I'm not mentally ill, I'm a master of a thousand faces!

Chapter 137, Today is another day of good mental state.

"If you stab that guy for me, you can have this steak."

The wealthy man, high and mighty, pointed to an old beggar on the other side.

He looked at the gaunt boy with a mocking expression.

Li Yun was puzzled. He had no grudge against that person. In fact, the person had taken pity on him before and given him porridge.

But the wealthy people passing by would choose this old beggar.

Why choose Li Yun to do this?

Because it's interesting.

The sight of a young, emaciated, dying boy transforming into a beast in his struggle to survive is itself a source of amusement for them.

Would I do that?

Li Yun didn't know.

Hunger, wounds, and the feeling of impending death had already blurred my senses.

But the will to survive still prevailed.

The rich man gave him a fine little knife.

kill.

That way, they can survive.

As long as we amuse them, we can survive.

I will be able to survive.

The singer's voice still lingered in my ears.

"Yetianhai, Yetianhai."

"Tianhai is a city that never sleeps."

Suddenly.

Li Yun woke up with a start.

Has she woken up?

I remember being in Pig Cage Alley

How?

The walls are mottled, and the lights are yellowish.

What a dilapidated place.

Where is this place?

When Li Yun opened her eyes and got out of bed again...

He realized that he was no longer the young "Fire Cloud Evil God".

But

There's a mirror right next to it.

Looking in the mirror.

The reflection shows a small face that looks remarkably like Zunlong.

Oh.

It was me.

here it is.

The dormitory of the welfare home.

The time Li Yun spent in the orphanage.

I am Li Yun.

A drifter.

In my past life, I contracted an illness due to making bad friends and was transported to a parallel world. Unfortunately, I developed schizophrenia. I have mixed feelings about this illness. Although it is annoying most of the time, it occasionally gives me some easy-going friends, such as Murong Fu and that middle-aged scholar.

There are also things that bother people, like the eccentric youth who is about to become the Fire Cloud Evil God.

but.

I am Li Yun.

Before I came, he was also Li Yun, a man who dreamed of becoming an actor but almost starved to death while working as an extra in Hengdian World Studios.

Okay, this aligns with me; we're all drifters, cogs in the machine, drifters in Beijing and Hengdian.

What kind of person is he?

correct.

An orphan living in a welfare home.

"So thin." Li Yun lifted her clothes, and there was a mirror in the orphanage next to her.

It was before the constitution was +10.

I've been this thin since I was a child.

"I'm hungry, I want to eat meat."

"You still want to eat meat? It's good enough that you're eating something."

The caregiver in charge of Li Yun tossed a large steamed bun to Li Yun.

I don't like eating steamed buns.

Because I ate steamed buns for every meal when I was a child.

饿.

Sometimes hungry, sometimes full.

But Li Yun didn't hate them.

After all, the welfare home and government agencies are already doing you a favor by keeping you alive.

"Your mother dumped you here."

"My mom. I used to have a mom."

Yeah, how could I have been born without a mother?

Li Yun recalled that song.

【YetianhaiYetianhai.】

oh.

This song.

My mom sang it too.

Mom said.

He approached her and struck up a conversation when she was playing this song on the radio on campus. "You listen to such an old song?"

"Aren't old songs good?"

The mother's figure was actually very blurry.

At least.

For Li Yun now, when memories and dreams cut to her face, it's like a mosaic. She is a very quiet woman who likes to recite poetry, read books, and listen to classical music from the last century.

You can only feel that gentleness from afar—a gentleness that feels unfamiliar.

"mom."

"Where's Dad?"

"I lied to you before; your father isn't actually dead."

"Your father works in film; he's a very capable person."

"Then why didn't he come to pick us up?"

"Our family backgrounds are very different. He couldn't fight against his parents, so he had no choice but to leave us. Don't blame him; he had no choice in the matter."

He already lacked a father's love, and later his mother also passed away due to illness.

I grew up in an orphanage until I was 18.

He didn't even finish vocational high school before he went out to work.

Occasionally, when I see other families living happily together, I always think that the kind of happiness where parents hold their children's hands and stroll through the streets is something that doesn't belong to me.

Because Mom once said...

My father works in the film industry.

Therefore, I also want to work on TV dramas.

So, I went to Hengcheng.

I feel empty.

The body is empty.

The soul is also empty.

The future is empty.

But he has an obsession with acting; he'd rather starve than not act.

"Survive"

Li Yun plunged the dagger into the beggar's chest.

The old beggar looked at Li Yun calmly. He recognized the little beggar as the one he had once helped.

Those who once showed kindness turned their backs on them.

How ironic this is.

It was originally an ironic situation.

However, the old beggar's eyes remained completely calm.

