I'm not mentally ill, I'm a master of a thousand faces!

Chapter 149, Fleeting Beauty

Gao Yuanyuan said goodbye to Li Yun; she had to rush off to film a scene.

Their relationship remained unspoken and tacit.

after all.

I am Li Yun.

I am not "Song Qingshu". Even if I am physically no different from "Song Qingshu", in terms of mind, Song Qingshu has long since left. Li Yun can tell the difference.

I couldn't give her the dream of that infatuated senior brother on Mount Wudang.

The one who can't tell the difference is Zhou Zhiruo, and the other is Gao Yuanyuan.

However, the relationship did not return to its initial state, remaining merely that of colleagues.

she says.

If I have time, I can occasionally go out for a drink.

After we finish drinking, I can see you.

Li Yun said.

Ok.

When?

When I wanted to see Senior Brother Qingshu.

Come find me.

At this moment, Gao Yuanyuan smiled.

"Thank you"

"Need not."

As Gao Yuanyuan turned to leave, she seemed somewhat lost.

Is Song Qingshu the one I really want to see?

at this time.

Li Yun walked down the street, looking for a cigarette.

In his previous life, Li Yun had a smoking habit, but he quit in this life.

After all, smoking is harmful to the body and the skin.

"Boss, a pack of Double Happiness cigarettes, please."

Five yuan.

"Okay."

"The prices here are really different from those in later generations."

Li Yun looked at the Double Happiness cigarettes in his hand. In later generations, these cigarettes would cost 20 yuan, but now they were only 5 yuan.

Having a cigarette and a drink, life is good as it is. Then play a game, use the computer, and read a comic book.

Go watch Wen Riliang's "God of War".

It seems like this guy's comics are almost finished.

Then I went to review my studies and audition for the role of Erlang Shen.

The inspiration for Erlang Shen came from middle-aged scholars.

Seek inspiration from this personality that occasionally talks to itself.

Li Yun understood Erlang Shen to be a noble celestial being.

While gentle and refined, he was also cold-blooded and ruthless.

There is also a kind of divine that is high above, yet it also has a place that connects with people.

The roles that make up the group.

Li Yun felt that the most important thing was his divinity, and the humanity wrapped in that divinity.

That aloof and superior demeanor.

You need to portray the feeling of "god".

But Erlang Shen in "The Lotus Lantern" is contradictory. He has divinity, but he also has a human side, which is the most interesting part.

In fact, Erlang Shen was not perfect from the beginning; he also struggled. He struggled from beginning to end.

The struggle within oneself.

at this time.

Li Yun wanted to approach the issue from the perspective of a "divine being," and coincidentally, the most prominent characteristic of this middle-aged scholar was his divinity, that feeling of being beyond the mortal world.

After deciding on the direction of the audition, Li Yun returned home, intending to wash up.

While washing up in front of the mirror.

Li Yun looked at herself in the mirror.

It is "Nie Renwang".

In the blink of an eye, my eyes are closed.

He became known as "Song Qingshu" again.

Then he became Cao Zhengchun, and then he became the Fire Cloud Evil God.

"Wasn't it supposed to give me +5 mental resistance? Where did those 5 points go?"

Li Yun looked at the changes in her appearance and demeanor in the mirror.

He experienced hallucinations.

Changes have occurred.

If it were anyone else, they would definitely break down, go crazy, take medication, and become depressed.

But Li Yun could only think that the system was malfunctioning.

Could this feeling be incorporated into the acting?

However, Li Yun still felt that he hadn't encountered such genuinely crazy acting skills yet.

"Yes, remember this feeling; you'll definitely be able to use it next time."

Li Yun looked at the myriad changes reflected in the mirror, his brows furrowed indifferently, showing no emotion whatsoever.

Until the person in the mirror becomes "yourself".

wrong.

It's not "me".

It was Li Yun.

Li Yun, who was abandoned by her family and left in an orphanage, eventually lost her mother and didn't even know who her living father was.

"The people who loved me are gone, I have nothing, I've lost everything. I don't want to live anymore. I wear a mask, no one expects anything from me, and I don't even know who expects me to be."

"We're all the same, all alone. Nobody cares about you. What they like and care about is the mask you wear, not who you are."

In the mirror, young Li Yun expresses her feelings with her innocent face.

Li Yun watched the outpouring of memories like a bystander.

The world is gray.

It is gray.

It's empty.

This is how the world is for him.

There is still resentment.

The person who should have loved him didn't.

The person who shouldn't have left him left him.

All alone.

The world is full of misfortunes. When a speck of dust lands on your shoulder, you realize how heavy it is. Although Li Yun can coldly observe the memories of this body, his past, everything about him, and although he can empathize with him and get close to his bones and soul, I am ultimately that drifter who transmigrated because of an unlucky disease.

I can empathize with you.

But 'I' am absolutely just 'I'.

of course.

