I was born and listened to my neighbor's older sister talk about her family of origin.

Hearing Lin Youxun's words, Lin Xinghe was stunned for two seconds.

"More friends?"

She whispered, seemingly not understanding at all.

He forced a smile, but it looked rather awkward.

"Sister, what are you saying? I have enough with all of you!"

Looking at her expression, Lin Youxun couldn't help but bite her lower lip.

Lin Xinghe has changed a lot since that incident when she was a child.

She no longer trusts anyone outside the family and finds it difficult to make friends with anyone. Instead, she wraps herself in sharp thorns, hurting others and herself in the process.

Only when facing family will I put away my sharp edges and reveal my truest self.

But Lin Youxun knew that this was wrong.

I didn't think much of it before, and I thought it was okay for Xinghe to be like this.

Because they are the closest people in the world to each other, and they will always be together, which is wonderful.

But just yesterday, she had a very vague dream.

A fragmented, somber dream.

There was no sound in my dream, only a series of silent images.

My mother is crying, and I don't know when she started to have a lot of white hair at her temples.

My brother and father sat in the yard, smoking one cigarette after another, their backs as heavy as mountains.

And her younger sister... In the dream, Lin Xinghe had grown up, wearing dark clothes that didn't belong to her, with no smile on her face, only an overwhelming weariness.

They looked at "themselves" with a gaze that Lin Youxun couldn't understand—a gaze filled with pain, pity, and a sense of helpless despair.

What's wrong with me?

she does not know.

The perspective shifts, and she sees Lin Xinghe, now grown up, handing a letter to a boy.

The boy's face was blurry and indistinct, yet there was an inexplicable sense of familiarity about him.

He opened the letter.

Then, the blurry figure knelt on the ground, crying heartbreakingly.

But the younger sister didn't turn around.

She walked a very, very long way alone, her silhouette stretched long, as lonely as a withered tree in a wasteland.

The end of the dream.

She saw her sister lying in the bathtub, the water overflowing and staining the entire floor red.

When Lin Youxun woke up the next day, she had almost forgotten the content of her dream.

Only the wet patch on her pillow and the lingering, clenched pain in her heart reminded her that it wasn't a good dream.

Until today, I saw Jiang Ye again.

For a fleeting moment, the blurry outline of the boy in my dream overlapped with Jiang Ye's face.

It struck my mind like a bolt of lightning.

Lin Youxun felt that she should do something.

In particular, Lin Xinghe cannot continue like this.

She had a strange premonition.

One day, she will leave, her brother will get married, and her parents will grow old.

If at that time, my sister was still all alone...

That's not good, that's really not good.

Lin Youxun looked at her younger sister, who still looked childish, with a confused and helpless expression.

"Xinghe".

She spoke clearly, word by word.

"What if I'm gone one day?"

Lin Xinghe was stunned.

The kitchen was filled with the white steam of flour, and the tap wasn't turned off properly, dripping one drop at a time into the stainless steel sink in a monotonous rhythm.

"What did you say?"

Lin Xinghe's voice was very soft, as if she hadn't heard clearly, or as if she didn't dare to confirm.

Lin Youxun did not repeat.

She just stood there, quietly watching her sister.

There was no joking in those eyes, no trace of her usual gentleness and yielding.

There was only one kind of earnestness that Lin Xinghe had never seen before, an almost stubborn seriousness.

The light streaming in through the kitchen window shone on Lin Youxun's face, making her fine downy hairs shine.

She was still wearing her nightgown, her hair was messy, and one of her slippers was crooked, but at this moment, she felt like a stranger to Lin Xinghe.

"Sister, are you feeling unwell? What nonsense are you talking about?!"

Lin Xinghe's voice changed, revealing an undisguised panic.

She subconsciously reached out to touch Lin Youxun's forehead.

Lin Youxun didn't dodge, letting the flour-covered hand touch her.

"I don't feel uncomfortable."

Lin Youxun took her hand and gently pressed it down.

"I am fine."

"Then why did you say that!"

Lin Youxun lowered her eyes: "I just wanted you to think about how wonderful it would be if... I mean if... there were a day when you could have other people by your side besides me, your parents, and your brother."

Lin Xinghe looked at her, and for the first time, a sense of panic at being abandoned appeared on her face.

Her eyes immediately welled up with tears.

Why?

Her voice was very soft, like a feather, yet it carried a weight of a thousand pounds.

"Why do I have to think about this? Sister, don't you want me anymore?"

Before he finished speaking, tears started falling one after another, rolling down his flour-covered cheeks and leaving two messy muddy streaks.

"Where are Mom and Dad? Where is my brother? Don't you...don't you want me anymore?"

This question, filled with the purest fear of a child, struck Lin Youxun's heart like a small hammer.

How could a twelve-year-old understand Lin Youxun's words?

How could Lin Xinghe understand her actions when Lin Youxun, who was the same age as Lin Xinghe, was able to do so?

Lin Youxun panicked and quickly wiped away Lin Xinghe's tears, then hugged her.

"Don't cry, don't cry, I was wrong, it was my fault. I won't do it again, I'll never leave you!"

The two girls embraced, bathed in the sunlight of the kitchen, creating a warm and beautiful scene.

After a long while, Lin Xinghe finally lifted her head from her arms, her face covered in grime, and began to sob.

"It's good that you know you were wrong. You can't do it again."

Lin Youxun also felt that she was really too strange.

It's just a nightmare, why are you taking it so seriously? You scared Xinghe like this.

How could she possibly leave Xinghe in the future?

Dreams are always the opposite of reality!

But what exactly is going on with that boy named Jiang Ye?

Sigrún has taught at the Iceland University of the Arts as a part-time lecturer since and was Dean of the Department of Fine Art from -. In – she held a research position at Reykjavík Art Museum focusing on the role of women in Icelandic art. She studied fine art at the Icelandic College of Arts and Crafts and at Pratt Institute, New York, and holds BA and MA degrees in art history and philosophy from the University of Iceland. Sigrún lives and works in Iceland.

On the bus, Jiang Ye sat in the last row by the window, carrying the brown paper bag in his hand.

There weren't many people in the carriage, and the hum of the engine drowned out everything. The wind from outside blew in through the half-open window, making his hair fly wildly.

Jiang Ye looked down at the anthropomorphic lavender and star pattern on the paper bag.

Lavender's expression is smiling, while the star's expression is puffed out, looking defiant.

He could even imagine Lin Youxun's state of mind when she painted this picture—she must have known her sister very well to be able to capture that awkwardness so vividly with just a few simple strokes.

Jiang Ye's lips twitched as he recalled Lin Xinghe's reaction earlier.

Beneath her prickly exterior lies a deep care for her sister.

The thing these kinds of people fear most is loss.

The more afraid you are, the tighter you shrink yourself.

That's how Lin Xinghe was in her past life.

Jiang Ye saw her most often in the corridor of the inpatient department.

Back then, Lin Xinghe was far less lively and adorable than she is now. Her eyes were somewhat vacant and listless, and she always sat silently on the bench, motionless.

Like a piece of wood that has been soaked by the rain and can no longer be burned.

To be honest, he was very happy to be able to meet Lin Youxun ahead of time.

But seeing Lin Xinghe so lively and energetic again made me feel gratified.

It turns out she used to be quite outgoing.

As a result, he never had any contact with Lin Xinghe again after Lin Youxun's death.

But I suppose she, like me, eventually overcame her grief and started living a good life...