I'm in Wuha, and the whole internet is shipping me and Song Yuqi as a couple.

Song Yuqi covered the small red hair clip on her head, her cheeks burning all the way down to the base of her neck.

She tilted her head, staring intently at the coconut trees rushing past the car window. In the reflection of the glass, her face was smiling so broadly that her teeth were almost impossible to hide.

This man, who is usually so shrewd, really thinks he can be fooled with a simple "I'm getting old and I like festive things"?

Jiang Che leaned back in his leather seat, eyes closed, not even glancing at her. "Isn't your neck sore?"

He blurted out that sentence out of the blue.

Song Yuqi quickly turned her face back, cleared her throat, and took her hand off the hair clip and placed it on her knee.

"It's none of your business. Can't I even look at the scenery?"

Jiang Che lifted his eyelids, his gaze lingering on her reddened ears for two seconds, and let out a soft hum.

"Is the scenery prettier, or is it my own smile that looks better?"

"Jiang Che!" Song Yuqi was annoyed and kicked him in the shin.

Jiang Che didn't dodge. Instead, he stretched out his long leg to block her foot, which was about to cause more trouble, and closed his eyes again.

"Save your energy, you'll be crying later."

Half an hour later, the black Mercedes-Benz van came to a smooth stop in front of the Yalong Bay luxury hotel.

The two followed the doorman and took the elevator to the top floor.

With a swipe of the access card, the double mahogany doors popped open to the sides with a beep.

The presidential suite is 200 square meters and features floor-to-ceiling windows offering a 270-degree panoramic sea view.

The sea outside was a brilliant blue, and the view was definitely worth the ticket price.

But this is not the point.

The highlight is a huge, 2.2-meter-long circular waterbed placed right in the center of the room.

The bed was covered with an extremely extravagant red velvet quilt, and in the very center of the quilt, a huge heart was made of bright red rose petals.

In the center of the heart shape, two swans with their necks intertwined, made of folded white towels, are positioned as if they are kissing.

On the bedside table, there was even an unopened box of Durex condoms, with two scented candles burning next to it.

That old bastard Wu, he's shameless when it comes to ratings!

Song Yuqi stood in the entryway, her feet seemingly nailed to the ground, unable to take another step.

She stared at the large bed that exuded a strong hormonal aura, her mind buzzing.

A lone man and woman, a double room, flower petals, and condoms.

Is this a recording of "Five Ha" or "Newlywed Diary"?

Jiang Che pushed two suitcases and walked in from behind her.

Without even pausing, he walked straight to the bedside, picked up the two towel swans, and with a flick of his wrist, accurately tossed them into the corner trash can.

Then, he grabbed the edge of the sheet with both hands and shook it forcefully.

With a whoosh, the carefully arranged rose petals fell to the ground like rain, and the huge heart shape vanished in an instant.

"Alright, stop standing there like a doorman."

Jiang Che pushed his suitcase to the wardrobe, glanced at Song Yuqi who was still standing there, and said, "Go pack your things."

Song Yuqi finally found her voice. She pointed to the ridiculously large round bed and stammered as she spoke.

"How...how are we supposed to sleep here? There's only one bed!"

Jiang Che walked to the long leather sofa by the French windows, lay down on it, put his hands behind his head, and crossed his long legs comfortably.

"You sleep in the bed, I'll sleep on the sofa. What, you want me to come up and squeeze in?"

Song Yuqi was speechless with shock at his words.

This man has a silver tongue, but he never speaks human language.

She angrily dragged her suitcase to the wardrobe, unzipped it, and hung up her colorful dresses and tank tops one by one.

Halfway through hanging the phone, she turned and glanced at Jiang Che, who was lying on the sofa playing on his phone.

Although the sofa was long, he was too tall, and his ankles had to dangle outside.

She gritted her teeth, took a spare blanket from the closet, walked to the sofa, and threw it at him in a huff.

"Don't freeze to death tonight, or I'll get scolded by your fans because of it."

Jiang Che pulled the blanket off her face, looked at her stubborn face, and curled the corners of his mouth.

Thanks.

Just as the two of them settled in, the room's loudspeaker suddenly blared, followed by Wu Zheng's hoarse voice.

[Attention all guests! Double rooms are for accommodation only and do not include meals!]

[Red and Blue teams, please proceed to Beach Number One immediately to begin the first match of this event.]

The winner gets to enjoy a top-quality seafood feast in Sanya, while the loser gets a bucket to dig for sand worms on the beach for lunch!

Song Yuqi let out a wail and threw herself onto the soft waterbed.

She knew it wouldn't be so easy to fleece the show's producers!

Meanwhile, on Beach No. 1, one kilometer away from the hotel.

At noon in Sanya, the sun is so intense it could bake a person until they are covered in oil.

