat.

"Everyone, perk up!"

"Today we're going to kill someone. If we're late, we won't even get a sip of hot soup."

The room fell silent; hundreds of eyes were fixed on him.

Li Ping first looked at the constable on the left, took out a ten-tael silver ingot from his sleeve, and threw it directly onto the bluestone slab at his feet.

The silver coin made a crisp sound, and the constables' eyes widened in surprise.

"Magistrate Chen has decreed that today's bandit suppression will result in a reward of five taels of silver for every bandit's head chopped off!"

"Whoever can chop off Hu Lie's head gets this silver ingot, plus a promotion to foreman!"

Li Ping pointed to the silver on the ground.

"The knives in your hands, which you usually use to cut vegetables and melons, should see some blood today."

"Want to get rich? Grip the knife handle tight!"

The constables' breathing became heavy, and several of the bolder ones had already drawn their swords, testing the blades with their thumbs.

Li Ping turned to look at the mountain people in the middle, his tone turning cold.

"Hu Lie robbed the county government of its tax grain yesterday."

"Who do you think will rob next after he finishes eating this batch of grain?"

"Do you still have a few pounds of sweet potatoes hidden in your cellar?"

"Are you saving those pitchforks for next spring to use for dung, or are you going to use them today to target bandits and secure food for your wives and children?"

The mountain people looked at each other in bewilderment, then someone shouted out.

"Kill those sons of bitches!"

The crowd was immediately enraged, and the pitchforks were raised like a small forest.

Li Ping finally looked at the hunters on his right. These men had lived in the mountains year-round, were used to life and death, and were the hardest to fool.

Fellow hunters

Li Ping cupped his hands in greeting.

"Black Wind Stronghold occupies the best forest in the mountains; you have to pay a toll even to hunt a rabbit there."

"Today we've leveled Black Wind Stronghold, and from now on, that forest will be your backyard."

"The government will absolutely not collect a single penny of tax!"

The hunters exchanged glances, then took their longbows from their backs, pulled the bowstrings, and produced a series of muffled thuds.

Each gets what they need, and the collective strength is united.

Li Ping nodded in satisfaction, then turned and walked back to the duty room.

A gaunt old man followed him in.

The old man was wearing a tattered wolf skin and holding a pipe, puffing away happily.

He was the leader of the hunters, known as "Old Smoker".

"Lord Li, your tongue is smoother than a fox in the mountains."

The old smoker exhaled a puff of smoke, pulled a greasy sheepskin from his pocket, and spread it on the table.

This is a rough topographic map of the outer perimeter of the Wanzhong Mountains.

The old smoker's withered fingers pointed to a spot on the sheepskin.

"My lord, this is the perfect place to ambush Hu Lie."

We hunters call this "gourd mouth".

Li Ping took a closer look

The terrain does indeed resemble a gourd, narrow at both ends and wide in the middle.

On both sides are steep stone walls, covered with thorny brambles.

"What's so great about this place?"

Li Ping asked

Fortunately, it can only go in, but it's extremely difficult to get out.

The old smoker tapped his pipe.

"Normally when we chase wild boars, we just drive them into the mouth of the gourd, block both ends, and the wild boar will just circle around inside, waiting to die."

"Hu Lie brought over a hundred men; once they enter this gourd-shaped mouth, they'll be a bunch of fat pigs waiting to be slaughtered."

Li Ping's eyes lit up, and he slammed his hand on the table.

"Alright! Let's settle on Hulukou! Old Smoker, you lead the way, and have the hunters ambush us on the cliffs on both sides."

"Prepare more rolling stones and logs."

The old smoker grinned, revealing a mouthful of yellow teeth, then turned and went out the door.

Li Ping called Qian Duo in.

"You have plenty of money. Go to the city now and find a few gossipy idlers."

"Give them a few hundred coins and let them spread the word outside the city."

Li Ping lowered his voice

"Take Inspector Ren for example. He has led five hundred soldiers from Jiangning County and has already crossed Luoxing Bridge. He will arrive at Xiyun County within half a day."

Qian Duoyi was stunned

"My lord, how could Lord Ren have time to come to our poor, remote place? This lie is too blatant."

The bigger the lie, the more people will believe it.

Li Ping sneered.

Miao Jun, who's next to Hu Lie, is a shrewd man.

"Upon hearing this news, he certainly wouldn't dare linger outside the city."

He will force Hu Lie to resolve the matter quickly.

"If they get desperate, they'll plunge headlong into our trap."

Qian Duo accepted the order and ran off in a flash.

Finally, Li Ping called Shi Gan into the house.

Shi Gan's knife wound on his back had just scabbed over, and he was still a little stiff when he walked, but he insisted on going with them.

"My lord, I am capable of killing."

Shi Gan patted the short sword at his waist.

Li Ping pulled a large sack from under the table and untied it.

Inside were dozens of fist-sized paper packets.

"You don't need to do the killing yourself."

Li Ping picked up a paper package and handed it to Shi Gan.

"This is 'Three Steps to Death' that I got from three pharmacies in the city. I had someone increase the quantity tenfold and mixed in quicklime and chili powder."

Shi Gan sniffed it, then sneezed loudly, his eyes almost watering.

"Miao Jun is a Qi Refining cultivator; ordinary swords and blades cannot harm him."

Li Ping carefully affixed the three "bewitching charms" he had drawn the night before to the three largest paper packages.

"You personally carry these three bundles with added ingredients."

"Once Miao Jun enters the gourd's mouth, find the right moment, light the talisman with a tinderbox, and smash it directly into his face."

Shi Gan stared wide-eyed

"Sir, can this talisman be used as a firecracker?"

"This is called making the best use of resources."

Li Ping patted the cinnabar powder off his hands.

"When the talisman explodes, it can draw upon spiritual energy and create a fleeting illusion."

"With ten times the amount of sleeping potion and lime-chili powder, even a god would have to close his eyes and shed tears."

"As long as he closes his eyes, the hunters' steel crossbow bolts can turn him into a sieve."

Shi Gan grinned, but the smile aggravated the wound on his back, causing him to gasp in pain.

"That's a really cunning move, sir."

"What's the point of morality when dealing with man-eating beasts?"

Li Ping tied up the sack and tossed it to Shi Gan.

"Let's go to Hulukou."

Half an hour later

More than two hundred people marched out of the south gate of Xiyun County and headed straight for Hulukou, on the outskirts of the Wanzhong Mountains.

at the same time

Led by Hu Lie, the bandits of Black Wind Stronghold were running wildly across the snow like a pack of hungry wolves.

Miao Jun walked in the middle of the group, his black robe billowing in the wind.

He held the emerald green bead in his hand, his brows slightly furrowed.

Our scouts have just reported that the Inspector of Jiangning County is leading 500 soldiers towards Xiyun County.

This news came at such a perfect time.

"Young Master Hu, have the troops quicken their pace."

Miao Jun's voice was cold.

"Kill Li Ping before the county troops arrive, seize the martial arts manual, and immediately retreat to the deep mountains. Do not linger in battle."

Hu Lie brandished his nine-ringed broadsword and roared.

"Brothers! Run fast! Once we're in town, there'll be plenty of white flour buns! Kill!"

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