He was right about one thing: that self-deprecating remark.

Love, damn it, only happens when you're wearing a mask.

They only like the roles, or rather, they like being able to play other roles.

Even Jiang Chenggang, wasn't it only because of his acting talent that they became friends? Otherwise, it would just be a relationship between fellow villagers, or between a group leader and an extra.

This kind of sorrow.

There are still some

It's still there.

So much so that I can't tell the difference.

The person in the mirror, his changes, the roles he has played.

The characters who are loved by people

Thinking about this, Li Yun felt like smoking.

Just at this moment.

Suddenly, QQ started beeping, with a series of beeping sounds.

Li Yun looked at the clock on the wall; it was already 11:23 PM.

QQ in this era still has some integrity; at least it doesn't randomly spam messages to bother people. If it rings at this time, it really means someone is looking for you.

It's very late now.

Who would send me a message now?

Li Yun was somewhat puzzled, so he got up and returned to his computer.

But when I saw it, I was stunned. It was a cartoon cat avatar.

This is information about Liu Qianqian.

"Brother Li! Are you going to celebrate New Year's Eve together this year? I have fireworks to watch. I've been busy with school and martial arts training for the past two months and haven't had time to use the computer. (*^-^)"

Li Ge

at this time.

Li Yun replied with a message.

"Okay!!! (cat head) Then how about we go buy fireworks ourselves? It'll definitely feel better to set them off ourselves than to watch others do it."

"Oh, is that okay?"

For Liu Qianqian, secretly inviting someone to watch fireworks was already something her mother forbade, let alone setting off fireworks.

At this moment, the girl wrapped in the bear pajamas was even a little hesitant.

Until Li Yun continued speaking.

"Sure, I'm a reliable adult, I can buy fireworks."

"(Uh-huh)!!"

In this era, fireworks are not yet banned and can still be seen and set off everywhere—of course, you can't cause trouble, because if you do, you'll still have to take responsibility.

Although with the development of the times, this thing will still be swept into a corner.

But at least, this fleeting moment of beauty is something we can experience. We can bloom it ourselves.

Yes, that's possible.

See you again

I accepted Liu Qianqian's invitation to set off fireworks together.

When Li Yun turned around again, the world before him was quite different. Everything in his field of vision had returned to a colorful hue, and the originally gray bathroom had become somewhat colorful.

The Fire Cloud Evil God, Cao Zhengchun, and Song Qingshu no longer appeared in the mirror.

just me.

Only Li Yun.

Li Yun was stunned.

Laughed

The cigarettes I was meant to use to drown my sorrows ended up in the trash... Well, I can't waste them, since they're unopened, I can return them.

But it costs five yuan!

"Cigarettes are harmful, I should continue to quit. Time for bed, time to prepare for the audition for Erlang Shen. I need to continue treatment and continue development."

The next day, Li Yun slept in late. He hadn't been sleeping well for the past few days, and today, after a long break from exercise, he took a long nap.

Li Yun made preparations and went to audition for the role of Erlang Shen in "The Lotus Lantern." The audition was to be held in the capital city.

The advantages of living in the capital are truly tangible and visible.

Many film and television productions hold auditions in Beijing. For example, "The Lotus Lantern" is a production by CCTV, so the audition location was undoubtedly Beijing as well.

At this moment, Li Yun continued to look in the mirror, where only his handsome face was reflected, but he still murmured to himself.

"I know I'm being influenced by you all. I've started to love eating beef and steamed buns. But I'm not afraid of you. I will only continue to use you in my acting career, and when I see you off, I will remember that I am Li Yun."

"besides."

"If you're concerned about who your biological father is, then I think I can keep an eye out for him if I have the time. After all, we've been in the entertainment industry for a while now. If he's in the movies, we're bound to run into him eventually. The industry is only so big, and there are only so many people in the entire entertainment circle. Of course, if your dad is a flop in the film industry, then I have nothing to say."

"You became an actor, a struggling actor in Hengdian, perhaps to find your father, to get closer to your family, and to gain his approval. This is not a wrong thing, and longing for your family's approval is absolutely not wrong. But there's something I need to make clear to you."

"My obsession with acting stems from my desire to become a dazzling, multifaceted film emperor. I need to cure my mental illness, to reach the pinnacle of my life, and to meet more people, to meet better people. I have no other obsession with that non-existent kinship with you."

Li Yun still solemnly distinguished the difference between "I" and "me": how I lived, how I died, how I traveled through time, and how I carried out my dreams.

These are all deeply etched in my memory, in the memory of the living "me".

"I can help you, but that's all I can do."

Then Li Yun turned and left.

Not long after leaving the restroom, I went back in and looked in the mirror.

"If he really is the kind of scumbag I think he is, I'll give him a punch if I get the chance."

"I don't feel guilty. After all, he's your father, not mine."

(End of this chapter)