This intensified Li Yun's already strong sense of guilt.

Yes, it's guilt.

He had clearly saved him, given him a bowl of porridge, and saved him from dying yesterday, allowing him to live until now.

But now, in order to live, she has stabbed him in the body.

He didn't even resist.

Go ahead and scold me.

Hurry up and hit me!

Tell me I'm not a thing, I'm trash.

You can hit me, scold me, insult me, do whatever you want, because I did this despicable thing just to survive.

But the old man in front of me did not do that.

He simply said it calmly.

"Live on."

at this time.

Li Yun didn't see the old beggar show any hope or expectation for life in the world, and he remained so calm even when he was killed.

In his eyes.

Li Yun could not see any light.

Their perception of the world was bleak and somber.

Bright lights and bustling activity.

Even the very act of 'living' itself didn't belong to him.

He simply wasn't that kind of person.

"Hahahaha! I knew he was capable of murder. These poor people, give them a little something, and they'll kill and set fires for you, hahahaha."

"You really understand the poor, Chief Liu."

"Ha ha ha ha."

A piece of beef covered in mud was thrown in front of me.

It was covered in black mud.

steak.

It smells good.

It smells really good!

Even steaks that have been soaked in stinky water.

It still smells so good.

"Live on."

"You're not a child without parents, it's just that Mommy can no longer watch you grow up, I'm so sorry."

"In the orphanage, you must listen to your elders and teachers. You must study hard and live a good life. Even though I'm not by your side, I am still here, in your memories."

Beside the patient's bed in the ward.

Li Yun’s mother’s gentle hands caressed her face, and the warmth felt even more real.

There was also a very real, pungent medicinal smell.

It's incredibly realistic.

That feeling was vividly present throughout Li Yun's body.

I really want to win my mother back.

But I was powerless to do anything about it and could only watch it all happen.

Her final request was still to live on.

From then on, he was all alone.

That feeling of being detached and lonely.

It made Li Yun feel uncomfortable all over, itchy, and even empty.

Empty

The boy naturally joined the gang.

Maybe it's the "Axe Gang" or maybe it's the "Hammer Gang".

In any case, in this place, the poor can only survive by becoming tools of the rich.

Whether it's for entertainment.

Let's do some dirty work instead.

But ultimately, it's something that's needed.

Just like a stinky toad.

To live on shamelessly.

Struggle to survive

When a teenager is able to stab an elderly person who helped him with a knife.

He was already 'dead'.

I am brave and daring.

They dare to fight with knives.

For a steak.

Delicious steak

As long as I kill someone.

I can get steak. I can not only eat leftovers and rotten porridge, but also steak!

I.

I.

As long as I kill, I hone my killing skills, I kill, kill, kill, until I become the ultimate killing king.

I have an endless supply of steaks to eat.

When Li Yun woke up.

It was already past midnight.

I had a dream.

I dreamt that I became the young Fire Cloud Evil God.

I also dreamed about myself as a child.

Those painful memories brought tears to Li Yun's eyes.

but.

quickly

"This pain, this emptiness—yes, that's right, if I mix that feeling into 'Fire Cloud Evil God,' I can truly feel it."

Li Yun wondered if there was something wrong with her brain.

When memories of physical pain resurface.

My first thought was to make him nourishment for the "Fire Cloud Evil God".

Ask him to help him act

But no matter how you look at it.

Li Yun was trying hard to recall the feeling from her dream.

Whether it's a teenager in a cannibalistic society.

I am still the same 'me' who has no relatives or friends and no one to rely on.

Mix them together.

Put them together.

混淆

融合

At this moment.

Li Yun felt that his mind was very blurry, like paste.

But that feeling also brought an unparalleled, indescribable pleasure.

Keep this painful yet vague feeling.

When Li Yun arrived at Jenny's room on the third floor of "Pig Cage Alley," there was a mirror there. It was also the entire crew's dressing room.

Mirror at midnight

Li Yun looked at herself in the mirror.

He repeated himself.

"It's either me killing the two of you here, or you two killing me."

When those memories of "Fire Cloud Evil God" and "my" pain are mixed together.

Make a smile that's crazier than pain.

They actually used my own painful trauma to act out a play—

I must be crazy.

[Today's host's mental state is assessed as: Dangerous!]

Does the host require this system to temporarily block it?

"Need not."

"That's good."

"That's good."

At this moment, Li Yun grabbed the mirror, stared wide-eyed at herself in the mirror.

"It's either me killing the two of you here, or you two killing me."

"Either I kill the two of you here, or you two kill me!!!"

"Either I kill the two of you here, or you two kill me!!"

Pig Cage Alley at night.

Li Yun's voice echoed in this man-made slum.

(End of this chapter)