Deng Chao and Chen He, shirtless and covered in sweat, struggled with the tangled tent poles.

"What kind of junk is this! Did Old Wu buy some cheap product? I can't even put it together!"

Chen He plopped down in the sand, crumpled the instruction manual in his hand into a ball, and threw it on the ground.

Lu Han was holding a portable fan, her tongue lolling out from the heat.

"Brother Chao, you've stuck that pole in the wrong place; it's a ground nail!"

Dilraba was holding a black UV-protective umbrella, wearing sunglasses, and sitting on a pink folding lounge chair.

She ignored the three clowns and kept her gaze fixed on the magnificent luxury hotel in the distance, beyond the beach.

That damn Jiang Che! He didn't choose his partner of ten years, but instead chose that young, blonde girl!

A king-size bed room with an ocean view, right?

Rose petals, right?

Dilraba refused to believe that the tacit understanding cultivated over the past ten years couldn't compare to a few days of variety show scripts.

Fifteen minutes later, Jiang Che led Song Yuqi onto the beach.

Song Yuqi changed into a refreshing white T-shirt and denim shorts, her two straight legs were dazzlingly white.

Jiang Che was still wearing his black and white casual clothes, walking slowly.

Dilraba spotted the two walking side by side at a glance and stepped onto the soft sand to meet them.

"Senior brother," Reba ignored Song Yuqi and handed Jiang Che a freshly opened iced coconut, "Is the hotel bed soft?"

Jiang Che didn't take the coconut; his gaze swept over the collapsed tent behind her.

"It's alright, but not as down-to-earth as your beach."

Song Yuqi stepped forward and subtly stood between Jiang Che and Reba, taking a bottle of room temperature mineral water from her bag and handing it to Jiang Che.

"He doesn't drink iced drinks; he has a sensitive stomach. Dilraba, you're not a very good partner."

Dilraba's smile turned cold, and she took back the coconut and drank a sip herself.

"Yuqi has a good memory, but it's a pity that men's tastes change."

The two women's eyes met in mid-air, the tension so intense that even the sea breeze couldn't dispel it.

Old Wu appeared just in time, holding a megaphone, interrupting this war without gunfire.

"Everyone assemble! The rules for the first round of the competition are now being announced!"

"The game is called: Protectors of Flowers! The rules are simple: two female guests sit on the punishment chairs in front, with ten balloons filled with seawater hanging above their heads."

"The male guests listen to the questions from ten meters away and answer them quickly. If they answer a question correctly, they can choose to pop a balloon on the head of the female guest."

"For every wrong answer, a balloon on your team's female guest's head pops. Whoever gets soaked first loses!"

Song Yuqi looked at the simple wooden chair in front of her and the large, precariously hanging water balloon above her head, and swallowed hard.

"Old Wu, you call this a protector of flowers? You're just ruthlessly destroying them!"

"Enough talk! Red and blue teams, get ready!"

Song Yuqi and Dilraba were each pressed into a chair.

Jiang Che stood on the buzzer platform directly in front of Song Yuqi, while Deng Chao, representing the blue team, stood directly in front of Dilraba.

"First question, a riddle! What gets dirtier the more you wash it?" Old Wu shouted at the top of his lungs.

Deng Chao reacted quickly, slapping the buzzer: "Clothes!"

"Wrong!" Old Wu declared ruthlessly.

"Pop!" A water balloon above Dilraba's head burst open.

A large bag of icy seawater was poured directly over Dilraba's head, washing her body until it was disheveled and her black halter dress clung to her body.

"Brother Chao..." Dilraba wiped the water from her face, "Clothes don't get dirtier the more you wash them!"

Deng Chao shrank back and chuckled dryly. "A mistake, purely a mistake."

"Red Team, answer the question!"

Jiang Che didn't even bother to use the buzzer; he simply uttered two words into the microphone: "Water."

"Correct answer! Jiang Che from the Red Team, please choose whether to pop the Blue Team's balloon!"

Jiang Che glanced at Dilraba, who was shivering from the rain, and then at Song Yuqi, who was sitting unharmed in a chair.

He raised his hand and snapped his fingers.

The staff immediately stepped forward, holding a needle, about to prick the second balloon on Dilraba's head.

"Wait a minute!" Dilraba suddenly shouted and stood up from her chair.

"Director, this game is unfair. Deng Chao's brain is completely out of control. I'm on his team, and it's just one-sided beatings."

Old Wu was stunned: "Then how do you want to play? The rules are all set, how can you change players halfway through?"

"Who said I was going to replace him?"

Dilraba turned around, her gaze passing directly past Deng Chao, and fixed on Jiang Che, who was standing behind the buzzer.

She raised her hand and pointed in Jiang Che's direction.

"I want to fight him one-on-one."